smoothshavers

Great question! I have pondered this for many years now, not necessarily relative to swinging, but rather pertaining to other issues including religion and politics among just a couple of examples. Before I comment, I would like to express my interest in the SB, and that is the open-mindedness of the idea of swinging. In a certain way I see swinging as a sign of releasing age-old thoughts and ideals to discover our own self. It seems to me that we humans are naturally curious, which I interpret to be "explorers". We have come far in the last 100 yrs, and only recently have begun to explore that new frontier of sex and how does it relate to each of us individually. Having said that, if you should quit because your partner quits, then the opposite should also be true, that your partner should not quit because you don't want to quit. Aside from that trivial point, maybe the individuals involved need to look back and attempt to determine as to why they began to swing in the first place. Was it for the thrill of the unknown? To be able to have sex with others? Because it was forbidden? Or, as is my curiosity, to understand more about my own self and my own limitations. For many years I have had the desire to explore this, one of the last unexplored areas of my physical being. I believe that in order to truly understand another individual, we must first understand our own self and limitations. However, because my SO is still not absolutely ready to make that dive, I continue to hold myself at the side with my SO. I may never have that life experience that I need to complete. I wonder, do I sit and wait as my SO goes about the daily pattern, content to not grow anymore. I believe that we need to grow together. So, if you determine why you started to swing in the first place, maybe then you can determine if swinging is growth or ???? I do not believe that anyone should limit another individual's growth. However, I do believe that an individual can slow down for their SO to join them.

Special ladies that we have, huh?

I'll do DVP with my wife, in a heartbeat! I know that she will cum like crazy! It's more about my love and desire to please her. If she wants a dream house, I will build it for her. If she wants to go see a play,.... well, hopefully she will go with her friend, but if not, then I will go. Keep in mind though, she will surely get more pleasure, attention, and exercise from the DVP. Much better investment.

My wife always swallows! In fact wishes that she could it more often, I feel bad because, unlike most men, I am not that into having a blow job. I need the full entry, but can shoot it down her throat on occasion. Often times she will cum just from the sperm shooting into her mouth. HMMM, I wonder how many willing cocks she can suck and swallow in one night?

Socal1970 Seems like some good advice from the previous posts. We are all on different levels of learning. I would assume that you have children at home that she is mentally preoccupied with, that is her maternal "instinct". With just that in mind, it may be more difficult for her to stray from those sexual beliefs/ideals that were implanted in her when she was younger. BUT, you did marry her for who she was, so don't give up on her just yet. Find the way to communicate with her, there is a way! Maybe just keep it as a fantasy for now. We all release our inhibitions at our own stages. Good Luck

MrMrsSmith: We are also new at the swinging and have the same concerns as you, actually probably more her than me. After reading the advice and suggestions of the above "experienced", I think that we both have some good input from them. Thank you all for your input.

I am somewhat familiar with the Kinsey studies back in the early 1950's. I recall that his "groundbreaking" studies were frowned upon, although we are now finally finding some value to them. I suppose that one might say that these forums are a continuation of his pioneering research/study. I just scanned the Wikipedia explanation, and it may be that I am perhaps closest to the "Two-Spirit". Quite sure that I could not have a "romance" with another male, but, I will continue to try to understand femininity. Thanks for the response.

I am new to this Board and to swinging, and as all others here, I read the forums because of my curiosity and desire to understand sexuality, mine and others. If I grab a man's cock and put into my wife, does that make me BI? If I shake his hand, does that make me Bi? If I hug my son on his birthday, does that make me Bi (I have been told that!)? Can anyone here point me to the "Bi Rule Book"? Seems to me that some have a desire to have sexual experiences with the same sex. Perhaps they are truly Gay or Bi (need to read the "rulebook"), OR, perhaps they are just exploring/discovering to find their self, their limitations, desires. Nothing wrong with that. Others have the desire to please their partner, to fulfill their partners fantasies. Isn't that a part of swinging (as well as discovering yourself), because we all like the way our partner has orgasm. Do we do it because we love them and want them to be happy? To enhance our own sex life? I love my wife dearly and I like to think that I would do anything for her. Would she do anything for me? Not important, what is important to me is her, when she is happy, I am happy.

We like shaved, smooth. No hair in the teeth, no tickling of the nose, no pubic hairs all over the bed and shower, easier cleanup, no urine taste or smell during cunnilingus (experienced this with unshaved women, YUK), great feeling when fully entered and rubbing, longer sex sessions because the hair is not there rubbing on my shaft or her lips like a wire brush. I like to gently rub my face and gently kiss all over her shaved vagina after she comes in my mouth (as if I am caressing or loving her, like holding her after I cum in her), then when she is ready I can lick her her again before penetration. With me shaven, she gets more excited and has better orgasms. She says that that is because she can feel me more. She too likes sucking shaved, it seems more clean that way, no place for the germs and bacteria to hide. I would choose hairy legs and unshaved armpits with a shaved pubic. The shaved pussy seems so feminine to me, like she cares about herself. HMMM. Could be that she shaves it just so that she will get a good "lickin", sometimes twice before penetration. I love to lick shaved pussy!!!!

I suppose that we are essentially new to swinging. We have had a previous experience (testing the waters) at a swingers club a couple years ago. It was just the 2 of us having sex in a curtained area of the club. Since then, we have discussed our boundaries and may be ready for the "full monte" as we have discussed.

This is one of my wife's fantasies, to watch me suck a cock. The thought of it makes her go crazy! If that makes her crazy, just imagine how crazy it would make her if I swallowed it!