To Kiss or Not to Kiss

[DKent]

I was curious, not being involved in the Lifestyle other than in my fantasies at the moment...who amongst you like to kiss the total stranger you're banging crotches with, and who saves that most intimate of practices for the SO? It seems that it might be undesirable at times to kiss that person you just met, even though sex with them is fun. Comments?

[ohsobad]

Very interesting question... I was just wondering that myself.

[fun4Ds]

We kiss... It was the first of many rules to go.

[rpu3]

We both kiss. Never was a rule, just seems more awkward to me to not kiss, actually. YMMV, of course.

[Spoomonkey]

We had the rule of "no kissing" for about a minute... Of course, kissing wound up being the first thing we did in the lifestyle.

We love to kiss as a couple, and in playing with others, it just seemed the right thing to do. We've met couples that don't and have played with them. But it is probably not something we'd do again. We respect the rule - and understand the rule - but it is just too hard to remember it when you are with someone.

And it feels awkward.

Spoomonkey

[LikeMinds321]

Kissing a total stranger?

I'd rather start at the top...right on their lips.

For us, we couldn't imagine getting to the other body parts without kissing. If I couldn't kiss it would feel clumsy...like trying to walk in shoes that were three sizes too big.

Once we met a couple privately, spent a couple hours with them at dinner and decided to invite them back to our place to play. It was about an hours drive to our home. We sat around in the living room with our drinks, moving towards the sex, when they hit us with their "no kissing" rule. The night ended right there.

They hadn't mentioned their no-kissing rule in their profile and our profile specifically mentions that we're real big on kissing!

Turning down sex at that point may sound harsh on our part, but we just lost our appetite then and there. We think of it this way, we wouldn't have asked someone to meet us if they had a specific rule that didn't mesh with our own guidelines and we wouldn't try to change their play style for us. We felt we'd been mislead and that's what took the zip out of the meet.

Our feeling is, if you decide not to kiss, that's fine, just let people know well in advance.

LM

[NakedInSeattle]

We feel you can tell how good a lover someone is by how they kiss. It's been a pretty good indicator. Lousy kissers make lousy lovers.

[Alura]

We've always kissed but we've never had sex with strangers, either.

Alura

[socolais]

I can't imagine good sex without lots of sloppy kisses - anywhere and everywhere

[good times]

We are with the majority here, we kiss. In fact, our rule is, if a couple has a no kissing rule, we wouldn't play with them at all.

[swyngtyme]

When my wife and I were first discussing what our rules were going to be, I was nervous, and I suggested that I might want to make "no kissing" a rule. She said that immediately made her think of that movie, Pretty Woman, and made her feel like a whore. So, no such rule with us, quick decision.

[IrvTxCouple]

Everyone is a bit different, and we are no exception. I'm a kissing man, I love to kiss. It helps me guage the lady I'm kissing to see how much fun I'm going to have.

My lady however, doesn't care to kiss that much. She will kiss her partner but she isn't sloppy about it like I am. However, she has a crutch too... she's a screamer and can't if she's liplocked with someone

[MrsVan]

MrVan and I never understood this rule that some have in place but each to his or her own. I guess for us we both are very intimate people and feel that kissing is just the a way to get things started. facelick When MrVan and I are with another couple we do kiss and that usually happens alot first before we go further. Kissing for us is something that we do not feel we need to reserve for each other. We know that our kiss together is more passionate and more powerful between us than with the other couple that we play with because more feelings and emotions go into it. Whereas with couples it does not phase us and we would prefer to be with another couple that does kiss and does not have the "no kissing rule".

MrsVan

[Chip_n_Muffy]

Kissing is part of the overall experience. To not kiss would leave a part of it behind. I think I maybe understand the "no kissing" rule in that it reserves something intimate for a couple that is just theirs, but honestly, sex is pretty intimate too. I almost think I would rather soft swap with kissing than full swap without. Leaving something out at the start of the night would skew the rest of the evening.

Chip

BTW, if the preceding doesn't make sense to you, don't worry. I was merely thinking out loud ....

[graygo98]

Originally Posted by DKent

It seems that it might be undesirable at times to kiss that person you just met, even though sex with them is fun. Comments?

This seems so bizzarely backwards to me!