Is just FMF ok?

[Hippiegirlie 276]

And I bet you are sane, well adjusted, attractive, and not out to break up anyone marriage either....

Thank you. I am quite sane. I choose to be single because of my recognition of who I am as a person, not because I have to be. I do not have a short history in the lifestyle and I have not changed my opinion of where I want to be. I'm well educated (2 masters, almost a third on route to my PhD). I may not be everyone's "type" but that would hold true for any person in any situation. I am completely self-sufficient and self-fulfilled. Why would I try to break up a marriage if I choose to be single?

That being said, I also recognize that those other personalities are out there in ALL forms. Males, females, married, single, bi, straight, gay... universal traits of humanity. There will always be people who simply do not match well with others for whatever reason. So, the statements about single bi-females having the ability to have those traits are just as true. Whether there is a higher concentration within the swinging community I am not sure. I think the sane approach is to look at the reason why a person gets into this lifestyle to begin with and then base reaction from that. If a single female decides to swing because she is missing something from her life, say, intimate connection, then she very well may find what she desires in seeing a married woman with her husband and desire that. If a single woman decides to swing because she feels that she is "too good" for one man (or woman) alone and should be shared so everyone gets the benefit of her amazing self, then she would be seen to some as egotistical, but she would be seen as that by some is a non-swinging atmosphere also. If a single female is not sane, then she is not sane, regardless of what sexual path she chooses for herself. Single females are certainly not the only insane people in the lifestyle. I can tell you as a single female I get some pretty insane emails from single men and couples as well. I choose to swing because I enjoy meeting people and sharing in the giving and receiving of sexual pleasure. I do not relate sexual pleasure to intimacy; the two are quite different things in my mind. To some, that may make me insane or even egotistical, but it is who I am and I state it upfront and blatantly. I am who I am. No apologies.

I greatly appreciate ALL responses and this conversation. I would never be offended by another person's point of view. I look at it as a learning opportunity.

[Chicup 38]

I actually agree with you. This thread was about single females, so that was the focus, but you are correct that everyone (swinger or otherwise, really) fits into 1 of those 5 types. And, I still say that what may be considered a perfect unicorn to one may be "batshit crazy" to another (or vice versa).

 

I think the difference is that only the single female can get away with being a 1-5 and still get laid, especially in swinging.

 

An ugly single male, or a batshit insane couple is going to run into a brick wall pretty quick.

[Alura 2,766]

...so your accusations seem a bit moot

 

From The Concise Oxford Dictionary:

 

moot, n., a., & v.t. 1. (Hist) assembly; (law) students' discussion of hypothetical case for practice. 2. adj. Debatable (freq. ~point). 3. v.t. Raise (question) for discussion. ...

[two4youinswva 3,067]

Wait a minute: You mean some of you play with crazy?

I was always told, and it's a well known meme that you Never Stick Your Dick In Crazy.

Ever.

[D&D 362]

I actually agree with you. This thread was about single females, so that was the focus, but you are correct that everyone (swinger or otherwise, really) fits into 1 of those 5 types. And, I still say that what may be considered a perfect unicorn to one may be "batshit crazy" to another (or vice versa).

 

You are right about "ones persons crazy is another person's unicorn." The list is really about how each of us perceives the other not how the person really is. iv changed my mind about many people after getting to know them, sometimes for the better and sometimes for the worse..

[mauijanedoe 1,414]

Wait a minute: You mean some of you play with crazy?

I was always told, and it's a well known meme that you Never Stick Your Dick In Crazy.

Ever.

 

I don't have a dick and I do play with crazy, although I no longer allow relationships with it. It does appear that the strength of attraction correlates to the depth of crazy. As Mr. Doe and I say in concert, after one of our ex-girlfriends come up in conversation, "But the sex was great. Heh.

[Chicup 38]

Someone has left the building

[SW_PA_Couple 4,019]

Someone has left the building

Elvis?

[Hippiegirlie 276]

Playing with crazy equates to playing with bad boys or bad girls. Fun for a bit, but not fun for life.

[JM153 346]

Getting back to the original OP and his question, I think the suggestion that look for a couple for your wife to have an FMF with is a great idea for how to get started. Join some of the lifestyle sites and put that has what you are looking for. I would suggest you be present, but plan on not participating. These things once started sometimes expand and it may be the two women will decide to do you as well. Good luck. And oh by the way most of the time threads are not hijacked, so come on back and post your questions or observations. I think you will find there is a wealth of knowledge and experience on this board and the folks are willing to share with you.