Couple in our early 30s that's been dating less than a year. My gf is very sexual and very curious. We have great sex... both feel like our sex together is better than we've had with anyone else. We both like to experiment in the bedroom and as time goes on we are trying more things.
In the past she has played with other women because she was curious. I know she has a desire to go to a swingers club, find a couple and play with the woman while we have sex. This includes kissing her, touching her or if they want to eat each other out. I've never been in a relationship with someone in that situation so I'm not sure how I'd feel. I'm not sure if it necessarily really turns me on, but I dont really have a problem with it. Beyond that tho, I'm not really comfortable with much else. I dont want another man touching her or her touching another man. I'm not interested in touching the other woman either.
If we were just fucking and not in a relationship then I'd probably be ok with it. But being a relationship, it seems more difficult to think about her being intimate with another man.
Its not that I'm afraid she'll leave me, but how does someone have sex and not start forming an emotional bond with that person? That's human nature. At least that's how it feels to me.
Anyways, going to a swingers club at this point is mainly to make her happy. It isnt something that I'm pushing for or something that hugely turns me on. But part of me feels bad about it. I'd like to be like some others guys on here that want to see their wife or gf have sex with other guys while having sex with other women. But for whatever reason I'm just not comfortable with that idea yet. How does one get themselves to that point? Maybe if we were married for years and were extremely comfortable with each other, I wouldn't really have a problem with it. Sometimes I think we're still learning about each other and not at that point yet. I dont think she feels that way, but I do.
I want to make her happy so I'm fine going and having her play with a woman. When talking about it she wants it to be random - shes not interested in socializing or getting to know the couple ahead of time. I dont know what is normal protocol. Is finding a random couple at an event ok?
Also, how do I make sure my gf knows how I feel without sounding like I'm just super jealous or controlling? Maybe someday I'll be more comfortable but I'm just not there yet. How do we set our boundaries with each other but also set boundaries with whatever couple we meet? How specific do we need to be? What if someone gets carried away in the moment? I want my gf to explore but I dont want my boundaries to be crossed either.
Any advice for a newbie would be great...thanks
