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  1. #1
    Saturday we attended our second house party and It was also our second night out in the Lifestyle. We left having a great evening but we also left with a bit of confusion that I’m hoping you lovely people can help us sort out.

    Our first time out and the first time at this house party went well. We met a lot of cool people and everyone was very friendly, warm and welcoming. We ended up being approached by another couple who we eventually snuck off with and ended the night with them. Going in Saturday night, our game plan was just to get settled in and let the night go where it goes. We were both open to the idea of a single guy, or a couple, or it just being us that night if no one sparked our interest. We arrived, changed into robes and headed for the pool. The shallow end was crowded as usual so we decided to make our way to the less crowded deep end. We disrobed and hopped into the pool. All the men their were literally waiting for Bee to take her robe off, which we both thought was funny. Bee and I took turns looking around and taking sips of our drinks and just settling in. Neither of us really saw anyone we’d be into so we chatted for a bit. We noticed no body was really doing much. The regulars were having their conversations about random topics and the other couples were sort of just quietly hanging out with their SOs. We were both horny and have wanted to have sex in that pool since the last time we went so we figured we’d get the party started. We ended up having sex and when we finished we joked about how there were now other people having sex. Yay!!

    We got out of the pool and made more drinks. We wandered around for a bit saying hi to people as we walked by them. We were noticing all the eyes on us and also the not so subtle looks. It was great to be back. We had a smoke and then decided we’d try out one of the specialty rooms they had there. We had sex again and decided to return to the back yard and put ourselves in a more social area. We wanted and looked forward to chatting with like-minded people since our first visit. Even if nothing progressed with anyone, we still like to talk about sex and we enjoy being with people who are comfortable, open and nonjudgmental on the subject. We sat down and smiled at a few of the women that were chatting. The conversation went instantly quiet. It was like we were intruding. I realized I wanted to grab an ash tray and walked away in search of one. Bee said “hello” to one of them women to which she responded with a “hi” and with what Bee describes as a “snarky” look out of the corner of her eye. I returned and smoked a cigarette with Bee but I could tell she wasn’t feeling it. We decided to go try out one of the other specialty rooms and we did. At this point, the evening just became about just us. We were not feeling the vibe this evening. No one seemed to be interested in talking or really even being social.

    We headed into what is now one of our favorite rooms of the house and had sex. I closed and locked the door because we were no longer interested in having company. A few times, people jiggled the door handle and knocked. This caught us a bit off guard. It was obviously in use! Bee is not quiet. We finished and walked out, one of the guys in the hallway saluted me on the way down the hall which was funny. We made our way back to the pool area again, with the intention of being social. There was a younger couple about our age sitting next to one of the fire pits. The guy had been blatantly eyeing Bee all evening and apparently the female half had been eyeing me as well, according to Bee. We decided to go sit with them. They were cuddling as we sat down and I looked over at them to make eye contact and say hello and hopefully spark up a conversation. She had her eyes closed and he was off looking somewhere in distance. Okay....

    She lifts her head up, gives him some sort of look and they both get up and walk away! What the hell?! As an added note: on our way out of the bathroom upon leaving later the night, Bee exited first and I noticed the female half of that same couple was waiting for the restroom. We made eye contact and she looked like a deer in headlights. I know what that look means. I said “hello” to her as I walked passed and no response.

    Did we do something wrong? Did we break some unspoken rule(s)? We’re trying to understand what happened here. We’ll even take the blame if it was our fault, but I don’t think it was entirely us.

    We look forward to reading any insight and opinions from you folks.


  2. #2
    Swingers Board Addict lcmim's Avatar
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    lcmim
    Are you on good terms with the host(s) of the party?

    From what you say you did nothing out of reason.

    There is a chance that someone else saw, or thought that they saw something and was blabbing it about.
    It is possible some one "recognized" you as someone else who would be persona non grata and was blabbing it about.
    ( That is Jim and Barb , they are HIV + or some such thing.)

    Sometimes the social stuff reminds me of the ugly side of high school.

    At any rate ask the host if you transgressed or if they heard anything.
    A good host does more than just provide a venue. Eyes and ears open all night long to make the party a success.

  3. #3
    Quote Originally Posted by lcmim View Post
    Are you on good terms with the host(s) of the party?
    I would say so. It was only our second time there and our first visit there, most of the guests knew we were newbies to the lifestyle. The owners of the house have an assistant hostess that is mainly in charge of greeting and giving tours. She was the one who seemed to be keeping an eye on us the first night and was making sure we were having fun. She also sort of pushed us a bit the first night there when we had been chatting with another couple for what seemed like an hour. She also remembered us on our second visit, well, Bee says she just remembered me. 😆

    Quote Originally Posted by lcmim View Post
    There is a chance that someone else saw, or thought that they saw something and was blabbing it about.
    It is possible some one "recognized" you as someone else who would be persona non grata and was blabbing it about.
    ( That is Jim and Barb , they are HIV + or some such thing.)
    I suppose someone could have mistaken us for someone else. We don’t know anyone in the lifestyle yet because we have only been to this house twice now. However, though possible that one or both of us could have been mistaken for someone else, we didn’t get the feeling they were all talking behind our backs. It was more of a “shunning” feeling as Bee describes it. Like the new kid at school attempting to get into a conversation with some of social groups.

    Quote Originally Posted by lcmim View Post
    Sometimes the social stuff reminds me of the ugly side of high school.
    That’s exactly what it felt like to us. We thought at first we may have come off as being unsociable or too into ourselves at times. We are quite lovey-dovey and do touch each other frequently. It’s obvious we love each other very much. Were we possibly being too mushy for people? Bee and I sort of feel like our looks could be a reason for the seemingly odd behavior.

    Quote Originally Posted by lcmim View Post
    At any rate ask the host if you transgressed or if they heard anything.
    A good host does more than just provide a venue. Eyes and ears open all night long to make the party a success.
    You know, i wouldn’t have thought to try that. Perhaps I may. It’s not like we didn’t enjoy ourselves and I don’t want to sound as though I’m complaining. Particularly to the host.

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