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cplnuswing

Sex toy or salad shooter?

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I saw an ad for this and just had to think - Really?

 

Autoblow

 

I can't think of anything I want a sex toy to look like much less than a kitchen small appliance.  Sorry, just doesn't get me in the mood to try it out on my dick.  I used the blog post link instead of straight to the manufacturer's website, since like me, the author reports like but not love feelings when it comes to blowjobs.  Supposedly the Autoblow will change your tune on that, but let's just say I have my doubts...

 

And in the dumbest thing I've heard in decades department, you can even use it while cruising through rush hour traffic in your Tesla 🙄  Who needs a cell phone when you can crash in pleasure with the Automoblow

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Well, according the marketing, the shooting part is a given, can't hold it back if you tried.  Just a matter of your aim then I guess ;)

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    • By Mistral Wind
      My husband, Tim, met a new prospective client the other day, and an hour appointment went on for another three hours. Then Tim returned to the office glowing with excitement. "Hey, Mistral, the new clients want the Full Monty and more from us!"
       
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      Greg is a tall, dark, very fit 45-year-old with boundless energy and a very sharp, intelligent mind with a wacky sense of humor. Susan is a Nicole Kidman look-alike, red blonde hair, 5'2", pert small breasts with really pink nipples, and the greatest tight little butt I have ever seen. Her hair was shoulder-length curly and shone like spun red gold. Some women you meet and like from day one. We liked the same food and wine and laughed about some of her office's young, horny, and frustrated studs.
       
      Within three weeks of working almost every day with them both, a very positive relationship had started between us. I began to feel that Susan might be bi. She often sat close, and when we were going through my graphic designs, she would sometimes run her hand down my arm or touch my face gently when asking her searching questions. Her being a client, I was always careful not to respond in a sexual way just in case I had misread her. As the working days passed, the banter became more friendly and frank.
       
      After a few dinners and lunches, we were invited to their place for a relaxing weekend after getting most of the projects specified and starting to build. Their income was high, so we expected a nice place when we drove up. It was spectacular!
       
      Greg had said, "Well, it's a small mansion, built about 1795, Robert Adam style." Greg's idea of small contained seven bedrooms, a covered heated pool with a Sauna and Jacuzzi, and the garden had the cutest little Japanese Bonsai tree garden with a beautiful love seat.
       
      When we arrived Friday late afternoon, we just had time to briefly chill out with them doing "the tour." We were shown many large elegant rooms alongside some small intimate settings that would suit a pair of lovers. We met Jonathon, Greg's 21-year-old son, who had just finished University and would take a year off to explore the world. Jon is into falconry in a big way and owns three Harris Hawks: Brody, Bandit, Blackthorn, and a Peregrine Falcon called Blade. I spent an hour chatting with Jon about his birds. I quickly realized the Harris Hawks were an intelligent community-minded group that would work together to hunt their prey.
       
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      On the way home, Tim said solemnly: "You realize that the weekend could have gone dreadfully wrong if it was a trap. We were caught out, well nearly!"

      The following weekend swinger party is another edition of this story…
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