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We were surprised

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We are at a nudist resort with swinger overtones. Another couple noticed our hot date and asked us out to dinner. We thought that we had a lot in common, same demographic in age, socio-economic, political, etc. We thought that we were getting along well, all moderately experienced swingers.

 

After dinner, we asked if they wanted to come back to our place. They said no with some lame-o excuse and they did not seem real interested in getting together on another night of our stay.

 

We thought this was a slam dunk. Both of us did. Anyone else ever misread a situation like this?

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Maybe they didn’t see your evening the way you did. Not everyone clicks. Move on. They aren’t interested in you. Don’t let ruin your vacation.

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We've had that happen to us a few times. It's not worth trying to figure out. Life is too short too worry about the people who don't want to play when there are plenty of others who will.

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Thanks for the encouragement. We were thrown for a loop, but will get back on the horse.

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Did you hear one or other say the word 'ostrich' in the conversation about climate? Or perhaps one of them said 'Tupelo' when talking about college football. It's likely that one or the other just didn't feel chemistry and a safe word was used.

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This happens, even to those of us who have been swinging for years. In May, we met a couple who were experienced swingers and we had a lot in common. We had dinner, fun conversation, even a brief make out session in the parking lot and left it that we'd get together soon for serious play time. On the way home Mrs Doc was quite aroused and said, "good call honey, these two are gonna be a LOT of fun". Over the next 6 weeks, we issued a couple of invitations for an afternoon or evening by our pool and got polite "can't, we're busy" replies. We have no idea what the problem was/is but there is no sense in dwelling on it. We figure three invitations, three demurs equals three strikes and you're out. Life is too short and there are too many other opportunities out there to try to figure out what didn't happen with this couple. Just move on OP, that's what we do!

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We have a non-verbal go or no go signal. We did not catch “banana” or whatever their code word. We’re not that crushed that they did not want to play. We’re more disappointed that we misread that we were getting along well.

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Four way chemistry is a lot more elusive than two way chemistry. One of the two of the other couple cast their "not interested" veto. Your tale is as honest and direct as the LS gets, no one "taking one for the team". No point in analysis. Better to reflect on the pleasant time you did have with this other couple, think kindly of them, and move on.

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