Reasons for NOT using condoms for swinging?

[Spoomonkey 418]

What we have noticed is more of a general complaint: "Damn condoms," the other couple will say. That may or may not lead to a discussion about them. We have heard the "sensation excuse" before - but honestly, we share that gripe ourselves, so we have never seen it as a line at all.

 

The first time we played without them, it was in a MFF and I was concerned about the logistics of having to take it off and put in on - and back and forth - as I switched between wife and playmate. It was really nice to play that way, but I have learned in subsequent MFFs that it really isn't that big a deal. The condoms go on quite easily - and the wood works quite well

 

The next time, we just felt really good about the couple and felt like "what the heck are we worried about with these guys?" They didn't try to sell us, they just put their preference out there.

 

The only other time - we were playing with a repeat couple and there was simply a chemistry in the room that could have set off a smoke alarm. It was probably a lusty decision, but it was a weird, simultaneous four-way decision to fore go the condoms...

 

We've had other couples hint around about it - but oddly they have always been "frst time" playmates who we have had no other history with. No excuses - just a "gee, you guys ever play without?"

 

For some reason, that is a real turn off when that happens...

 

Respect our boundaries and who knows how far we'll go. Shamelessly test our boundaries and the forecast calls for chilly...

[good times 990]

We can't really say we have ever received any excuses, but then again, it has been a long time since we required condom use. I can comment from the other side of the fence, as someone who prefers not to use condoms. First, I have to say that we don't give excuses, because for it to be an excuse we would have to have something we were doing wrong that we would need an excuse for. Since condom use is purely a matter of personal choice, the right or wrong of it is only in the eyes of the beholder. If the subject comes up though, we have no problem giving someone our reasons for preferring not to use condoms, but they are only our reasons, and we in no way intend for them to be excuses. Nor am I giving my reasons to try to change someone’s mind to get him or her to do something they don't feel comfortable doing. I do not ask people who insist on condoms what their excuse is for using them, if I do ask it is simply to know what their reasoning is behind the decision.

 

Before we play with someone new, we always ask if they require condoms to be used. If they do, we use condoms, no more needs to be said. If they ask us first, our standard response is, "we usually don't use condoms but if you would prefer that we do use them, we have no problem with that". If they then ask us why we don't require condom use, we grab a chair and sit down for "the condom discussion". Their are many reasons why we don't prefer to use condoms that range from our belief that the supposed protection they offer isn't supported by the research evidence, to the fact that they do, in fact, reduce the physical sensation enough that the sex is less enjoyable. Most of my reasoning can be gleaned from reading my posts to the many condom related threads, so I won't repeat them here.

 

So the next time you have someone tell you their reasons why they don't want to use condoms, keep in mind that their reasons are just as valid as yours are for using them. Do not compromise your beliefs though, if you feel you need to use them, insist on it. It is true some people will refuse to play with you if you insist on condom use, but that is far better than to compromise and regret it.

[paradiseclubcpl 27]

We don't use condoms, we are exclusive with our couple. AKA poly

[TravlParty 87]

the supposed protection they offer isn't supported by the research evidence

 

Exactly, enough said.

[Spokaneman 15]

Exactly, enough said.

 

I agree here as well. Me and my wife don't like the sensation loss and we don't find them to be worth it overall. There are plenty of better forms of BC that don't take away sensation.

As far as STDs, make sure you and the people you plan to swing with have been checked and get checked often, otherwise it is always gonna be a risk... it is sex, it is never safe lol. Want safe sex... do it over the phone lol.

 

One thing that always surprises me is how many people will wear and swear by condoms and then give oral sex!!!! lol /boggle

[Mr.Essex 264]

I don't play without condoms. Period.

 

That being said, three things would have to happen before I changed my mind and engaged in unprotected sex

 

1. We'd have to live in a rural, low-population area. (If I'm living in a big city, I'd be too afraid of temptation on the behalf of all parties)

2. We'd have to receive a full STD test, supplemented by blood donation to screen out the less-common bugs.

3. We'd have to be faithful. Not in a "Romeo and Juliet" kind of way, but more of a "You're literally the only people who we can rely on" way. If I started to engage in unprotected sex, I'd do it with people who I could be sure (enough) wouldn't go out and bring diseases back into the "family".

[ratimadan 75]

We "always" use condoms when we exchange partners and have penile-vaginal intercourse with another couple's mate/spouse. The only exception is when we absolutely trust the couple, have known them for a period of time, and are certain that they don't have STD and neither the male or female is fertile, so as to preclude pregenancy.

 

Having said that, it's a fact that wearing a condom takes away the sensation, i.e., the transmission of the warmth and the interplay of the juices from the woman's vagina to your penis when you penetrate her vagina with your organ during intercourse.

 

So we could say that we use condoms always, i.e., 99.99% of the time when we have have sexual intercourse with, or, fuck another couple's mate.

[Speed & Trixie 162]

Well... In our personal sex lives Trixie and I do not use condoms... I think we did for a few at the start of our relationship, 7 years ago! But as we grew we came to know that each of us is clean, and she is on the pill. So We voted "Other". Knowing that each other is clean is the biggest thing, then having her on the pill is a damn close second. We do not wish to ever have children so that is a big concern. Therefore... use of a condom is not needed. Plus, it does kill quite a bit of sensation.

 

Now, if we were to meet up with another lady I'm sure I will be using a condom for intercourse with her. Not to make the assumption that she is "dirty" or anything like that, but... she is not my partner of 7 years. Trixie and I will both agree to the use of a condom. I know it might make for a bit of fuss during a 3-way scenario, but it is what we want. At least until we have developed a relationship with our new friend and have come to realize that she is clean and is using some sort of birth control.

[2plus2fun 143]

I am curious how many condom users here also engage in oral sex with no condom... you can catch all of the same shit that way as you do with vaginal intercourse.

 

We use condoms on request... but usually we don't. We don't play with many people though either and we get tested regularly.

[Guest Trellken]

We don't need them as my girl has had her tubes tied, we have no fear of one of us having an STD and we don't engage in penetrative sex with anyone else.

[Tina and Bob 236]

Most times condoms are involved except with close friends

[Palladin 36]

Just thought I would throw in a twister.

 

Even if a woman is on birth control or has her tubes tied, a practicing Catholic man is expected to remain open to life and refrain from condoms (for health reasons). LOL! Yes, we do believe in miracles.

 

I suspect Catholic swingers have to practice a certain amount of exclusivity with like-minded couples and probably would not be welcome in large group-swaps?

[prairieshadows 95]

We just don't like condoms. But that's us. He's had a vasectomy, plus we lose the sensation when using condoms.

[bimarriedguy82 17]

My wife and I never use condoms with each other. She is on the pill. Most of the threesomes we do are with people we know well and trust, so we go bare. Not only does she love the feeling, so do the guys, and I love watching it. We are into creampies too.

[Beach Bums 15]

We are not fans of condoms either. I have a latex allergy so it could be deadly for me. I rely on my iud for pregnancy concerns.

[StewartP 171]

I have had a vasectomy, but Fiona takes no birth control at all, so when we are with others we insist on condoms.

 

ps We have stopped telling our french friends about my vasectomy. They do not understand t all and think it is weird. They think it is emasculating and it is a VERY rare procedure in France

[M1F2KTJ 470]

I voted loss of sensation. There is nothing that compares to feeling a woman skin on skin.

[toronto two 17]

Her telling me she feels warm inside as he fills her up is pleasure for both of us!!!!!!!