My wife and i recently had an MFM threesome with a friend of mine that lives in PA (we are in MD) so it didnt make things too wierd. There was about 6-8 months of discussion before it took place and a lot of scenarios were proposed and comfort levels were established. Now there did seem to be a great deal of unknowns as you sited (how would it be afterwards) but everything in our situation just worked out. The main thing that ran through my head was will we ever be able to have 1 on 1 again or would i need to call for back up.. there is an amazing amount of attention satisfaction that the female half gets during the whole expirence, you just have to make sure she knows where home is after its all said and done! You will know when the time is right just dont give her the on again off again head trip its not fair to her!. Good luck ITS AWESOME!