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My wife is addicted to gangbang. What should I do?

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Well, eventually I managed to convince my wife to consult psychiatrics & she was diagnosed as sexual compulsion disorder & she was using sex as means of coping with stress as she is having very low stress tolerance threshold level. Further test revealed that she is a case of Borderline Personality Disorder.
She recovered from her addiction

 

You know through the entire thread I was just waiting to get to the bottom to say are you sure there isn't an untreated psychiatric disorder going on here. Though must question your statement about recovered from her addiction, it is not just an addication if she has been diagnosed as above. The above can be controlled with medication, Borderline however is a whole other issue and a life long issue.

 

I hope your wife is continuing with professional supports.

 

P.S. I also agree Gang bangs are a fetish and not part of the lifestyle.

I have also noticed that every time Bigman posts the numbers at his wife's alleged gangbang change. More than two is still tooooooo many for my taste. :eek:

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I would really love to have my wife join in swinging I have had experiences with couples in the past or even get her in a gang bang but she doesn’t seem interested any idea’s please 

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Brian, one idea is to check with your wife if you haven’t already and make sure she’s okay with you posting face photos of her in the Gallery section here, even if they are vanilla. 
 

In terms of "persuading" your wife to engage in swinging when she’s already expressed her disinterest, I believe you are probably out of luck. The best you can do is let her know that you would like to open up your sex life as a couple and that if in the future she decides she’d like to consider the matter you’ll be keen to discuss it further.

 

(If you take the time to explore the many string on this subject that are on this subject, you’ll be able to learn how others have dealt with this. A warning, it doesn’t often end with the disinterested partner changing their mind.)

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On 5/21/2006 at 1:15 PM, intuition897 said:

Nothing, I guess. As long as she knows she can handle it and knows that it WILL be kept under control. What we are not seeing here is any evidence of commonsense precautions. SHE can't expect to keep a party under control; what is she 5'6", 120-150 lbs? What's the combined weight of the men? Plus, there's no husband present. Having the woman's partner present seems to me would be a stupidity-inhibiting factor. Instead, what they're going to see (probably because they want to see it) is a party girl who has no value for herself, whose husband obviously doesn't value her, and who has basically just thrown herself at them to do with what they want. You don't know any of these men! The likelihood of finding two good single men in one place who understand the lifestyle, are healthy, etc...is pretty damn slim! You can't really expect that there are magically 10-15 of them wandering onto the guest list on their own? You have to get involved in this. HAVE to. It doesn't sound like your wife wants to bother screening them; she just wants a big number. Is it the big number that turns her on? The more men at the party, the more desired she is? I'm sure she could get as much out of a much smaller group. As I suggested, about 4 or 5. This is far more manageable a group.

 

But what am I still posting here for? You want an opinion of whether or not I think a woman can realistically handle - herself - a group of 15-30 horny men?

 

NO.

 

I do not.

My unasked-for opinion, also, is that a gang-bang is the last thing the two of you should be thinking about; you guys have some problems in your relationship that are needing some 911 intervention.

This is all very true.  My GF is not addicted to gangbangs as she is not constantly looking for the next one however she definitely enjoys them.  Dumping 10-15 guys on your SO without supervision is a recipe for disaster.  These situations can escalate pretty quick and with that many men someone is going to cross the line physically, take off their condom, etc.  My GF has had some very small gangbangs (3-5) without me present supervising but there was always some people we knew involved including one of my buddies who is a childhood friend of mine.  But 10-15 guys without any supervision whatsoever I wouldn't be able to sleep.

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Never had a real gangbang myself, but hubby likes to jump in after another man or two has had me.  Participation may be the key to acceptance and enjoyment; at some point marking her as your wife.

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On 11/23/2021 at 4:50 AM, Brian Jenkins said:

I would really love to have my wife join in swinging

 

On 11/23/2021 at 11:03 AM, PeterJ said:

In terms of "persuading" your wife to engage in swinging when she’s already expressed her disinterest, I believe you are probably out of luck. The best you can do is let her know that you would like to open up your sex life as a couple

Good advice, but may I recommend that you tell your wife that you are willing to let her open up her sex life with absolutely no expectations that you will do so on your part.  Perhaps she doesn't want to see you with another woman or is worried about the consequences. She, however, like just about any person, wants the freedom to explore sexually while having a dedicated, loving spouse.  That's what hubby let me do, while he remained monogamous with me.  After two years I was comfortable with, no eager for, him playing.

 

And be sincere.  Let her do what she wants, with whom she wants, when she wants, and how she wants (you there or not, participating or not).  Listen if she wants to talk about it and reassure her that you love her.  If she doesn't want to talk, don't press her.  The best way for her to get into the lifestyle is on her own terms.

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It is absolutely hilarious listen to the comments about your story. Everybody says I think you need to talk to her. It’s almost like you didn’t say that in the story that you have been talking until you’re blue in the face. You have been discussing this with her and talking with her and it’s like everybody in here keeps telling you that you need to talk to her. That is absolutely insane. Dude you really need to just boss up. Your wife is talking to you like you are a bitch. You have expressed to her that you don’t like it and she doesn’t give a shit. You need to cut your losses and say OK if you don’t care about the marriage and let’s go ahead and get this divorce over with and then you have to worry about listening to me say how I don’t like you doing it. Make sure you record that shit that she’s doing and then get a good divorce attorney and watch the scramble to try to figure out what the hell to do now. Maybe she can get all those guys from her gangbang to support her or take over the support that you are doing but working your ass off to take care of your family. But in the end you need to just say if you don’t give a damn and I don’t give a damn but let’s go ahead and get a divorce. If my feelings don’t count then one of us needs to bounce And leave the house and get a divorce

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46 minutes ago, 10thBadger said:

It is absolutely hilarious listen to the comments about your story. Everybody says I think you need to talk to her. It’s almost like you didn’t say that in the story that you have been talking until you’re blue in the face. You have been discussing this with her and talking with her and it’s like everybody in here keeps telling you that you need to talk to her. That is absolutely insane. Dude you really need to just boss up. Your wife is talking to you like you are a bitch. You have expressed to her that you don’t like it and she doesn’t give a shit. You need to cut your losses and say OK if you don’t care about the marriage and let’s go ahead and get this divorce over with and then you have to worry about listening to me say how I don’t like you doing it. Make sure you record that shit that she’s doing and then get a good divorce attorney and watch the scramble to try to figure out what the hell to do now. Maybe she can get all those guys from her gangbang to support her or take over the support that you are doing but working your ass off to take care of your family. But in the end you need to just say if you don’t give a damn and I don’t give a damn but let’s go ahead and get a divorce. If my feelings don’t count then one of us needs to bounce And leave the house and get a divorce

I would just like to point out that the original post was from 2004 and I am thinking any advice is probably falling on deaf ears by now!

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