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Raven_and_Cade

Couples Codes to Gauge Interest

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No words would be exchanged. We felt that would be too obvious. The way we do this is to squeeze each other's thighs. If one of us do it, the other will either not respond...which meant "wait", give one squeeze back "yes!", or give two squeezes back "no". Works well. My wife actually said "oww!" once. I guess I squeezed too hard. Hmm, I wonder why that would be? .

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Yes, we use code words, too. I've written a story about meeting a single male in a bar, here is the excerpt. (Mary is my wife, Michael is the man we're meeting.

 

But after we talked for fifteen minutes, we went through our routine. “What kind of music do you like?” Mary asked Michael. This put me on alert.

“Oh, just about anything. Not a big fan of country. What about you?”

“Yeah, we’ve got a wide variety we like too. I’m a holdover from my father, he always liked Frank Sinatra.” As far as I know Big Jim hated Ol’ Blue Eyes, but it was our signal. Once Mary mentioned Sinatra, it was the same as telling me, ‘Listen, Adam, I’m hot as hell for this guy. I want to take him home right now and do him. What do you think?’

Now I had to respond. Mary always gave me a chance to veto the guy if I thought there was something wrong with him, or something I just didn’t like. If I wanted to end the evening, all I had to do was mention the Pet Shop Boys, Mary would take that as a ‘let’s not.’ But I liked Michael, I could tell they had the hots for each other, so I said, “Yeah, he’s always been one of my favorites too, for an old guy. Strangers in the Night was a great song.” By mentioning any tune by Sinatra, I’d agreed to let the night continue.

“I never could get into him,” Michael observed, thinking we were actually talking about music. He was oblivious to the notion my wife and I had had a complete conversation, and he’d been moved, seconded, and an unanimous vote taken.

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We use a physical code. One gesture means we would play. The other means we would not. One of us gives a signal first. One no vote means no.

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Since we have a 'no play on the first date' rule, it's not as important to have a signal, but if we are on that first date and either of us mention that we forgot to feed the animals (we live in the country and have chickens, ducks, and several sheep in addition to the normal list of potential animals), it is a way of saying it's time to go...not a match.

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