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intuition897

Fantasizing about 'vanilla' people

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So since we've lost a bunch of weight, we've suddenly had a whole lot more energy. And confidence. 10 years of latent horniness has reared its sleazy head and we're trying to deal with it. Needless to say, we're having LOTS more sex, which is awesome. But OMG, there's just so much overflow! It's really hard to not accidentally flirt with my male coworkers. That shit just comes so naturally to me. I can't help it. I'm in the break room at work and walk past two particularly attractive coworkers and think absently to myself, "I wouldn't mind inviting them to a spit roast." And then my eyes pop open and I hope and pray I didn't just say that out loud. If a thought bubble popped up over my head every time I had a dirty thought, I'd be fired before the morning coffee break. Hell, I'd be fired before I turned the lights on.

 

The worst is that I have to work in a close-knit office full of gossipy women and boss who is hotter than hell. Now, he's a really great guy, has a lot of integrity, and would never - NEVER - get involved with an employee - he gives me an extra-wide 4-foot bubble of personal space - and I'm 99.9% sure he and his wife are not into the lifestyle...so...unfortunately, playtime is not going to happen there. It's just distracting as hell. If I'm standing at the counter sorting paperwork and he walks past me on his way to the photocopier, I can feel the hair stand up on the back of my neck. It's ridiculous. This is like a junior-high crush. Are you laughing yet? It goes without saying that I'll have to settle for the fantasy, but I just wanted to vent my sexual frustrations. Fucking social etiquette. What a pain in the ass. Poor Mr. intuition: I am going to wear him out if we don't get out and get some play-friends soon.

 

*Sigh* I'm looking for commiserators. Anyone else out there lusting after an unattainable vanilla that you can't seem to avoid??

 

PS: I get to spend a whole 15 minutes behind a closed door with my boss for my performance review tomorrow. God help me keep my foot out of my mouth! LOL

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A few years back, I had a supervisor (female) who was charming, attractive and not in a committed relationship. I imagined a hundred ways of seducing her -- always ended with, "you idiot; what are you thinking?" I flattered myself with thoughts like, "she's flirting with me." Then I would be brought back to reality.

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If anyone wants to voice their thoughts about getting involved with people from work, I'd welcome that, too. We always say it's a bad idea to get your meat where you get your bread, but it doesn't mean we don't think about it. ;)

 

Honestly I don't have a problem with it, myself. I'm so good at compartmentalizing it's scary. I have no interest in drama and no interest in letting things get weird. No hanky-panky during office hours, of course, it would literally be business as usual. But after hours would be fine. My only concern is whether or not the other parties involved could keep their shit together. If we really thought they could handle it, we wouldn't let it stop us. Mr. intuition may be of a different mind about the matter, however, so we go with the more conservative approach.

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As I have said in another post...somewhere, I seem to be constantly wondering if complete strangers are either 1: swingers 2: would be willing to swing given the opportunity or 3: would be shocked and appalled at the mere suggestion (and then I feel sorry for them). I also find myself wondering what random people would look like without their cloths on as well (not just the 'pretty' people, just any random person). As for work, we both work in 'sensitive' jobs where if it was known what one of our hobbies was could cause serious problems at work so we keep work and play as separate as possible.

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I'll let you in on a deep secret of mine...I have always entertained fantasies that dealt with playing with fellow school mates, school instructors, and co-workers. I've done this even when I was in elementary school! :blush: For a few years now, my favorite go-to fantasy is about attending a work conference with a co-worker friend (no one in particular, a faceless person right now) and things get heated. ;)

 

So, yes, I commiserate but flirting doesn't come naturally to me so I don't worry about saying things that pop into my head.

 

Please let us know how hot and bothered your meeting was with the boss. :D

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As I have said in another post...somewhere, I seem to be constantly wondering if complete strangers are either 1: swingers 2: would be willing to swing given the opportunity or 3: would be shocked and appalled at the mere suggestion (and then I feel sorry for them). I also find myself wondering what random people would look like without their clothes on as well (not just the 'pretty' people, just any random person). As for work, we both work in 'sensitive' jobs where if it was known what one of our hobbies was, it could cause serious problems at work, so we keep work and play as separate as possible.

 

I'm glad it's not just me. Mr. intuition's workplace is "family-oriented", apparently, and he's in a leadership position, so we are sensitive about that. My workplace tends to be a little more liberal (university), and very good about equal rights, alternative lifestyles, etc. All I'd need to do is raise a stink that I was being discriminated against for something that is totally consensual and they'd just use it as an example of how they can be more tolerant and accepting.

 

I do the same thing, GoldCo, fantasizing about random people, trying to guess what goes on behind their bedroom doors. I like imagining that they're curious and want to find out more. :) I do this with so many people. I think it's one of the reasons that I've been catching the attention of others lately. When you tip a nod at someone's sexuality - regardless of who they are - you're empowering them. You're lifting them up, even at a subconscious level. They feel that. Every single person is a sexually powerful being, and to acknowledge that - to give that aspect of them the respect it deserves - makes people around you feel good and important...which they are. People are under so much pressure; the world can be a depressing, demanding place, and it leaves you feeling belittled and ashamed sometimes. I say fuck that. I'm just going to be a little ray of sunshine instead, giving people a better view of who and what they really are.

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I'll let you in on a deep secret of mine...I have always entertained fantasies that dealt with playing with fellow school mates, school instructors, and co-workers. I've done this even when I was in elementary school! :blush: For a few years now, my favorite go-to fantasy is about attending a work conference with a co-worker friend (no one in particular, a faceless person right now) and things get heated. ;)

 

So, yes, I commiserate but flirting doesn't come naturally to me so I don't worry about saying things that pop into my head.

 

Please let us know how hot and bothered your meeting was with the boss. :D

 

Well fuck. I screwed up the dates and turns out the performance review is tomorrow. I even wore my most awesome dress and heels for the occasion. On a positive note, he scheduled an entire hour. No complaints there. Spend an entire hour listening to him talk (he's got a really sexy voice)? Yes please. The problem is the gossip.

 

My other coworker had her PR today and spent the better part of an hour in there with him. Now they know each other outside of work as former schoolmates - definitely not sexual - and she's like a Disney character come to life: impossibly chipper and cheerful, and very, very chatty. So when she came out, my other coworker - the one who likes to gossip the most - asked her if her mouth was tired. Then she suddenly said, "From talking I mean! Gosh that didn't sound right did it?" Yeah, like that little quip was accidental. Totally contrived, and she probably spent the entire time titillating herself with all the scandalous possibilities. She giggled about it for the next half hour. :rollseye: I'll spend as much time in there with him as I can get away with, and if she tries to stir up some shit, I'll just tell her I was working on a promotion. Should shut her up...and make my boss blush, too. I hope so. We're a pretty informal bunch.

 

Mr. intuition and I have a rule that we don't actually play with anyone from work...although as I said, we don't have a problem with it as long everyone else can keep their shit together. But it sure is a fun thing to fantasize about. I think it's just because it's so taboo, and yet so accessible. I don't keep secrets from Mr. intuition, and I don't like secrets that can hurt anyone, but otherwise, secrets in general are a lot of fun.

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Well darn! You'll have to update us tomorrow then. :D

 

Absolutely. I'm sure I'll want to vent some of my frustrations. We're informal, but there are certain lines you don't cross...like actually flirting with your boss. You might be able to get away with a "flirt" if it's obvious it's a joke, but that's about it. There's an unwritten rule around our organization: avoid anything that even borders on impropriety. The whole good-fences-make-good-neighbours thing. I'm sure it goes on, but if it does, it's so far under the radar it's virtually invisible. Like I said, the guy is a boy scout (one of the reasons he's so likable), so I'm getting nothing here.

 

It's possible that he's oblivious to all the pheromones I'm putting out there, and he's completely unattracted to me. Perhaps I flatter myself. I don't know. And maybe he has no idea because it's so taboo to do ANYthing that would start the rumour mill that anything I might say or do is be so subtle it gets lost in translation.

 

Hey, can any of you shed some light on something? Is 'vitamin D' a euphemism for dick? If so, I think I may have accidentally made a dick reference to my boss and a coworker. We were at the company retreat and the three of us got talking as we walked from one activity to the next. We were talking about germs and various risky behaviours. My boss mentioned that he had to stop by his car for some water; he keeps a case of water there all the time. I told him, "Oh you're not supposed to drink water that's been sitting in a hot car! The shit in the plastic leaches into the water and gives you cancer." Aw, that's a bunch of crap, he says, you can go out in the sun and get skin cancer! I said, "Oh no, come on! That's just a dose of vitamin D! I'll take it!" There was a weird sort-of silence behind me (I'm walking ahead of them), making me wonder if I'd said something wrong? I might be wrong, but were they actually trying to stifle a laugh? After the weird, awkward pause, my coworker from another office speaks up and rounds off the conversation with, "Well, we all do things we're not supposed to." I just wish I could've seen their expressions so I could know whether I'd put my foot in my mouth.

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Well, it is true about the water bottle and Vitamin D from the sun! But Mr. Sun and I also use Vitamin D as doublespeak for dick as well but that's just between us. Your coworkers have their minds in the gutter. ;)

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I once had a beautiful co-worker. She was witty, intelligent, creative, and wise. Fortunately, we were both available so I married her. We spent almost thirty years together. :) At the time I was vice-president of the corporation and had a fast rule: Never date a co-worker. It took about an hour to decide that rule was a bad idea. Careful, Intuition!

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I appreciate the cautionary advice, Alura, but I truly don't have any long term interests in him, charming as he is. From what I can tell, he and his wife are like two peas in a pod, so I understand his reluctance to explore any extramarital attractions.

 

For the record, I realize it really is just fantasy; the odds of all the necessary stars and planets aligning to make it possible are almost nil. The most ideal scenario? Finding their profile on SLS. But I suspect they're 100% vanilla. Like I said, the man gives me a very wide berth, so I probably do make him uncomfortable. The way things are now...the only way this would work is if they were feeling adventurous and wanted to get dinner or drinks with Mr. intuition and me, and see if we all hit it off. We have so little in common outside the office that I just can't see that happening.

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So anyway, the update: My boy scout boss was in fine form. He stayed on his side of the desk, and I on mine. No double entendres. No subtle indications of interest whatsoever. I may have made him stumble his words a bit - perhaps a little too much direct eye contact - but I'll never know for sure. Nobody likes doing performance reviews, so we all just stumble through them, making shit up as we go along. Missed opportunity: he opened the conversation by saying, "As you know, it's annual kiss-your-butt day, where we tell you guys what a great job you're doing..." Totally could've done something with that. But as usual, I'm Monday-morning-quarterbacking it. I tried to appear very interested in what he was saying, but honestly, I can't remember half of it.

 

Ah well, I'm sure there will be other fun opportunities to enjoy a good tease. In the meantime, Mr. intuition continues to reap the benefits of my overdrive libido.

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I harbored some very vivid fantasies about a high-school teacher. She was born in Russia but was teaching us Spanish. She would bend low in front of me, her enormous boobs would half fall out of her blouse and she would speak an imperative in Spanish, "eschuchen, Miguel" meaning "listen, Michael." I would be frozen into silence thinking, "what is the Spanish way of saying 'let's fuck' "?

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Mr. intuition apparently has had his share of attention. I think he's gotten to a position in the company now where he's...less approachable. But before this, it wasn't unusual for young women to make a point of letting him know what colour thong they were wearing by bending waaaay over to pick something up. Things like that.

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A fantasy situation just came up, and he totally nixed it. We've got a storage room...in the basement...behind two locked doors...and we'd have the only key that I know of. He needed to find something down there, and I offered to go with him - because it's SO full of crap that he might have trouble finding what he was looking for, and I know where most stuff is - and he definitely did NOT want me to go with him. Not sure if he was just exercising an independent streak, or if was he trying to avoid getting himself into a situation where he had to be alone with me.

 

The fantasy is just having the quiet space to say something slightly more risque, or maybe give him a look that leaves little to the imagination. What would have really happened in the storage room: we would've hunted for the stuff, found it, and if either of us crossed into one another's personal space, we would've panicked and apologized and got the fuck out of Dodge. Toying around with not just your coworker, but your boss FFS, is dangerous as hell and not something I'm actually prepared to do.

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I believe you like living on the edge.

 

Indeed I do. If I'm not riding the ragged edge, it doesn't feel like living. It's one of the reasons that swinging appeals to me so much. We try to avoid sheer stupidity, but I personally like the risk of busting through society's red velvet ropes for the sake of meaningful connection with other human beings. We're all walking the world alone, and even though the world tells us that's the way it's supposed to be, it doesn't need to be that way. So yeah, I enjoy being connected and genuine with others whenever I can get away with it, and whenever I can coax them to be brave and join me, that's me winning. Me - 1, Society - 0.

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He doesn't trust himself alone with you in a situation like that...at least I know I wouldn't, but I would still gladly have you go with me :lol:

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He doesn't trust himself alone with you in a situation like that...at least I know I wouldn't, but I would still gladly have you go with me :lol:

 

LOL, well that right there is the difference between us and vanillas, eh? Swingers are awesome.

 

If he's that uncomfortable, I guess it's just as well that he avoids such situations. I have no intention of doing anything that would cause him to lose sleep at night or feel the flames of hell licking at his heels. That's just being an asshole, and I don't get off on making other people do things that they feel are truly wrong.

 

However, I do like prodding people outside of their comfort zones if it's simply a matter of admitting a truth. The pursuit of truth, however inconvenient, wherever it might be found, is more or less my religion. I have found this to be a real boon to my life and spiritual growth, so whenever I can, I try to share that philosophy with others. It staggers me that anyone would not see how illogical it is to ignore the truth, or pretend it isn't so.

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In this day and age, flirting can and is easily taken wrong. Being the boss and knowing that what one employee may take as a polite compliment can be taken as sexual harassment by another makes being in charge even more difficult. Sex has no place in the work place! (or so we have been told). I'm sure he's just being overly cautious...as most people are these days (it USED to be okay to say that someone looked nice today...but not any more!).

 

Swingers are just much more up front about and less afraid of their sexuality...BTW, nice cleavage ;)

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In this day and age, flirting can and is easily taken wrong. Being the boss and knowing that what one employee may take as a polite compliment can be taken as sexual harassment by another makes being in charge even more difficult. Sex has no place in the work place! (or so we have been told). I'm sure he's just being overly cautious...as most people are these days (it USED to be okay to say that someone looked nice today...but not any more!).

 

Swingers are just much more up front about and less afraid of their sexuality...BTW, nice cleavage ;)

 

LOL Why thank you! :D

 

And yes, that's exactly what it is. He's paranoid and proud of it. If he ever ran into one of us outside of work, he would literally cross the street. He does not talk much about his personal life, he keeps after-hours office social events to a minimum, and has ears like a bat when it comes to sussing out "inappropriate" office banter. The other ladies and I get shut down pretty quickly when we make any mention of the cute courier. He used to be a lot more easy going before he got promoted to this position. Maybe that's what it is: I just like the challenge. :lol:

 

Mr. intuition mentioned that he was talking to his boss; his boss was telling him about this sex club that he and his wife once went to... Huh. Interesting... ;) His boss is actually pretty cute. I wonder what his wife looks like... LOL, I'm incorrigible.

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If he ever ran into one of us outside of work, he would literally cross the street. He does not talk much about his personal life, he keeps after-hours office social events to a minimum, and has ears like a bat when it comes to sussing out "inappropriate" office banter.

 

If I lived in Canada, I'd say "Hey, I think I might be your boss!" because that's pretty much who I am at work.

 

 

So....he might be a freak after all, but only flies his flag far away from the work world. :)

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If I lived in Canada, I'd say "Hey, I think I might be your boss!" because that's pretty much who I am at work.

 

 

So....he might be a freak after all, but only flies his flag far away from the work world. :)

 

:lol: Well two4you, that definitely gives me hope! It would actually be awesome if they were in the lifestyle. You know...as long as they were as allergic to drama as we are. Even if we never made anything happen, we are so ready for like-minded social company, and he and his wife seem like a really down to earth pair of people. Honestly people can be so fucking uptight where sex is concerned. I really wish there was a way to do a Vulcan mind meld on some people so they can really understand why this is so not a big deal. They'd do a facepalm for wasting so much time/energy on jealousy and insecurity, take their pants off and say, "Where's the hot tub?"

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It's funny (but not really) that violence is so easily accepted these days and while sex is used to sell just about everything (Carl's Jr. has made hamburgers 'sexy') and how most people over the age of 18 regularly participate in (or wish they could participate) having sex, sex is something that most of the public cannot talk about. The world would be a COMPLETELY different place if the things that people thought could actually be heard by everyone...

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I second that. I truly cannot understand how a split second flash of a nipple at the Super Bowl can send a whole country into a tizzy, and then when they sit down to recover from that, they turn on the tv and watch about 15 people get blown away in just a few hours with a yawn and nary a blink of an eye. To put it bluntly, there's something seriously fucked up about that.

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I know, it's so ridiculous. Uptight, puritanical, prudish, scared-of-their-own-shadow, ignorant bullshit. It's so cool whenever you can find sex-positive people with whom to talk about all those fun things that are normal, natural and positive - things that grown-ass adults should be able to discuss among themselves without blushing or pretending they're too "pure" to know anything about...or like.

 

Want to hear a total shocker?? I once went to a "passion party" (sex toy party) with my 18 year old daughter. And my Mom. That was probably the weirdest, most awkward fucking thing I have ever done. To be honest, it was just bizarre because it was my mother, who has ever been the puritan in our family, who was actually cool with it. I was like, "Okay, wow, I'm out of here." I was weirded out. I took my daughter with me, and of course she was mightily disappointed. Mom stayed. Seriously, did she want me to say, "Oh, no I've already got one of those at home in the toy box." or "Yeah, don't buy that one, it's not waterproof and it'll just short out within a month." or maybe, "Ooooh, get that one! That thing'll make your eyes roll back in your head for fucking DAYS!" So I talk a good game about being sex-positive,but I guess I can't walk the walk. At least not where family is concerned. Sorry. I have my limitations.

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Sex is personal, violence and killing and destruction that happens to others isn't.

 

Sex is supposed to be kept in the dark and not talked about while violence starts with the 6 o'clock news and then continues into most every other TV show for the rest of the night.

 

Didn't say it was right, just that it is.

 

It's HARD to be honest and open and talk about these things because it IS personal.

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I know, it's so ridiculous. Uptight, puritanical, prudish, scared-of-their-own-shadow, ignorant bullshit. It's so cool whenever you can find sex-positive people with whom to talk about all those fun things that are normal, natural and positive - things that grown-ass adults should be able to discuss among themselves without blushing or pretending they're too "pure" to know anything about...or like.

 

Want to hear a total shocker?? I once went to a "passion party" (sex toy party) with my 18 year old daughter. And my Mom. That was probably the weirdest, most awkward fucking thing I have ever done. To be honest, it was just bizarre because it was my mother, who has ever been the puritan in our family, who was actually cool with it. I was like, "Okay, wow, I'm out of here." I was weirded out. I took my daughter with me, and of course she was mightily disappointed. Mom stayed. Seriously, did she want me to say, "Oh, no I've already got one of those at home in the toy box." or "Yeah, don't buy that one, it's not waterproof and it'll just short out within a month." or maybe, "Ooooh, get that one! That thing'll make your eyes roll back in your head for fucking DAYS!" So I talk a good game about being sex-positive,but I guess I can't walk the walk. At least not where family is concerned. Sorry. I have my limitations.

 

I would bet that your mom didn't really talk all that much about sex with you or openly disapproved of sex outside of marriage? Mine did and still does so there's no way I would be going to a sex toy party/store/anything with her. She even views masturbation as wrong. I think it really depends on how the other person has behaved when it comes to sex talk with you personally in order for it to be awesome or awkward.

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I would bet that your mom didn't really talk all that much about sex with you or openly disapproved of sex outside of marriage? Mine did and still does so there's no way I would be going to a sex toy party/store/anything with her. She even views masturbation as wrong. I think it really depends on how the other person has behaved when it comes to sex talk with you personally in order for it to be awesome or awkward.

 

You'd be right on the mark about that. I wasn't even allowed to use tampons because they would "ruin" me. Her words. Ruin me. :rolleyes:

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You'd be right on the mark about that. I wasn't even allowed to use tampons because they would "ruin" me. Her words. Ruin me. :rolleyes:

 

Ugh! I can't imagine going through periods without tampons....

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No fantasies about the delivery man here, but because of a stroke I had, I see a logopedist every week and MsD and I would not mind if she crossed ethical borders and went home with us and did more oral instructions :)

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NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

 

This thread is taking a terrible turn for the worse...Look, there's Intuitions cleavage!

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Okay, GoldCo! I know this thread is about the boss-employee fantasy...what about professor-student fantasy? Who else has that fantasy besides me?

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Me sunbuckus! I'm normally the professor. Haha I'm a take charge kind of girl in the bedroom. I like doing the seducing. :P

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I've never ever pictured myself as the professor role...probably because I don't have the patience to teach others. :lol:

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I have never been able to pull off looking cute and innocent. Everyone thinks I'm so serious and...I dunno...authoritative or something. So whether I like it or not, I guess I'm always the teacher. But I guess I'm okay with that. I used to work in an academic department at the university...in an administration job, but whatever. There were a few students I wouldn't have minded keeping after class. ;)

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An update on the hot-boss situation: the bastard got a job somewhere else. This is really disappointing, for more than just the obvious reason. He is absolutely the best boss I have ever worked for (ever), and he is a genuinely nice guy to boot. I'm sure the prick won't add any of us to Facebook, because that's the way he is. So come February 19, he essentially drops off the face of the Earth. *sigh* Dammit. There goes the only source of testosterone in the office. I know this might rub some people the wrong way, but I genuinely prefer working with men instead of women. I'll take the burping and fart jokes any day over catty, petty, bitchy in-fighting and one-upmanship.

 

I'm praying his replacement isn't a complete and utter asshole.

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:( I'm sorry your hot eye-candy of a boss will be leaving. I hope an equally hot or even more hot boss comes your way!

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Okay, GoldCo! I know this thread is about the boss-employee fantasy...what about professor-student fantasy? Who else has that fantasy besides me?

 

Some of us made good on that fantasy in college. :facelick:

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intuition897, I have enjoyed reading this thread! There are many of your comments here that I wanted to like, and one in particular that I wanted to find a "WTF?" button to click instead of a "like" (tampons will "ruin you"?? WTF?). But mainly I wanted to "like" you generally! You gotta look us up if you ever find yourself in the Baltimore/DC area.

 

On your topic, you bet I've fantasized about some people at work. I have one (female) vanilla friend at work, who is very open and unaffected. We talk about sex without awkwardness. She is the one and only vanilla person who we have discussed our lifestyle with. So the idea of playing with her has definitely entered my mind! And I've asked her if swinging is something she'd be interested in trying, but she told me this she "doesn't like to share". C'est la vie!

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Couple: There are three that I can find. Type the colon (:) and then either wft / wtf3 / wtf4 followed by another colon will get you the following:

 

:wtf:

:wtf3:

:wtf4:

:wtf2:

 

As for Intuition: Here's your chance to tease the hell out of the guy since you know that he is leaving. Flash him a sexy smile (or flash him something else). He's going to be gone soon so you don't have to worry about what might happen if something were to happen after it happens (if it were to happen).

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Hummm, I tried entering :wtf2: in the previous post just to see if there was one (there's a 3 and a 4) but nothing happened. Still, you get to see the format now.

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