First full swap finally happened

[NC_Seniors 492]

One of my fears: not being able to perform, or performing too quick. Neither of these things happened. A million things were going through my head, so I didn't have a lot of time to glance over at my wife. I reached out and grabbed her hand and held it though ... We have had zero bad feelings after this.

Congratulations on your breakthrough! Our first time was the same as yours, i.e. it left us with no post-swap bad feelings either.

[cplnuswing 4,711]

Congrats on making your first full swap experience a great one! I say thst way because it is true, the lifestyle is what you make of it, and good things rarely if ever happen just out of sheer luck. You guys had a plan that you developed together, and were patient and gave all the pieces time to fall into place. They did and a great time was had by all!

[couplers 4,140]

... The only 'processing' thing we've done is my wife trying to figure out why seeing her on top of me has turned her on so much,..

Does your wife ever take the female-superior position with you? If not, that explains it.

[MadlyInLuv 94]

Firstly , your post was very well written , the ebb and flo of the post with the pause button pharagraph insert was creative and informative to those readers that haven't lost their full swap cherry yet. Kudos for sharing.

 

It's possiable your wife is having those feeling because she is sharing something she considers hers. That postion is more about the woman then the man. Sharing you with the other woman full swap sexually could be empowering to her. That might be worth a conversation between the two of you to explore the feeling.

 

Lastly good for you two in figuring it out at long last. Now that your sail is at full mast , take the time to enjoy the ride and try not to over think the journey to much. As you've already experienced nothing is really set in stone and it's a trial and error kinda thing , within reason of course.

 

Thank you! We have both realized that this is a very feast/famine activity. We've struck out months at a time, or got busy and didn't even pursue it for months at a time, etc. We also tend to prefer the term 'hobby' rather than 'lifestyle'. Not sure why. lol

 

Like everyone else, our main two priorities are guarding against 1. emotional issues (sadness, jealousy, or developing feelings). None of these have happened thus far. and 2. Disease. We don't fancy the idea of having to go get treated for something and have to explain ourselves. :p Those two issues have prompted us to move more slowly and step carefully more than anything else.

[bbarnsworth 2,536]

Fantastic!!!! Congratulations!!!!

 

The only 'processing' thing we've done is my wife trying to figure out why seeing her on top of me has turned her on so much, but it has.

 

This isn't unusual. I've seen others report the same sort of effect as well. I feel it in me as well. I get a serious sexual kick out of watching another man have sex with my wife. When I was young, I was a very jealous sort of person. Now, I just _love_ watching her have sex with another man. Go figure. I tried hard for a long time to figure out why I felt this way, and gave up. I can't explain it. All I know is I really enjoy it. Your wife may be of the same feeling.

 

We have a second date with them scheduled at the end of this week.

 

... Like everyone else, our main two priorities are guarding against 1. emotional issues (sadness, jealousy, or developing feelings)

 

A valid concern, and many couples have it. Swinging is about variety, but there's also another perspective. As you note, you've had a hard time finding a couple where everything clicks. If, after going through all this effort to find them, you were to turn away from them after a couple of play dates...you could be sad that you did. Feelings are a potential issue, but it doesn't have to be a show stopper. That's up to the two of you to figure out together. Over time, people that have sex together will almost certainly eventually develop emotions for each other. That could make it more complex, and something you don't want. It could also make it a lot better. However you work it out, do as you have; communicate well and keep on the same page.

 

Again, congratulations!!!