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  1. Back To Top | #76

    Default Re: How often should you swing? pleasing different appetites..

    Quote Originally Posted by neoparadigm
    We did have the discussion about how often we would swing. She agreed to only 9 times a year. I think every other weekend would be a better compromise..
    A domineering guy who holds his woman to a minimum quota schedule for performing 'wifely duties' is pretty creepy. A guy with the same schedule for when she has to fuck strangers who she's not into so that he can get laid is beyond creepy. That's total over-the-top creepy. That's a pimp.

    If you were to just come right out and represent yourself as a lifestyle D/s couple then people might accept you more because then at least you're being honest about it. "She fucks whoever I tell her to, whenver I tell her to, and we both get off on the dominance and control." See that could be hot, IF she were actually into it. My wife and I have done it that way, people can dig it if you're honest about it.

    But you keep saying that she's not into it so just give it up. If she's not into it then you're just trying to trade her like wampum for more pussy.
    i love everybody. you're next.

  2. Back To Top | #77
    Awaiting Email Confirmation CandPinSA's Avatar
    Status
    Couple w/Str8 WM & Str8 HF

    Default Re: How often should you swing? pleasing different appetites..

    Quote Originally Posted by neoparadigm
    that was by far the best and most intellegent post I have read.. and thank you for that..

    .............The rest of these posters just seem to be here out of boredom or for entertainment purposes only..
    I've figured it out from this first statement in this post of yours. You're one of those early internet users, who spent all their time on usenet news groups, who thinks you know more than everyone else, but in reality know very little, and must continue to attempt to convince everyone else with whom you come in contact, that you are some sort of genius, prodigal, miracle creation, whithout whom the world would suffer greatly. The most unfortunate thing I see here, is that you spend all your time trying to convince everyone else that you are right, they are wrong, and they are totally close minded to everything outside their little world of thoughts and beliefs. All the while, you are only succeeding in demonstrating that you have absolutely no ability, whatsoever, to see, hear, accept anything someone else is telling you that's outside your own little world of thoughts and beliefs. You are exactly what you seem to so completely detest about the other people posting on this site. I believe we have come to the true root of the problem. You suffer from paranoia, narcissism, and egomania. Possibly some schizophrenia mixed in as well, but certainly the first 3. Your inability to understand the emotions these create within you, and therefore your inability to cope with them, results in a classicly failing coping strategy of transferring those things you are afraid of in yourself to all those with whom you come in contact that don't fit into your little world of thoughts and beliefs. This subconsious strategy usually does, as in your case, fail to alleviate your symptoms, which only more greatly enforces your fears of failure, thereby causing you to only strengthen your self-defense mechanisms, reinforcing your own vision that you must be correct and everyone else around you is insane, inept, or misguided. The worse thing about this for you is that it is all self reinforcing which causes a terrible spiralling of these feelings, until at some point you will auger into the ground and self destruct.

    Seek counseling and therapy.

    Hope this has helped,
    Mr. C

  3. Back To Top | #78
    Chimpin' Ain't Easy Spoomonkey's Avatar
    Status
    Married Monkeys - will you be our vine?
    SLS Handle
    Spoomonkey

    Default Re: How often should you swing? pleasing different appetites..

    Quote Originally Posted by TeamSoBe
    If she's not into it then you're just trying to trade her like wampum for more pussy.
    Wampum?

    Spoomonkey
    "Eros will have naked bodies; Friendship naked personalities." - C. S. Lewis

  4. Back To Top | #79

    Default Re: How often should you swing? pleasing different appetites..

    Quote Originally Posted by neoparadigm
    I think a lot of you are just full of shit here.. lets say we find you on SSL or whatever, we meet at a club, we are a hot couple and ready to play, my girl is gorgeous, and we all get along fine, laugh, are sexy and just as the play is about to begin ...
    You would have to both be great actors and great liars to get to this point with us. Not saying it couldn’t happen, but we are typically good judges of compatibility and character.


    Quote Originally Posted by neoparadigm
    I announce my true identity the dreaded "Neoparadigm"... would you all quicky put on your clothes and run for the door as fast as you can?
    If we realized the couple we were with had been lying to us? Yes. If we realized that they were gloating about lying to us? Hell yes. It is easy to project your standards onto others, and that is why you are wrong in your assumption.
    We are slutier than many of the people on this board but even we have found that it is not just about “hotness”. If we get the vibe that either partner is not totally into hooking up with us, or not being honest about what they want, or lied to us about their situation, we don’t want to be with them. It doesn’t matter how hot, sexy, fun, or charming they are. Shutting down couples like that isn’t a hypothetical for us, it has happened.

    Have we been duped before? Maybe. Not that we know of though.




    Concerning the rest of your post (i'll skip the "full of shit" because it's already been addressed):
    I think those of us who have tried to give you something constructive are just falling into the trap of thinking we can really help you. It's pretty obvious that we cannot. It just seems so easy though. What should you do?
    1- Leave your GF
    2- Stay with her and look out for the best interest of each other (ie. stop trying to manipulate her)
    3- Stay with her and force/coerce her into things she is opposed to, knowing that it will cause her pain and resentment.

    No other questions matter until you answer that one. Do you really need a forum like this to guide you to one of those options?
    ------------------------------------
    "Live your life like your ass is on fire"
    -Unknown

  5. Back To Top | #80

    Default Re: How often should you swing? pleasing different appetites..

    Quote Originally Posted by Spoomonkey
    Wampum?
    Wampum
    i love everybody. you're next.

  6. Back To Top | #81
    Awaiting Email Confirmation CandPinSA's Avatar
    Status
    Couple w/Str8 WM & Str8 HF

    Default Re: How often should you swing? pleasing different appetites..

    Quote Originally Posted by neoparadigm
    U agree I seem to be missing the point.. let me back track..
    I met this woman on AFF and the very first night we full swap with a couple, have a great time, she fucks like a porn star, and I have clearly "found" what I am looking for.. I think, now this is the girl I am going to marry! She is the one who liked my profile on


    (all of the other BS crap snipped for lack of interest... and for brevity)

    I think a lot of you are just full of shit here.. lets say we find you on SSL or whatever, we meet at a club, we are a hot couple and ready to play, my girl is gorgeous, and we all get along fine, laugh, are sexy and just as the play is about to begin ... I announce my true identity the dreaded "Neoparadigm"... would you all quicky put on your clothes and run for the door as fast as you can? I bet not.. you'd all probably say.. hey.. we really enjoyed our conversations with you online, glad we helped you out... looks like things are working out for you two.. welcome to the lifestyle..!

    This entire post only reasserts all of my previous post.

    Personally, sir, this only proves you are a clueless twit. You have no understanding, beyond what only you think you have, of other people around you whatsoever. If you announced to me and Mrs. P that you were neoparadigm from SB, I would tell you, "dude, F off .... If I had know that's who you were, your well versed conversation in person in no way removes your impression left by your true nature expressed on SB. It only shows what a dishonest person you are, and how little integrity you posess. And Mrs. P and I have far more respect for ourselves that to be associated with the likes of you." That is actually what would happen.

    Mr. C

  7. Back To Top | #82

    Default Re: How often should you swing? pleasing different appetites..

    Quote Originally Posted by CandPinSA
    I've figured it out from this first statement in this post of yours...The worse thing about this for you is that it is all self reinforcing which causes a terrible spiralling of these feelings, until at some point you will auger into the ground and self destruct...Seek counseling and therapy.
    Well said Mr. C. I posted our response before seeing yours.

    It's a little sad that your advice (and all the other advice given) is falling on def ears.

    T
    ------------------------------------
    "Live your life like your ass is on fire"
    -Unknown

  8. Back To Top | #83
    Chimpin' Ain't Easy Spoomonkey's Avatar
    Status
    Married Monkeys - will you be our vine?
    SLS Handle
    Spoomonkey

    Default Re: How often should you swing? pleasing different appetites..

    Quote Originally Posted by TeamSoBe
    Cool!

    I need to get me some wampum...

    Spoomonkey (fascinated by beads)
    "Eros will have naked bodies; Friendship naked personalities." - C. S. Lewis

  9. Back To Top | #84

    Default Re: How often should you swing? pleasing different appetites..

    Quote Originally Posted by Spoomonkey
    Cool!

    I need to get me some wampum...

    Spoomonkey (fascinated by beads)
    Well I'm wearing some beads right now actually Spoo! What will you give me for 'em.??
    "Well! Evil to some is always good to others." - Jane Austen

  10. Back To Top | #85

    Default Re: How often should you swing? pleasing different appetites..

    Quote Originally Posted by Spoomonkey
    I need to get me some wampum...
    ...or just a whore that you can trade out every other weekend. That would be pretty cool too I guess.

    Neo, why don't you just pay her to fuck those guys? Then at least there would be something in it for her. Or use Craig's List to find 'generous' couples who will make it worth her time so that you're not paying her with your own money. These things happen all the time in carefree vacation towns like yours and mine, it seems like you would have already thought of this. If you're really as kinky as you say you are then the real problem for her is that there's nothing in it for her.
    i love everybody. you're next.

  11. Back To Top | #86
    Chimpin' Ain't Easy Spoomonkey's Avatar
    Status
    Married Monkeys - will you be our vine?
    SLS Handle
    Spoomonkey

    Default Re: How often should you swing? pleasing different appetites..

    Quote Originally Posted by EvilMJ
    Well I'm wearing some beads right now actually Spoo! What will you give me for 'em.??
    How about Manhattan Island?

    And a little monkey love

    Spoomonkey
    "Eros will have naked bodies; Friendship naked personalities." - C. S. Lewis

  12. Back To Top | #87
    Chimpin' Ain't Easy Spoomonkey's Avatar
    Status
    Married Monkeys - will you be our vine?
    SLS Handle
    Spoomonkey

    Default Re: How often should you swing? pleasing different appetites..

    Quote Originally Posted by TeamSoBe
    ...or just a whore that you can trade out every other weekend. That would be pretty cool too I guess.
    Yes - there is always that

    Spoomonkey
    "Eros will have naked bodies; Friendship naked personalities." - C. S. Lewis

  13. Back To Top | #88

    Default Re: How often should you swing? pleasing different appetites..

    Quote Originally Posted by Spoomonkey
    How about Manhattan Island?

    And a little monkey love

    Spoomonkey
    Deal. Now I just have to rename the place.

    Evil Monkey Island?
    "Well! Evil to some is always good to others." - Jane Austen

  14. Back To Top | #89

    Default Re: How often should you swing? pleasing different appetites..

    It is truly tempting to dupe some of you here in the months to come..
    it would be so easy to do.. our profile name is something different on the other sites..
    We are a very hot looking couple and it would be fun to set a trap and then as we all
    leave the party after playing, we exchange e mails and you get a message from the dreaded neoparadigm.. ! To be honest I am tempted to do it ..

    How many of these lifestylers would really be there for you like your family or vanilla friends?
    How many would attend your funeral? For me..swinging is about sex... not swingers..
    I don't need anymore friends.. can hardly give enough time and love to the ones I have..
    To trade them all in for a bunch of "Lifestyle" compatible swinger friends is the most ridiculous concept I have ever heard on these boards..and some of you are doing that..

    So many of you here talk about such respect, integrity and depth of character in the lifestyle,
    and all I think is what hypocritical BS.. Some of the flakiest, shallow people I have ever met have been quote "swingers" in the lifestyle.. I have found the porn industry to have higher standards integrity.

    I would completely accept your shallow narrow mindedness at the swing club, fuck your brains out and move on to the next one. There is only one couple here I would invite to my backyard BBQ. People go to these clubs in the hopes of getting laid by other hot couples.. we showed up at a new club in Vegas for the first time, and everyone was on us like fly paper. Six couples hit on us inviting us to play without even knowing our daytime professions. We picked two of them, fucked and had a great time.. So all this BS about friends and BBQs is really just trying to sugar coat the whole thing.. would you really be such great friends if swinging was not involved? Unlikely..

  15. Back To Top | #90

    Default Re: How often should you swing? pleasing different appetites..

    Quote Originally Posted by EvilMJ
    Deal. Now I just have to rename the place.

    Evil Monkey Island?
    Well, since it's a transaction, how about Evil Monkey Business Island?

    Thrax
    You get what you play for.

  16. Back To Top | #91

    Default Re: How often should you swing? pleasing different appetites..

    Quote Originally Posted by Thrax
    Well, since it's a transaction, how about Evil Monkey Business Island?

    Thrax
    Shoot, I just spit water all over my keyboard.
    "Well! Evil to some is always good to others." - Jane Austen

  17. Back To Top | #92

    Default Re: How often should you swing? pleasing different appetites..

    Quote Originally Posted by neoparadigm
    Some of the flakiest, shallow people I have ever met have been quote "swingers" in the lifestyle.. I have found the porn industry to have higher standards integrity.
    Okay wait wait wait, that's another one of those comments that doesn't even make sense. The Neo online persona would not get along with porn industry people any more than he gets along with swingers. You said that assuming that none of us have ever been on a porn set. Think real hard about that one, Sherlock, there's a lot of overlap between those two crowds.

    I know pornographers. I hang with pornographers. I have been a pornographer. You, sir, are no pornographer. You would clash with the people who you would meet at a porn convention or nightlife event or set in exactly the same way that you're clashing with people here. Your flavor of misogyny and disrespect for women is NOT tolerated in the female-dominated porn industry and if you had ever met a single real porn producer or girl talent then you would know that.
    i love everybody. you're next.

  18. Back To Top | #93
    Awaiting Email Confirmation CandPinSA's Avatar
    Status
    Couple w/Str8 WM & Str8 HF

    Default Re: How often should you swing? pleasing different appetites..

    Quote Originally Posted by neoparadigm
    (all the other mindless drivel snipped because it was just the ignorant rantings of a raving lunatic................ ;-)


    So all this BS about friends and BBQs is really just trying to sugar coat the whole thing.. would you really be such great friends if swinging was not involved? Unlikely..

    Neo,

    Who really cares? You obviously have no idea what happens to cause a 'friendship' to develop in the first place. 'Something' in common. It matters not what that 'something' is.... just that it is. If that 'something' happens to be swinging, then a friendship may develop around that. Just as two people who enjoy scuba diving, but have nothing else in common, may develop a friendship and share backyard BBQ's. I know this is particularly true for myself and some friends. We dive together often, but have little else, if anything, in common with each other. However every time there is a BBQ, we are all there together as friends. In fact, as often as not, the BBQ is a side event at a dive, as that is our primary reason for being friends. I also enjoy racing, both amateur driving and watching. I have many friends who are the same. We have little else in common, but often go have a few drinks together and hang out.... In the case of many here, who would be friends with other swingers solely becuase they are all swingers, makes their friendship no less valid than two whores who become friends solely because they both whores.... but who have little else in common. The cause of a friendship developing is neither important nor prescribed. It will develop where ever it develops, for whatever reasons it develops. Christians and Satanists would be hard pressed to become friends, but does that make two Christians false friends, solely because they are friends because they are both Christians... and the same question of two Satanists who are friends solely because they are both Satanists. Two farmers are friends because they are farmers, and to computer programmers are friends solely because they are both computer programmers.

    You desparately need more education, social training, and the enlightenment you seem to be so desparately seeking. The saddest thing here, Neoparadigm, is that everyone here IS offering you higher enlightenment, you are just too damn stubborn, blind, and close minded to receive it.

    Mr. C

  19. Back To Top | #94

    Default Re: How often should you swing? pleasing different appetites..

    It is truly tempting to dupe some of you here in the months to come..it would be so easy to do.. our profile name is something different on the other sites..We are a very hot looking couple and it would be fun to set a trap and then as we all leave the party after playing, we exchange e mails and you get a message from the dreaded neoparadigm.. ! To be honest I am tempted to do it ..
    Now doesn't that just say it all about this guy. Nice attitude...
    Never be bullied into silence. Never allow yourself to be made a victim. Accept no one's definition of your life; define yourself. "Harvey Fierstein"

  20. Back To Top | #95

    Default Re: How often should you swing? pleasing different appetites..

    I don't think we have any plans for Texas.. but if I ever find you hit our profile in Vegas on a trip out you are going to get a shocking surprise! and your own real awakening about how shallow you really are after neo had fucked your wife..

    swinging is about sex first... not friends..

  21. Back To Top | #96

    Default Re: How often should you swing? pleasing different appetites..

    so am i getting this right? you would trick people at a club fuck em and send them a letter saying who you really are? just to prove you could? im wondering would you spike our drinks? if we didnt want to play? would you go that far?man please draw a line somewhere.

  22. Back To Top | #97

    Default Re: How often should you swing? pleasing different appetites..

    so many of you have been so disrespectful to me here.. bashing and slamming my beliefs and position on swinging, never asking questions that might help me to find serious answers to questions I have very legitimatly posed here on the forum.. most of you come across as holier than thou, and up until today I have been nothing but repectful and just taking it..
    so guess what?

    someone here is going to take it in the ass... believe me..

  23. Back To Top | #98
    Awaiting Email Confirmation CandPinSA's Avatar
    Status
    Couple w/Str8 WM & Str8 HF

    Default Re: How often should you swing? pleasing different appetites..

    Quote Originally Posted by fun4Ds
    so am i getting this right? you would trick people at a club fuck em and send them a letter saying who you really are? just to prove you could? im wondering would you spike our drinks? if we didnt want to play? would you go that far? please draw a line somewhere.
    Interesting question.

    CandP

    P.S. Neo, Mrs. P says you should read our profiles on other boards (also under different names).... she doesn't want to fuck another guy, and she is totally straight so it wouldn't be your lady friend either, and she isn't into whores..... she wants to be the 3rd for me and nother man.... I'm bi. So it would be me you got to fuck not her.

  24. Back To Top | #99

    Default Re: How often should you swing? pleasing different appetites..

    sounds like you are safe then..
    but these other full swap couples or ones looking for bi females could be getting duped here in the months to come after"NEO"leaves the board and is forgotten about as the days fade by..

    I won't forget the ones here though..!

    If you move slowly like you should.. being of such high intergrity and all.. you will be safe..
    but anyone who asks to play right away without building a strong and solid friendship base will
    put themselves at high risk of a duping...! (just for fun though!) there is nothing wrong with a prankster is there? It would be you hitting the bait ... not me..

  25. Back To Top | #100

    Default Re: How often should you swing? pleasing different appetites..

    someone here is going to take it in the ass... believe me..
    Wow so way over the line...
    Never be bullied into silence. Never allow yourself to be made a victim. Accept no one's definition of your life; define yourself. "Harvey Fierstein"

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