Rule about kissing or swallowing?

We know a couple who we have been friends with and recently found out they are into the lifestyle. But they have a rule that she doesn't swallow. My wife likes swallowing and it helps to turn her on. We haven't played with this couple, but my wife is not really interested already knowing that they have this rule. We realize swallowing is intimate, but that's what makes it a turn on for both of us. I love to see her swallow another man's cum. We don't play with random couples we don't know, but when we do, we like to be able to have the wives swallow the other man's cum or snowball it. Is this a common rule, or is it situational?

For whatever reason couples make their own rules. Either you deal with or you move on.

The "no kissing" rule is not unusual. If that rule is a turn-off for your wife, then give that couple a pass.

Swallowing rules are a little more complex. Every woman is different -- some will never swallow, some will always swallow, and some will occasionally swallow depending on how comfortable they feel with the guy. This applies whether the woman is a swinger or not. Feel free to ask about this in advance if this is important for your play.

We didn’t have a lot of rules when we started but swallowing was one of the things I told hubby I wouldn’t do and he said, that’s simply up to you. Well, we do what do when we get excited and get get a little more excited than usual when we swing so, our 2nd MFM, there I was swallowing a big load of cum, and again on the 3rd some and so on. You know, do what you enjoy.

We know a couple who we have been friends with and recently found out they are into the lifestyle. But they have a rule that she doesn't swallow. My wife likes swallowing and it helps to turn her on. We haven't played with this couple, but my wife is not really interested already knowing that they have this rule. We realize swallowing is intimate, but that's what makes it a turn on for both of us. I love to see her swallow another mans cum. We don't play with random couples we don't know, but when we do, we like to be able to have the wives swallow the other mans cum or snowball it. Is this a common rule, or is it situational?

You say the other woman doesn't swallow. Does the other couple's rule state that your wife can't swallow his load? It may be their rule simply because she doesn't like it so they give it as a rule so their is no confusion.

Do you need to have a woman swallow in order to feel satisfied? If so then you may be limiting yourself and missing out on some great sex otherwise.

You mentioned kissing in the title but not the body of the post. Is there a no kissing rule as well?

On the subject of swallowing, which my wife does...can stds be transmitted through swallowing. My wife always uses condoms with her partners, then sometimes takes them off to swallow. Does that defeat the whole purpose of using them?

Erik13 said:

On the subject of swallowing, which my wife does...can stds be transmitted through swallowing. My wife always uses condoms with her partners, then sometimes takes them off to swallow. Does that defeat the whole purpose of using them?

There is a whole forum on this board dedicated to this topic

https://www.swingersboard.com/std-and-safe-sex-issues/

You'll get a ton of opinions on right/wrong, good/bad, risky or not. Most of it will be biased in some way.

Additional info can be found here

https://www.cdc.gov/std/healthcomm/stdfact-stdriskandoralsex.htm

It's best to inform yourself with facts and make decisions based on that information.

When we first started playing we didn’t have a discussion about limits. Was I supposed to kiss or not? I let my partner decide. I had no problems kissing, I saw my wife kissing too. My wife has no problem swallowing. It didn’t matter the first time playing. Neither I or the other guy came from a blow job. The first time I was about to cum in her mouth I warned her, not knowing how she would react. She had no problem. I have always warned any partner who has brought to that point. The fun thing is that all the partners do something a little different.

That’s an impressive load, PaDoc! But I can see how Mrs. Doc would bring it all out.

padoc said:

I too always give a warning. Mrs Doc is a swallower, particularly if she's really in the moment but she also prefers a warning so she can decide if she wants to swallow of have him cum on her boobs. Sometimes its a tough call…

I am a swallower since I was first finding out about sex. it is much more intimate and spitting out spoils the mood.

Thanks everyone for the replies. I did try to edit the post to keep it specific to swallowing because I later found a few other threads on the kissing rule and didn't want to keep repeating that topic. Sorry about that, but your responses are appreciated.

As suspected, it is situational and varies based on preference and mood/situations. Makes sense.

It's not that we will not play with the couple because of the rule. It's just kind of a turn off hearing that there are rules, and we may prefer to play with another couple given there is a choice. Otherwise, we may still play with them and just see where it goes. Like someone said, we also don't want to pass up some great sex and other activities because of that.

Agreed! We make love to one another, we boink our friends. That doesn't mean that there aren't tender moments with friends but depth of feelings remain between us. On a side note, we've reduced our rules to just a few, same room to start (1st time anyway), no anal, no pain or humiliation and ladies cum 1st. Damn…we really ARE easy!!

We have had some playmates who take it too far and seem to want to establish a boyfriend-girlfriend atmosphere. We are just playing for fun and exercise. If people cross the boundary, we have a talk if it would help or they are outta here. But we are not big on rules, other than our preferences.

We have had some playmates who take it too far and seem to want to establish a boyfriend-girlfriend atmosphere. We are just playing for fun and exercise.

^^^^Yep, this is us. It's fun, it's exciting, it's fantasy fulfillment but when it's done it's done.

We don't have a whole lot of rules. 1)Same room(because we like watching each other, she's my favorite porn star) and 2)condoms for vaginal penetration. Neither of us are a fan of anal so that doesn't even have to be brought up.

We had discussions about kissing early on and realized that kissing is an integral part of getting turned on and connecting with a sexual partner. It doesn't have to be this big emotional thing.

We've agreed that while we are playing we won't freak out if either of us says or does something that may seem overly emotional at the time chalking it up to the heat of the moment. She, of course, was the one who was more concerned with this in the beginning but she's also the one who becomes more passionate as things progress and now she realizes that trying to hold back some of that passion would detract from the experience. If it is still bothersome afterward we can bring it up and talk about it so that we know to adjust our behavior accordingly next time.

As far as swallowing goes, she will swallow with me and it can really turn her on to do so. I think she sees it as something intensely intimate so I would be surprised if she did it with someone else but I don't think I would have a problem with it. I certainly wouldn't expect it to be reciprocated by the other wife just because she did. That's a very personal choice.

That's a very personal choice.

To be made by the one doing the swallowing.

To be made by the one doing the swallowing.

Of course. I may have made an incorrect assumption that it went without saying. Thanks for clarifying for me for anyone that thought otherwise.

I doubt that many people misunderstood, Agreatguy. I was just underlining the obvious. Thanks for the back-up!

I presume that the other woman does not want to swallow. Unless they clearly say otherwise. I think that is standard operating procedure for swingers.

. True, swinging is about new experiences. But it's also about the feeling of the freedom to make personal choices without fear of one's spouse's wrath.

 

Both my wife and I, but especially my wife, likes the newness and variety of playing around. So I expect that each of us will do things with others that we don't do together, and the things we do will be done differently.

Swallowing isn't something that has ever been discussed before in any encounter I experienced. I've never been in an encounter where any rules were discussed. It's always been a free flow for both my wife and I and when I've been the "third or bull" for another couple.

I always let her know if I'm about to cum so she has a chance to pull away. If she keeps going I assume it's OK to cum in her mouth.

If she stops in time I can control my urge to cum. If she waits until the point of no return it will end up on her face or hair.

Purely situational and dependent upon all parties agreeing to the rules. We had one situation whereas my wife who normally does not care to give head well the guy guided her head down and she gave him head. She was about done when he decided to blow his load in her mouth. He did and he held her head in place almost to force her to swallow. Needless to say we don´t hang with those people anymore.

KnkyCoupl4Coupl said:

We know a couple who we have been friends with and recently found out they are into the lifestyle. But they have a rule that she doesn't swallow. My wife likes swallowing and it helps to turn her on. We haven't played with this couple, but my wife is not really interested already knowing that they have this rule. We realize swallowing is intimate, but that's what makes it a turn on for both of us. I love to see her swallow another mans cum. We don't play with random couples we don't know, but when we do, we like to be able to have the wives swallow the other mans cum or snowball it. Is this a common rule, or is it situational?

Btw my wife swallows. I remember the first time she gave me a blow job she said let me know when you're about to and I did. Guess what she kept going and going next thing I remember she was dominating my dick. I Exploded and I felt like she was the owner of my dick.

We don’t play with guys that assume they can cum in my mouth. If I decide to go down, I'll tell them. It’s rare that I don’t want them to finish - I love making a guy cum and I know they will remember me! I can really suck a cock btw!!

I ask before I come in a woman’s mouth. Even if they say yes, I give them a big warning before I come. I would rather come via intercourse. At my age, it’s only going to happen once per night.

We have no rules on kissing or swallowing with a playmate, but one of our male playmates has a no kissing rule. I am a big fan of cumming via intercourse.

Kissing is a big part of getting turned on for both of us. We're physically affectionate and like a lot of skin-to-skin contact. I'm not saying there's been kissing every time, but a rule against it would never work.

Mrs. E swallows. She's chronically neat and tidy and that's the fastest way to dispose of the mess, and she was clear that she'd be swallowing if we went through with this. If it's landing anywhere else, that needs to be discussed in advance. The anticipation of men cumming on her makes her giggly-nervous, which is very cute but she needs a second to psych herself up.

@ bluespruce1: I am beginning to wish we'd have run into you two on a TPA night. It sounds like we'd have had a blast. Along with couples play, Mrs Doc would often spend 30-45 mins in the glory hole room. She was fun to watch and there was some swallowing going on.

Wow great pic. We would love to see more.

Who knows - maybe you did! I also spent united a bit of time in the glory hole room. He would go on the receiving side - I always loved that he wouldn’t know if it was me or someone else sucking his cock. I ended up in the swing one night there after servicing three guys in the g- hole room. They paid me back 10 fold!

oc1234 said:

I am a big fan of cumming via intercourse.

njbm said:

I would rather come via intercourse..

Make that me too. Blowjobs are foreplay are nice, but not as good as pussy or ass.

When I cum, I want it to be by vaginal intercourse.

I keep seeing this topic coming up. If you are comfortable having sex with a person why put restrictions on what you do? If you normally kiss during sex then kiss. If you don’t have problems with swallowing and it doesn’t bother you then swallow. I know there are those that feel they can’t swallow their own husband. I wouldn’t expect them to swallow another partner.

agreatguy said:

There is a whole forum on this board dedicated to this topic

https://www.swingersboard.com/std-and-safe-sex-issues/

 

You'll get a ton of opinions on right/wrong, good/bad, risky or not. Most of it will be biased in some way.

 

Additional info can be found here

https://www.cdc.gov/std/healthcomm/stdfact-stdriskandoralsex.htm

 

It's best to inform yourself with facts and make decisions based on that information.

Yes, it is risky to have oral sex without a condom. Yes you can get an STD from swallowing, but you can get one too just by touching an area that is infected. It's a choice you have to make based on how well you trust your play partners to be free of STDs. You can't tell by looking if someone has something or not. The CDC has the best information on the subject. I'm a communicable disease nurse and we treat oral STDs often because a condom was not used. Only you can determine the level or risk you are comfortable with. The risk of contracting something us always there.

From a guy's perspective, I love it when she gets me close but I prefer to pull out of her mouth and jerk off to finish. I enjoy having her watch me and I tend to spill a pretty large load. Most of the ladies I m with seem to enjoy watching me cover their tits if they are kneeling or covering my belly and chest if i am laying down. I also love it when they take me back in their mouth after I shoot to keep me going.

We don't have any rules about kissing or swallowing, as we both absolutely love it, its a huge turn on for both of us. My husband has always said he doesn't need a blowjob to get hard as long as he can have a nice passionate kiss with her.

I've always loved to swallow though, its not all about the taste of if its nice or not, its about the affection behind it - men LOVE it when a woman swallows his load. And it is just convenient for me as I've always disliked cleaning up their semen off my tummy/chest/face or wherever.

If it tastes extremely nasty or its a huge load of the thick white sticky cum without the runny clean stuff then I always try ensure I have a drink ready nearby to swig it down straight away, or else sometimes it feels like its stuck halfway down your throat it feels horrible for ages.