Things not to do in a picture

[DGrey 28]

^ We don't reveal face pictures until after email contact has been initiated. I can't take any chances of any kind with a student or a student's parent coming across a pic without even having emailed us.

[NandTfromCA 84]

...I was recognized by someone from work...

I’m curious to hear more about that, if you wouldn’t mind sharing.

 

How did you find out they saw you? Why were they on there? How has it changed your relationship with them or others that might have found out? You own your own business, right?

 

Not that I need to tell you but feel free to ignore any/all of those questions.

[Chicup 38]

How did you find out they saw you? Why were they on there? How has it changed your relationship with them or others that might have found out? You own your own business, right?

 

Not that I need to tell you but feel free to ignore any/all of those questions.

 

Friend of ours talked to them, they mentioned it.

 

They are swingers.

 

Dunno yet.

 

Yes I do, but I deal with subcontractors.

 

The problem was for a while I didn't know who they were but they knew us, not a good feeling.

[prettylady 221]

This is great,

 

Dog and I are taking pics this weekend for our site.

 

I told him right off that I did not want my "prize" to be posted all over the internet. I find most of the pics unflattering. I have pulled a face and carried over some of the pics a couple of times only to see later that their bios are great.

 

I want outside shots showing me doing MY thing...you will see next week. I like the candid shots of happy people enjoying themselves. That is what I want for Dog and I.

 

Thanks for the ideas guys. I will keep you posted and perhaps like the other thread you can let me know what I did right or wrong.

[ShellyM 1]

JustAskJulie said:

Why is it that when people post pics with their ads they pick the post awful pictures? I mean, do they not look at them?

 

Thank GOODNESS someone finally said this!! We were just saying the same thing the other day! This is a picture that is in a way "selling" a couple so to speak to prospective swingers. So you go and put a picture where you are half asleep, no make up, nothin. It trips me out!

[Charger500 30]

discoandvyper said:

...People like this need not have profile photos. It'd up their chances at meeting, but even then I imagine people who meet would immediately turn that class of people down. What's needed is a lifestyle change on their part.

 

Well other 400 pound people living in squalor may find it appealing

 

My favorite is of the lady all naked next to a crib or with a baby walker nearby...

[LFM2 1,481]

I just have to chime in here.

 

I can't speak for Mr. LFM, but I prefer either G or PG rated pictures. If they have other naughty pictures that only they authorize, that's cool, but I really dislike primary pictures of crotch shots and cleavage.

 

Don't get me wrong. I love bodies. I think they are all special and good in their own way. Except maybe for the posters that discoandvyper talked about. I just don't want that to be first thing I see when I open up a page browsing a site.

 

I don't have a problem with chopped off heads. Hell, the pics that my Mr. LFM and I have posted in SLS are hidden unless we authorize because they are full face shots.

 

We gotta get busy getting a recent full pose. Sans our heads of course!

[agdeli 15]

Just curious, what do you folks think make good photo layouts for sites like SLS and others.

 

For me personally, I think a simple what do you look like photo is best for all sites. It simply gives a face to the name and lets the personality do the rest of the talking.

 

After the simple "what do I look like" photo, photos that enhance your personality are nice to see. EX, (you engaged in a hobby you enjoy...skiing, or hiking perhaps). Swingers board or not, I'm not into raunchy photos of strangers as ice breakers. If I want to see pics like that I have a whole world wide web at my disposal. And, when I do look up pics like that it's for a laugh.

[Concupiscence 16]

We were recently contacted by a gent who was wearing a full Batman costume. It was one that could have been worn in the movies, pointy eared mask, fake abs, cape and all. I wanted so very much to just respond with:

 

Dear Sir,

 

You are wearing a Batman costume. Thank you for your interest but we as a couple are looking more for the Green Lantern type. His abs are real.

 

Best Regards...

 

I didn't do this, but I so very much wanted to.

[havefuninsun 122]

This question isn't about pictures in the profile that turn you off per se, but the initial profile pics on ads that is supposed to grab your attention.

 

When you log into an adult site (lets use SLS as the example), what pictures pop up on that main menu and you just say "whoa! what were they thinking?!?"

 

Last night, there was an ad and it was the woman's big white pimply ass ... who thinks pimply asses are attractive? I know some like white asses. Some like big asses. Some like big white asses. But is there a market for pimple asses??

 

Come on people -- at least show your best side. If this is it ... man!

[JustAskJulie 2,588]

Any close-up genital shots whether male or female. I will usually click through in HOPES that there is more to their ad and an actual picture of the couple... but I'm usually dissapointed.

[VegasLee 1,486]

We are kind with Julie on this one.

 

Difference being is we won't bother to take the time to click through. We just move on and find people that feel there is a better side of them then close up genital shots.

[LFM2 1,481]

When I read this, I immediately thought of a couple that Dave had written to. Their initial picture wasn't bad. They wrote back a few days later and their default picture was absolute horror. It was a face shot of her, but either their camera or something made her face red. I'm talking clown red. Her hair was stark white, red face, her eye shadow blue as a robin's egg. I looked at Dave and he looked back at me and I asked him if he really emailed them. Looking through their other pictures, they didn't look that bad... But I had to wonder--why would they use that one as their default???

[good times 990]

I have to say that the ass picture closely followed by genital pics are the ones that most often make us think, "what the heck were they thinking". It amazes me how the bent over showing the ass picture is so common, yet so few women have an ass that photographs well, and while I don't particularly mind genital pics in a profile, I don't think they make a good default picture.

[socolais 696]

I don't browse profiles often, but if the default photo and tag line catch my attention, I might open the profile for a closer look. A profile is very much like a resume - the good ones float to the top of the pile.....

[VanHlebar 187]

Not so much a turn off of a picture, but the pictures that are not in the profile are what bug us. We see sooo many profiles with only the wife and no pics of the husband. Come on guys, give the gals a break. They want to see what they are getting into also right? I mean would you really send out an email to a couple if the pics where only of the husband?

 

Also not a big fan of the genital shots. We prefer tastefully done everyday shots of both the husband and the wife if a couple. Preferably at least one with the couple actually in the same picture together. We don't need face pics in the profile and we don't need nudity. If all works out well we will see all that later.

[JustAskJulie 2,588]

VegasLee said:

We are kind with Julie on this one.

 

Difference being is we won't bother to take the time to click through. We just move on and find people that feel there is a better side of them then close up genital shots.

 

I have a bit of a double standard here.... if it was just a pic of a dick I wouldn't click through at all... and to be honest as many times as I've clicked through on something else and found that it was a waste of time I don't know why I do it there... maybe I'm just a little too hopeful.

 

If all you've got to show me is your dick, then I assume you are one.

[The Fuse 1,012]

If a couple's default picture is of them in baggy, schlumpy clothes and baseball caps, that is a turnoff for me. Do people really think that will attract people looking for sex? Is there a schlumpy clothes fetish I haven't heard of? (The list of fetishes I haven't heard of is undoubtably long, but this one seems unlikely.)

 

...and although breast pictures are obviously a good thing in most cases to attract men and bi-sexual women, if most of a couples' pictures are "tits... tits... and hey, more tits!" I tend to wonder what the entire lady looks like. If you have great tits, by all means show them off. But please let us see some more of you.

 

Oh, and I'm with Mr. Van -- gotta see some pictures of the guy. That comment says more about what turns me off in terms of lack of pictures, of course, but I had to throw it in here.

[rpu3 630]

- erect penis pictures (close up - that's all you see. How 'bout some chest while you are at it?)

 

- 1/2 the front page pics of her breasts either naked or in a bra or her ass in panties - but that's all there is (i.e., it's not a body shot, just ass or boobs), and it's always in conjunction with no pictures of the male.

 

How 'bout just some full body pics? You can blur out the face, and you can be fully clothed, but give me something that says I might be attracted to you on a body level, at least!

[two4youinswva 3,067]

JustAskJulie said:

If all you've got to show me is your dick, then I assume you are one.

 

That statement is so full of win!

That should be on a poster or something.

 

I think I'm going to submit it to Wikiquote for you.

 

Oh, and I agree with all previous comments.

[fun4Ds 1,097]

I suppose the pictures taken while standing in the bathroom, looking in the mirror. We have seen male and females do it.

 

I don't want to see a toilet and their dirty laundry on the floor ....W.T.F

[sweet_tna 680]

Close-ups of genitalia and/or no pics of both people cause us to pass a profile by.

[Pepper & Drew 384]

So often I see pics that are so unflattering that I wonder if people actually looked at the pic before they posted it.

 

If you look pissed off in the photo, don't post it.

If you have pimples on your butt, photoshop them out.

Close-ups so close that you can't tell what body part you're looking at are not sexy.

Fuzzy and far away pics raise all sorts of red flags.

If you're going to have webcam pics, make sure it's not mostly of the top of your head and that there's enough light.

Don't have a bunch of pictures of other people on your profile. Don't make us guess who the actual couple is.

 

I could go on, but I won't.

 

Pepper

[Ellyanne77 81]

I agree completely with the last two..amazing what we see in the pictures!!

[JofRIT 15]

Two things that have annoyed me while looking around on SLS:

 

1. Pictures of, say, just a woman's feet. Yeah, some people are really into feet, but I'm going to guess that feet rank pretty low on most people's priorities.

 

2. The "I'm hiding myself" pic, as seen on myspace. Look, if you're not happy with your body, say you're overweight, you might be able to partially disguise your body type by holding your camera up over your head and shooting down so as only to show face and breasts. This might work fine for you online, but if you meet someone, they're going to see what you look like anyway. Besides, when I see such a picture, I just say, "Trying to hide, I'm moving on".

 

That's why my SLS main picture is a clothed full-body picture with my head shopped out.

[Ellyanne77 81]

We live in the south so let me add a few more that have made us say WTF!

 

1. Picture of the male shooting his bow and arrow in the back yard.

 

2. There is actually a profile close to where we live and the guy is standing in front of a wall in his home and the entire wall is covered in his big knife collection. What are they advertising...hey I'm an axe murderer.

 

3.Pictures where there are confederate flags everywhere or the girl is in a rebel flag bikini.

 

4. Guys in speedo's. Unless your European, who actually finds that attractive.

 

5. And my biggest peeve, move the damn dirty laundry out of the floor before you take a pic.

[JofRIT 15]

2. There is actually a profile close to where we live and the guy is standing in front of a wall in his home and the entire wall is covered in his big knife collection. What are they advertising...hey I'm an axe murderer.

 

I'll admit, I am *sorta* guilty of this--I have a (private) picture of myself standing on the porch in Hawaii holding a bunch of bananas and the machete I used to cut them down. The difference, though, is that I have a good reason to be holding the big knife.

[good times 990]

Some of these later posts made me think of one that should have been my number one or two, don't know how it slipped my mind.

 

That is people that post pictures of their motorcycle, if the bike is the main focal point of your pictures, you would have to be extremely hot for us not to pass you by. A girl in a sexy pose on a bike might be passable, but I have seen profiles where they posted some pictures of just the bike. WTF, I have done some kinky things in my life, but I am pretty sure I don't want to screw your bike. It is kind of good on one hand though. We have noticed when we meet folks at the club that can't stop talking about their bike, when we look at their profile, it usually has bike pictures in it.

[Volleygirl1790 15]

For us we always look at what is in the background of the pictures...we have seen people with their faces blurred but a family picture in plain veiw with all their faces in plain sight.... Also I love pictures that the people can't take time to put down their Cigs to have the pic taken......

 

Please people is this the impression that you want people to see....LORD!!!

[Tybee Swing 286]

These are absolute turn-offs: full-on ass shots (oh gawd, DON'T show me your puckering asshole!), and close up genitalia shots. Family pics ( are they thinking??)

 

I can think of a lot of pet peeves, pictures that will be irritating and may increase the likelihood that we won't be interested in them, but most of them have already been listed.

[hamlet 53]

I'm not a fan of really big tits (even though my wife is large-breasted--but, in my unprejudiced opinion, any part of her looks simply because it's part of HER), and neither of us likes artificial tits. So, when the shot that fronts the profile consists of two huge mounds with the perfect roundness of volleyballs, I generally scroll on past it.

 

And, while I understand the desire of women to see the men that might be interacting with, we're always suspicious of profiles from supposed couples in which only the man is seen in the picture. We always wonder why the woman is invisible: perhaps she doesn't look so good? or perhaps she doesn't exist? Besides, my wife is bi so, even though she wouldn't mind having a look at the man, both of us are interested in seeing a shot of the woman.

[LFM2 1,481]

We have put in our profile that if you email us and there are pictures of cock shots only, they will be deleted. I hate seeing just a picture of a guy's tool. I already know what they look like. Is that all they have to offer? If they're male, I'm going to assume they have a cock and I really don't want to see it at that time. Maybe later, but not now.

 

Don't get me wrong, because I LOVE men. I love what they have to offer, but I prefer G-rated or at least PG-rated pics. Those are the ones that will get my attention! Dave says to give 'em a break because they're just trying to "sell" themselves, but I just can't.

[The Fuse 1,012]

Some of these later posts made me think of one that should have been my number one or two, don't know how it slipped my mind.

 

That is people that post pictures of their motorcycle, if the bike is the main focal point of your pictures, you would have to be extremely hot for us not to pass you by. A girl in a sexy pose on a bike might be passable, but I have seen profiles where they posted some pictures of just the bike. WTF, I have done some kinky things in my life, but I am pretty sure I don't want to screw your bike. It is kind of good on one hand though. We have noticed when we meet folks at the club that can't stop talking about their bike, when we look at their profile, it usually has bike pictures in it.

Oh yes, this reminds me -- pictures of people next to their fancy cars are a turnoff for me. Why would people think their car makes them more attractive to a playmate? I mean, if you were on a singles dating site, that makes a certain amount of sense -- you are advertising that you are rich, which some potential dates might find attractive, if we're being realistic. But in swinging, it couldn't matter less. After all, I'm not going to benefit from your money in a swinging relationship.

[bodyshots 15]

Ohhhh...the list is long here...I get very skeptical and usually delete messages from couples when I can't get a pretty good idea what they look like from their pix.

 

1. Pics of them standing in clothes that look like they are cleaning the house - and the surrounding house is a complete mess.

 

2. No make up or other attempts cleam themselves up. Comb your hair for gods sake. Also, unkept sloppy looking and people who obviously don't take care of themselves

 

3. Body part only shots without face. If you aren't going to show me your face how are we going to recognize you if and when we meet.

 

4. Genitals only - We're all pretty much the same, why would you think your's are so special that pix of that is the deal closer.

 

I could go on and on

[SCcpl40 74]

On initial or default profile pics, people must remember, you only have one opportunity to make a good first impression! From selling an idea to catching a fish, it's all about presentation. You're selling yourself to the world, make sure you're using the right bait.

[Guest ibn battuta]

I have a dumb question, when you do see a profile picture on SLS of a disheveled-looking lady or gentleman with a full facial pic, do you think that's real? Or is that just someone messing with them? Or a fake pic? Because, really, it just seems to me...why would you do that?? Who responds to the 80 year old woman with the "I've got Catitude" oversized nighty with the half-eaten Arby's sandwich in her lap? I mean, I'm not trying to judge, but...come on!

[Tybee Swing 286]

3. Body part only shots without face. If you aren't going to show me your face how are we going to recognize you if and when we meet.

 

Very few people post face pics for their initial/main profile pic.

 

The way you recognize them when you meet: shared pics from a private album or via email, after you've had enough communication that you decide you want to meet.

[prettylady 221]

Volleygirl1790 said:

Also I love pictures that the people can't take time to put down their Cigs to have the pic taken......!!!

 

Would you believe I was part of a wedding party that the bride didn't put down her cigs while getting her pics done.

She just turned it into her hand.....can still see the butt end girl

 

Dog and I took some pictures for our profile. We down loaded them, set up our profile and sat back to admire our work. Then I realized (a day later) that there are pictures behind me. School pics of my kids, me with some of my peers that I train and fight with, and a family picture with the WHOLE family. It was clear as day who these people were.

 

I felt so STUPID. It is now gone.

 

Lesson learnt. I am much more careful with my surroundings now.

[havefuninsun 122]

3. Body part only shots without face. If you aren't going to show me your face how are we going to recognize you if and when we meet.

 

We don't share face pictures. We have had no issue "finding" those who we want to meet with. We describe each other and usually say, "I'll be the short girl with the purple sweater and jeans with the tall guy with a goatee and a shirt unbuttoned to his belly button so you can see his chest hair."

 

Well -- not really the latter -- heeheehee -- just trying to make a point.

 

There ARE people who brave a beer with a couple whom they haven't seen their face.

[LikeMinds321 1,527]

prettylady said:

 

Lesson learnt. I am much more careful with my surroundings now.

I removed our microwave from a picture!

 

I have become very aware of the background in our public pictures. I've always made sure it was clean and attractive, but I didn't think about how a home can give yourself away as much as your body (even if your heads are missing from the picture).

 

I can just see a neighbor seeing a public pic - not knowing what we look like nude or partially clothed - but saying to themselves, "Hey, isn't that our neighbor's microwave with the bowl sitting on top that we gave them for their anniversary?!"

[Greg & Sheryl 368]

When it comes to single males, nothing makes a straight man look more gay than having an ass shot as the only photo on his profile.

[Ellyanne77 81]

When it comes to single males, nothing makes a straight man look more gay than having an ass shot as the only photo on his profile.

 

Unless he was blowing another guy in that pic. That would be slightly more gay. lol

[prettylady 221]

LikeMinds321 said:

I can just see a neighbor seeing a public pic - not knowing what we look like nude or partially clothed - but saying to themselves, "Hey, isn't that our neighbor's microwave with the bowl sitting on top that we gave them for their anniversary?!"

 

Something similar happened to friends of ours. We were pervin' their sls site when I noticed a picture on the wall behind them.

I PMed them and said "hey you know that is the exact same picture that 'so and so' has on their wall".

 

I hope their relationship with the other couple wasn't a huge secret, because if it was they were busted.

 

We joked about it. But like you said, background gives just as much info as your intended subject. Watch out of unusual pieces of art as well as bowls on your microwave.

[sweet_tna 680]

Oh well, we'll be pegged now for sure. People we know will recognize our furniture and the Steelers stuff on our walls. Then again, what're they doing on sls . . .?

 

The stuff that bothers me is people who have pics of themselves that make you wonder if they looked in the mirror before they got the camera out. (Baggy sweats, uncombed hair, etc.)

[Thrax 384]

Greg & Sheryl said:

When it comes to single males, nothing makes a straight man look more gay than having an ass shot as the only photo on his profile.

Okay G&S, I have to ask this question: Is it just a pic of the guy's ass, or a does the whole back-of-the-head to the upper-thighs back-shot make you think of gayness, too?

 

I'd like to know, because the latter has actually garnered me some praise from couples and single females, while I'd be EXTREMELY reluctant to show just an ass shot, 'cause I'd tend to agree with you.

[jennandjamesinm 87]

I was surfing SLS and saw a profile pic that made me think of this thread. She was "face down, ass up" in her pic, but that's not what the turn off was. In the background was a baby crib and changing table. Sorry, but that's your KIDS bedroom!

 

Jenn

[BiFemCpl03 16]

Maybe we are different, but we don't post any kind of pic The only time we share is when we start to talk to someone...I know that sounds nuts, but it's just how we are...We don't post anything.

[Ed & Bunny 160]

LikeMinds321 said:

I can just see a neighbor seeing a public pic - not knowing what we look like nude or partially clothed - but saying to themselves, "Hey, isn't that our neighbor's microwave with the bowl sitting on top that we gave them for their anniversary?!"

 

Hey, think though, It could be a good way to find playmates real close to home. LOL just kidding.

 

For us we hate to see all the pictures and not one smile. Is your life so bad you cant smile? If you look unhappy do you really think we want to share in your misery.

 

Also I think we can agree on pretty much everything else that has already been posted. What are some people thinking.

[prettylady 221]

Thrax said:

Okay G&S, I have to ask this question: Is it just a pic of the guy's ass, or a does the whole back-of-the-head to the upper-thighs back-shot make you think of gayness, too?

 

I'd like to know, because the latter has actually garnered me some praise from couples and single females, while I'd be EXTREMELY reluctant to show just an ass shot, 'cause I'd tend to agree with you.

I think I may need to see that picture in order to make a judgement call.

[Greg & Sheryl 368]

Thrax said:

Okay G&S, I have to ask this question: Is it just a pic of the guy's ass, or a does the whole back-of-the-head to the upper-thighs back-shot make you think of gayness, too?

 

I'd like to know, because the latter has actually garnered me some praise from couples and single females, while I'd be EXTREMELY reluctant to show just an ass shot, 'cause I'd tend to agree with you.

Thankfully, the "back-of-the-head to the upper-thighs back" shot isn't nearly as bad as the closely cropped ass shot. We're sure there are ladies who might appreciate either shot, but for us, they just make us cringe.