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Here's the update: Things around the office have generally gotten better. There are a few (three, to be exact) in the office of 18 that are still disgruntled about the whole thing. They rarely speak with either of us, and find ways to complain about us (she's too loud, I came in late, etc). My boss has become fairly understanding-- he even will ask one of us about how the other is doing. I was called out to a family emergency last week, and my boss regularly checked in with my partner about what was going on with me. Our jobs are less on the line, but we find that the stigma has still taken down our percieved professionalism. I think of it as a detante. As for the kids, they like me more and more. I'm like a favored uncle (and I love it). There are some awkward moments, like when her youngest wanted me to put her in bed instead of her father, but it's all working out ok so far. My partner is easing them into seeing some physical affection between us. She now will hold my hand in their presence or lean into me on the couch. I find that the poly thing is easy for kids to grasp-- I personally think it is more natural to understand than monogomy. Where it gets confusing is when they are told monogomy is the 'best' or 'ultimate' form of relationship by others in society. When my partner's kids hit puberty, then it will get more complicated. That should be about two years, assuming we stay together.

Hmm...Well, my very first threesome was 15 years ago. It was a FMF with my long term boyfriend at the time and my best friend. The three of us were very close friends. The threesome was totally unplanned and initiated by me. I had never given any thought to having a threesome before. The three of us had been out partying (we weren't trashed or anything) and had ended up back at my place. My BF and I were having sex in my room and my friend was getting ready for bed--she was staying over because we left her car at the bar. I remember I just suddenly looked at my BF and said "go tell N she can join us." Of course he did! I recall I had one moment of >. Fast forward to present. I met a lovely couple from a swinger site, we did the usual. Exchanged a few e-mails, went out to dinner to size each other up and talk. Decided we had good chemistry and set a play date. It was awesome! Just some thoughts. I think it went so well for a few reasons: 1)If you're going to try to meet people through swinger sites, be clear about what you want in your profile. Be specific. If you're patient, you can find the right person/couple. 2)we sat down and talked before we hit the sheets. What are your boundaries/rules? What do you not like? What will you not do, ever? And then there was some stuff we agreed that we might do eventually, but not yet. strap ons, oh my! lol 3)Suggestion only--if you want to have a good FMF, make sure you don't have two passive women. That will make for a crappy FMF. Someone has to make the first move/be the aggressor. And generally the women are setting the pace. Was I nervous? Hell , no We all know we're there for sex. There's no reason to be coy. I guess I'm a dive right in to the deep end kind of person, though. I'm like this in all aspects of my life.

Our first threesome was fmf with someone we had played with at the club previously in a group. We went to dinner and then to her house. The action started in her living room. I was sitting on the floor. My husband and she stood up near me and started to kiss. She pulled me up into the kiss. Threeway kissing was fabulous, as was the rest of the night. It was really a wonderful, comfortable, sexy experience! I loved being able to be with two people at once and I really liked watching my husband with her and her watching us. Threesomes are so great, but I'm glad we started with couples first. Previous group experience helped to gauge what our feelings would be when adding another person and learn to take control/get what we need from a situation. Personally, I think threesomes are graduate level swinging as opposed to foursome swaps. I do love threesomes though!