How’d you word it?

[M & D 1]

Bedroom talk aside, it’s time to bring up going further. I’m trying to figure out how to do that and was wondering what you said to make your partner comfortable moving forward down the path of the lifestyle. 

[couplers 4,140]

7 hours ago, M & D said:

what you said to make your partner comfortable moving forward down the path of the lifestyle. 

"Hey Honey, I'm serious when I said that it would make me very happy and proud if you found someone to have sex with.  We can find another couple or you can choose who you want as a partner and do it however you want.  I just want you to have some fun."

 

Make it about her and how she wants to approach the lifestyle. 

 

 

[couplers 4,140]

7 hours ago, M & D said:

what you said

Sorry, once again I didn't answer the question.

 

It happened in two stages.  I was dating and having sex with David after having just broken up with my ex fiancé, but was still fucking him too.  One evening at dinner he said, "You're sleeping with Red, and I'm fine with that."  Two things of note, he said what I was doing, didn't ask, and said "sleeping," not fucking or screwing. 

 

For two years after David and I got married, I was still fucking my ex, while the guys were monogamous with me.  (I was a very busy woman keeping them both satisfied.)  I was too jealous to share.  Then a female friend complimented my husband and said it must be nice sleeping with him.  I snapped and told her it could be arranged.  When I got home I ordered my husband to have sex with her.  He didn’t mind.

Edited July 14, 2023 by couplers

[GoldCoCouple 4,014]

First: Have any talk outside of a sexual situation (i.e. no bedroom talk). Then tell her that you are interested in going further and ask if she is also interested, but make sure that she knows whatever her answer is, it's okay with you. She may (at first) say that she isn't interested, but then later change her mind once she sees that you aren't judging her, thinking she's a slut, pressuring her, or looking to find her replacement. This is why trust and love is so important in swinging. She needs to KNOW that whatever she decides is fine with you and that you are going to honor her wishes. She might also say 'lets go!'...at this point, you don't know. No matter what happens, you need to respect her choice. Take your time and don't try to rush or pressure her into what you want...this almost never works and usually leads to bigger problems down the road. Good luck and report back how things are progressing...