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Adventures in .....

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JustAskJulie

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We've been wanting to check out the Xchanges group in Knoxville for quite a while, but it seems like every time we've tried to something has happened that's kept us from going.

 

This week we saw that they had an event coming up and again (as in prior times) the signup list on SLS looked awesome. Around 100 couples signed up with a large majority actually in our age range and attractive (to boot). We aren't closed to older couples but we really would like to meet some couples in our age range.

 

When we signed up they let us know that this was not their usual "Social" but was being held at a vanilla club that they were taking over till 11pm, at which time it would combine with the regular club, etc. No big deal. We like to dance so the idea that it was at a dance club just made it more appealing. So we made the plans. The hotel they had reccomended, unfortunately, was totally booked. So I got on Travelocity and plugged in the venue address and asked for nearest hotels. It gave us one that it said was a mile away that looked good, so we booked it. All was good and we were on on our way to Knoxville Saturday morning.

 

It's about a 3-3.5 hour drive from here to Knoxville (plus an hour time change going from Central to Eastern - which always screws us up when we go that way). Luckily, we planned for it and we got out of the house by a little after 11. We were making good time so we stopped in Cleveland at this awesome little Itallian hole in the wall (Mama's Italian if you are in the area - super cheap homemade italian food). Had a late lunch and we were back on our way.

 

For some reason we got to thinking that it might be a good idea to drive by the venue before going to the hotel, and it turned out to be a very good idea. We plugged the venue address into the GPS and suddenly our trip became 20 miles longer...???!!!! Something's not right. So we backed that out and thought we'll go by the hotel first and then go to the venue. So we got to the hotel and then plugged in the venue address... 15 miles away!!!!! Next stop Starbucks and Internet Access ASAP!

 

We drove on over to where the venue was thinking maybe we'd see a hotel nearby. NO such luck, we couldn't even find the venue! Luckily, the GPS I got Pet for Christmas is way better than the one in my car and it actually found us a Starbucks within a mile of where we were so we went there and got online. Found the venue website and it gave a list of nearby hotels (thankfully). So I called and luckily the first one had a room. It was a mile from the venue. Cool. Then back to the venue website to see if we could figure out where this place was. I got a good idea so we went driving again and did finally find it... and promptly decided that we'd be cabbing it that night.

 

We found our way to the new hotel we'd just booked and discovered they were evidently hosting an elementary school scholastic bowl!!! YIPPEE!! Thankfully, they put us on one of the upper floors and the kids on the lower ones (the only downside was that meant waiting even longer for the elevators that the kids were using as toys). We did learn a trick, though! Pet had heard somewhere that if you hold down the floor button (and keep it held down) once the elevator starts it will go directly to that floor - non stop. We tried it twice and it worked both times. Not really something you can do when other people need to stop at different floors.

 

So we finally get settled in, have some sex and get ready to go out. They had said to arrive between 7:45 and 10:45, and being the early birds that we are, we arrived at 7:30. The door was locked and cabbie really didn't want to just leave us there (can't say I blame him). Luckily, the hosts were there and saw us and invited us on in. The hosts for this party are just some of the most awesome people I think I've dealt with at any club. Very friendly and gracious. Since we were so early we got to talk to them a bit. We waited probably 40 minutes or so before much of anyone else showed up. Then people started coming in and it wasn't long before we were chatting away with one couple after another that we'd emailed the week prior. I think out of the 100 or so couples listed, we only emailed like 5 couples but we actually managed to identify and meet all of them, which was a plus in itself.

 

There were some very hot couples at this party and the only downside was the location was so HUGE for the number of couples that were there, that everyone ended up spreading out. I think we got our exercise trying to meet and talk to as many people as we could. We had one couple that kept popping up every time we turned around, and eventually we gave in and tried to enjoy their company. It was a little awkward as it was obvious the attentions were more one-sided, and that they seemed more into me than into us as a couple (I know that annoyed both of us). By the end of the night we were almost running away from them, as we'd gone to the other (vanilla) side of the club and turned around to leave and there they were, so we turned back around and headed the other direction.

 

Overall, this is one of the nicest groups we've been to. Pretty much everyone that we tried to talk to was friendly to us and talked to us, without making us feel like we were intruding, with one exception. There was an area in the back where there was a large fan and several couples had gathered around it. We wondered back there and I made the comment "you guys look like the cool kids so we thought we'd come say hi" (get it "cool" fan...) Evidently, they didn't get my joke or they were just snobs, I'm not sure which. One of them replied back with "we're definitely NOT the cool kids" and I smiled and laughingly said "well it must just be the fan then". "yeah must be" as they turned back around to their group. Um ok, so we just walked away and found more friendly folks - of which there were plenty.

 

We had a good time overall, but I can't say we'd make the drive/expense for that venue again. We definitely do want to go and check the group out again at one of their regular socials (which, of course, they are starting back in 2 weeks).

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Wow Julie, that's a long way to drive and a lot of trouble to go to a club. Glad you got to meet all five couples. I hope that when you get to check out their regular venue, you'll write another blog entry and tell us about it.

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Luckily, we met a lot more than just those 5 couples, I'd say we were able to meet at least half of the couples who were there (the other half being in that group that kind of shunned us, or couples who came in and put themselves in a booth or sat at the bar with their back to everyone to the point that their body language expressed a lack of desire to meet anyone.

 

We discussed it afterwards and while we wouldn't do it again for that venue, we didn't feel like it was a waste by any means. We're kinda on the fence as to whether it was really worth the (drive) time and money spent (being a vanilla bar the cover was low, but we spent a good bit on drinks = total was about twice what we'd spend for a normal social or even on-premise, thanks to drinks). Makes us appreciate BYOB all the more.

 

It was only about an hour further than Chattanooga and the one time we tried to hit a social there the only good that came out of it was dinner with some board friends and meeting a local couple (to us) that showed up. I think we actually stayed at that social for about 15 minutes (by far the shortest stay for any social we've ever actually spent the money to get into), because the room was so overly crowded you literally had no place to stand and if you sat you couldn't get back up without walking across the tables.

 

The biggest waste of money for a swinging event would have to be the time we went to Birmingham, booked a room before going, checked into said room. Got dressed then went to the social, stood in line to get in. Looked around at those in line (who were giving us a really weird vibe, in general) with us and excused ourselves for something we "forgot in the car", where we sat for the next 30 minutes watching a total of maybe 12 couples walk in (not one of which did we find remotely attractive) before leaving and going back to our hotel, changing clothes, checking out of said hotel and heading home.

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Julie

I have to say, you and your experiences are great tools with wich to learn from. Mrs. CXXC and I have only been to one club in our area (2.5 hour drive) and have been lucky enough to have had a great time with each visit.

I take from your posts that each club is different in the same way each couple is different.

Perhaps, we should have a "Club Rating" system on this site. If enough people post a review of each club along with the likes and dislikes, we could change bad clubs to good and make good clubs better.

THANK YOU again for all the "research" you do!

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I know that you and your husband both have the good sense and sufficiently solid social grace to never, ever. But haven't you once, at least, wanted to somehow make it evident to the "cool kids" that they had just snubbed the moderator of the world's largest swingers' Web site?

 

Ten years ago, a fellow member of an engineering association of which I am a member visits me before a meeting and waves this Xerox page before my face. He tells me that this company is about to make an initial public offering and I ought to buy in. I look at the image on the page. It appear to be a man standing on a pogo stick having two wheels. I tell him that if it is not the silliest idea ever, it's close to it. Well, today this guy has quite his job and is living off of the money he made by selling his shares in Segway, Inc. Needless to say, I regret snubbing him.

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CXXC - we do have a club rating system on this site. Just look under the "Club Listings" on the top menu. YOu can submit a review of any club you've visited. And yes, every club is different... even within the same location (we have 2 or 3 that meet in the same location locally and they each have their own personality).

 

SW_PA - I typically don't even tell the hosts who I am when I go to a club. People are people and I don't take issue with it. I'm just another person to them and when it comes to meeting people at socials and clubs that's just what I want to be. I don't want people wanting to be with me or thinking I'm the cool kid because I run a site. Hell, I've had people give me the cold shoulder before after finding out that I run "a site"... they also run "a site"... a localized site that I could have done a lot to help them promote.. but evidently they weren't interested. Oh well.

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Julie

One of these days, I am going to look at all the features on your site before I open my mouth! SIGH!

Thank you for pointing that out!

You and your site are cherrished!

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