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Hi Mrs. UC, nice to see you come out! Just know this...people make impressions about others very quickly. If you seem very shy and let your husband do all of the talking, people may get the impression very quickly that you are passive. They may think that if you're passive initially (socially), that you'll be passive later, too. See what I mean? It's not unreasonable for people to draw that conclusion. It may not be the reality for you, but it might be what comes across to them. People form opinions in a few seconds or in the first few minutes. Come out right from the get-go with a warm welcome, warm smiles, and something friendly to say. It's not that hard. Just practice it in different kinds of situations and it becomes easier. Your husband started this thread, asking questions on your behalf. It took all this time for you to join with your own post. On the 'net, it looked like you were "quietly standing behind him" and letting him do all of the talking. That gave the impression of passivity. When the two of you are making contacts on websites to meet up with people, is it also like that, with your husband doing most of the "talking"? In my experience, that always made me leary that the woman was passive and possibly even being dragged into this by her husband. Sometimes that was precisely the reality. Don't take this personally or feel defensive. Just consider all of this from the perspective of people who don't know you yet, and only know a little of you through a profile, or a conversation that's being carried mostly by your husband. Again, it's all about impressions, and you've got to do what you can to create the best first impression you can. If you're not really passive at all, show that to people in speaking for yourself, responding to them (written or verbal), etc. These are all just friendly tips to help you find what you want. I hope you keep us posted on what happens!