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Thread: Parents

  1. #1

    Unhappy Parents

    I'm sure that most of us don't want our parents to know what we do in our personal lives.. but sometimes things happen and they find out. Has anyone been in a situation where their parents found out about their lifestyle choices? And if so, what happened? How did you handle it?

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  2. #2


    My mom knows, I told her one night when I was a little tipsy. Not a big deal at all. In fact sometimes I wonder if she and my stepfather might be involved themselves, but she has never volunteered that info!

  3. #3


    I think this is my single biggest fear right now. I really could care less about my parents knowing. Although we are not completely open about everything we do respect each others descisions.

    Tara's parents on the other hand might not handle it to well. She was raised very conservatively and they would not be happy with her (or me) at all. They would still love her and wouldn't do anything "stupid" but it would probably tarnish the relationship.

  4. #4
    Guest CyberMWCouple's Avatar


    I have come to the conclusion that my wife and I both come from swinging backgrounds, but are only just discovering what was really going on, now that we have been swinging. Now there's a puzzerler for you...

    Husband of CyberMWCouple

  5. #5
    Guest CyberMWCouple's Avatar

    Red face

    If my mom ever found out about our swinging life, she'd probably get all her church members together and "lay hands" on us! *Rolling eyes lol* I'm sure in her "before"
    life, she was swinging too, as well as our grandparents!

    Now as a parent myself, if our kids decided to get in to the lifestyle, it wouldn't bother me. As long as both partners agree on this decision, and it won't hurt their relationship, and they practice safe sex, then by all means...I say GO for it!

    Wife of CyberMWCouple

  6. #6


    I think parents finding out about our lifestyle probably ranks up there with STD's as our biggest fear in this lifestyle. It's definately not something I would want to happen.


  7. #7

    Red face

    Hello all, this is my first post around here... it is really refreshing to hear from other people who have the same thoughts that I do!!!

    While my hubby and I have only been trying swinging for the last yr 1 experience and have only had one experience so far, I have had 2 other experiences before we got together. I was still living at home at the time and OUCH!!!! my parents did find out. It was a huge mess. My dad didn't say anything, just kinda stood there and looked stupidfied, but my mother had plenty of colorful things to say. I would definitely say them finding out that I am still in the lifestyle is a nightmare concept.

    (the really ironic thing is I just found out from several family members she demanded her kids cut ties with, that she and dad were in the lifestyle for several years- some people!)

    As for what I did about it... she screamed bloody murder and then we all just pretended it didn't happen. Hows that for disfunctionality


    [This message has been edited by twobookwyrms (edited 03-15-2001).]

  8. #8
    Guest CyberMWCouple's Avatar



    twobookwyrms....That was too funny! Probably wasn't at the time for you, but I'm just glad that wasn't US....OMG!

    We felt that our parents AND grandparents had their days of swinging too. I was raised by my grandparent, and during my highschool years she tried to "encourage" me to not only go out with just one guy, but MORE! *Rolling eyes lol* Now I know what she meant! *LOL*

    Wife of CyberMWCouple

  9. #9


    Well the funny thing is Jeff and I were discussing parnts and swinging and we both agreed that if anyone would have done it my parents would have!LOL But neither of us would want either sets of parents to know what we are up to...his parents would positively freak and mine..who knows??LOL But it is something I am not sure if I want our kids to know about or not..that will probably come later...who knows they might guess eventually..the good thing is the new freedom we have with expressing our sexuality in front of the kids..we talk more openly about some subjects with her even though our eldest acts embarassed to think we have sex..LOL


    [This message has been edited by anandjeff2 (edited 03-22-2001).]

  10. #10
    Guest CyberMWCouple's Avatar


    Close your eyes and imagine your parents having sex. I can see a few different possibilities for what your reaction will be.

    For many, the first reaction is something along the lines of, "Not MY parents! That's DISGUSTING!". As I think back on my childhood, I am convinced that my parents were swinging. I can recall several 'parties' that went late into the night with all sorts of sounds floating up the stairs.

    I don't recall ever catching anyone in the act, or even naked, but now that we are in the lifestyle, I realize just exactly was going on.

    And my reaction to the above? "Sure. Where do you think I came from?"

    Husband of CyberMWCouple

  11. #11


    I did actually tell my mom, in a roundabout way, just a few weeks ago.

    She gasped, then said "you cheat on your husband?!?!?!"

    I said "we don't call it that, mom."

    She said "well, I don't know what else you'd call it. I don't want to talk about it anymore."

    And so we haven't. [Wink]

    We like to do things a little differently...

  12. #12


    I did actually tell my mom, in a roundabout way, just a few weeks ago.
    YIKES! OUCH, EGADS, EEK! You actually just flat out told her?9 OMGoodness, my parents would probably have me committed before I could say "But...wait.."! Scares the heck out of me!

    Not as equally bad tho, but not something I would want to have served up for dinner, would be for one of my kids to find out!
    Remember that human beings are complicated creatures. We like our bedtime routines but dislike routine in our bed times. - Sallie Foley, M.S.W.

  13. #13


    My parents don't know about our sex life but my wife's parents sure do. It's like an open book. She tells them everything to include the 3somes we've had.


  14. #14


    WELL ...

    We live half-a-continent away from our families, so its pretty easy for us to keep this private.

    We did mention to my youngest brother (after his third divorce) that he might explore the lifestyle. Well he LOVES IT. Found a woman (wife #4 to be i think) that enjoys the idea. Maybe its the real-deal for him now.

    Anyway, i couldn't even imagine the look on mom and dad's face if we told them about our lifestyle. [Eek!]
    ... when i get that feel-ing ... i want .. SEX.. UAL HEALING .... [Marvin Gaye]

  15. #15

    Red face

    The idea of either of our parents finding out gives me the willies. This last year has turned my head around. I'm sure my parents have noticed the change in me but don't think they would understand this at all. It goes against many things that they have taught me. Although my mother has been married 4 times so she might come around.

    Really don't want them to find out. It's our business not thiers.


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