First timers. So many questions. So many butterflies.

[WiscoWild 25]

Hello! Let us introduce ourselves. We are a married, straight couple in our early 40’s. We’ve been married for 18 years, and have kids. We’ve never had any fun with anyone else outside of marriage, and, for the wife, she’s never had another partner. 
 

A little while ago, we were at the close neighbors’ house, having some drinks, and for whatever reason, I brought it up. The neighbors said they were interested too, and to my unbelievable surprise, my wife said she was open to it. We didn’t do anything that night, but talked about it when we got home. My wife stared “planning” by talking about condoms and lube and toys and whatnot. 
 

I am just so surprised by this, for a few reasons. 
 

1) Our sex life is good, but really pretty vanilla. Her on top, then me on top, and it’s over usually. 
 

2) She absolutely will not receive or give oral. Period. Ever. I’ve never received oral from her. I’ve asked to both give and receive, but she just replies that she doesn’t like it. 
 

I mentioned, when we were talking that the neighbor wife had offered and was willing to perform oral on me just then. I mentioned that it might be awkward and uncomfortable if my wife refuses. 
 

I am NOT about to make or try to convince my wife to do something that she does not want to do. I’d rather not go through with this, than make her uncomfortable. 
 

Has anyone gone through something similar? 
 

How does the neighbor factor play in here? Is it a good or bad idea to have our first experience with friends that live right next door? 
 

I’m sort of regretting bringing this up. It was an instant decision to say what I said, and am really shocked that everyone was game to play. I guess I’m nervous to do something like this, but really thinking this will be fun. 
 

Thank You! 

[lustylearning 705]

Cat’s out of the bag now!😂 If you have concerns about a strained life with your neighbors if things go south or fizzle out, maybe agree to be supportive of each other’s journey without being a direct part of it. If you two would like to break into swinging though, I’d caution you against assuming that you and your wife will be the same with other people as you are with each other, especially if seeing each other behave differently will result in hard in feelings between the two of you. Please discuss boundaries before jumping in. 

[WiscoWild 25]

Thanks for the reply. I agree with everything you said. 
 

I can honestly say that I would be happy to see my wife pleased by another man, maybe in a way or an act that I never thought of. I’m always willing to learn something new. 
 

As far as my wife goes, I honestly think she knows that I throughly enjoy oral, she just doesn’t want to do it. She has a very sensitive gag reflex, that I have learned to accept. I’m ok with that. 
 

I also think that she knows I like it, and is supportive of my receiving if we go through with this. 
 

I thought about have a date night with the neighbors, and make it clear that we’re not going to do ANYTHING until we go through the “list” and make sure we are all on the same page. I think that would be a good thing to do, but don’t want to make this seem so “sterile” either. 
 

I think it is completely obvious that again, although my wife surprised me with her willingness to go ahead with talking about this, she would be the most reserved of the 4 of us. 
 

I also don’t want her to feel pressured, or don’t want the other couple to feel like I’m “getting the better end of the deal” and taking advantage of the situation. 
 

Sorry if I’m overthinking all of this, but I’m both excited and confused! 
 

thanks. 

[discreetplay 218]

For us, we had a similar opportunity with neighbors. They were lifelong friends of my wife and there had been some interaction between all of them in the past (the other couple didn't know I was in the know of the things that had occurred in the past). We had a huge hot tub. They came over often for meals, games, etc. There was always some comments made (I'm a flirt and always drop innuendo regardless of who we're hanging out with...all in fun). Knowing the other wife would be game immediately and the husband would give anything to do my wife, nothing ever went further than the flirty talk. My wife and I decided that dipping a toe in that pool could destroy the friendship. It just wasn't worth it.

 

My advice would be to join a site if you're interested in bringing someone else into your bedroom. While playing with the neighbor is easy and convenient, there is a high likelihood of four newbies messing things up. With the convenience, who is the first to become jealous when one spouse is working from home while the spouse of the other couple wanders over for lunch? Especially when your wife doesn't do oral and the neighbor's wife does. Is there an accusation of a morning BJ when you take too long to get the paper? What about your one-partner wife finding her inner sex goddess while riding the neighbor's large-then-your cock? She no longer seems content with your average ride as often as she used to and seems to only want sex when the neighbor's monster truck is involved. Simple friendly banter that occurs now will be looked on differently. This is especially true when one of the husbands can't get it up during an encounter (nerves are terrible for erections) while the other is a stallion. One of the men, maybe you or maybe him, could become infatuated with the other/new woman, like he's 17 again. These physical encounters will be an hour, a couple hours once, twice a week....but you live next to them 24 hours a day, every day. What happens when you give it a try and one of the four involved didn't enjoy it? Does the for sale sign go up? What happens when your kids see mom or dad is heavily flirting and touchy with the neighbor? 

 

If you were both experienced LS couples, I'd say what the heck. You've been there before and know you can handle the sights and sounds. Newbies...no way. 

 

 

[travelingprofessional 46]

I agree with discreetplay. Don't go there with the neighbors.

 

 

1 hour ago, WiscoWild said:

don’t want the other couple to feel like I’m “getting the better end of the deal”

Imagine...Your wife and the other husband watching you get oral, then penetrate and then oral again from this other woman while she and he play touchy feely like they're 13 because she won't do oral or receive oral. The neighbor wouldn't be getting much based on your description of your vanilla sex. While you would be getting something new and exciting (there is little chance the neighbor is vanilla like your wife) he'd be getting nothing new or exciting. 

 

The experiences we've had, when the sexual involvement is different between the couples, it isn't much fun. My SO is an oral goddess. We were with another couple where the wife tried but it showed she wasn't interested in giving. She laid on the bed while my SO went back and forth between me and the other husband. He was barely able to stand as his legs grew wobbly while he was getting the best oral he'd ever had. I was in heaven watching her give it to him and then back to me. I have a video of this encounter and it is so crazy hot. Yet the look on the other wife's face while she laid on the bed said it all. Once the encounter was over, we never heard from them again. I spoke with the other husband off the record, asking why they didn't want to meet up again. He said that the 10 minutes of oral was enough to stop their LS encounters for 6 months because his wife was so pissed. Their marriage survived, they had been in the LS for years, but she really didn't like him enjoying oral like that when she hated giving it.

 

There are so many land mines here that can blow up your life. No way it is worth it. 

 

[WiscoWild 25]

Thanks for all the feedback… well we made decisions and we will live with them. 
 

Went to their house last night. Had a few drinks. Wife was slow dancing with the neighbor. Sat on the couch. Got a very nice blow job. Neighbor did my wife. I did his wife. He came on my wife’s chest and I came in her. 
 

neighbor’s wife didn’t want any in her or on her. That’s ok with me! 
 

I guess we are in the LS now? 😂

[hunterdonNJcpl 1,086]

I would normally advise against swapping partners with the couple next door, but it's too late now and it sounds like a success! Welcome to the Lifestyle. Buckle up bc it can be a wild ride.

 

So how did you and your wife feel the next morning? Any mixed feelings or regrets?

[discreetplay 218]

I'm very curious how this goes. Your quick synopsis seems to lean towards a threesome with the other wife mildly involved. Your wife gave a "very nice blowjob", you swapped wives but the finally was the two of you with your wife.

 

2 hours ago, hunterdonNJcpl said:

So how did you and your wife feel the next morning? Any mixed feelings or regrets?

I'm curious about this as well.

 

Please keep us posted. And welcome to the LS.

[WiscoWild 25]

6 hours ago, discreetplay said:

I'm very curious how this goes. Your quick synopsis seems to lean towards a threesome with the other wife mildly involved. Your wife gave a "very nice blowjob", you swapped wives but the finally was the two of you with your wife.

 

I'm curious about this as well.

 

Please keep us posted. And welcome to the LS.

Hi. I typed a reply, but it seems to have disappeared. 😂. 
 

It was very much a group effort. Not a threesome. We had discussed where we could cum early in the encounter. From start to finish, it was about 30ish minutes. Not super long, but super fun! 
 

it was the neighbors wife that gave me a BJ, while my wife and her husband danced and made out. 
 

The girls each came twice. Then it was the boys turn. I came in my wife, while the neighbor was giving her husband oral, and she was rubbing my balls. 
 

I came in my wife, while the neighbor stroked it out of her husband on my wife’s chest. 
 

there are ZERO regrets. We sat and talked and drank for 2 hours afterwards. This morning, my wife and I agreed that it was a lot of fun!! 
 

 

[njbm 2,728]

Congrats and welcome to the lifestyle!

[oldswinger64 86]

A wonderful Start.  It is nice to hearing about loving beginnings. 

[zonaboy801 32]

Congrats! Did you guys end up using condoms?

[WiscoWild 25]

3 hours ago, zonaboy801 said:

Congrats! Did you guys end up using condoms?

We did. However when it came time to finish up, they came off. 

[Anon321 481]

I find it interesting that you've never received oral sex from your wife.  I have a feeling that might change when you continue down this lifestyle.  Just don't get too upset or bitter if another dick makes it into her mouth before yours.

[WiscoWild 25]

43 minutes ago, Anon321 said:

I find it interesting that you've never received oral sex from your wife.  I have a feeling that might change when you continue down this lifestyle.  Just don't get too upset or bitter if another dick makes it into her mouth before yours.

Yeah. Its ok. She has a SUPER strong gag relex. That’s just how some people are. That wasn’t going to break this thing up. It’s been going on 20 years now. 
 

I joked about this with her yesterday. She said she promises that I’ll be her first… if not, I really don’t care. For us, this is about an adventure… not a competition. 

[KatrinaandDriverX 88]

Katrina here--  So, how was the kissing ?  Did the women orgasm ? Was everyone playful or serious ?

[Anon321 481]

4 hours ago, WiscoWild said:

Yeah. Its ok. She has a SUPER strong gag relex. That’s just how some people are. That wasn’t going to break this thing up. It’s been going on 20 years now. 
 

I joked about this with her yesterday. She said she promises that I’ll be her first… if not, I really don’t care. For us, this is about an adventure… not a competition. 

I think that's the right attitude to have!  You'll both get exposed to new things that can help your own sex life.

 

A gag reflex can be lost or desensitized.  My GF definitely still has a gag reflex but significantly less than it used to be.  Years of facefucking took care of that.  Like most things, experience usually takes care of it.

[WiscoWild 25]

14 hours ago, KatrinaandDriverX said:

Katrina here--  So, how was the kissing ?  Did the women orgasm ? Was everyone playful or serious ?

Hi! There was lots of kissing. It was really great. The women both came a couple times each. It was really playful to start, and during most of it. Towards the end we got down to business. 
 

All-in-all, it was a great experience!! 

[WiscoWild 25]

11 hours ago, Anon321 said:

I think that's the right attitude to have!  You'll both get exposed to new things that can help your own sex life.

 

A gag reflex can be lost or desensitized.  My GF definitely still has a gag reflex but significantly less than it used to be.  Years of facefucking took care of that.  Like most things, experience usually takes care of it.

That’s good to hear. I really don’t think she’ll lose it.. she gags as the thought of taking an aspirin! 
 

 

[Anon321 481]

4 hours ago, WiscoWild said:

That’s good to hear. I really don’t think she’ll lose it.. she gags as the thought of taking an aspirin! 
 

 

That sounds like a VERY sensitive gag reflex.  I am not saying she will lose it.  I don't think you would actually want to fully lose a gag reflex.  But you could desensitize it a bit.  My GF used to sometimes gag if she would deepthroat a cock or if someone would push her head down on a cock (depending on how big the cock was).  Now she doesn't gag that way at all.  She only gags from hard facefucking.  She can deepthroat dick without any problem at all and even be held down on it for awhile.  However when someone holds her head and thrusts their cock in and out of her throat she gags.  She fights through it like a trooper though because she likes getting facefucked and gagging.  But she definitely doesn't gag as much as she used to.

[WiscoWild 25]

7 minutes ago, Anon321 said:

That sounds like a VERY sensitive gag reflex.  I am not saying she will lose it.  I don't think you would actually want to fully lose a gag reflex.  But you could desensitize it a bit.  My GF used to sometimes gag if she would deepthroat a cock or if someone would push her head down on a cock (depending on how big the cock was).  Now she doesn't gag that way at all.  She only gags from hard facefucking.  She can deepthroat dick without any problem at all and even be held down on it for awhile.  However when someone holds her head and thrusts their cock in and out of her throat she gags.  She fights through it like a trooper though because she likes getting facefucked and gagging.  But she definitely doesn't gag as much as she used to.

That sounds amazing, but I’m not going there 😂. 
 

I’m comfortable where we are now! 
 

Thanks

[Anon321 481]

3 minutes ago, WiscoWild said:

That sounds amazing, but I’m not going there 😂. 
 

I’m comfortable where we are now! 
 

Thanks

You have the right attitude!  I respect that.

[KatrinaandDriverX 88]

On 1/23/2024 at 6:11 AM, WiscoWild said:

Hi! There was lots of kissing. It was really great. The women both came a couple times each. It was really playful to start, and during most of it. Towards the end we got down to business. 
 

All-in-all, it was a great experience!! 

I'm really, really happy to hear that.