Varying levels of bisexual

[SecretAsianMan 348]

A discussion question that I had with a friend of mine the other day brought up an interesting topic which I figure would be fun to talk about...

 

There really should be differing "levels" of bisexuality for people to identify themselves as in this world...

 

For example, my friend is fully bisexual and will have sex and date either gender.

 

I have another friend, however, who will have sex with people of either gender... but would only "date" (& get into romantic relationships) with men.

 

And I know plenty of people who typically identify themselves as heterosexual, but will engage in limited sexual contact with members of the same sex (i.e., women who will receive oral sex from another gal - but aren't comfortable reciprocating ... but will kiss & fondle).

 

Then there are those who aren't picky about the gender of their partners - as long as their specific sexual actions still remain within their comfort-zones (i.e., a guy who'll get oral sex from another guy and will give penetrative sex (anal) to another guy -- but does not give oral nor receive anal... thereby maintaining his "male"-role even in what would be defined as a homosexual encounter)

 

What do y'all think??

[Tia Vampire 167]

I've been asking my gay guy friends this same question for years. I feel that if a guy is attracted to another guy in anyway, receiving or giving, then he is gay. They (my gay guy friends) tell me that a hole is a hole no matter who it is on. Guys and girls all feel the same. That's why it's so easy for a guy who only gives, not feel he is gay. As for the women they could not commit. I, the female half do not know where I would fit in at in your many categories. I will only be with another woman if she or I wears a strap-on. I do not give oral or like to receive oral from a woman. I will kiss, caress, and fondle her, but I do not want her to touch me down there. Some women don't mind my ways, but there are others that will not be with me because I will not go down on them.

 

So I guess it is safe to say that everyone has their likes and dislikes.

[Rackir 159]

I like the Kinsey scale. On one end you have "straight", meaning the person ONLY has ANY sexual attraction to members of the opposite sex. So if a guy only enjoys receiving oral sex from another guy, but not giving, he still doesn’t qualify as straight.

 

On the other end of the scale you have gay, meaning the person ONLY has ANY sexual attraction to members of the same sex. So if a lady mainly has relationships with other woman, and only enjoys men in threesome situations, nope, she doesn’t qualify as gay.

 

The other 8 points on the scale are the various graduations of bisexuality. Smack dab in the middle would be a person who feels completely equal amounts of attraction to both genders (or some of the other often neglected genders) completely equally.

 

According to some studies most people fall one or two points away from straight or gay. Now if only more of them would admit it and stop with this whole "I'm straight but I like to have a guy suck my dick" nonsense.

[mixtupcpl 169]

I have gay friends who only give anal and some who do not have ANY anal in their relationship AT ALL.

 

So I think it is a good point that it must be about attraction. I don't want anyone I'm not attracted to sucking my dick or jerking me off, etc. Consequently, there isn't a scenario where I would accept a guy doing those things for me as I've never met a guy I feel attracted to.

 

Now I suppose some guys may be able to totally detach and say they aren't "attracted" to the guy that is giving them head, but yet still want that to happen and still enjoy it. In a scenario that doesn't involve a prison, I'm not sure what to make of that really. They may be in denial and suppressing feelings of attraction, or they may just be sort of hyper sexual and able to view a blowjob as a blowjob no matter who it comes from.

[SecretAsianMan 348]

I guess what I was going for was more along the lines of an expanded vocabulary or additional terms (which aren't quite so awkward as "bisexual with such-and-such limitations" etc.)

 

I know the Kinsey-scale ... (or at least, the early versions of the Kinsey Scale - I thought it was a 6-Point system) ...but even that doesn't really cover the specifics that I'm talking about.

 

If someone says they're a 3 on a zero to eight scale... does that really explain anything short of having a sexual skew closer to fully bisexual? ((*shrug*))

 

And *is* there a differentiation in anyone's mind between someone who will have sex with people of either gender but will be only be in romantic relationships with one gender?

 

((shrug))

[Rackir 159]

Gotcha! Your looking for a more descriptive naming system.

 

I hear ya, the phrase "bi" is so broad it really only gives a general gist of what the person might actually feel. Maybe that should be added to the name tag system.

 

Hi, I'm "Rack", "Married" "Male", "Bi:4", LF "F, MF, M".

[Karmickiss 28]

Hello All,

 

I am fully enjoying being back around here...so nice to be able to think about and respond to questions posed here, it feels great to be so genuine. I am pretty genuine anyway, once I start getting to know a person, but find there are lot's of assumptions until then.

 

Great question about levels of bi-sexuality. I guess I always or for the longest time since coming to terms with my bi-sexuality, felt I would probably be smack in the middle of this question. I would have sex with and/or date romantically either gender, it all really depends on the individual, the chemistry, and personality.

 

I do have one area of I guess, "limitation" with this I didn't realize until reading this thread. I also adore transgendered, MTF individuals, again depending on the person. I dated a bi male who was in the middle of her transformation, and she was all woman to me...interesting. However, for whatever reason, I usually am not attracted to the really "butch" lesbians...and I don't know why. I don't feel repulsed, I have a couple friends like this and love them deeply as people. And there are exceptions to this!! Some women can pull it off better...but have still maintained a certain femininity.

 

I guess it even bothers me a little, because truthfully, most likely I would not be attracted in the same way to transgender FTM...the way MTF can really be a turn-on for me. I know I have said there's something that is hard for me to accept if I feel (maybe because of personal experiences, biasing my views) a woman is afraid of or despises and butchers all femininity in herself. Wow, this is giving me some good insight...because with men living as women, I see it more as a celebration of who they are...but I totally see the double standard there!

 

I think I'm going to enjoy continuing to read the responses to this thread. Attraction is attraction, and I feel I can love all people's and don't look downwards on anyone, that much I can say. Being truthful, though, my gut attractions feel just as strong to men and women...and even with the very manly women I feel that no matter what I'd try to remain open...I believe it could happen...it's just thinking about when I say I have no "type"...(meaning I could really fall for anyone, if I fell for the person inside the skin) that there does seem to be one place I don't feel naturally "compelled" to...but surely, it has something to do with me, not anyone else.

 

I've rambled quite enough...thanks all for sharing, Best, Karmic

[Rackir 159]

SecretAsianMan said:

I know the Kinsey-scale ... (or at least, the early versions of the Kinsey Scale - I thought it was a 6-Point system)

((shrug))

 

Yup, it is a 6 point. I was misremembering. Thanks for prompting me to refresh that one!

[Rackir 159]

I guess it even bothers me a little, because truthfully, most likely I would not be attracted in the same way to transgender FTM...the way MTF can really be a turn-on for me. I know I have said there's something that is hard for me to accept if I feel (maybe because of personal experiences, biasing my views) a woman is afraid of or despises and butchers all femininity in herself. Wow, this is giving me some good insight...b/c with men living as women, I see it more as a celebration of who they are...but I totally see the double standard there!

 

Hiya Karmic.

 

So if I'm reading this right, you're concerned that you may be a bit closed-minded because there is one particular avenue of transgendered individuals that you may not be attracted to? Hunny, I think as far as being seriously open-minded goes, you're doing pretty damned good!

 

I know what you mean though, whenever I come across anything that I am categorically not into it always makes me feel a little like "wow, check out my bias".

 

But then everyone has things they are and are not attracted to. You are going the extra mile by trying to determine what it is about that group that doesn't do it for you. In doing so you may find that the thing that turns you off (or at least fails to turn you on) may in fact not be shared by all within that group, and so you may wind up being more open still as time goes on. At least I know that's how it usually goes for me.

[TheLorax 173]

I consider myself bisexual not so much because I am happy to have sex with someone of any gender, but because the person's gender isn't relevant regarding with whom I'd have sex! I get attracted to who a person is, the whole package (so to speak ), so the plumbing bits just aren't that important to me.

 

Somewhat similar to Karmic, I find transgendered people more interesting in general, especially people who are transitioning. I've often said that while I am definitely male, internally I'm more gender neutral. While I have no interest in transitioning to being female since I am reasonably happy with the equipment I have, if I ever were to have some type of accident that emasculated me, I just might.

[TheLorax 173]

 

"D&D Free","D&D Free","D&D Free",.,Damn, what do swingers have against Dungeons and Dragons anyways?

 

You're reading it wrong. It means they play Dungeons and Dragons for free.

 

Code for the fact they are in the Lifestyle. The SCA lifestyle, that is...

[Rackir 159]

You're reading it wrong. It means they play Dungeons and Dragons for free.

 

Code for the fact they are in the Lifestyle. The SCA lifestyle, that is...

 

Wow, a swingers SCA event! Now THAT would be fun!

 

We now return you to your regularly scheduled thread.

[Karmickiss 28]

Hi Rackir, it's a pleasure to read your post...it had me giggling, I feel like you probably have a nice sense of humor, and I appreciate the comments Also I like what TheLorax had to say about equipment being secondary and also can identify with feeling internally more neutral...or even a bit more on the masculine side inside, if that makes sense.

 

On the outside, I appear very feminine, with an edge maybe, but play up my femininity, working with whatever I got...lol. My late partner that I was with for quite a while, on the outside, was very alpha male. What is interesting, though, was that he felt much more feminine than masculine on the inside. He was older than me...and said if he would have been born much later, that he'd probably have elected for bi-sexual, but felt he had to uphold a certain "role" throughout his life, except for the last years that we shared together. Also, at home we very much had the stereotyped gender "roles" reversed, and outward appearances were often very misleading.

 

This has been an interesting and revealing thread for me, a good place to be starting out again, to make new connections. I very much like the overall attitude and vibe here, and appreciate everyone's thoughts. Sincerely, Kamic

[SecretAsianMan 348]

Yay me... I now feel like I've started an interesting thread. (*grins*)

 

 

And a swinger-SCA event would be different than every other SCA event I've been to (where it seems like I end up in some crazy half-drunken orgy) in what way exactly?? (*Laughing*)

[LagniappeDC 313]

We often describe Mrs. L as "bi-comfortable" - Her focus is clearly having fun with men, but has no problem dancing, kissing, and generally playing with another woman in the fun of the moment. Only one woman has given her oral, and she has not reciprocated. We are very honest and up-front about this so as to not lead anyone on or create false expectations. Mrs. L will often point out other women when I ask "who is the hottest in the room". LOL. So...yes, we wish lifestyle sites would have more flexibility in the bi vs. straight category.

[mixtupcpl 169]

And *is* there a differentiation in anyone's mind between someone who will have sex with people of either gender but will be only be in romantic relationships with one gender?

 

((shrug))

 

Definitely a great thread... What do you mean by differentiation in this context? It's most likely a very personal thing that will differ by individual.

 

For me, I would differentiate. I would consider someone open to an actual romantic relationship with either gender definitely bi-sexual. Someone for whom only sex would apply, to me, is something else, but I just don't know what Aren't labels great!

[Chicup 41]

I only think about if from a swinging standpoint.

 

Who a person wants to have a relationship with instead of just sex is irrelevant because we are not going to have a relationship beyond friendly via swinging.

 

So it comes down to who you do. If as a man you only do women = straight, both = bi, men = gay.

 

Now a bi man might say they only give or only receive or only do bj's etc, but that's irrelevant. No different than a woman saying she won't do anal, doesn't do BJ's or really likes doggy style. You are only talking about a preference sexually, it's a what not a who, and the who determines your sexuality.

[SheLovesTheSun 40]

What an interesting thought! It makes a lot of sense, especially in this lifestyle.

[mixtupcpl 169]

That is a really good way to net things out. At the end of the day, many guys are simply not open in any way to any sexual contact with another man (I put myself in this category). Anyone who is, from a 'brass tacks' perspective, is "bi-sexual"

 

But I think the nuances come in when you want to explore the subtleties of all the folks who have now slid over to that "bi" category

 

I really do think there is a difference between someone who, in the heat of the moment, might "dabble" in bisexuality, but would never form a primary relationship with someone of the same gender and someone who truly ignores gender when it comes to finding a partner.

 

It's probably a LOT easier to imagine with women (for the average guy like me ). Lots of women seem open to a little "girl play" when things are getting freaky. But the vast majority of them wouldn't start exclusively dating a woman and exclude men. I do know women, however, who have done just that. Have actually switched back and forth based purely on who appealed to them and have, at different times in their life, functioned as straight, while at other times have functioned as, essentially, lesbians.

[SecretAsianMan 348]

True... in a pure "swinger" environment where the interaction is purely about sex - then the definitions become more cut-n-dry.

 

While there's no REAL need to define it all or put labels on everything ... I think it's part of human nature to do so in this day & age.

 

I personally used to identify myself as purely heterosexual ... however, as time has moved on and I've experienced different things in life (including a couple of 3-somes with bisexual couples) ... I still think of myself as "straight" ... but others might refer to this as a situational bisexuality (hetero-flexible?)

 

(((shrug)))

 

And as I was talking to one of my gal-friend who'd have sexual relations with both men & women (but only get involved in heterosexual relationships) ... we discovered that there wasn't a term in our vocabulary for that. Bisexual just didn't seem to fit.

[xxxboxy 139]

When Mrsxxxboxy and I have discussed this I've used a taxonomy that identifies who the bisexual person has a stronger affinity for i.e.; "bisexual--primary same" would mean that they're bisexual but have an affinity for same sex relationships or "bisexual--neutral" means that they have a seeming equal affinity for same sex or opposite sex relationships etc.

[SecretAsianMan 348]

Ah ... I see

 

(My inner geek is going to REALLY show here - forgive me)

 

Sort of like the alignment classes in the AD&D game. Lawful-Good / Lawful-Neutral / Lawful-Evil ... Neutral-Good / Neutral / Neutral-Evil ... Chaotic-Good / Chaotic-Neutral / Chaotic-Evil.

 

The geek in me likes that idea... now to just fill in the right terms for sex-alignments. (*chuckles*)

[CXXC 435]

Here is a little test I have found that helps put a degree of sexual orientation for the individual. I think it helped Mrs. CXXC come to terms with how she viewed sex before we entered the Lifestyle.

 

Epstein Sexual Orientation Inventory (ESOI)

[SecretAsianMan 348]

CXXC said:

Here is a little test I have found that helps put a degree of sexual orientation for the individual. I think it helped Mrs. CXXC come to terms with how she viewed sex before we entered the Lifestyle.

 

Epstein Sexual Orientation Inventory (ESOI)

 

Interesting...

 

On their Zero to Thirteen Scale... I scored at 3 (with a range of 4... so I range from 1 to 5 as far as sexual flexibility goes.)

[Chicup 41]

CXXC said:

Here is a little test I have found that helps put a degree of sexual orientation for the individual. I think it helped Mrs. CXXC come to terms with how she viewed sex before we entered the Lifestyle.

 

Epstein Sexual Orientation Inventory (ESOI)

 

First time I took it a few months back I was a 0, this time I was a .5. I tend to not dream about sex with women as often as I did, so apparently that makes me .5 more homosexual

[Rackir 159]

CXXC said:

Here is a little test I have found that helps put a degree of sexual orientation for the individual. I think it helped Mrs. CXXC come to terms with how she viewed sex before we entered the Lifestyle.

 

Epstein Sexual Orientation Inventory (ESOI)

 

That's awesome! Now I have to change my name tag to read;

Hello I'm: Rack.

Status: Married.

Orientation: Bi: 5.5 (with range of 11).

Looking for: f, mf, m.

[Rackir 159]

First time I took it a few months back I was a 0, this time I was a .5. I tend to not dream about sex with women as often as I did, so apparently that makes me .5 more homosexual

 

Embrace your inner gay Chicup .

[xxxboxy 139]

A 0 with a range of 0....must be hetero-flexible or something...

[TheLorax 173]

That's awesome! Now I have to change my name tag to read;

Hello I'm: Rack.

Status: Married.

Orientation: Bi: 5.5 (with range of 11).

Looking for: f, mf, m.

 

Hey! That's what I got!

 

[PB&J 1,086]

Hey, apparently yesterday was "National Celebrate Bisexuality Day", according to Craig Ferguson.

[ClosetSwinger 112]

I recently have actually been struggling with WHAT to call myself.

 

I LOVE men (I'm a woman btw lol). I like women. I enjoy sex with a women but have never been able to "finish" with a woman. I NEED a man to be there to watch me and the girl go at it and then finish me off.

 

Granted this has all evolved because when we first started this lifestyle I was kind of scared of girls. Who knows a year from now I may change my mind. lol

[CXXC 435]

I recently have actually been struggling with WHAT to call myself.

 

I LOVE men (I'm a woman btw lol). I like women. I enjoy sex with a women but have never been able to "finish" with a woman. I NEED a man to be there to watch me and the girl go at it and then finish me off.

 

Granted this has all evolved because when we first started this lifestyle I was kind of scared of girls. Who knows a year from now I may change my mind. lol

 

I am not a Doctor nor do I play one on TV but, I would have to ask a question or two.

 

You sound like a lesbian friend of mine who REALLY enjoys receiving oral sex from either man or a woman but is unable to cum if a man is going down on her.

 

She has even seen a sex therapist about it. She and her partner like a little cock once in a while so they have a boy toy they call in. So far, the only thing they have figured out is that she is not completely relaxed or comfortable with the fact that a man is doing it.

 

The same may be true for you in that your bi-sexual activities have only been a year or so old. Perhaps you are not completely comfortable with that aspect of human sexuality! Not being bi is not a crime. Just try to think about why you engage in sexual congress with another woman. Is it for your pleasure or the pleasure of your husband? It should be for you above and beyond anyone else.

[DigginIt 1,132]

We often describe Mrs. L as "bi-comfortable" - Her focus is clearly having fun with men, but has no problem dancing, kissing, and generally playing with another woman in the fun of the moment.

 

Mrs. Diggs profile stats bi because she clearly has no issue with going down on another woman or having another woman satisfy her. We like 'bi-comfortable' or 'bi-selective' because she really has to have the attraction first but when the attraction is there then watch out because she will go after a woman with the same enthusiasm as any male.

 

Here is an alternate question. Right after hitting that point where she climaxes she WANTS intercourse right away.

 

The women that are more towards the lesbian side of the scale. Is this you? Even if it's just a dildo or a strap-on, do you want the intercourse or are you just happy to bask in the afterglow at that point?

 

Curious minds want to know.

[ClosetSwinger 112]

CXXC said:

I am not a Doctor nor do I play one on TV but, I would have to ask a question or two.

 

You sound like a lesbian friend of mine who REALLY enjoys receiving oral sex from either man or a woman but is unable to cum if a man is going down on her.

 

She has even seen a sex therapist about it. She and her partner like a little cock once in a while so they have a boy toy they call in. So far, the only thing they have figured out is that she is not completely relaxed or comfortable with the fact that a man is doing it.

 

The same may be true for you in that your bi-sexual activities have only been a year or so old. Perhaps you are not completely comfortable with that aspect of human sexuality! Not being bi is not a crime. Just try to think about why you engage in sexual congress with another woman. Is it for your pleasure or the pleasure of your husband? It should be for you above and beyond anyone else.

 

I think part of it is that I was raised in a very religious household where sex before marriage was considered HORRIBLE. So you can imagine how bi-sexuality, or anything beyond that was looked at. I do it because I enjoy it.

 

Rest assured my husband and I BOTH enjoy the girl/girl aspect of the lifestyle. I wouldn't do it if I was not comfortable and he has NEVER pushed me. I really enjoy knowing that he is watching and getting turned on watching me, makes me TINGLY. ? There is something incredibly exciting to me about sharing another woman with him.

[gsu22 187]

I normally label myself just as bi-oral...love sucking dick and getting sucked by another guy as a change from a woman sometimes...but that's it. Not into anal, kissing, etc....just 69'ing and on my knees...jacking off together is fun too.

[funfiend69 16]

I always thought the term "situationally bi" describes me well. I wouldn't date a guy and I'm not much for kissing guys, but I just get turned on by sucking cock, especially if a lady is watching

[Miss Behaven 16]

I always thought the term "situationally bi" describes me well. I wouldn't date a guy and I'm not much for kissing guys, but I just get turned on by sucking cock, especially if a lady is watching

US too! All I'm interested in is the cock , not even the body attached to it, would love to share this with her.

[Lascivious L&L 866]

I thought the Epstein inventory lacked some key questions. Particularly about kissing and love feelings. There are more than a few males who are not attracted to kissing a man, but sucking him is delightful. There are many who do not feel any sort of love attraction toward the same sex, but do feel a sexual attraction. The inventory did not deal with this.

 

Labels are handles...they open the door toward knowledge, but aren't knowledge themselves. Calling someone straight or bi only opens the door to discussion of what that means for the person, the full extent of their sexuality. I'm bi, sure, but what does that mean? I've sucked cock and been sucked, but never had anal sex with a man. I've never been in a mate relationship with a man. Does that mean I couldn't??? I've kissed men, but have preferred to kiss women. Yet a rare man's kisses have stimulated me.

 

I tested a mean of 5.5 and a range of 11. The limited number of questions limits the fineness in those numerical gradations.

[scubaguy 15]

There is an improvement in the Kinsey scale that asks several questions to get to your position on the scale. The man that did the research and developed this died a couple of years ago in California. At the moment I can't think of his name; he has written a couple of books. He did a book signing at the Bi booth at the Phoenix Pride the year before he died.

 

I am one of those near the middle but slightly on the prefer women side.

[DiscreetDesires 32]

Mrs. Diggs profile stats bi because she clearly has no issue with going down on another woman or having another woman satisfy her. We like 'bi-comfortable' or 'bi-selective' because she really has to have the attraction first but when the attraction is there then watch out because she will go after a woman with the same enthusiasm as any male.

 

Do you consider yourself straight-selective?

 

This is one part of those "varying levels" that I just do not agree with.

I am fully bisexual, meaning that I enjoy sexual encounters and relationships with both men and women, but there still needs to be an attraction there with either gender.

I would never be sexual with someone that I am not attracted to.

That is why I think it's funny when people say they are 'bi-selective".

To me, it just doesn't make any sense.

 

To me (and I may get some flack on this, but it is just my opinion and is really only worth the credit that I give it), there is Straight, Bisexual and Gay.

Whether or not you enjoy certain activities or enjoy a relationship is really a moot point.

Not all straight women enjoy having sex, being gone down on, giving head, or even like being in a relationship.

Does it make them any less straight? Nope. It just means that they don't enjoy certain things.

 

I do agree though, that when it comes to the lifestyle, any information pertaining to things that you enjoy doing, or not doing, should definitely be discussed with any potential play partners.

[Dark Secrets 15]

13 Types of Bisexuals

 

The Kinsey scale of zero to six was developed by sex researchers to describe sexual orientation as a continuum. Heterosexual people are at zero on the scale, gay and lesbian people are at six, at the other end of the scale and everyone in between, from one to five, is bisexual. According to Kinsey, people who fall at one or two on the scale have primarily heterosexual sexual and affectional relationships and desires, but have some attraction and experiences with same-sex partners as well.

 

People at three on the scale are approximately equally attracted to both men and women. People at four and five on the Kinsey Scale choose primarily same-sex partners, but are not completely gay or lesbian and have some heterosexual tendencies and relationships as well.

 

Who is bisexual? As you can see, there is no simple definition of bisexuality, and bisexual people are a very diverse group. Some bisexual people are committed to monogamous, long-term relationships, others have more than one partner concurrently in a variety of arrangements. There are several theories about different models of bisexual behavior. J.R. Little identifies at least 13 types of bisexuality, as defined by sexual desires and experiences. They are:

 

1. Alternating bisexuals: May have a relationship with a man. When that relationship ends, may choose a female partner for a subsequent relationship and may go back to a male partner next.

 

2. Recreational bisexuals: Primarily heterosexual but engage in gay or lesbian sex only when under the influence of drugs and/or alcohol.

 

3. Motivational bisexuals: Straight women who have sex with other women only because a male partner insists on it to titillate him.

 

4. Circumstantial bisexuals: Primarily heterosexual but will choose same-sex partners only in situations where they do not have access to other sex partners such as in jail, in the military or in a gender-segregated school.

 

5. Concurrent relationship bisexuals: Have primary relationships with one gender only but have other casual or secondary relationships with people of another gender at the same time.

 

6. Conditional bisexuals: Either straight or gay/lesbian, but will switch to a relationship with another gender for financial or career gain or for a specific purpose. They include young, straight males who become gay prostitutes or lesbians who get married to men to gain acceptance from family members or to have children.

 

7. Emotional bisexuals: Have intimate emotional relationships with men and women but only have sexual relationships with one gender.

 

8. Integrated bisexuals: Have more than one primary relationship at the same time, one with a man and one with a woman.

 

9. Exploratory bisexuals: Either straight or gay/lesbian, but have sex with another gender just to satisfy curiosity or see what it's like.

 

10. Hedonistic bisexuals: Primarily heterosexual but engage in gay or lesbian sex only when under the influence of drugs and/or alcohol.

 

11. Isolated bisexuals: 100% straight or gay/lesbian now but have previously had sexual experiences with another gender.

 

12. Latent bisexuals: Completely straight or gay/lesbian in behavior. Have a strong desire for sex with the other gender but have never acted on it. Motivational bisexuals: Straight women who have sex with other women only because a male partner insists on it to titillate him.

 

13. Transitional bisexuals: Temporarily identify as bisexual while moving from being straight to being gay or lesbian or going from being gay or lesbian to being heterosexual. Many of these people might not call themselves bisexual but because they are attracted to and have relationships with men and women, they are bisexual.

[xxxboxy 139]

Recreational and Hedonistic are virtually identical and both caveated to require being under the influence of drugs or alcohol?? Pretty worthless IMO.

[two4youinswva 3,068]

xxxboxy said:

Recreational and Hedonistic are virtually identical and both caveated to require being under the influence of drugs or alcohol?? Pretty worthless IMO.

 

I think that was just a case of bad copypasta. I used some Google-Fu on J.R. Little, since it didn't ring a bell, and this appears to be from his/her unpublished thesis from around 1989. Here's the list with an obvious difference between the Recreational and Hedonistic descriptors.

 

WHAT IS BISEXUALITY? By Kathy Labriola

 

I'm guessing from a layman's point of view that these definitions didn't catch on.

[Lascivious L&L 866]

It's the same old of trying to have neat categories for people and their sexuality. No matter how many categories you invent, humans have a spectrum of reasons and desires in their sexualities.

 

These categories here are just broad definitions of some of the reasons and desires some bisexuals may have, but there is no benefit in making them categories. We bisexuals all have differing levels of desire and differing reasons for our flavor of desire.

 

Even the Kinsey spectrum scale, while more reasonable, has arbitrary numbers. Why not 1-10 or 1-20 or 1-100? What's important is to see sexuality as a spectrum. Exactly what number you consider yourself is not very important.

[Guest rdy46227]

It's probably too late to update the original post (unless a moderator does it) so I'm pasting the information from the reference.

 

 

Quote

Hedonistic bisexuals:

 

primarily straight or gay/lesbian but will sometimes have sex with another gender primarily for fun or purely sexual satisfaction.

 

 

Recreational bisexuals:

 

primarily heterosexual but engage in gay or lesbian sex only when under the influence of drugs and/or alcohol.

 

 

The labels seem ambiguous/interchangeable. I qualify as Hedonistic, but would have chosen Recreational before reading the definitions and learning the label are backwards to my intuition -- Recreational is fun, drugs are hedonistic.

[peanut1972 15]

Dark Secrets said:

13 Types of Bisexuals

 

10. Hedonistic bisexuals: Primarily heterosexual but engage in gay or lesbian sex only when under the influence of drugs and/or alcohol.

 

We use to call #10 six pack bis. I've seen this happen to both gay and straight people. Personally I'm a mix of one and five.

[Chicup 41]

Well despite a lot of flaws in Kinsey's research, so what?

 

Why someone has sex with their own gender is up to them, THAT they have sex with their own gender is what is important in the context of swinging.

[Partyperks847 123]

Well despite a lot of flaws in Kinsey's research, so what?

 

Why someone has sex with their own gender is up to them, THAT they have sex with their own gender is whats important in the context of swinging.

 

Is a Str8 male who has sex with a man after 15 years of incarceration "Bi sexual" or Circumstantially Bisexual?

 

How likely is it he would have ever has sex, or desired to have sex with a male had these not been his circumstances?

 

"Why" always matters IMHO.

[sexykittennjean 49]

Well honestly, I have been in two threesomes and it was a lot of fun. Like a lot of women, I love men too but if I am going to have fun with women involved, I would expect her to reciprocate fully the same as I would her.

[D&D 362]

I could have used this as a reference in another thread....this is a keeper

 

One could easily take the term "bisexual" where ever it is found on this list and replace it with "homosexual" or "heterosexual". Every single member of this list has a counterpart in hetero or homosexuality. Apart from helping people to see that human sexuality is complicated and nuanced this list doesn't really point out any difference between homo or hetero sexuality other than the fact that bisexuals have sex with members of the same gender, while the other two have sex with the opposite gender.