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Showing content with the highest reputation on 03/28/2024 in all areas
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1 pointI didn't get it for a long time. I still don't fully understand it. The choking thing is really not my thing even though my GF loves it. I don't understand the appeal there. Even hair pulling sounds painful but my GF says that when it happens during sex it's not as painful for her. She loses certain painful sensations that actual arouse her during sex. If you pull her hair during sex she loves it. If you pull it outside of sex play or initiating sex play she'll punch you in the face.
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1 pointSeveral years back my GF made a homemade amateur porn video for fun with a guy she knew from college. It was a fantasy thing that he wanted to do so she obliged and I was fine with it so long as I get a copy (I enjoy seeing her on video and pictures when I'm not there for the action). So the video was kind of set up like a casting couch type of scene. I'm expecting a 15 or 20 minute video but it ends up being 2 hours. The first 30 minutes is just an interview. Starts with some innocent questions and then goes into her sexual history all the way up until that day. Some of the stuff she said I thought was fake for the video but she told me it was all real. It was kind of hot to see her sit there and be interviewed like that. Even though I knew there was sex coming up in the video I was still intrigued by the interview.
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1 pointI do it all the time … but it’s due to modern pharmaceuticals. I’m on a med named Silodosin to treat BPH (enlarging prostate). One of the possible side effects — and I have it — is called retrograde ejaculation. Rather than being ejaculated out, the semen runs back into the bladder and you just wind up getting rid of it when you pee. So unlike those men who wish they could hold it back, I actually wish I could still “shoot”.
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1 pointFor David and me, it was pretty simple. He said, didn't ask, "You're still sleeping with Red." I thought this was our breakup. Then he said, "I want you to know that I'm ok with it." Not long after, David said we should marry. We did and Red came along for the ride. Our relationships weren't planned in advance, but worked out. That's why I believe it's better to go into a relationship as ENM, not trying to pry open a monogamous one.
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1 pointsorry for the long read. I have a little different take…..or two cents of advice. It is the same we’ve shared with couples and singles for the past two plus decades. first, admittedly open, honest…..revealing discussion between two people in a relationship….long or short term is at best challenging, fearful and with many stumbling blocks and pitfalls. Even the best of relationships has a great amount of difficulty “baring their soul” conversation with their SO/lover/best friend/soulmate. Especially when feelings, desires, wants, needs are involved. Ten times that when it involves intimacy….sex…..and the fear of hurting that special person. We have found a gradual step by step elevation of conversation….direct….not sugar coated….not camouflaged with half hearted “fishing” statements/questions and certainly never by demands or statements of “or else”, “got to have” or “I deserve”. After all you are a couple, a team….the two of you against the world. This should be an open conversation, not limited by time, casual about the both of you. An extra, something exciting/pleasurable for you both….with equal interest and a casual easy simple first step. Do not cloud it with Multiple “firsts” or directly jumping in with both feet into the deep end. The Open Couple/Lifestyle/Ethical Non Monogamy is very broad. It covers experiences….shared experiences….that could fill the Grand Canyon. It does not define you it is just another branch of your life you share together. My best image is think of it as a great tree. A mighty Oak, Maple or Beech Tree. A strong thick trunk with many deep roots, this is your relationship base. From this to many branch’s stretching in every direction with many more branches that finger out from that. Each with smaller branches that finger out even further, always growing. All tipped with clusters of leave for each life experience with new buds renewing those experiences. You grow and share together, as one, with many experiences in all aspects of your life together. Alternate lifestyle is all inclusive. There are so many possibilities. From art, music, travel, food etc etc. Then there is also more intimate discoveries, personal, open and shared. From adult social activities (clothed/non sexual, think dirty dancing/self expression), nudism, social mingling, lifestyle/ENM social but only the two of you (enjoying the social energy but only as a couple, just you two), same room play/sex between you two but in a room with other couples (voyeur) watching/being watched, playful touching with others, couples soft swap/soft swing (oral/manual only), from here the possibilities are endless only limited by your imagination and mutual agreement only limitations are the limits you both agree together. You move forward as a couple, open conversation both agreeable before participation. Like. New born you learn to move (communicate with each other), crawl, walk, run and race. You both decide next steps/experiences together equally. I would advise the communication/comfort level for you both, small steps, small experiences shared together. Then openly talk after for any advancement further. Try going to a house party/club/event as a couple for the social experience, talk openly with others. Only play is between the two of you to start….baby steps. In short do not involve yourselves in activities that if uncomfortable you can’t walk away from intact with your relationship between you both. There are plenty of us to offer advice etc on this site, do only what the two of you are comfortable with as yourself, as a couple and your relationship.
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1 pointThis all started around forty years ago when my wife Beth and I had dated for a few years then married. It wasn't long after we married that I introduced her to her first big realistic porn star dildo. When she first saw it she laughed and said, "That'll never fit in my pussy, are you nuts?!" But she agreed to trying and found not only did it fit but she really enjoyed it. She was amazed by how much she enjoyed it. So much so that she requested I use it on her quite a lot. She also discovered she enjoyed big cock porn, she was fascinated by it. Soon was I combining using a huge dildo on her at the same time she watched big cock porn, this led her to experience huge orgasms. She couldn't get enough. She was finally exploring her sexuality and expanding her outlook on sexual pleasure. One night after some really hot sex I questioned her if she ever fantasized about fucking other men, especially well-hung men. She responded that of course she did, stated that most women had this fantasy, and she believed it was quite common. So I pursued it further and asked her if she wanted to try another man's cock and how much did she really desire to do it? She said that it sounded exciting and fun but she would never do anything to endanger our marriage. I said, "What if I told you that I wanted to watch you have sex with another man, one that had a really big cock. Would you then consider it?" She laughed and said she'd be game if it was something I was serious about and really wanted her to do. She said, "Come on, let's be real. It's exciting and fun to imagine it, but to really do it? Please! That's a major game changer." So I said, "I'm very serious. I've watched the way you enjoy the dildos especially while watching big cock videos. It turns me on big time seeing how excited you get and how many times you climax from doing these two things at the same time. I want to watch you do it for real. No BS, just watching you getting slammed by a big cock would be a huge turn-on for me. So what do you really think now that you know that I'm serious and am giving you this opportunity?" I could see her giving it some serious thought, she didn't get mad or upset at me or the idea, no resistance whatsoever to my request. The more she considered the idea the more it appeared to me that she was very intrigued with the idea and it excited her. She started asking all kinds of questions, like wouldn't I be jealous, or think the worst of her, or what if she really enjoyed it and wanted more or didn't feel comfortable screwing another man, then what? Were there any rules and what were the consequences? Was I absolutely sure that I really wanted her to do this, because once done there was no going back! After she finished asking everything she had concerns about I answered all her questions and we talked about the rules/boundaries we would have in place to keep it fun and exciting without any reservations or guilt. This was to make sure she fully understood my concerns and alleviate all of hers as well. It seemed she came to a decision at which point she smiled and enthusiastically said yes, she'd do it! Did I have someone special in mind she wondered? She said she had to agree to my choices for her sexual escapades or it wasn't gonna happen. I then informed her I was thinking of Bruce. Beth squealed with glee, she admitted she has had fantasies about Bruce for some time now and I couldn't have picked a better choice for her first time. She would absolutely love to fuck Bruce. She said she was getting wet thinking about sex with him. A few days later I met up with Bruce for an after work drink. As we enjoyed several drinks we talked a lot. Soon I steered the conversation towards my wife Beth. I asked Bruce to be honest and tell me what he thought about Beth. He admitted he thought Beth was smokin' hot. She had a killer body and was just gorgeous, always was friendly, and liked flirting with him when they were together. I asked him if he' ever had the chance would he consider having sex with her? He looked a bit concerned by my question but answered yes, he wouldn't hesitate to take advantage of such an opportunity. So I told him that Beth really wanted to have sex with him, and that I was okay with them hooking up. I explained that was my kink watching her get fucked by other men, it really turned me on. Bruce considered it for several minutes then said okay sure, he'd love to fuck Beth. Just give him the details when we're ready to make it happen. When I got home I told Beth about my conversation with Bruce and what he said. She looked startled and said she couldn't believe I did that. So I asked her if what I did was so wrong and did she still want to go through with it? She excitedly said Oh hell yes she did, and no I wasn't wrong! So we made plans and set a date for Beth's first cock. The night arrived finding Beth both excited and hot with anticipation. She was dressed to kill showing off her sexy body wearing no underwear. When Bruce knocked on the door I answered it and escorted him into our house. Beth entered the living room and gave Bruce a big hug pressing her chest and pelvis into him and then kissed him on the lips. Bruce kissed her back and he sat down pulling her on to his lap. Nether one of them wasted any time, tongues going everywhere, hands exploring and groping each other, clothes coming off. Soon they were both naked and Beth got a pleasant surprise, Bruce was very well hung. She giggled with delight. Beth took Bruce's hand and led him to our bed. She pushed him down on the bed and went to work on Bruce's big cock giving him an enthusiastic blow job. After a while Bruce flipped Beth on her back and went to work on her pussy and clit. Beth orgasmed in minutes, fully enjoying Bruce's skilled tongue. I stood in the background watching the show. Soon Bruce moved into position between Beth's legs. As he rubbed his cock against Beth's open pussy and clit she responded with loud moans and started pressing her pussy against Bruce's cock. As he slid his huge cock into Beth's pussy she had a big climax. As he went deeper he increased his speed and Beth climaxed again. She was enthralled with his big cock pumping her pussy, she was moving her hips and swearing, telling him his cock felt so good. She looked over at me and said she loved how good his big cock felt inside her. She told Bruce to stretch her pussy good, to fuck her hard. She was in sexual ecstasy, a place she'd never been before. Her facial expressions showed pure bliss and the sounds she was making were hot as hell. I never seen her so turned on, she must of had a dozen orgasms, many of which were huge. They fucked each other hard for a good twenty minutes then Bruce erupted into Beth's pussy, filling her with his cum. This gave Beth another climax. Afterwards he laid on Beth for a minute then rolled off her. He'd destroyed her pussy, it gaped open with his cum dripping out of her. They kissed and he got up to dress while Beth laid there spent. She looked at me and smiled big time. She said, "Your turn!", so I took sloppy seconds and enjoyed it beyond belief. Bruce watched us have sex then commented that watching real sex was so much hotter than any porno ever could be. He understood my enjoyment of watching my wife fuck other men. He said he'd like to do it again and Beth was all for it. So they made plans to hook up again. Then Bruce left. Beth and I talked about how well things went, and how she wasn't prepared for how much she enjoyed his big cock. It was mind boggling! She thanked me profusely for asking her to do this, the opportunity to experience such awesome sex. She says she'll never be the same again and is looking forward to more big cock sex. So our new lifestyle began.
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1 pointMy Angel came home after a tryst looking pained. She meets married men from a cheaters group with my knowledge and shares all with me. She’s a great actress in her sexting messages she has before meeting the married men. The majority are in sexless or very vanilla marriages looking to work out his sexual thoughts. Rape Play is real, I read his messages and her answers. She set boundaries and told me she had safe words and promised to keep her phone close. I asked her if he hurt her, Yes. With a smile. Did he stop? Once when I used the word. She said she enjoyed the role playing with the pain bringing a strange pleasure. I’m happy she isn’t in a worse condition after her role playing doing something I couldn’t do before knowing she enjoys it.
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1 pointI agree there's probably many reasons. My immediate response would be similar to Couplers, simply having what is needed and letting him do what he will with it...to it. I am here to please. Another is probably a mental aspect. To be pretty, polite, sweet etc is nice and all. But to be incredibly impolite at the end of that cute day is sort of a power trip for me, even tho I'm the one being used. I will ask my husband to tell me I'm sweet while he's treating me anything but, or tell me I'm pretty in his stupor after having cum all over my face. I’ve recently told him to "make" me give him a bj the next time he thinks I'm being bratty. It's the juxtaposition of behaviors and treatments that do it for me. Also, good old fashioned dominance. It's just hot!
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1 pointI won’t call it a desire, I have had an ongoing relationship with a woman of color for years. She was not an attraction because of color, more that she is a wonderful person that enjoys fun and laughs even though she knew I was married when we met. She is also a beautiful person physically, thin, small breasts and perfect butt. I don’t mention a peculiar difference, she gets white foamy when we play, something she says is just her lubrication.
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1 pointI the man cheated which caused her to cheat which strangely brought our relationship closer. If I hadn’t cheated first I don’t believe I could have accepted her being with other men. Ironically most of her partners are married cheaters looking for affairs.
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1 pointUnfortunately anecdotal evidence is about as reliable as studies done regarding infidelity. I've seen studies claiming anywhere from 30% to 50% of women have cheated in long term relationships. I've also seen a study where men and women were asked if they would cheat if there was a 100% chance that they would never get caught, and 90% of both men and women said "yes". Overall, in my nearly 6 decades on this floating blue orb in space, I think that women cheat less than men. Women and men cheat for some similar, but also some different reasons. Men are horndogs and opportunists. We also get rather stupid around naked titties. Women tend to be more level headed about sex in general, and for the most part I don't think are as opportunistic as men. For the most part women have less opportunity to cheat as many are stay at home moms and have children with them 24/7. Most men don't have that obstacle to deal with. Interestingly enough, a study a few years ago about sexual desire in long term relationships inadvertently found that women require sexual variety more than men. It's always been thought that "men will be men" and need sexual variety. Most men in the study responded that even after 10 years they desired their wife as much as when they first hooked up, even if they had or were currently having an affair. However, women's desire for their husband diminished as the years went on. We hear this over and over from men in long term relationships, that their wife never wants to have sex. But those women that were happy in their marriages in every other respect, and that admitted to having affairs, reported a greatly increased desire for sex with their husband again. This seems to also hold with the old trope that men drag their wives into the Lifestyle, but the wives keep them in them in it. So overall my opinion is: Some women cheat, most don't. But women benefit from sexual variety more than men.
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1 pointThe three of us women in our poly family have occasional DPs with the guys and we all enjoy it. But this thread makes me realize that we're all more FFM people. That's how we sleep: the two bedrooms shared by the adults are designated as "David's" and "Red's," although the vast majority of the space is taken up with women's stuff. We women decide which two of us will sleep with one guy and the third girl gets the other guy for herself. We don't make a rule of it, but it evens out.
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1 pointI usually prefer playing with men serially, one after another. Anal by itself doesn't do much for me, I've never orgasmed that way, but one man in my pussy and one in my bum is delightful, real synergy. We've never had a problem with the physical aspects of it.
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1 pointTwo thoughts for further consideration - some spouses don't require that they know in order for play to be permissible. If hubby David or one of the others in our poly family was having sex with someone else without me/the others knowing, I wouldn't consider it cheating. OTOH, we'd share the stories. Second, what level of commitment is required to be cheating? Marriage, yes. But beyond that I wouldn't feel guilty if I had sex with someone who was in a relationship with someone else, but they weren't married.
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1 pointAddressing this post, no random meeting is absolutely safe, my feeling is it is safer, random pickups are dangerous. My AM meeting was completely different from any other man I met just for sex. I knew this when I set up the date, not expecting a highly charged sexual night. He did not lie on his profile or in our conversations prior to meeting him, he was a true novice to sexual anything. I assured him that it will be fun for him but he was nervous about being with me. He kept talking about his wife and kids, showing me so many pictures. My understanding it’s an upbringing of his wife that is the problem, sexually repressed. The big take away is that he had sex with the lights on and saw what a naked woman looks like.
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1 pointWhen she was single, my now wife Daniela preferred and had (the best word is) "relationships" with many married men, often more than one at a time. She preferred married guys for a number of reasons: there were limits to the relationship (none of them wanted to leave their wife, regardless of what was said in the moment), they were particularly grateful, that they were fucking another woman - their wife - and Daniela would get them to talk about it and always arranged for him to "accidently" meet the wife (something of a kink of Daniela's), and there was no expectation that he would buy her anything, she hated that aspect of regular dating. When I first met Daniela we went out, then started having sex, we openly talked about our past. I got to the point quickly where I told her that I didn't need for her to be monogamous, but please no married men. She explained that she never broke up a marriage, she helped repair them and keep them together. She liked being the secret third in a marriage, the other woman, who tried to make him a better husband and provided him what was missing. Many gifts were bought, vacations taken, dinners enjoyed, but not with Daniela, with his wife. Daniela even bought and paid for gifts for the guy's wives for him to give her. Then Daniela wanted to hear all about it, how the relationship was going, including the sex. Meanwhile, Daniela gave him what he lacked, whether it was sex when there was little or none, to specific things that his wife just wouldn't do - ride him cowgirl, anal, blowjobs to completion, dirty talk. That's why my wife is so happy where we ended up in the lifestyle. After her hotwifing at first to get comfortable that marriage doesn't mean monogamy, then MFMs with me, we started to swing, but settled into swapping within a closed group of married couples. Now she can openly fuck a married guy in our group and talk directly with his wife, even play with her. (I've left out the bi aspect of my wife's past and current sex life, that's a whole other story.) Plus in her mind, Daniela gets to mind play with the fact that she is a married woman with other men in her life, and I am her husband with other women in my life. The whole purpose of this post is that I have come to understand, there are reasons that a woman wants to play, have a relationship with a married man, be his sidepiece. And it isn't necessarily wrong. Of all the married guys that Daniela had relationships with when she was single, only one wife suspected. She confronted Daniela at one of the arranged, "accidental" meetups. Daniela admitted to it, and wife told her that she must have a "golden pussy", then asked her to meet up for dinner. The wife never confronted the husband, the relationship continued for a while, then ended. But Daniela and the wife kept in pleasant contact for a while thereafter. The couple is still together. Strange. Daniela doesn't read much here on the Swingerboard, but she helped me with this post.
