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One problem of "being in the closet"
I think I've mentioned that all of our families do not know about our quad. Tech's family (immediate) does and it is a very nice change for us. There are suspicions in both my (Vol) famuly and Gator's family. Just not a good opportunity to confirm them I guess. Kitten's family, however, is not in the know and more than likely won't be. Which causes the problem we have. Gator is a bit lost.
See, Kitten's mother passed away according to the medical examiner about noon this past wednesday. She was not found until yesterday. Tech and Kitten left early this morning to make arragements and such. Gator has a few days off right now and could have gone. But how do you explain him? This is definitely not the time to do so if she was going to. He is a nurterer by nature. He wants/needs to be there for her. Needs to hug her, hold her and try to comfort her. That is one of his strengths.
We'll be leaving tomorrow after I get off work to pick up two of their children and head towards them. The good news for Gator is that we will all be staying at the house of Tech's mother. She knows about us and he'll be able to walk in and immediately hold her.
I've had a conversation or two with both my men about situations where we may have some problems. It's a fear for each of us that, if something were to happen to one of us, that we wouldn't be allowed access to the injured one. To clarify that, say Vol got hurt in an auto accident and Tech was the first one to make it to the hospital. They more than likely wouldn't allow him access to me because he isn't my legal husband (I'm not supposed to have two of those:lol:). Now, if I were able to talk, of course I'd tell them I wanted to see him. But what if I weren't able to do that? Should we each carry around a notorized letter stating we thing of each other as spouses? I'd do it if I thought it would work. But we really are a bit out of luck on this. I'd take advice from anyone in the know.
It hurts not being able to always be there for the other. Whether for a legal reason or something else. I hurt for Gator right now because he hurts.
Vol
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