How often do you like to swing?

How is it to be a swinger couple for decades swinging almost every week? Are the excitement you have as a newbie as strong as very experienced or do you need to add more and more spice bringing endless new experiences to avoid swinging becoming a routine?

We had some really good sex meeting so far (except one) and we’re super excited to continue our adventure. But in the past month I’ve two persons that I know well that used to be in "big swinger" couples (very active swingers) and telling me I shall pace and not do like them. That I shall do it occasionally with my wife and leave time in between meetings. Is there a truth in what they say?

The answer could be “do what you want/feel” but I’d like people talking from experience as many of you here have. Let's put on the side the basics like we shall have good communication, honesty etc. If you had to do it all over would you do it less - more - the same - give an advice to a new swinging couple?

In my opinion, swinging can be like any drug or extreme sport, you need more frequent and increasingly higher doses of the high to keep the excitement level up. Limiting the frequency of swinging excursions is probably a good a good thing, otherwise life can become obsessed with new playmates, new and more intense activities, and therefore less focused on the couple's relationship and daily life. However, swinging is a very social activity and if couples ensure to focus on the fun they are having together, I suppose it could be a good thing. There's always potential for burn out with any activity, but there's also potential for addiction, don't you think?

In my world, swinging is balanced with other fun activities and a heavy dose of daily life of work, weekend chores, date nights with my S/O, exploring other interests, and the rest of "normal" life. When I was a newbie, it was easy to fall into the "every weekend" mindset, but I had to put the brakes on that with my ex for a number of reasons.

Everything in moderation

I'll answer how often do we swing, instead of how often we would like to since there are a whole lot of other things that stand between what we actually do and what we would like to do. Starting out and then for several years after that, we probably did something every three or four months on average. Go to a club or party, meet a couple for drinks, and so on. As we have developed some regular playmates to go along with those other things, then that frequency has picked up a bit, but it still means actually getting out every couple months. I don't think that we would ever want to get it to every weekend, but we would like to get out more often than we do, but for now, it is what it is.

In terms of how often do we do something swing related, then that's every day. There's this site of course, but even beyond that, it's not at all unusual for one or both of us to be checking in by text with some friends, etc. more often than not.

For us it's all about Timing!

You can meet all the couples in the world everyday for a year and the stars will only line up a few times...

We, like cplnuswing, do something swing related like checking the sites inc this one, texted or swapping details, pics (we call it 'cooking), even just talking about it most days. Actually getting out and doing it, we probably date once a month maybe twice, a club or party here and there. There was a period in the beginning where we were 'out' every weekend and some weekdays. When you do something too much you can end up chasing it instead of appreciating what you already have (These were the words of advice your 'big swinger' couples gave you). For us there's real life too like small children and busy schedules. We just went through a period of three months of doing nothing LS related and just playing with each other. We take those times too. And now our children are abroad with my parents for three weeks so the apartment looks like the set of a porn movie! And we are cooking and eating! It's what ever works for you both. It's a great hobby, it's also like Cocaine, the rush is huge and very addictive. I know swinger couples that eat and breath the LS it's 24/7 for them and it works for them. But not for me so much besides spontaneity is sexy.

We go out once every four to eight weeks. We live pretty hectic everyday lives and frankly we have other interests.

I am not really sure how much I want the increased high from swinging. I really like the freedom. There are certainly times I am 'disappointed' with the vanilla world.

Once a month would be perfect, but schedules, other interests and kids (times two, because the other couple has that too) leaves a date every few months.

We check this board every day during the week (usually too busy and bad internet prevents checking on the weekends), but as for how often we DO something: we try to keep that at about once a month (on average). Lately we have been seeing another couple more than that, but mostly for vanilla outings...does that count?

We participated about once every two months primarily through our friend couple hosting parties at their house but sometimes by attending a local club or other parties. That said, Red does nothing on the computer for LS, me barely anything until now via this site. As for swinging anyhow, Red is also more the voyeur versus being involved to my exhibitionism of my being with other women. Our attendance may change now as the house hosting couple have separated for reasons unrelated to actual swinging and Red's intense desire for privacy precludes us hosting anyone at our home. (We also don't have children who live with us regularly but who do visit often.)