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Chicup

A newbies guide to swingers profile photos

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Ok I've been in a posting mood again, and I'd like to talk about the most important part of the profile, the pictures. I don't care what people say about the profile itself, and personality, there is a reason profiles without pictures do not get many emails, we are all "shallow" to some extent.

 

My personal recommendation for pictures.

 

#1 - Nude is fine but not needed. Nothing wrong if you include nude photos, but if you don't thats ok too. What you DO want to do is include photos that actually show your body for what it is. Baggy clothes, winter coats, gilli suits, don't work for this.

 

If you are unhappy with your body for some reason its common to see people try to hide themselves with baggy shapeless clothing. DON'T do this. The reason is simple, you won't be able to hide anything in person or nude, if they are not interested, they still won't be interested, only now you will both have wasted each others time.

 

#2 – Porno shots. There are pros and cons to this. The pro is that it shows you are “real”. For example you can't argue with being called “bi” if it shows you having same sex relations and the like. The cons are that you are not shooting a porno, and poorly done porno is more turn off than turn on. Bad lighting, bad angles, just bad.

 

 

Be very judgmental of yourself in porno style pictures and decide if they are good for your profile or not. If you are not sure, go with “no”.

 

 

#3 – Less can be more. What prompted me to write this was looking at a profile last night. They had 75 pictures in their public gallery, some were nice some where less so. I also wasn't sure if the woman in question (74 of her 1 of him) had been losing weight or gaining it, but there was a good 30 lb difference between the first picture and the last. The big issue here is that given 100 pictures, a few “bad” ones can color the lot. My belief is that people look at profiles for reasons to say no, and the more pictures you have the more reasons to find some that say no, even if it was just a bad picture. You don't need to chronicle your life via your profile. Just use a few, nice quality shots you think give a good representation of yourself.

 

#4 – There is a man as part of the couple. This is the biggest complaint I've seen in swinging and photos. No pictures of the men, or one vague shot wearing jeans at a distance. This is not acceptable unless you are looking for single straight males to have sex with your wife only. The general assumption is no pictures of the man = ugly man. This is not always the case but don't be surprised if you don't see a lot of responses either. You are a couple, you expect some other woman to have sex with you (assuming its the man doing the profile in these cases which I'm sure it is) and you can't really hide anything.

 

But wait you say, I have a high profile job, I can't be online like that. Bullshit. First, I can't tell you how many times I've read that in a profile where they have full nude shots of the woman INCLUDING her face. You know, people that know you will often know what your wife looks like too. If they see her in a profile they sure as hell can guess who the man is. Also I doubt your body is so unique that it can be discerned from a body shot. Don't show your face, thats understandable, but I doubt anyone you know can identify you by your pecs. Male insecurity in their bodies is as high as female when it comes to the brass tacks here, if you don't like your body, hit the gym, but regardless post a picture.

 

#5 – This is part of the porn thing but needs a separate number. Crotch shots. Just say no. If you want to show your junk, show it with a full body shot. Its classier, it conveys the same message, and its usually not nearly as grotesque. There is something very unappealing about the poorly photographed dong or vagina. Don't do that.

 

#6 – Old pictures. No just don't. Bad bad bad. You might have been the shit in 1985, with wash board abs and your wifes flat pre-children stomach to boot. If swinging involved a time machine that would be fine, but it doesn't. You are who you are, and you will only be disappointed pretending to be who you were. If you have a photo that you really think “represents “you and its old, be sure to at least date it and have others which are clearly the current ones.

 

#7 - Be willing to show face shots too. They don't have to be in your public profile, but the face matters too. Don't expect others to show theirs first if you make the contact. No guts no glory.

 

The above, of course, is just my opinion, and therefore 100% correct in all circumstances :hahaha:

 

If you have any to add please feel free!

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Chicup, I'll encourage you to join us for Group Chat this evening at 8 O'clock Eastern Time. The theme that Angelkin has set for us is very much in-line with what you have posted here.

 

Warm regards,

 

SW_PA

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MD and I have a theory and this is applied to what we consider real, paid, and often certified profiles.

 

70% of the profiles are disproportional. He's old, she's young, he's hefty, she's tight, etc. but you get the point. If I had a quarter for every time I saw (in person at a party or club) one of those two examples, it would pay for our next cruise and put us in a suite.

10% are too young (we also put the stuck up elite in this percentage)

20% are normal attractive couples.

 

Now, 20% is a good number but unfortunately you have to add the second overlay scale to those couples.

 

That breaks down like this:

 

Out of that 70% disproportional group (50% of them have awesome personalities, we just don't want to fuck them).

Out of the 20% that fits our attractiveness scale 75% of them are not attracted to us :( and 15% of them are just fucking crazy. That leaves 2 couples that if we don't act fast, the crazies are going to get :lol:

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MD and I have a theory and this is applied to what we consider real, paid, and often certified profiles.

 

70% of the profiles are disproportional. He's old, she's young, he's hefty, she's tight, etc. but you get the point. If I had a quarter for every time I saw (in person at a party or club) one of those two examples, it would pay for our next cruise and put us in a suite.

10% are too young (we also put the stuck up elite in this percentage)

20% are normal attractive couples.

 

Now, 20% is a good number but unfortunately you have to add the second overlay scale to those couples.

 

That breaks down like this:

 

Out of that 70% disproportional group (50% of them have awesome personalities, we just don't want to fuck them).

Out of the 20% that fits our attractiveness scale 75% of them are not attracted to us :( and 15% of them are just fucking crazy. That leaves 2 couples that if we don't act fast, the crazies are going to get :lol:

 

Isn't that the truth!! Couldn't have said it better.

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#6 – Old pictures. No just don't. Bad bad bad. You might have been the shit in 1985, with wash board abs and your wifes flat pre-children stomach to boot. If swinging involved a time machine that would be fine, but it doesn't. You are who you are, and you will only be disappointed pretending to be who you were. If you have a photo that you really think “represents “you and its old, be sure to at least date it and have others which are clearly the current ones.

 

And I WILL be looking for a VCR or tube TV in the background.

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#5 – This is part of the porn thing but needs a separate number. Crotch shots. Just say no. If you want to show your junk, show it with a full body shot. Its classier, it conveys the same message, and its usually not nearly as grotesque. There is something very unappealing about the poorly photographed dong or vagina. Don't do that.

 

Amen. I've said it before, but crotch shot profiles get the no, thank you response.

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One more minor thing as it is fresh on my mind - please rotate your photos so you are not standing sideways. Should go without saying but I saw it three times today!

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There is nothing worse than logging on and seeing 30 pictures need approving and 27 out of the 30 are selfie cock shots of a nappy haired, unshaven cock with a unique grab in each photo. Like tugging it in a different direction is going to make it seem different or more appealing? When I look at these shots, after the temporary blindness and nausea they cause fades, I have to wonder...what the fuck is going through their minds when they are posting them???

 

What does anyone think when they post a selfie with the bongs in the back ground, the prescription drugs scattered all around, the overflowing trash can in the bathroom (PS - taking a nude photo while sitting on the toilet doesn't have mass appeal).

 

:nono:

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To us, it's not just the close-up shots of privates that are annoying, but any other parts as well.

 

For instances, what is it with some profiles and the (sometimes multiple) legs/feet pics? Though I appreciate an attractive female leg and foot, but only as part of the overall package. Unless these profiles are trying to appeal exclusively to foot and shoe fetishists, I really don't see the appeal. Ditto, for the cleavage shots. I'll admit I stare as much as the next man at such things, but I'm not that completely shallow and when deciding to meet a couple I'd like to know there is a rest of the body to go with them puppies as well. We even saw one where one of the pics were just of the woman's hands...really must have wanted to show off that new manicure.

 

Even worse is a pic of a tattoo, especially when that is their only photo. No offense to anyone as I know a lot of people are proud of their body art, but seriously, to me that barbed wire around your arm or leg or that tramp stamp design looks like everyone else's I've seen and tells us nothing about your overall form.

 

Other photos that shout self-importance are a lot of photos of a couple's stuff. Yes, they may be using that sports car, truck or boat as an aid to posing and not just to show it off, but the implication and assumption are still there. Not to mention as not exactly practicing discretion as we actually saw a profile with the woman leaning provocatively leaning against a car with the license number totally unobscured...oops!

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Other photos that shout self-importance are a lot of photos of a couple's stuff. Yes, they may be using that sports car, truck or boat as an aid to posing and not just to show it off, but the implication and assumption are still there.

 

There is a couple which for about a year kept trying to get us interested in them. Their profile pictures included more than one picture of their BIG boat- in the water, out of the water. With no people in the picture at all. Now, they MAY have been just making it clear that they had a nice place to play- but that's sure not the way it came across. We just kept saying no, thank you politely.

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I have to add something..

 

Swinger Photo Rule #24 - If you own a motorcycle you must have at least two shots of said motorcycle and at least one with your wife draped on it.

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I have to add something..

 

Swinger Photo Rule #24 - If you own a motorcycle you must have at least two shots of said motorcycle and at least one with your wife draped on it.

 

My wife and I just purchased bicycles. Should I drape her over the handle bars for a picture?

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