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Overcome Your Fears and Live Life Our first adventure is not over. The man sleeping next to me is not my husband, I can’t sleep from our exciting fun we are having with our hosts. A New Bisexual Swinger

I'm going to follow this up just in case anyone feels like they got left hanging. We did eventually get together with my friend and his wife. They are vanilla, but my wife says there has always been flirtation and chemistry, so when we got together my wife and I were committed to testing the waters with them. As is always advised, my wife took the lead. She dressed sexy and made sure there was a lot of subtle touching between her and my friend's wife. Long story short, the two ladies did make out with each other much to the delight of both husbands (and the ladies too), but nothing more... until next time!

The last week of August, Shannon texted David and me saying that she and Joe are visiting relatives in a nearby town and asking if we were going to be at home and free over the Labor Day weekend. Lunch, dinner maybe. I was taken aback and hesitant. David replied, “Sure, we’re free, that’ll be great.” After more back-and-forth David and I found that they would be arriving late on Friday and have a rental car, so they wanted to get together first thing Saturday. Meanwhile, I kept texting Shannon separately and had a few calls with her. In among all the social talk, we got talking about sex. Eventually, I adjusted my approach from what I proposed before, me fucking Joe or us having a threesome. Rather than asking Shannon if she wanted to make out with me, I instead asked if she would do me a favor and touch me again. I asked not if she would mind, but if Joe would object. She surprised me by saying with some enthusiasm that Joe would like her and me to do that. She quickly clarified that he would like to see us do that. OK, the question is how far would Shannon go with me? I was happy to get that far and left it open from there. Saturday Long story short, David and I met Shannon and Joe at their hotel Saturday morning and visited a few places in town around their hotel. We eventually went to their hotel for lunch, then they invited us back to their room to browse some things on the internet and talk about our plans for later. David surprisingly and suddenly looked at his phone and said that he had to go into the office to take care of things. Something he rarely had to do, at least never in the office on a weekend. But I didn’t question it. He apologized and asked if it was ok if he came back in a few hours to the hotel. OK. He said that he would call when he was leaving the office. Later I found out that it was a set up between him and Shannon. Long foreplay story short, Shannon ended up naked on her back, I was in just my t-shirt braless on all fours licking her pussy, sending her into orbit and Joe was playing with himself. While she was in an out-of-her-mind state, I asked Shannon if Joe could put it in me. She squeaked “Yes,” and I ordered him to get over here. Now I was feeling the dick I had anticipated for so long. He came pretty quickly, but I was just as quick. His ejaculation was fantastic for me. Shannon snapped out of her ecstasy when Joe and I simultaneously started our cris d'amour. Afterwards Shannon wasn’t shy about going down on my sloppy pussy to give me another O. I was also happy that both Joe and Shannon found me to their liking. After our two hours or so of fun, I had Shannon call David and asked him when he was coming back to the hotel. I thought I was being clever having Shannon call him. But David is more clever (cleverer?) and more thoughtful; he had managed to get the hotel to reserve us an adjoining room next to Joe and Shannon’s shortly after they made their reservation - just in case things moved in a direction where we needed it. He checked in on the way back and David and I went next door into our room to shower before going out again. It was a tense late afternoon and light dinner. Not that anything was wrong, but it was a sexually charged atmosphere. David quietly but clearly sent me the message that knew exactly what had happened, had expected it. He also left the door between the rooms ajar as a signal that there was an intimacy between us couples, and negative proof that he wasn’t doing anything with me, the potential was being saved for later. It was clear to me that Shannon was interested in David. And no one had to tell David that. As we left the hotel and began to walk down the block David took Shannon’s hand. I grabbed Joe’s hand. Shannon had previously told me at one point during our text and email exchanges that Joe, knowing only a small part of her past but knowing that it is still much greater than his, likes saying that she was a slut when they’re in foreplay and having sex. He stresses it and says it repeatedly and asks her for stories about her past. It disturbed her at first but it she says it’s all ok, it makes him closer and more loving than ever, even after the sex is over. When we got back to the hotel we went to our rooms and had sex. Pretty wild, but nothing that hasn’t been discussed here before. David and I expected that we would separate into the two rooms, but Joe insisted on us all staying in their room because it had two queen beds instead of one king. He wanted to see his wife having sex with another man, something he said that he had never seen before and expected only to ever see in his fantasies about Shannon’s past. But here David was, with all his pent-up energy, doing a good job on Shannon. David is much more in tune with what was going on in Joe’s mind and how to play it. He knew that what Joe thought wasn’t that Shannon is a slut, it’s that she was a slut and he is the one who was so good for her that she gave up whoring around for him. He prides himself on having an oversexed woman who he has tamed and married. Her past is a point of pride for him. She previously told me that she fucked a lot of different guys and did all these different things (MFM and FFM threesomes, anal, couples swaps) before and yet she is satisfied, happy with Joe. For Joe, it is part of her great personality, but he is so proud that she gave it up for him. David flattered him by saying that he wished that I could have been as sexually adventuresome as Shannon was, that I had only fucked one other guy when we met. David told Joe that Joe married the town slut, but now she is his. Joe really liked that. I suppose that this shouldn’t be so surprising, there are people here, mostly guys, who say that they don’t mind that their wife sluts around (with a boyfriend, at the club, at a party) because, especially because, she is going home with him tonight. The husband getting the final conquest, and all is well. In a moment of calm, nonsexual honesty I asked Joe if he was ok, if it disturbed him knowing and seeing Shannon having sex with David (or me). He seemed good, more than good – pleased, with Shannon’s past but only because it was in the past. He confirmed that talking about her past in the abstract was exciting, something he loved about her, but seeing the reality of her having sex with another guy was painful. “But that seems to be the price of admission,” he said. I was left wondering but didn’t push him on it. “It’s wonderful afterwards though,” he said. Shannon confessed that they weren’t in town to visit relatives. They contacted us and specifically came to visit our place in the world to see if we said we wanted to meet up. They had reserved the entire weekend for time with us, whatever it may be, and had a flight home on Monday afternoon. What led to this trip was Shannon “confronting” Joe about me and asking him if he would fuck if me if she could arrange it. (She already had the signal from me at our last meeting that she could.) What I didn’t know was that she and David were talking behind my back to set this up. Sunday The big day came and we took Joe and Shannon back to our house to meet the rest of our family: Red, Clair, Lora, and our multitude of children. The introductions were very smooth and cordial. The only awkward part for me was when Clair and Lora both said to Joe and Shannon how much I had said about them, but Joe and Shannon were untroubled by me having talked about them. Shannon said I hadn’t said anything about Clair, Lora, Red, or all these kids to her. They were curious about the provenance of the kids and we proudly pointed out the biological parentage of each (Lora said “I’m the mother of the brown ones.”). To say they were amazed with the whole situation would be an understatement. Especially with the huge house, guesthouse and all the children. We told them that none of it (the house, the number of children) is as impressive as it seems if you divide it up among us five adults. David has arranged with Becky and Frank to take our children for the day. We had also arranged for two of the regular young women we use as babysitters to accompany them to help out. It worked out great and we really appreciated it. Needless to say, we all played. The interesting thing for me was that the pairings that seemed to grab hold the most were Joe and Lora, and Shannon and Red. David, my husband, and I played together with Clair and laughed that the couple he had set up for me to have sex with had found other sexual interests. 😊 To Joe, it became not that Shannon just was a slut, but is one, fucking both David and now Red. David and Red now will call Shannon a whore in front of Joe, while the other is fucking her, or both are. Even when Joe is making love to Shannon, his wife. I was worried that this was going too far, but Joe smiled. Both Red and David know how to make him feel good about his wife, portraying her as a sophisticated, super sexually charged woman that he was lucky to get to be his wife. Tamed but not domesticated. After all this, I was afraid what the aftermath might be. But we met at dinner and everyone was happy. It was almost odd that we talked about everything except sex. But it also seemed so natural that it was no problem. One last thing to report: we had breakfast with Shannon and Joe at the hotel Monday (Labor Day) morning for breakfast before they had to go to the airport. Unlike our other get togethers outside the bedroom, this time we did talk about sex and it was mutually decided that David and Shannon would go back to the room for a quick one. Joe and I agreed that it was wonderful sitting here together, him fingering my pussy and reaching for my braless tits, knowing what our spouses were doing. The psychological aspects of what happened excite me as much as the sex, mostly because that’s what I keep thinking about. 1) My husband David went behind my back with another woman(!) to really move along the opportunity for us to play with them. Plus getting the adjoining hotel room and arranging babysitting. 2) Red and Shannon really hit it off, sexually and otherwise, something that I did not expect, they’re so different. Same with Joe and Lora. 3) The fact that Joe has such a fetish about Shannon being called a slut. And that David picked up on the subtle clues early on and had the right instincts on which direction and how far to push it. Joe gets so worked up having Red and David say so and hearing her tell stories about a past that he didn’t know that she had. He went from slut-fear to slut-pride in a very short time. Anyway, overall an amazing weekend.

Between the byob swing clubs and the houseparties we have seen some seriously inebriated Lifestylers. Don't be that couple!

We make it a point to drink very lightly at parties. Our go to drink is a white wine spritzer, meaning a little wine mixed in with some sparkling water in a tall ice-filled glass. It allows for the shared experience aspect of drinking while allowing for how "light" the pour, and the pour gets lighter with each subsequent prep. https://www.thespruceeats.com/white-wine-spritzer-759850 Experienced LS folks will generally agree that as experience accumulates, people ratchet down the amount of alcohol they bring and especially how much they consume. People who attend house parties typically need little (if any) of the social lubrication aspects of alcohol. They attend to have fun. Booze tends to dull that fun, not enhance it.

Earlier this week my wife said something to me after returning from a quickie with one of our play couples. As we were going to bed, she came on to me. I thought, as I always do when she does this, that she is being generous in offering herself to me. I said that we don't have to. Daniela said, "Regardless of what I've done earlier, I'm not satisfied until we screw." I was surprised and touched.

Firstly, finding swing partners at a non-swinging resort is a very low probability event. (Except for single males, they're everywhere.) But more importantly, if your wife isn't enthusiastic about it, it shouldn't happen. Pushing her into a LifeStyle encounter is likely to damage your relationship.

8-10 couples=16-20 people. Ask them in advance to think of two facts and a lie (or two lies and a fact) about themselves. Once everyone arrives, have each in turn announce their names and recite the three items in any order they choose. for example, "My name is John" 1. I lost my virginity to a MILF. 2. My first trip to a nude beach was with my parents 3. My sister and her husband are also swingers "My name is Sally" 1. I worked as a nude model to help pay for college 2. I met my husband at the high school senior prom 3. I'm a beta tester for Liberator.com, the sex furniture company. Give each couple a writing instrument and something to write on. They'll decide who they want to learn more about.

ExploringOptions; Guess what? You're in a WONDERFUL place! Terrified? Excited? Jumble of nerves? Turned on? All of this can be exquisite. It's a bit like the first date you ever had in your life, the first time a young man touched you, the first time you kissed. You aren't stupid asking anything! That's one of the reasons this forum exists! My wife and I would not have gotten into swinging without this forum and its ability to answer so many questions, even questions we didn't think of and questions we couldn't quite articulate. It's true with swinging there isn't a pretense of romance. But, there's still a pretense of courtship if that makes sense. You've already been doing that with this other couple. You're finding common ground, talking, getting to know each other, seeing if there is attraction, seeing if there is compatibility. That's all part of the "vanilla dating" (what swingers call regular, non-swinging dating) too. Now, that's not to say that romance can't be felt. I remember reading a post here from a woman who talked about her first ever swinging experience. For her, it was very definitely making love, and she very much enjoyed it like that. That's a whole area of understanding. Some swingers approach it as "Hi! Let's go fuck!" and off they go and bam-bam-bam. Some approach it more akin to dating. There's no 'wrong' answer; the right answer is what works for you and your husband. There's no mold you're supposed to fit here. Be you. Swinging can feel quite awkward at first. Your whole upbringing, all of society tries very hard to teach us that monogamous relationships are the end-all-be-all, and anything else is socially criminal. We're not given the tools to understand what non-monogamy looks like, how to think of it, embrace it, feel it, understand it. As a result, it can be absolutely terrifying to approach it because it's such an unknown. You're on this journey with your husband. Keep the communication between the two of you absolutely open, and always make it a journey you're on together. Do that, and how any evening works out will always end with you and your husband in each other's arms both physically and emotionally. You're the team. I don't think you need to find someone more experienced. I think you've already found the right couple based on what you've said. Ok, they're new too. That can make things awkward, but it can also add a lot of spice. When you get together for more than just dinner and talking, there will be some point where there will be an ice breaker. I can't tell you what that ice breaker is. My wife and I had an MFM with a guy who was a bit nervous on how to move forward, so I started things off by unzipping her dress. It can be being at a club, and trading partners on a dance floor. It can be at dinner, where wife A sits with husband B on the same side of the table, and physical proximity ignites things. From what you've posted, it feels like the wife in the other couple may be the one to break the ice. But, once the ice is broken I think everyone will start moving forward. As terrified as you are, it might be you that breaks the ice. It can be as simple as you hugging the other husband, and doing it as a physically intimate hug as opposed to a hug you give a friend. You know the type of hug...where you press your breasts against him, move your hips into him. There's all sorts of ways to do this, and they're all essentially the same as how you break the ice on a vanilla date. Don't be surprised if you're still terrified after the date that gets things going physically. It took some time for my wife and I to feel like doing this was 'normal'. Not that we didn't want it to be exciting, but that we felt comfortable enough to be at ease. It's all new. This is normal. Just remember; doing this doesn't mean you love your husband less or he loves you less. Rather the opposite! You are both enjoying an incredible new experience that you couldn't be doing if you didn't love each other so much. You have probably already felt that these first few steps on this journey together has already brought you closer. Swinging, in a couple that is already in love, usually magnifies that love. Seems paradoxical but it is true. I hope you have a wonderful time tonight! Let us know how it goes!

I left my terror feelings at the door and it followed me in. Meeting a couple that will work with your fears is what is needed. You are now on equal ground with another couple opening up to their fears. Jokes and laughing takes away the fear that every new situation brings not only sexual situations. You will always remember the first time you meet, your meeting was a success without sex, you made friends.

I think one of the perks of the Lifestyle is the freedom to experiment with people and situations outside your norm. Be adventurous. Push your boundaries. Usually you find there was nothing to be afraid of. Was the movie "Poor Things"?

I'm still around. Surprised anyone still remembers me. I might not post as much as I used to, but I do read the forums occasionally.

The couple has a right to have sex with whomever they want and even make porn. No one is trying to put them in jail for it. Their employer has a right to decide they don't want open pornographers working for them. Free speech means the government does not put you in jail. It does not mean you are free from the consequences of your actions.

An elderly couple planned to get married. They were discussing joint bank accounts, bed size, etc. The man asked the woman how often she wanted to have sex. She said infrequently. He said is that one word or two?

William , before I respond to your question, I must ask ,Your profile says Glasgow , is that UK or somewhere in the US? We started later than some of the others. We were in our 60's. We married later in life, and it was not until then that the last of our children had moved on. We had always been of the mindset of there being a time for every purpose and up until that point the purpose was seeing them off into the world. We had always maintained an active sex life between us and had , early on, gotten into the habit of reserving time for just the two of us to do things together outside of the home. We realized that having offspring around was only a temporary thing. When we had the empty nest the questions were : What's next? Why not? There were some personal elements for me as well, but I have addressed them in other posts. For the two of us it was adventure. Because of our longer time together, right around 30 years, and our ages we did not have many of the issues some face. We knew each other and had a bedrock surety in our relationship.

Hate to be a skeptic, but this seems really fake and based on the OP’s replies, seems to me it was posted just for their own amusement. I could be wrong though.

Going over the ground rules with everyone involved is crucial and if you don't go over the rules this is what will happen. One problem I first saw was that you admitted that both of you were half buzzed, bad idea. Next, are you sure she was an anal virgin, maybe she has done it before? Anyway it happened, now what to do about it. I think both should stop until you both get on the same page with your rules. This is not uncommon, I have really seen problems about going bareback or ejaculating inside her. Having rules and sticking to them is important and later down the road you may adjust your rules. Talk this out and don't let this get between you, but don't swap until your rules are agreed upon by both!

About 10 years ago we swapped with friends one time before we were married. We didn't even know about swinging. Six years ago my wife secret.y set up a swinging date with friends,I didn't even know that she was interested.everything went great and since we have had over 50 encounters. Each time got better as we gained experience. Last week we were swinging with a new couple, they will be visiting us again this week. We'll be teaching them. Swinging is fun. No experience necessary.

Step 2 for us happened last night that went the way the 4 us planned without sex. We met the same ones again for a very nice dinner and more talk about sex and swinging and the reasons we want to swing again what we want to do our histories of sex and still laughed about all things stupid we did. Meeting them this time we had no intentions to have sex last night it was just to get together like any friend for a nice night out because they have a child and a babysitter that needed to get home by 11:00. With no sex planned the big question is when we would do it they still haven’t left us meaning they enjoyed being with us and we enjoyed them we weren’t strangers anymore going to meet for sex. She was the most talkative about sex the guys just laughed at two sexual women opening up with real sex talk. When she said she wants to fuck both of us we knew we had to get over whatever was hold us back they were the perfect match for us. Step 3 will be tonight at their place she will get her mom to watch their kid for the night and we won’t have any interruptions for our plans that she no longer wants to be curious about us she plans to break the barriers. Now we are excited and have to wait all day to do this being less terrified still not knowing how it will go I need her to push this for me.

Relieved. I’m relieved, they are relieved. An hour before we were going to meet I got a text, can we talk? Followed by a call. She said they didn’t want to ghost us, they are having second thoughts. I burst out Thank You. I told her how terrified I was, I was still convincing myself that it would be fine. After exposing our fears she said they would still want to meet us just not for “you know”. 90 minutes later we met them at restaurant bar. Relieved. They looked better in IRL. Pictures were current. Conversation started slow with the men quiet, I tried to talk normal shit. I didn’t know how to start sex talk, when it did we tried to keep the talk low so nobody would hear us. Once we started the talk became funny and the men warmed up. It’s hard to say why we want to meet to others, I’m still asking myself. We all had sex stories to share finally leading what we would do if we did do it. Kissing, oral, condoms, we both are on the same bc. It was easy for me to admit sexual things I never told anyone, she was going head to head with her past. The guys weren’t as open they just laughed. Three drinks in I think I asked if he still wants to fuck me, she asked the same of us. Both guys said a big YES. No sex yet, we plan to meet and try this again. On the drive home I felt better and said if we met someone experienced we would like be swingers now. He asked me if would feel better that way. I was happy to know our new contact were very much like us, terrified and now relieved. We will find out if they liked us as much as we enjoyed our meet. I also know I will still be terrified if we make plans, and I am sure she will be too. Our adventure is to be continued. I’m sorry to disappoint anyone hoping for juicy graphic post.

We STRONGLY recommend that you don't ever play with people who aren't already in the L/S. You need to have the mindset that sex isn't love and love isn't sex and all too often, 'vanilla' friends don't understand this. They can't keep the two separated and that leads to problems. How do we know? Ms. Gold and her ex tried swinging to save their failing marriage and decided to hook up with their close friends. A hot tub, some alcohol, and the swim suits came off and...pretty soon the other couples husband was offering to leave his wife for Ms. Gold. Only problem was that Ms. Gold wasn't interested in having a relationship with him, especially since he was married to one of her best friends. The wife quickly found out his plan and that was the end of the friendship and seriously damaged the other couples relationship...but that wasn't the end. All of the juicy details came out as to what they were all doing to their other friends and family leading to many awkward meetings. Lets just say it wasn't pretty and more than just embarrassing for everyone. Most swingers don't want to be found out by their vanilla friends...why would you invite a vanilla friend to find out. Also, just because he may joke and ask about something (that he most likely thinks will never happen), doesn't mean that he would actually be interested in it if he was given the opportunity. Best to keep the two worlds separate and not take the risk...

If they’re close enough, meet ‘em for drinks and dinner. If you hit off, you’ll get to play with a younger couple. If you don’t hit it off, you’ll still get drinks and dinner. 😉

You understand my feelings on this. I posted many times about my first time with a new lover when I can’t believe I gave him my whole body even though we just met and I never did anything like it before. I am positive that if my husband was with us that night the experience would not have been the same. All these years later I wonder why I was able to go alone with a man we just met. We aren’t big swingers, we don’t go looking for others, we have played with a very limited number of others. Group sex is even more limited, the number of times I watched or even been in the same room as my husband playing with another woman even more limited. Like you I do have jealous feelings watching him and a sense of pride when I see him satisfy a partner. I love the feeling of being with the right man, I’m not addicted to it.

First, welcome to the board. You'll get all sorts of feedback here. You have already done one important thing, and that is to keep the lines of communication wide open. There are several prompts that might be worth both of you taking the time to reflect and discuss. 1. What foundational values do we share? What is the basis for our relationship? 2. Do we think our relationship is strong and getting stronger because we can talk about these issues? Or so we think our relationship is getting weaker, and these discussions are a symptom of uncertainty or fear? 3. Where, precisely, does intimacy fit into our relationship? 4. How do we conceive of monogamy? Is it a fence that keeps others out? A fence that holds us together? How would we conceive of a gap in that fence? A breach, a gate, a portal to an unknown?

This is just a big THANK YOU to our members who are diligent in tagging messages as SPAM. This immediately removes those messages from view and send them to your moderators for proper disposition. The sooner they are hidden from view the better the list reads.

My posting took a strange direction. NO RAPE FANTASY!!! I wasn’t looking for anything close to be called rape, real or fantasy. Don’t be offended, I looked for a hard fuck, a different fuck, an exciting experience with a new man and going further outside my real me with a woman. In the movie she was a prostitute having random sex. I’m not a prostitute I just wanted random exciting sex. My husband is wonderful talking about how we can go outside our norms. Our meeting is for sex not for friendship. I was attracted to a look that is not a look I usually am attracted to. Last night things went fast with very little getting to know time. I was not the usual me, I didn’t care. Fifteen minutes after meeting I was ready. I was open telling him I wanted hard and aggressive. My husband and the wife wanted watch both nude. He lived up to my wants not my expectations. I wanted to howl like in the movies, I didn’t. He kept going about 10 minutes of very hard thrusting, I enjoyed up to the time he ran out of steam. I can tell he sensed I was completely satisfied, asking if I enjoyed. Then the lookers got busy my husband slightly more aggressive from our normal. I am not a voyeur or an exhibitionist, it is still normalizing the new lifestyle. Step 2, I wanted her to take me orally as they did in the movie. She got me. I felt I needed to reciprocate. I felt like I did it right by the way she responded. Rest time, small talk and one more time. This time, all four of us on the bed with Ladies Up. Cowgirls, this time I was the controller and this time very satisfied. Hard aggressive was fun if not great, it was different, something that we all wanted. Every person is different, the reason for us to meet others.

Poor Things with Emma Stone Worried adds excitement to the unknown every time we meet anyone new. We are still getting used to initial flutters, our first time having sex, just getting naked took time adding to the excitement. I figure most people looking on a swingers site are more hardcore, we are still newbies, our first was only months ago. I want restrained aggressiveness, not painful, pleasurably aggressive. We are married six years with half during the pandemic, plenty of role play. We had many laughs about the Amazon delivery knew about packages. My husband can be aggressive sexually and very satisfying in a predictable way. That sounds bad, it’s not. He is also an avid gym goer who looks at asses on the elliptical and enjoys telling me about it. He also tells me about some real gym rats that would “fuck me good”. We are open about wants and sexy talk, he knows because I told him about my feelings with the few we met. The excitement of newness and the unknown. FaceTime with the woman has gotten me even more wanting to meet. I think she won’t be afraid that something extra I want. Please have the reality meet the anticipation.

Early on we met a Lesbian couple that were friends of friends. At first I thought it strange that lesbians still wanted to play with men then I thought deeper and thought why wouldn’t they. The women are married, have a great marriage from what I see and are fun to be with. At a recent house party they were the life of the party, very open about their sexuality and let it be know they were there for penis. I thought they would want to play with women too and then one in a nice way said she just wanted penis and reminded me she has pussy all the time. It wasn’t a negative comment it was funny when she joked she only wanted to borrow Rocky cocky for a half hour On our way home Rocky said that both of women were some of the most fun people we have met and I had to agree.

There are posts here about couples who have a "No Kissing" rule. I've realized that I enjoy seeing kissing, as deep as they want. Any others? Kissing isn't sex, but it makes it more intense and passionate, something I like doing and seeing.

Hi. I typed a reply, but it seems to have disappeared. 😂. It was very much a group effort. Not a threesome. We had discussed where we could cum early in the encounter. From start to finish, it was about 30ish minutes. Not super long, but super fun! it was the neighbors wife that gave me a BJ, while my wife and her husband danced and made out. The girls each came twice. Then it was the boys turn. I came in my wife, while the neighbor was giving her husband oral, and she was rubbing my balls. I came in my wife, while the neighbor stroked it out of her husband on my wife’s chest. there are ZERO regrets. We sat and talked and drank for 2 hours afterwards. This morning, my wife and I agreed that it was a lot of fun!!

Repeat the mantra, "women run the LS". They make all of the decisions and have absolute veto power.

A woman wearing her wedding ring while playing with someone other than her husband 🥵

In short, my answer is no. I have a friend from High School that I used to be close to, then we grew apart and recently resumed a relationship with (albeit somewhat superficial). Apparently he is in the LS and has had a number of experiences with his ex-wife. He's asked me to help set him and his current GF up with some of our friends but I've resisted completely. Who you refer is a reflection on you and, despite liking him, I know he and his GF are headcases, super jealous and a bit reckless. It would probably be fine, but my wife is temperamental about the LS as is and the last thing I want is to create issues with the friends we actually still have a relationship going with.

I saw an article in the NY Times today written by the daughter of Ronald Reagan about Sandra Day O'Connor. A few paragraphs went into the struggle that Justice Day had with her husband John's Alzheimer's dementia and how she faced it. Quoting: "Sandra Day O’Connor Told a Truth About Marriage That Few Others Dared To By Patti Davis My father [Ronald Reagan] had died two years before, and during the decade of his illness, I paid close attention to what other people chose to share about Alzheimer’s. There was a notable silence about placing a family member in a facility designed to provide safe, appropriate care. I so admired Sandra Day O’Connor’s openness, and I imagined the thousands of people in similar situations who felt gratitude that someone was shining a light on a dilemma that so many suffer through in the shadows. In 2007, she went even further, allowing her son Scott to disclose that John had fallen in love with a resident at the facility — and that he did so with the former justice’s blessing. In an interview with KPNX-TV, a Phoenix station, Scott described how his mother would watch John and his new partner sitting on a bench together, clearly smitten with each other. “Mom was thrilled that Dad was relaxed and happy and comfortable living here.” She continued to visit him, though he no longer recognized her. People with Alzheimer’s lose connections, memories become frayed threads, but the desire for companionship runs deep — deeper than the disease. It’s fairly common for patients to develop new romantic, even sexual, relationships. But it’s something that few people feel comfortable talking about." This makes me proud to say that I am polyamorous. Although it was very late in life, this showed a wife's genuine love for her husband. It would have been so easy for her to do what everyone would have expected, pulled him out out of the facility and raised a lot of fuss and drama. But she didn't, she responded with love.

I had what is now called a hotwife in my twenties, participated very briefly in foursome activities in my thirties, and my 2nd wife and I enthusiastically took up swinging in our early 50's through our sixties. The best time to be swinging: Now! If you (and your significant other, if you have one,) are excited about sharing yourself with other people, then you'll have fun no matter what age you are. Can you do stuff longer and more acrobaticly when you're young? Of course! On the other hand, as you age your experience allows you to appreciate what you're into more and more.

I've never been asked this, but before I met my wife a younger man asked her if she would have sex with him. She used to babysit him when she was in her 20's. Now she was in her late 30's and him in his early 20's and he told her that he always had a crush on her and now that he was an adult was hoping that it was a possibility. She kept him around as a FWB for a while. I met him recently at a funeral for one of his family members. Nice guy. I can see why she kept him around for booty calls. So, she did "help him out" and it ended-up being pretty good.

I never thought this is degrading or thought someone doing it is degrading me. Possibly some men do it as their way of showing power, I always looked at it as another playful act. So many years ago the first time a boyfriend did it I took it as a respectful thing. We both laughed afterwards when he apologized. I have a vivid memory of what happened, he was in my mouth and pulled out and used his own hand to finish. He said he didn’t want to cum in my mouth so I thanked him and gave him the biggest kiss with all that still on my face. I never told him that he wouldn’t be the first that didn’t pull out. I don’t feel degraded most of the time, at my age if I thought a partner was trying to degrade me I would throw him the F out. I find it funny to watch it cum out. I’ve had other things squirted on me in fun. So many things men do can be classified degrading if you allow it to get to you. I have a friend that says anal sex is degrading so for her it is and she shouldn’t allow it. Spanking during sex is exciting not degrading. When a friend asks me why I let him do something my standard answer is if I didn’t like it I wouldn’t do it. At my age I’m there for the laughs and giggles.

Do others have that One Special friend in the lifestyle that you play with? We decided sex with others could and would be fun, sex with no attachment to enjoy sex and new sexual adventures. Our marriage is secure and our love has never waned before or after our active summer. My husband had a limited sex life before me, a thing he hates me repeating. I was not overly sexual before just more active. We discussed before joining a site that we should experience more sexual variety. How can I be his best if he had very little to compare even if I end up not being the best. If the better is out there I want him to enjoy. Truth I also wanted sex for sex with no pretense of love or relationship. Now the summer of exploration is over that led us to a relationship with the original find. No promises of just them or just us for them, we aren’t forming a poly family we are going to enjoy the special feeling we have for them. Do others have that special relationship?

We have been dating one other couple for over 10 years and just in the last year they moved further away. We still see each other...once in a great while, but are thinking it may be time to find to find another couple or couples and form a small group. With Covid and how difficult (but totally worth the difficulty) it was to find that elusive spark for all involved, we have had a hard time getting started again.

We are having so much fun with new people we met only because we took the jump. I told a friend about this game and she said she was going to the store to buy the screws and nuts for another party with six couples. After some swimming, barbecue and drinking they announced the game and took out two bags of the fasteners. They were laughing as the guys chose their screws and we picked nuts. It’s fun picking guys nuts. Then the fun began matching who was screwing who this with a catch. They set it that one screw can fit two nuts sometimes, or two screws fit one nut. This set up four groups of three. By chance one guy had a screw that fit mine and another female friend. Each group was given an hour to play before we all stopped for laughs together. All the fasteners returned to the bags for a second round where I ended with my husband and an another guy. Thank you AdamGunn for the suggestion and our friend that added a twist. I report that it was successful and so much fun.

It was interesting, a huge party, over 150 people. We watched and mingled only, keeping drinking to a minimum. We did see all the drunk people we were warned about! But what an experience! We'd definitely go to another, with less nerves next time.

Thanks for all the advice and nice thoughts that registered with us when we met our new besties. I never thought my husband would love me less if we joined a swinging site, I thought it meant he loved me more and I loved him more than ever. Everyone says that looks don’t count, it did and does for us. When looking I looked for what I called hot looking wives before looking at hot husbands. My husband said about a choice I found that the husband is not good enough, all based on looks. We agreed we wanted to meet the best out there. Unlike many men on here my husband is not showing me off or even has the big desire to watch me. I’ll take that back, he watched the first part of the night. All done in fun I stopped things just as they got sexually started with two horny husbands watching two wild women. I wanted to watch me too. We all agreed to chronicle as one poster suggested by letting the men use their phones to record the fun of those wild women. I wish they recorded the very first laugh we had. I say I was seduced by the best seducer we could have found. It is said every woman remembers her first, this first is much more memorable for me. I watched the video, I will say it was more fun when it happened. Watching yourself is like listening to yourself, hard to believe it’s you. The proof things went well is that the day after, today the funny texts went on all day between me and my “bi lover” lol. She asked if I am still looking for others, she volunteered to search together then added only if we can all meet.

Excited and Terrified many times in my life like going skiing, on coasters, watching movies and so many other times. I was terrified watching Debbie the first time with our friend and equally excited. I was more excited the first time having sex as a teen, too excited embarrassingly, yet terrified that I knocked her up. You asked do I just spread my legs, yes. Let her please you, just enjoy. I bet you have pleased past boyfriends and your husband that way and hoping you spread your legs for those partners. I’m still excited when Debbie spreads enjoying me eating her while she screams and jerks. I bet you will forget who is between your legs if it feels good. Get your adrenaline going and take in the excitement as the terrifying thoughts melt away. Now you have to deal with the others getting over fears of swinging.

I wonder if you're not putting too much pressure on yourself. I don't mean this as a slight, but maybe you just need to lighten up. We like to look at these adventures as just that, adventures. We also try to be playful, laugh, giggle, be okay with being uncomfortable and even awkward. If you are both new to this, then all the better. Be weird, clumsy, and nervous together as a group. I might suggest that your first meet up include other activities not specifically focused on getting naked in bed. We have gone to restaurants and flirted, girls without panties, traded partners and touched each other under the table. We've been to nude beaches or private hot tubs. We've gone to clubs and partied with a lot of added sexual tension. We've been to art openings, flirted, looked at art, traded time with each others spouse, kissed each other knowing that we couldn't have sex in the studio but might later on. It is a real turn on as a married couple to be kissing two women/men in public. It was a build up, but offered an opportunity to test the waters and spark the juices. I remember one time when it was my wife, a single guy and myself (MFM) at a club. We were dancing, touching, really being sexy on the dance floor. She was kissing both of us. Guys in the crowd were like, WTF. Trying to approach her, but she would tell them she was with us. That she was going to fuck us both later. The looks on the others faces was priceless. But the point is we were having sexy fun. Enjoying ourselves. Some of these evenings ended without any 'sex' and they were still a blast. If you're kind, honest, open and respectful you really can't go wrong. Have fun...

Yes, but the word we choose to use is "excited" Once again, think of it as excited and not terrified. One is a thrilling experience and the other is frightening. Absolutely...as you found out. This is why we always recommend that the first meeting be for drinks or dinner with both couples knowing that playing is not on the board. It takes the pressure off and lets everyone get the chance to just get to know each other. Afterwards, both couples can then decide if there will be a second meeting where things may (or may not) happen. Definitely takes the 'terrifying' and pressure out of the equation. This is something that we have always been surprised about...we are all there because we are interested in sex, yet all too often, nobody wants to bring it up. This is one of the more 'fun' thing we enjoy about swinging...being able to openly talk about sex with others. Yet, all too often, even though we are meeting another potential couple, they steer away from talking about sex (even though we keep trying to steer things back that direction). Meetings will become easier and you will both become more comfortable as you get used to doing them. We were the same way when we started, then realized that almost everyone feels the same when they started as well. It's all part of the adventure that the two of you have undertaken. Enjoy the ride as well as the destination...

OH! When I saw that the title of this thread is “Fist Time”, I thought it was going in a comPLETEly different direction! 😂

Many swingers don’t understand that being alone with a sexual partner is one of most pleasurable activities for me. It is difficult for me to fully enjoy my partner if anyone including my husband is watching. Watching him with a woman has become a bit easier, not something I find myself needing to do.

I got a call from the widower this morning asking if I would meet him again tonight. Saturday night I with Michael with me told him I didn’t want a long term relationship with him, that I would be with him just that one time and that the reason I was on AM was just for that reason, nothing long term. He understood my reasoning, his joining that site was for the same reason, no long term complicated troubles. I have nothing negative to report on my time with him, quite the opposite it was a lovely time, almost perfect. I told him the only way I would meet again is if Michael can watch, they already met Saturday with just a checking out time. I assured him Michael is straight and not weird, he just likes to watch or if everyone agrees he will join.

I met another sexual partner on AM who was a perfect gentleman and registered his profile for another not typical reason, he is a widower. His wife died a few years ago from medical complications after a 25 year happy, monogamous marriage. It took him some time to re-enter the dating scene, meeting primarily divorcees who were looking for relationships, something he wasn’t interested in. He was honest in telling me he slept with a few of the women he met but they all became too needy. He joined Ashley though it is not cheap for men because he wanted to be with women that had no relationship expectations and were open to be their sexual selves. I was explicit with him that I am married and a swinger that is not cheating and wanted him to meet Michael before doing what we both wanted. I am pretty sure he thought I was an escort and Michael was my pimp even when we assured him I wasn’t looking for anything more.