exercise couple

hhmmmnnn...my judgement is impaired by not knowing how you spoke with her...the evasive response suggests if something not deceptive at least something borderline. i definitely felt funny reading it. what she's not saying when you try to engage may be meaningful.

if everything you say is as represented, then betrayal, blame and denial are like sound reasons for intensive therapy and years of recovery or divorce. even with a willingness to reconcile and less severe consequences than your situation, it can be nearly impossible to build back the level of trust nevessary for a healthy marriage. i was in a similar situation (the dynamic not the specific behaviors) and underestimated the significance of the warning signs and found myself with a person radically different than the one i was with for many years. though some people do change overnight, it would not be too surprising if whatever the source for this situtaion might have already been there. often people carry around something unhealthy and perhaps dormant in them that seemingly comes out of nowhere to sabotage a healthy, open and loving relation. i am so very sorry; this must be incredibly painful. take care of yourself and do not beat yourself up over coulda shoulda woulda. though some people bounce back from an awful situation quickly and seemingly without real damage, it may take everything you have just to move toward a place where your own individual psychological and emotional health is stable.

it requires a particular amount of comfort to let someone's face get right up in yours. it is a different type of vulnerability and exposure than genital contact. heck, look at the animal kingdom, where face-to face contact can be much more threatening than face-to-genital or genital-genital contact. we have so much sensory perception thru our faces--think of how many senses are right there! heck, just think about the intensity of eye contact alone! i am not at all surprised there is such a variety of strong opinions on kissing in the swinger world.