Playing Hard to Get and Hurt Feelings

[ShellyM]

Originally Posted by prettylady

ALWAYS LISTEN TO THE WIFE!!!!

I mean we are always right.

Now you're talking girlie!

[Additude]

Don't do anything.

Next time you meet them at a party or whatever then you know what to do.

She wants to play "chase me" to hook up with you and to me that means she is interested in you. So, next time play a little cat and mouse with her.....physicologically she probably wants you even more now that you ignored her....

[riswingcpl]

Like everyone else, I think you owe no apology at all. You followed the golden rule...no means no...just as you should. Playing games like that has no place in the lifestyle, unless all are clued in to the game in advance.

Originally Posted by northindycpl

Dito!

As a side note; I had a playmate one time that I have no interest in playing with again. We are all friends and I see them at the club quite a bit. I would not tell him that I don't want to play with him again, but I do play a bit hard to get and he simply moves on. It may be a chicken-shit way of avoiding him, however it doesn't hurt his feelings or make me uncomfortable and we all remain great friends.

We had a situation somewhat simliar to this about 3 years ago. We had an mfm with a guy we met on SN. We got a room, then met him at a local pub. Long story short, he was pretty much a dud, and actually fell asleep on our bed! We woke him up and sent him on his way, with a polite "thanks...see you later".

We had given him my cell number in case he had to cancel or had problems finding us that night. He called about a month later, and I told him we were really not interested in an mfm right now, thanks anyway. In hindsight, I should have just told him we weren't interested in HIM, but trying to be polite, I didn't. That was a mistake, because he has called three more times...once while we were standing in the middle of G's daughter's dorm room, once while out to dinner with our kids, and a couple of weeks ago while we were sitting at my parent's dinner table.

Obviously, the conversation was short and vanilla at those times, but after the last call, I looked up his profile and told him in no uncertain terms to stop calling. I told him that giiving him the phone number was to faciliate the hookup that first night, and it didn't give him license to call whenever he felt like it. (the last call was THREE YEARS after the first hookup!) I also told him that we had been trying to be polite, but that after one "no thanks" and two unreturned phone calls...couldn't he take a hint? He never replied.

Lesson learned...be polite when possible, but be direct. Sometimes people need to be hit with a hammer before they get the message I guess!

M