How to meet a single female:

HOW TO MEET A SINGLE FEMALE

(Feel Free To Add You Own Ideas / Tactics Below)

I have been involved with the swinging lifestyle for sometime now and over the years perhaps ones of the biggest questions I have heard is people asking how to meet a single women?

For a lot of couples interested in this lifestyle perhaps one of the most ideal situations would be to meet a nice clean single female who lives locally and who doesn’t have too much experience for comfort, that many couples desire to meet a nice attractive women with whom they can build a fun open minded friendship and explore the fabled MFF threesome without putting their lives at risk, sadly however a lot of couples have no idea how to make this a reality.

FIRSTLY: Lets look at or even dispel some of the options.

1 - ONLINE: Well like we all know there are numerous swinging websites on the internet but just speaking from experience the number of real genuine single women on those sites is very limited indeed, in fact you could say for every 1 genuine female profile there are 1000 single men which already stacks the odds against you, however there are also various other issues with such sites.

Fake Profiles: From my experience I’d say a large number of so called single women’s profiles on line are actually fake profiles where people pretend to be women, which personally I find very disturbing. These people are sometimes young idiot single males trying to play jokes on people, or they are companies working for other swinger sites, in some cases websites have been accused of creating fake female profiles themselves to drag in even more couples and male members.

Inactive Profiles: Sadly we also have to consider just how many inactive profiles there are on these websites which means the women on the profile is real, they are genuine, but sadly they no longer use that account and have not logged in for some years and probably never will again.

Couples: In many cases I have noticed that some couples will start single female profiles, then once you begin chatting with the “Single Women” she announces that her boyfriend or husband would like to watch or even join in which might not be what you had in mind.

Single Men Sadly another big factor to consider is that when a genuine single women does join a swingers site then in many cases they are messaged / spammed by virtually every single man within a 200 miles radius, if not more. Its not actually uncommon for a single women to receive messages from single men in different countries, that actually single women's profiles can sometimes receive hundreds if not thousands of messages within a matter of weeks which not only scares away the single women and buries them in messages but makes your chances of been spotted very slim.

Other Factors: Well we also have to consider the sea of other factors, such as the women in question may live to far away from you, or perhaps they are simply out of your age range, or have some other factor that plays a role in your decision or ability to play with her.

Overall: If we take into account the limited number of single female profiles, the fake profiles, the inactive profiles, the couples pretending to be single women, the sheer amount of single men trying to contact these women, and then we also add in environmental issues such as location then basically the number of genuine female profiles in a couples area can be very limited indeed, or even zero.

2 - CLUBS: Well many people would suggest going to a swingers club to try and meet a single female, but firstly very few areas actually have swingers clubs, and even fewer areas have decent well run clubs that are clean and safe. However this is just my personal opinion but I’d say in many cases you would be hard pushed to meet a genuine single women at a swingers club because to my knowledge not many single women do attend such clubs alone and if if they do you could say a lot of couples or single men will be wanting their attention and friendship, in other words get in the cue to meet her.

I would also say that in my experience a lot of couples out there are looking for a single female to become friends with, someone who they can experience this lifestyle with on a regular ongoing basis, that many couples are concerned about STD’S / STI’S and would prefer someone with less partners, that they would prefer someone who has a little loyalty towards their friendship together, where as single women who do attend clubs perhaps have too many partners or already have private friends that they can see away from the club again making your chances slim.

3 - FRIENDS: Sometimes a couple will consider asking one of their own female friends to consider playing with them, that sure in many cases we all know a friend who seems perfect, a friend who is single, lonely, clean and seems really fun and open minded. However we have all seen and heard the huge amount of “Horror Stories” connected to playing with friends and how it can backfire onto your entire life with some rather nasty results, personally I do not suggest asking friends.

OVERALL: I am not saying swingers clubs or websites are bad as some people have great success using them, but truth be told other people struggle very badly using them, some people don’t even have a swingers club within a 100 miles of their home. However you could also say that single women who do use websites and clubs would often have to many other options and offers to make a stable friendship last every long which at times can be upsetting.

For example a lot of couples will meet a single women from a website, they will speak for some weeks, they will spend time and effort arranging social meetings, they will spend time effort and even money travelling to see this women, they will spend some hours discussing the women as a couple, they will then have several fantastic meets with the women in question after which the women simply meets a new couple or new single man and vanishes off into the night making a ongoing friendship hard.

HOW TO MEET A SINGLE WOMEN?

Well in my honest experience the best and easiest way to meet a genuine single women to explore your fantasies with is in REAL EVERYDAY LIFE…

Firstly please remember swinging / threesomes / group sex is actually a growing subject, that you do NOT need to be on a swingers site or in a swingers club to consider a threesome, that ANYONE out there would actually consider a threesome if asked in the correct way. Please imagine that I got a clip board and I walked around my city simply asking random women if they would consider a threesome, like I was simply doing a totally anonymous survey, well my guess is maybe 40% of them would probably say “Yes Why Not” and think the idea sounds fun and exciting.

Yes okay they might be a little confused by the subject at first, they might not fully understand what you are asking but basically ANYONE would at least “Consider” having a threesome if asked. I myself have had a fair share of MFF threesomes and honestly I met nearly everyone of them in REAL LIFE, I met everyone of them simply by ASKING someone to consider it, and yes it does work.

HOW I ASK A SINGLE WOMEN FOR A THREESOME?

Well asking a single women for a threesome simply relies on two things.

1 - Your ability to be friendly.

2 - Your ability to make small talk with a stranger.

For example you could be at a bar / nightclub / sports event / organised trip / even shopping / I personally met one girl for a MFF threesome whilst sat waiting for a train. However if you can simply strike up a normal everyday conversation with that women then the first step has been completed, you can talk about anything, the weather, the bad train journey’s you have had, or even just how their day is going. From that point my next port of call is to find out if they are single?

I would usually ask a very innocent question such as:

“So are you not out with your boyfriend / husband today then?”

“So are you heading to see your boyfriend / husband today then?”

If the women replies YES and that she is meeting her partner I would reply.

“Oh that’s nice, I wish my partner was here today, bit lonely on my own”

From which point I’d not ask her about a threesome and simply continue some small talk.

However if the women says “No I’m not meeting anyone, I’m single”

Then I’d follow on to the next step which is perhaps the most vital.

The trick here is to actually ask a women for a threesome but without asking them DIRECTLY and there are various way you can do this, for example you can ask questions such as:

1 - “Hey I suppose this is really weird but I could actually do with a females opinion on this, the other day one of my friends told me that him and his wife are considering a threesome and he asked me what I thought he should do, what do YOU think of that situation?”

2 - “I watched a really strange program on TV the other night it was all about threesomes, what do YOU think about that subject?”

3 - “I guess this sounds a bit strange but I was at work the other day and one of my work mates was speaking about threesomes, I found it really strange, what would you do if a work mate was speaking about that, what do YOU think of that situation?”

4 - “Do you use Face Book, last time I went on one of my friends had posted a weird picture about threesomes, I thought such stuff was banned on Face Book, what do YOU think of that subject?”

The KEY point here is simply to ask that single women what THEY THINK about threesomes?

If the women replies by saying….

“Eeeewwww that is disgusting I’d never do that”

Then you know the women’s answer is NO.

If the women gets upset with you for mentioning the subject you can simply say:

“Oh sorry I was just asking for a women’s opinion really, I was a bit lost when my friend mentioned it so was wondering what someone else would say that is all”

Plus shortly after you can leave anyway.

HOWEVER if the women says:

“Yeah a threesome sounds fun, if it was done right it could be fairly exciting I guess”

Then you have just received a POSITIVE ANSWER

I would usually reply to that by saying something like:

“Well this is perhaps a little out of the blue, perhaps a little weird but I’d like to speak with you more, could I perhaps have your number or add you to Face Book or something like that, would you mind?”

You could even say:

“Well there is something strange I’d like to chat with you about, can I have your number or something?”

If the women gives a very positive answer and says a threesome is something she has always wanted to try, something she would be very open to you could simply say:

“That’s funny because me and my partner really want to try a threesome as well. I know this is all a bit random but would you like to meet again as friends?”

THE OUTCOME?

Well in years past I have used the tactics above, like stated at one point I was sat waiting for a train and made small talk with a women sat next to me, maybe two weeks later she was laying naked in my bed with me and my partner. On another occasion I met a girl in a pub and did exactly what I have described above and we tuck her home for a threesome that same night. In another example I was once at BBQ and met a new girl and again I did exactly what I have said above and within a week or two she was round at our house snuggled up to us both totally naked, and so on.

The trick here is simply to ask a women if they like the idea of a threesome WITHOUT asking her for a threesome directly. If you walk up to a random women and ask them to have a threesome you perhaps might get shouted at or even slapped, however if you simply ask a new women for advice, for their opinions on the subject because remember one of your friends was talking about it and you didn’t know what to say, then a lot of people don’t get upset by someone asking for advice.

Perhaps the best way to start such a conversation is by saying…..

“Hey I know this sounds really weird, I know its a really strange subject but I could honestly use a females prospective on this. I don’t really have anyone to speak with about this and feel a little silly speaking to someone I know really well but basically the other day one of my friends told me him and his wife was considering a threesome with someone, they didn’t say who but he asked my advice on what him and his wife should do, what is YOUR opinion of that subject? What would YOU say?”

I guess a lot of people will jump all over this and say NO, NO BE HONEST, That been direct and honest is the right way. But like stated if you ask a new women directly for a threesome they can become offended or upset, in my honest opinion its better to “Probe” their feelings on the subject first and if they give a positive answer then ask to meet them again, ask for a number or email ect.

I will say however that convincing someone to have a threesome with you can be fairly difficult, that simply meeting someone at random and then convincing them to have a threesome can be hard, however you have to focus on the good points, that you’re a honest fun clean couple just looking to make a real friend, that you really do like them and would be more than happy if they said yes ect.

OVERALL:

I’m not saying my way is perfect, I’m not saying you can’t meet a single female another way, I know other people will do different things, but personally for me I find asking a women about threesomes without asking her for a threesome directly is a good option, its worked for me numerous times.

I find sometimes couples get confused, they want to know how to ASK a women to join them, but I guess that is the point you don’t actually have to ask a women to join you directly to find out if they would be open to the idea. I find this tactic works so well because if the women your speaking to takes offence its so easy to “Back Out” simply by saying.

“Hey I’m sorry I didn’t mean to shock you I was simply asking for advice, to be honest my heads really confused since my friend mentioned it and I don’t know what to say to him”

In my own life I have had 2 or 3 women take offence to that line of questioning and each time I have been able to back out without a fuss, that its hard to get upset with someone when they have not asked you directly. In my eyes any single women out there would “Consider” a threesome all you have to do is ask what their opinions are on the subject and you will find out if its a yes or no.

To me the single girl sat waiting for a train is a potential partner, the waitress who seems chatty is a potential partner, the women in the bar waiting for her friends is a potential partner. In many cases you can even play it off as a joke, for example a waitress walks up to you and delivers your food and seems responsive to chatter, you could simply say something like.

“Hey I know this is totally weird and out of the blue but a friend just messaged me saying him and his wife had a threesome, what the f**k should I say to that message? How weird, what a strange message to send, what would you think if someone messaged that? What do you think about that subject?”

I remember one girl I met specifically, me and my girlfriend at the time met her in a bar, I used the very same tactics as above to get her base opinions on the subject. After a few drinks we went outside and sat on the grass, it was a gorgeous sunny day and we all chatted more, the girl had responded well to my line of questions, she said a threesome sounds really cool, so when we were sat outside on the grass I waited for the opportune moment and simply said:

“What I would like is to take you both home tonight and f**k you both together?”

Both girls looked at each other and giggled and then said “Yeah Okay” so I did!!

My line if questioning, me asking the girl without asking her had secured us a new play partner

Anyway I’m rambling but just remember anyone out there would consider a threesome in my experience all you have to is find out if they are for or against the idea. It surprised me to find out a lot of single women are actually okay about the idea

I hope this helps someone or simply gives them a few ideas, the real beauty here is if the women does take offence you were only asking for advice, you wasn’t asking them directly was you

Happy Hunting x

Thank you!!! Excellent advice. I always wondered how to bring it up at a regular bar.

any website suggestion to get single female?

Hi, this is Petra. Perhaps my stumbling around in this area can be of some help. We aren't and never were real swingers per se just poly, but started with my boyfriend, now husband, allowing me to keep seeing and playing with my ex-boyfriend. Hubby wasn't expecting reciprocity so long as he could pull my pants down whenever he wanted, and besides I was too jealous anyway. That all changed when a girl friend of my said she thought my husband was attractive and that it would be nice to sleep with him. In my jealousy and anger I calmly replied, "That can be arranged." She played with him, and over the next several years so did about a half dozen other women (two of whom are now make up the female part of our family), all arranged by me.

I learned my lesson and took my cue from that first experience by over time gently "courting" my female friends and acquaintances by taking them shopping, to dinner, on vacations. At some point I asked what they though of my husband. I never pressured them into anything, but let them share thoughts and talk. A few ended up in sex with my husband and/or me, but in any event there was never any bad feelings or regrets.

Hope this helps.

As a single female I will add my first mfm came to be because a man I just met was flirting shamelessly with me and brought it up. I had to wonder if he was reading my mind as it was just what I had been looking for and had only tried Craigslist (had to start somewhere, eventually learned more). Now I am on a site and can easily weed out the creepy/ fake men but it's the couples that have challenged me to the point I will no longer meet couples online, only at parties. Why? My profile says I want to hear a voice and often after getting a phone number and sending a text next request is for more pics. (Single guys miss that too so if no call despite my requests to chat I move on quickly.) Also one man wanted to protect his wife's privacy so he would verify if I was real before having us talk, they were the one's that initiated contact. I had already said I was willing to meet for coffee. Next couple she got snippy and said I wasn't the woman for them when I questioned her experience as the profile seemed to indicate it was still a fantasy and I didn't want to be their first experience. Again they contacted me. I took couples off my interest.