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I typed out a reply earlier and forgot to push reply. Long story short, we did it. Boy did we do it. We both had a great time. I was 100% ok with seeing him and my wife..actually, I think I became interested in seeing it before my wife did doing it. We had a played with our own partners for a while then we decided to soft swap. As it turns out both of them are multi orgasmic. Well that makes things a little difficult actually. At one point my play partner said "you are going to have to get on top because I don't know if I can control myself." My wife then suggested a full swap. At that point everyone wanted to fuck. I was hesitant and said we should keep doing what we were doing. It was very clear that we all wanted to fuck each other. We did break the rule above and go full swap. We broke our own rule, but these things happen right? Neither of us feel bad, guilty, or jealous. I did have a very fleeting moment on the way home tonight. It was gone almost as soon as it came. We had a lot of fun. We believe we were built for this shit. We decided to become swingers in 2017 and we wasted no time before we went all the way.

Welcome to the board! You certainly have the right attitude going in; having a good time and enjoying each other. Now, if you connect with another couple and the two of you think you'd like to do something with them, just let them know you are interested in a little fun with them. It is generally recommended that the female make the inquiry to the other female and allows that couple time to confer privately.

We live in a small town. Only 2 lady docs to pick from. I'm a nurse in our local hospital and work very closely with them both. My doc is an older man and isn't shocked by much... at least he didn't seem too shocked when he saw my nipple piercings! But to tell him I'm a swinger - no way! I don't think I could work with the man anymore. In my situation there has to be some secrets.

As others have said, it seems like a good thing would be for you two to talk over this issue together. Tell each other why you feel as you do- why she decided to stop swinging, and why you are so hot to continue swinging. This is a wild guess, but one possibility is that she might have begun to feel a bit of jealousy, and seeing your high level of enthusiasm might have made her feel less desired by you? If this is the case, it may be that you have some relationship repairing to do.

Last friday night, my girlfriend Paula and I had sex with another couple! WOOHOO! Now, that might not be a big deal to most of you guys, but it is to me. I was in a very openly sexy triad with two women for 20 years, until one wife left us five years ago and my other wife passed away 18 months later. Since November of 2015, I have been a relationship with a lovely, sexy lady who was vanilla but very swing-curious. I decided early on that I was not going to push her into anything. The preceeding four years had been hell on me, and I was not about to screw up a wonderful, lustful relationship by asking for more. Paula liked to talk about other partners a lot, perhaps even a bit fascinated by the idea. We invented group sex fantasies together while having sex, which she found a big turn-on, but I was suspicious that it would remain just talk. Then, last week, Paula got a call from an old friend of hers. He he had been, at various times in her life, both a lover and a platonic friend, but he'd since moved away and married. Paula had previously identified him as someone she might be interested in swinging with. He called to say that he and his wife would be in town for a couple of days, and could we all meet for dinner? We agreed and met at an Italian resturant across town, near their hotel. I was meeting them for the frist time, so Paula took the driver's seat. She brought up my triad past and steered the conversation to things sexual, even reminding her friend about some of their sexual encounters. His wife responded with humor and curiousity, not offense. The wine kept flowing, and the other couple became more open about sharing their own sexual liberality, recounting some tales of same-room sex and some exhibitionistic encounters. By the time it was time to leave the resturant, Paula said we probably were not in a proper state to drive home, and should get a room at the hotel (even though I really don't drink and had only had one glass of wine!). "That is," she went on to say, "if you think separate rooms would be best." The guy immediately looked at his wife eagerly, and she agreed. Following them to the hotel, Paula couldn't shut up. She was so excited, she took off her hose and panties in the car. Once we got to the room, the guy's wife immediately started taking her blouse off. From there on, there was no awkwardness, no crossed signals. We were all there to fuck one other and we all knew it. We guys first got blow jobs from our own partners, then at her friend's suggestion, the girls took turns licking each other's pussies. It was Paula's first time! We eventually took turns penetrating both ladies. (Yes, we used condoms with the other guy's girl.) We didn't end up staying overnight. About midnight, Paula and I decided to head for home. Paula thought it was about the hottest thing she's ever done and says she wants to find a way to do it again. A day or two later she asked me, "Are you really not jealous about me wanting another guy's cock?" I said it truly didn't bother me in the least. She said that was incredibly freeing, and that I might have created a sex monster. I can only hope, right?

Hello all!! I've been spending a lot of time on here over the course of the past couple days and I'm noticing an underlying theme in some of the threads. A lot of correspondence in regards to safe sex seem to mention that using a condom for intercourse is the common practice. However, while engaging in foreplay/oral sex the use of condoms and dental dams becomes carefree. If you're not worried about pregnancy, why use a condom at all? We are actively searching for people to have fun with when we travel to Florida next month and wondered how most of you handle this situation? I know my wife does not enjoy the taste of a condom but as she always says the only way someone is going inside of her is with a love glove :-)

After he finished in her I took my turn. I was so horny from watching them and she was so wet from him coming in her that I came after only a few strokes. I was so embarrassed. He had just fucked her for what seemed like forever. I was getting frustrated waiting for him to get off of her. I could barely feel her and I'm sure that she could barely feel me. It was the first time I felt small. He was the superior lover in the room. I thought things were over. I wanted him to leave but when I got off of the bed he got back on. He was still hard. His cock was bigger than mine and I didn't care about it until I came so quickly and felt so inadequate. I was happy that she was going to experience a cock bigger than mine but now I was feeling nervous and jealous. I had just watched her enjoying herself with him but I came so quickly that she never got started with me and now he was going to fuck her again and she was laying there waiting for him. I sat back down in the chair and watched again. It went on for even longer than the first time. He rolled her around into many different positions. I couldn't believe he was staying so hard. She would look over at me occasionally. The look of lust and enjoyment on her face as he pumped his cock in and out of her is what makes watching so much fun. She mouthed the words "I love you" as he fucked her. That was so incredible. I felt reassured and began to get hard again. She was being used by him in a way that she never experienced. In a way that she never experienced with me. I has happy that she was experiencing sexual things like that. I was happy that she was happy. I wanted another try.

Just wondering what people's views are on women with armpit hair? Would you have an issue with it? Would it put you off playing with a woman who had a reasonable amount of hair under her arms? I'm assuming it's usually a bit of a no no, but she's thinking she might like to try it and although it doesn't bother me, I'm not convinced everyone will be a fan.

It's only funny because it's true. Our best practice at a swing club is basically to engage as many people in conversation as you can and are willing to engage. Surprising things happen. Best case scenario has been described, all four of you talk, make jokes and have fun. The conversation from their easily flows to 'finding a room' or private space. What you would like, etc. That being said do not set your sights on one couple and follow them around like puppy dogs (it's happened to us). Try and stay standing and mingle, a funny one liner can lead to 'Hey come meet my wife' Say positive things...last night I told a lady how much I loved her smile...went on to meet her SO, etc. Optimally you guys will be so attractive people will be asking you!! Enjoy and have fun!!

You certainly push a sexual boundary with the way you share your wife. I think it would be pretty natural to feel insecure. I know there are times where I have pushed my sexual boundaries that I feel insecure. A talk with your wife about it, and taking some time to process your feelings seem to be in order. Wish you guys the best.

I'll chime in as a below average man. While I am very new to the LS, I have learned over the years that there is no sense in being insecure about it. Being below average is not going to stop you from playing but being insecure about it will. Most women seem to enjoy a variety of shapes and sizes. There are some women who only like big dicks. They enjoy the feeling of being filled to the max and that's ok. If a woman does not believe she will enjoy sex with me, it is fine because I'm not going to enjoy it if she's not. If she wants to try and it's not getting the job done then there are other ways to do it. It's no different than the fact that some ladies prefer clit stimulation over vaginally. Some ladies like anal and some do not. I find that the ones who only want big cock are in the minority and often times their husbands influence that. I understand that in the LS that my wife is going to fuck men with a bigger dick than me. I'm cool with that. We use toys that are bigger than me including some wearable toys for role play. Just have fun and enjoy yourself.

It's definitely fascinating. I'm an INFP, but I consistently test as borderline INFP/INTP, so I do identify with both types. There are those who say this is not possible, because the "personality stacks" are completely different. But the thing is, I do identify with both. At the same time. Gives me something of a split personality, which I have had to contend with my entire life. If anyone puts any stock in chirology/hand reading, I have a Girdle of Venus (double heart line) and a very long, forked head line, which means passion to the point of hedonism, as well as a capacity for logic/reason with the ability to see things from multiple points of view. I'm able to be very objective and play devil's advocate with ease. Mr. intuition is, I believe an ENTJ/ESTJ. He's a very practical-minded rational. Likes his numbers. I think the high representation of rationals in the lifestyle is probably due to the need to be able to be objective about love and sex, and the ability to remove emotion from one's assessment of things, without discounting its importance. It also requires the tendency to question rules, and the status quo, and say, "So...why are we doing this monogamy thing again? Because I don't get it." Non-rationals say that it's because it's the rule. And if no one followed the rules, there'd be chaos and the world would fall apart. Somewhat true, granted, but the reason we have these annoying rule-questioning types in the first place (a smaller number of them, because we're annoying AF), is because sometimes the rules need to be questioned, and need to change. We keep things fresh.

My fears with MF contact with my wife never became a reality, which is a relief. In actually very glad she got to get some different dick. I feel like she deserves something different from time to time. I love to see her pleasure.

We were indeed ready we are both very reasonably minded people. We tend to look at things objectively long before subjectively. Objectively, we wanted to fuck. Subjectively, it was a great experience. We are very happy with our decision.

Or as warnings about which of their own rules to avoid discussing in public.

Swinging is recreational sex shared with others. I think that somehow, you and your wife instinctively understood that. Good for you!! Proceed with caution because not all of your encounters will go that well. Fortunately, you had an excellent 1st experience which kind of sets the standard going forward.

Condoms prevent pregnancy. Condoms when used for oral is to prevent disease. But if you have to do that ... ? You might want to think about the kinds of people you are having sex with.

It wouldn't bother me!. I think it's sexy.

Since it's the end of the year it's time to do another summary: Going by just the 4 major types we see: General Population Artisan - 39.8% Guardian - 35.3% Idealist - 15.5% Rational - 9.5% Lifestyle Artisan - 8.6% Guardian - 21.3% Idealist - 26.9% Rational - 43.2% Rationals are 4.6X as common in the Lifestyle as in the general population Artisans are 4.6X as common in general as they are in the Lifestyle As for specific traits iNtuition is 2.8X more common in the Lifestyle Introversion is 2.2X more common in the Lifestyle Judgement is 1.5X more common in the Lifestyle Thinking is 1.5X more common in the Lifestyle (Remember that these terms has very specific meanings in Kiersey and Myers-Briggs terminology and do not mean the same as in common English.) That said, you'd expect the INTJs to be wildly more common in the Lifestyle than in the general population and you'd be right. Where INTJs are 1.1% of the general population, INTJs make up 18.6% of Lifestylers. Due to their rarity in the general population and their high representation in the Lifestyle, if you run into an INTJ on the street, chances are almost two to one that they will be in the Lifestyle. By comparison, only 3.8% of the population in general and less than one in a hundred ESTPs, ESFPs swing.

Ok that was then, this is now. The oldest is still 88 (the original thread is older) but now the greatest age difference is 38 years younger. She's 32 and I'm 70 now. In fact she's lying in bed with me now.,life is good.!!

That's a matter of personal judgement. As a physician, I long ago learned to make no assumptions about anyone. Rather, guarantee privacy and confidentiality and let the patient tell the story. Over the years, a number of colleagues have come to me as patients with personal health issues that make non-monogamy look like a skinned knee by comparison. Physicians, particularly older physicians, know two things. First, trust matters. The Hippocratic oath has meaning. Second, how people conduct their lives is their choice. Keeping them healthy and safe is our responsibility. Trust me when I say that we look at STI testing as utterly routine. While certain infections have to be reported to public health authorities, those reports are strictly confidential as well. Non-monogamy is hardly unusual. An asymptomatic swinger who presents him/herself for STI testing is either smart, worried or both. Every responsible physician is happy to do the testing and provide treatment or reassurance as needed.

Welcome and yes as two4youinswva stated the female is the best bet to make the first steps in engaging a couple.But if she happens to be the shy one in the group you can use being a "newbie" to an advantage.Make small talk and say this is your first time in this club and lifestyle.Many couples jump at the chance to be a newbies first couple.But just be yourselves have fun and if nothing happens the first night make friends.And hopefully something happens at the next one.Good luck!

If you aren't comfortable with "more" happening, then pump the brakes. Let your wife know where your head is, and yes, you can tell the other couple what you're feeling and where you'd like the boundaries to be for tonight. They'll appreciate the communication. I know we would. Good luck and have fun.

If it's what the dentists used when I got a root canal, yuk. I think the balloon analogy is good. Sounds very clinical. Why not use plastic wrap and how does it stay in place. Is it worth doing oral with this? I'm trying to learn things on here and not being sarcastic. Sorry if my questions seem stupid.

I think you are in a six month relationship (sorry if I am wrong on this one). It takes a lot of time to really reach the straight up honesty you desire. Part of the honesty is telling your partner what they do not want to hear. IMHO that's next to impossible after only six months. He was honest with you, he told you about the relationship and he has ended it. That's being human and being pretty honest. It really easy to see the faults in others and react to them. It's really hard to see the faults in yourself (and I certainly include myself here) and seriously do something about it. Look I am not saying what he did was great, but I am not entirely sure what he did was that wrong? More than likely things with you spun a little out of control before he really had time to react. At least he is doing his best to rectify, and set the record straight. I mean how often could he actually being seeing the other woman? Were they just touching base every other month or so? Were you Miss Thursday and she was Miss Friday? Obviously you guys were pretty closely in touch for you to think something was odd when he went to see her, so it really couldn't have been that frequent? Yes swinging is about openness and honesty, but that is typically built over time. Can you accept his full honesty, even when he is doing the right thing? I would also re-iterate not discussing this with your BFF and daughter or at least limiting it. Looking back I never really understood the antagonism I received from the BFF of the women I had relationships with. A number of my wife's friends 'disappeared' over the years as her and I have been together. I think there is a certain amount of loss to them that comes with you being in a positive relationship. I can't really comment on going to the party with him tonight. Can you go and have drama free fun? Not discuss the issues you are having? If yes then go, if not beg off, you are not ready. Really this is about you, and deciding what you want and can do. Maybe that is the easiest way to look at it.

My wife tends to be mildly hypochondriacal, really to a subclinical degree. Early in our relationship, when we were having sex two or three times a day (would have been more frequently but we both had demanding jobs) she got a couple of bladder infections. She attributted them to my giving her head, and foreswore receiving oral. I really like licking pussy, and I do get it from other partners. But I wanted to be able to do it with her, so we bought a box of dental dams. Hah! With it stretched over her pussy it felt like licking a balloon... And tasted like it too. And it didn't do anything for her. Definitely NOT recommended. :-)

Does it come with the clamps my dentist uses? Ouch. Is it a dam or a damn! Am I supposed to carry this with me like a condom?

What Lionheart said is the perfect answer and better than I could have said it myself so worth repeating again.

You two really need to communicate and talk this through, but in the end if she doesn't care for it anymore then you should agree and stop swinging altogether.Your marriage should be the number one priority in your relationship and swinging shouldn't be above that.Good luck and hope everything comes out great.

Can't really make somebody be kinky and swing, they need to like it. Still what was said before is true. We need more details in order to assist.

Swing bud has no interest, but I have indulged with others and I enjoy it.

I don't think that could be improved upon. That is pretty much perfect.

I'm sure this has been asked many times but with technology changes I figured an updated answer would be nice. The wife and I are considering finding a third for MFM, we want a "stranger" over the friend option. We are trying to avoid the craigslist crazies and have been thinking of SLS, but is there any other good places? We might make it happen far away from home to avoid any social problems.