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Thread: Bar Pickups

  1. #1

    Default Bar Pickups

    So this morning we started talking about the idea of having Mrs. E pick up a new playmate in a bar over the long weekend. It felt like a great idea when I was fucking her, then I was going to drop it, but she brought it back up again on her own tonight and we're game.

    When we did something like this on vacation, it was after a half dozen duds when prospective vanilla playmates realized there was another man in the picture and scattered. We'd like it to be a little less drawn out than that, and I know a lot of couples here have had some fun this way. Any advice on how to approach this and introduce the idea?


  2. #2

    Default Re: Bar Pickups

    Well, remember that most people aren't wired for this in the 'vanilla' world. Some experience can be invaluable. A swing club may be a more appropriate environment. As far as sex with an inexperienced guy in a bar, we only let Captain Kirk go where no man's gone before.

  3. #3

    Default Re: Bar Pickups

    We do this but its with the goal of MFM at the end of the evening. Normally, hubby is right there with me, we sit at the bar, eat or drink, and some guy will start to chat with us. At some point, I hubby may kind of drop out of the conversation and if become interested, I’ll move it from chat to flirt to seduce. Often makes for an fun evening even if it just ends along the way.

  4. #4

    Default Re: Bar Pickups

    We have picked up girls at the bar but have not tried the male thing yet.

    We do know of a couple that the male part sets up a few single guys in the LS to secretly meet at a bar and to flirt with his wife (wife is aware but does not know who the guys are) if she finds one attractive then they take it to a hotel. We asked why, and they responded itís safer that way due to the fact that the males are in the LS and know how to work with couples. Just a thought that may work for you guys.

  5. #5

    Default Re: Bar Pickups

    Quote Originally Posted by 2NoLimit View Post
    We have picked up girls at the bar but have not tried the male thing yet.

    We asked why, and they responded it’s safer that way due to the fact that the males are in the LS and know how to work with couples. Just a thought that may work for you guys.
    Wow, don’t know why that never occurred to us.

  6. #6

    Default Re: Bar Pickups

    We have done this a number of times with different outcomes. You are right that guys will run when you tell them that there will be another man watching. Most men have never had that experience and are totally freaked. There are two places we have had success. One is a hotel where businessmen stay. We go to the bar separately. Mike usually keeps his distance. He enjoys watching me come on to men. Be careful I have been accused of being a prostitute. The process can take time. Sometimes two or three drinks before moves are made. Like what was said some men run and refuse.
    The other fun thing is going to a hotel near Met Life stadium the weekend of a football game. There are normally groups of fans from the visiting team. Guys who are drinking and having fun.
    We are not always successful. If we aren’t we make our own fun.

  7. #7

    Default Re: Bar Pickups

    Quote Originally Posted by TricianMike View Post
    You are right that guys will run when you tell them that there will be another man watching. Most men have never had that experience and are totally freaked.
    That's pretty much summed up our experience. So we made some adjustments. Mr. A wouldn't be in the room, but I'll keep my mobile phone line open or, if the guy is not shy, I'll have Facetime going and leave my phone on the nightstand so Mr. A can see.

  8. #8

    Default Re: Bar Pickups

    I had a strange bar experience. I hit on one of the regulars at the bar me and the wife go to...she had no idea we were in the lifestyle. She was extremely confused about the whole thing...the next day I FB messaged her to apologize for making things awkward. She's said it's ok and we can go further as long as my wife is ok with it.
    Well we invited her over the house last weekend...I made a move on her and she had zero interest whatsoever. I'm so confused as to why she came over fully knowing our intentions?

  9. #9

    Default Re: Bar Pickups

    Erik - I would guess she came over because she was interested but maybe once there wasn't exactly feeling it. It doesn't mean she was obligated to go further.


  10. #10

    Default Re: Bar Pickups

    Quote Originally Posted by Jane1902 View Post
    Erik - I would guess she came over because she was interested but maybe once there wasn't exactly feeling it. It doesn't mean she was obligated to go further.
    Agreed 100%. I won't make anymore moves and will keep it as friends unless she initiates it.

  11. #11

    Default Re: Bar Pickups

    " we can go further as long as my wife is ok with it.
    Well we invited her"


    1ST "we"= you and her
    2nd "we"= you and your wife

    Is it possible she was thinking one on one with you and a threesome with possible girl/girl action was not in her wheelhouse?

  12. #12

    Default Re: Bar Pickups

    Hmmm. We never suggested a threesome...my wife was just going to watch. I feel bad...I think I confused the hell out of the poor girl .

  13. #13

    Default Re: Bar Pickups

    I think you have to execute lifestyle moves at lifestyle events. Vanilla people find it baffling. Even hooking up with other lifestylers can be a kabuki dance of misunderstood intentions.

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