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In the lifestyle is the trust the most important, for a good relationship and a harmony in sexual life. To break the rules is very bad. No protection it means a big risk for the partner.

My advice would be to stop playing until you are on the same page. This is no OK. Relationships are based on trust. She is violating that.

I'm stunned you are accepting this. I'm stunned you are asking strangers on a forum whether you should "say something about the risk of her getting pregnant?" Stunned. Ignoring the obvious risk of getting an STD, which is a deal breaker for us, you are waiting for advice from a forum while she is risking getting pregnant. I don't know what state you live in but you could be on the hook paying to raise a child from some swinger fling! As others have said, I'd pull the plug on swinging immediately. I'm willing to bet she won't agree. When she pushes back on you stopping swinging, I'd schedule some consultations with divorce attorneys and get your ducks in a row.

Yes indeed. Jealousy went from being my greatest fear to my best friend. I am still jealous, but am now addicted to it. I no longer fear it, but play with it. I am like a kid who is scared shitless on the roller coaster, but then immediately wants to go again.

You are definitely right on that. And I’ll definitely update as things go along.

Just curious if deception is part of your relationship or is it maybe the underlying problem?

We had originally talked about maybe her putting on her little maid outfit and being our waitress for the night or her just wearing a more revealing nighty to show her off a bit, then if we all where feeling it then maybe just a bit of touching her. Apparently things don’t always go as planned but it worked out. Not quite sure what the next time will consist of but il update as we go along.

It’s my fervent hope that this is an expression of fantasy and not one of fact. If it is factual, it is appalling. In every way.

I think this situation should be used in the Urban dictionary to define a "SHIT STORM" Good luck.

"Play with it" is such a powerful phrase because it encapsulates something that's so key to this: trust. Jealousy hurts because we believe the other person is disregarding us. Learning to put on a show, perform, and make it playful, turns it into pleasurable and scandalous stimulation. I remember that first time I strongly encouraged Mrs. E. to try sunbathing topless by the pool at a hotel in Europe. She knew what I was interested in playing with and went with it, albeit reluctantly, knowing there was a pack of college-aged guys caddy-corner ogling her. Lotioning up and pretending she had no idea they were staring, until she finally got self-conscious and put her top back on. It was only when I got up to get us drinks that I realized I had a massive hard-on, and we ducked back into our hotel and 69ed the afternoon away. You've crossed the first taboo boundary, intimate touch, with a light heart.

I suspect this is a deeper issue than either of you have admitted to each other and that yes, she might be risking it on purpose. This is something to untangle. Possibly in couple's counseling with a sex-positive therapist who understands the lifestyle.

Yes! Please do continue to update :) We're all rooting for you! And definitely go at the pace you both feel comfortable with! Jealousy is a strange thing. It's good you're recognizing it. Don't let it control you. Remember your wife is in love with you, stays with you, is married to you. No matter what she does with someone else, it's you she's staying with.

Welcome to the board Thank you for your insightful first post. I’m thrilled you understand what your wife enjoys, most men never understand. 🙄

if she can handle it - double vaginal feels amazing for everyone involved. If you are interested in some anal play, get her a strap on and let her peg both of you. Suck his cock while she is fucking him - it will drive them both wild.

OK, it seems you have a girlfriend and she's OK with your bi-curiosity. If that's the case and you've found a third that is bi, then just don't worry about it. Just let the action take you. If he and your girlfriend are about to have intercourse, help him enter her. That's a great way to start. Then, and depending on their position this can be difficult but, while they're having intercourse, help her by licking her clitoris and you'll find that you can also get to explore him at the same time. And, if all goes well, clean them both after they finish. After that, I don't think you'll have any apprehensions again.

Back to the original question for this thread. It sometimes amuses me how we can get side tracked. My wife's reaction surprised me a lot. I've probably told this somewhere here before but here's how she found out that I would entertain bi activities. I was writing a series of erotic stories for a website. I had created a married couple, characters that were very close to us, and this couple was involved in swinging with another couple. When we were working, I'd get up earlier than my wife and write a story. Then, when she got up she'd read it and we'd discuss in on our morning walk before getting ready for work. One morning the action just naturally had the two husbands playing with each other during the sex encounters of the four of them. After I wrote it, I thought of taking it out but it was just too much part of the story. When my wife admitted, on our walk, that she thought it was hot I was really relieved. After that I continued writing with the husbands playing as well. Oh, and, I admitted for the first time about a few bi experiences I'd had in my life.

So if a straight man’s dick has been in a woman’s ass that is ok?

I think that many bi men only have oral not anal sex. Is that a fallacy (phallusy)?