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  1. #1

    Default Free to go to him without me

    After many times of them having sex in front of me, I began to leave the room to give them privacy. That progressed to letting her go to his place without me.

    We still have times, parties, where we we will all be in the same room but it is mostly her going to his place without me when she is in the mood for him.


  2. #2

    Default re: Free to go to him without me

    While there can be dangers, we feel secure enough in our relationship that I have been doing this for a few years. Quite early after we started swinging, my husband would leave me alone in the room with the other man after a threesome, letting the two of us play some more. However, more recently, I have traveled alone, even out of town, to meet up with friends. (This is only for men whom I know well. I would never meet a new man alone.)

  3. #3

    Default re: Free to go to him without me

    For us, and from what I read here on the Swingers Board generally, it seems to be part of the progression - from talking about swinging to watching others to soft swap to full swap to separate room to alone play. As long as it is going well and both are comfortable, why not continue exploring?

  4. #4

    Default Re: Free to go to him without me

    Free to go... Well not really. My husband and I have gone with others alone for one reason or another but there are some limits. We play with others to enjoy our sexuality not to exclude the other. My husband leave the room while I'm with others but not because he feels left out or unwanted, maybe he's tired or he found other holes to fill, and the same goes for me. We may go play with others on our own but there are still limits. He won't run off and leave me at home feeling down about the situation or hurt. I've stayed home because I didn't want to play or I was playing with others.

    If your true partner can be pleasured and not care how your feeling have been hurt than they shouldn't be your partner at all. We don't play into the sad pathetic cuck sitting useless on the side just to be insulted.

  5. #5
    Swingers Board Addict adamgunn's Avatar
    Status
    Couple.
    SLS Profile
    sextiescouple

    Default Re: Free to go to him without me

    There was the occasion when either my wife or I would play alone. This was usually when one of us was out of town.

    But normally, we played at the same time in the same general place. If we were in a foursome situation, it was more same room than separate rooms. If we were at a club, we almost always stuck together. If we were at a house party, we might split up, or might not. And if it was a hotwife situation, I'd normally watch for awhile and take pictures, then join in when the guy started slowing down.

  6. #6

    Default Re: Free to go to him without me

    We recently talked and I told my wife it was ok to see her single guy alone once in a while. She went to his place last week while I was sleeping and gave him a bj. I'm still unsure if we made the right decision... I know she wouldn't mind me playing alone if I had the chance.

  7. #7

    Default Re: Free to go to him without me

    Sex is entertainment. We have both gone to movies with other people.

  8. #8

    Default Re: Free to go to him without me

    For me even the few MFM I allowed were not that exciting. I like to be with a woman alone, tried all the group stuff in my early 20's, never got much pleasure out of it, it was just something new to try. My pleasure comes from the intensity of being with a partner, one on one. The discovery, the passion. Even being with 2 women, something all young men dream about, did it, it was fun....but you can't connect with 2 women like you can with one. It's not as deep. Also, in a couple going solo is very very dangerous, maybe not at first but the repetition increases the odds of the special connection that can hurt the marriage. For me swinging was together, full swap with a couple, same room, enjoy the connection, reconnect after. To each their own.

  9. #9

    Default Re: Free to go to him without me

    Our first playing was in separate rooms. It may have been a little too much wine. The night was fabulous. Most will say swinging is just sex, this was romantic sex. We made love. No I don’t love him so please don’t say swinging isn’t about love. I know the difference. We had sex in the same room as my husband and his wife. That was sex. It was much different. I am not interested in women. A FMF is not fun for me. Being with two men was meh. I also don’t need to watch my husband. There is something about being alone with a new partner.


  10. #10

    Default Re: Free to go to him without me

    Quote Originally Posted by M1F2KTJ View Post
    After many times of them having sex in front of me, I began to leave the room to give them privacy. That progressed to letting her go to his place without me.

    We still have times, parties, where we we will all be in the same room but it is mostly her going to his place without me when she is in the mood for him.
    It seems to me from the many posts of yours i have read - that you are the driver in all of this, and it seems that it is progressing - careful my friend that you do not push so hard that you lose the good thing you have.

    Having said that - good luck to you guys if you can make it work.

  11. #11

    Default Re: Free to go to him without me

    Quote Originally Posted by ErikaAndPeter View Post
    While there can be dangers, we feel secure enough in our relationship that I have been doing this for a few years. Quite early after we started swinging, my husband would leave me alone in the room with the other man after a threesome, letting the two of us play some more. However, more recently, I have traveled alone, even out of town, to meet up with friends. (This is only for men whom I know well. I would never meet a new man alone.)
    We have almost the exact same background! I would love to get to know you and your partner. Sent you a PM!

  12. #12

    Default Re: Free to go to him without me

    (M) I went out to dinner alone with the female half of the couple we play with recently. We sat at the bar and made out. It was dangerous and exciting at the same time hoping no one we knew spotted us!

  13. #13

    Default Re: Free to go to him without me

    My wife 63y blonde shorthair going to Italy Toscana with her lafyfriends.Dreaming about a man who takes her.

  14. #14

    Default Re: Free to go to him without me

    I never had a problem with my wife going to play alone with our best friend. That started in the mid 1980s when we started playing with him and his wife. At that time we all had young kids at home and he worked nights and my wife did not work. My wife knew she did not have to ask for my permission. I found it a real turn on at work to realize the two of them might be playing.

  15. #15

    Default Re: Free to go to him without me

    My husband has to travel for business a few times a month. His best friend is the only one we play with that he brought into our bed. My husband suggested that when he is on a trip I should invite our friend over. At first I did feel strange doing this. I didn’t want to feel like I was being used by our friend. The sex with him alone is different than when we have a threesome.
    We Are...

  16. #16

    Default Re: Free to go to him without me

    Quote Originally Posted by PSULioness View Post
    My husband has to travel for business a few times a month. His best friend is the only one we play with that he brought into our bed. My husband suggested that when he is on a trip I should invite our friend over. At first I did feel strange doing this. I didn’t want to feel like I was being used by our friend. The sex with him alone is different than when we have a threesome.
    Beginning in the mid 1980s when we started playing with our best friend, whenever I traveled on business they both knew that I was fine with them playing together. I was happy with this because the two of them really enjoyed having sex with each other and I felt it was great for the two of them to have some alone time together. Even after that, while we were have threesomes with him, I encouraged the two of them to occasionally have alone time with each other. I never felt my friend was using my wife since it was something all three of us wanted.

  17. #17
    Swingers Board Addict padoc's Avatar
    Status
    couple
    SLS Profile
    padoc

    Default Re: Free to go to him without me

    We met a couple 4 years ago with whom we connected and played regularly. Unfortunately, he got cancer. We were supportive and loving all through the chemo and surgeries and recovery. Unfortunately, he is no longer sexually functional. We remain friends. When Mrs Doc has vanilla plans of has to go out of town for family things without me, she often invites the other wife over. She told me over the weekend that she's going back to Pa for a weekend in Sept for a hs reunion but she said, "don't worry honey, I called the sitter". This hobby is so much FUN!!


  18. #18

    Default Re: Free to go to him without me

    Quote Originally Posted by PSULioness View Post
    My husband has to travel for business a few times a month. His best friend is the only one we play with that he brought into our bed. My husband suggested that when he is on a trip I should invite our friend over. At first I did feel strange doing this. I didn’t want to feel like I was being used by our friend. The sex with him alone is different than when we have a threesome.
    We both played alone before swinging and have again since. The experiences are much different alone with someone.
    Do you do different things with your friend alone? Why don’t you do these things with your husband? Do you tell your husband that the sex is different?

  19. #19
    Swingers Board Addict couplers's Avatar
    Status
    female in poly family

    Default Re: Free to go to him without me

    Alone play has two big advantages, it creates more opportunities for sex if you're not hung up on always having to be together, and it's different - it creates more variety.

  20. #20

    Default Re: Free to go to him without me

    My wife is free to travel withoyt me and gave men.She travels a lot with her ladyfriends.

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