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Fundamental Law

Swinging, aging, and durable friendships

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We have been in the LS for more than two decades, and we are drifting further on the aging scale with a combined age of >130 years (!). An unexpected benefit has been the development of durable friendships with a handful of couples that we have met through the LS--couples we look forward to seeing, to sharing experiences, and so on. Such durable friendships are unusual, at least for us, and it is a bit startling to realize that we have at least as many such durable friendships from our LS experiences as from our vanilla lives.

 

As a matter of curiosity, what has been the experience of others who are aging in the LS? Have you also developed such durable friendships over the years? If so, what are the things you value most in those friends?

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Hello, this is Mike writing. While we have nothing near your experience in the LS I can tell that we are already heading down a similar path. Our tendency is to develop friendships with our playmates. At this moment I am waiting for my bride to finish getting ready to visit for dinner and a movie with one of the couples.

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We have had an excellent relationship with our LS friends ever since we had our first experiences when we were 29 y/o. Now in our 60's we still keep in touch with many sexy people and play at house parties and the occasional club visits. Of course New Years Eve is always a challenge when trying to decide on the best party option. Our past experiences have been trips to resorts with as many as sixteen area couples and quite a few hotel takeovers. Yes and we have even had a few “parties” when folks have passed away. We have always been grateful that we started with LS fun fairly early on in our lives and we have never had any regrets.

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We have had an excellent relationship with our LS friends ever since we had our first experiences when we were 29 y/o. Now in our 60's we still keep in touch with many sexy people and play at house parties and the occasional club visits. Of course New Years Eve is always a challenge when trying to decide on the best party option. Our past experiences have been trips to resorts with as many as sixteen area couples and quite a few hotel takeovers. Yes and we have even had a few “parties” when folks have passed away. We have always been grateful that we started with LS fun fairly early on in our lives and we have never had any regrets.

 

glad to hear that :claps:

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Have you also developed such durable friendships over the years? If so, what are the things you value most in those friends?
Short answer, yes. I regard to establishing swing relationships, I have almost from the beginning believed, "fuck first; friendship often follows." Among friendships that have developed, it is very difficult to bullshit people with whom you are intimate and it is difficult for them to bullshit you. Makes for truly sincere relationships.
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From our very beginning we have looked for friends with benefits...so we look for others that we would like to be friends with first, but with everyone having the knowledge that benefits were always an option. We have met several couples that we were interested in becoming friends with, or having 'benefits' with, but we have also been very lucky to develop at least one relationship combining the two, and it has been AWESOME! We try to get together at least once a month (if not more), go away for weekends together, take vacations together, etc. Right now one of them is having some medical issues so we are all having medical issues together...

 

With the good comes the bad, but we are all there for each other and will probably always be. If anything happens to one of us, we know that the others will be there to help. I am looking forward to when we can resume sharing the good times again, but stand unwavering while we go through the tough times.

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Good topic. Wife & I have been together 21 years (married at Hedo in 2007). Although we have many vanilla friends, our closest friends are those we met in the LS. Do we still have sex with them?. Yes, but not as often as you might think. It is now a true friendship (still with benefits). We travel together and enjoy life.

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Revisiting this topic. 

 

Rereading our thoughts from three years ago, and reflecting on the pandemic and its effects on relationships, our perceptions have not changed. We made new friends on our LS cruise four months ago, and we continue to get together with our LS friends. Even with the passage of time and the challenge of these times, our LS friendships are most durable, perhaps surprisingly so. 

 

For those who have been in the LS since before the pandemic, does this resonate? Or have you had different experiences?

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