Hello,
We're are new to the lifestyle. We've been married 13 years and been mostly monogamous (few soft swaps at parties,nothing big). We've been talking about stepping more into it and have decided to take a positive step forward by going to a local club. We've talked long and are agreed on our limits and rules. Our plan is to start out nice and slow (watching and being watched) with flexibility into soft play if connections happen and level of comfort fits. We're looking for advice for first timers. We've read a lot on both the do's and don'ts but would love additional advice for starting out. Mrs is the more reserved and nervous and will be setting the pace for things. We don't expect anyone to hang out with the slow couple (which we're fine with, we'd be happy to just have sex in public and enjoy the atmosphere together). But what good sage advice can you give for interacting with people? We're not against chatting and being social (would love it in fact). And there is a possibility that it could lead to something but nothing guaranteed. So how do you recognize if someone is just being social or trying to be persistent. We've read threads about predators that sometimes go after new couples and Mrs is afraid of being pressured into something that'll ruin it both for us. Also nervous about the "fine art of saying no". Is there a fool proof way without being mean or rude? If we turn someone down because we're not ready now but may be later, are we hurting any future playing? You know, mostly the same questions that are on a lot of these newbie posts.
Thanks
Allen