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I've been getting mean while cuckolding

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We fulfilled my husband's fantasy of watching me fuck another man a couple months ago. I've only done it a handful of times so far but am really getting into it. I love and respect my husband a lot but the strangest thing is happening. While I'm fucking the other guy, I say some mean things to my husband. The past couple times, I've told my husband how much better the other guy is and that I wish his dick was bigger. Things like that. These things just pop out of my mouth. Downright cruel thoughts creep into my mind but I manage to keep those to myself. We've never played with humiliation before. He doesn't seem to mind too much but I know those comments aren't his favorite. Any thoughts or insights as to why I get mean while fucking another guy?

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I don't know what the rest of your life is like at home and work, so just guessing here, but maybe it makes you feel totally in control and that feeling is lacking in other areas? When you are playing in this scenario, you are in total control of your own sexuality and freely exhibiting it, you are in control of the guy you are fucking, and you are in control of your husband too and the more you let that be known, the better you feel. Get all of those things working together and I can see how they would start to feed off of each other and spin up into a very heady sensation indeed.

 

If there is a line here, I think it can be found in what your husband thinks. If he is ok with that being part of the game, even though it may not be his favorite part, then no harm done I think. But, if it crosses the line from being part of the game to being truly hurtful for him or causing you too much regret later, then it might be best to try to tone that element down or replace it with something just as rewarding but less potentially hurtful.

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This is a very very dangerous path you are going down. Please be careful.

 

If you want some truth about cuckolding then go to the website ourhotwives dot com. You have to be careful to separate the wheat from the chafe but there are some very very wise people on there and some couples who tell the truth vs just playing to the jerk-off crowd. It may be very beneficial to you.

 

There are people,who,talk about how their marriage blew up when the respect was lost to those that are happier today because they recognize the difference between the game and real life.

 

If you are going to do this go slow to understand and make sure that you are both on board and that your marriage comes first. Best of luck and hope you enjoy yourself.

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Welcome from Oklahoma, YourSexyPanties!

 

It's more fun and a lot sexier to say complimentary, if outrageous, things to your husband... and to the guy you're fucking. Try it. The man you love will appreciate you much more.

 

Read the free sample of our novel for some ideas.

 

Alura

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Thank you for the advice! I should probably give a couple more details. I've talked about it afterward with my husband. I apologized because it sounded harsh as the words were leaving my mouth. He said it's fine because he then knows I'm really enjoying myself. Watching me with the other guy is a massive turn on for him as well as hearing about it from me. I just know I'm tip toeing into new uncharted territories. We've had more sex lately than we ever have and sometimes he asks me to talk about the other guy. So, I know it isn't totally out of bounds. However, I know what's in my head and it surprises me. I've never been one to degrade or talk down. I'm wondering where my own head is! I know I enjoy it but it's not only about my pleasure.

 

Oh and when finding a guy, it was paramount to my husband that the new guy have a bigger dick than he does. So I believe there are some deep rooted humiliation fantasies in there. Maybe I'm wrong though.

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Just a thought... are you drinking and if so, what? I have discovered fireball and tequila (not mixed, just either or) cause me to be a little bit less nice than usual!

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Just a thought... are you drinking and if so, what? I have discovered fireball and tequila (not mixed, just either or) cause me to be a little bit less nice than usual!

Ha I love it. The boys drink whiskey and tequila but I stick to wine and vodka cocktails. I haven't been drunk yet when we've done this. Just a little liquid courage to get the ball (or should I say balls haha) rolling.

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I don't know what the rest of your life is like at home and work, so just guessing here, but maybe it makes you feel totally in control and that feeling is lacking in other areas? When you are playing in this scenario, you are in total control of your own sexuality and freely exhibiting it, you are in control of the guy you are fucking, and you are in control of your husband too and the more you let that be known, the better you feel. Get all of those things working together and I can see how they would start to feed off of each other and spin up into a very heady sensation indeed.

 

If there is a line here, I think it can be found in what your husband thinks. If he is ok with that being part of the game, even though it may not be his favorite part, then no harm done I think. But, if it crosses the line from being part of the game to being truly hurtful for him or causing you too much regret later, then it might be best to try to tone that element down or replace it with something just as rewarding but less potentially hurtful.

Very well articulated thank you. I am a bit of a timid person and this is by far the most wild thing I've done sexually. As cheesy as it sounds, I feel like I'm discovering sex for the time again. I've never experienced the aggression (I guess is the best word) I've felt during sex. It runs through my mind like porn clichés. I like to think I'm giving myself permission to take control for the first time, just as you mentioned. Thank you

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Guest sandraandalex

If you're playing a 'role' then you're not as psychologically culpable. Deep down, the "real" you, the one others perceive, would never fuck another man. Yet, the role playing you would...and a whole lot more. Your actions resolve the two different selves that exist. "Calling Dr Freud, Dr Jung"...

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You are not the only one who spews some verbal humiliation during play. My husband and I frequently act out cuckold fantasy in threesome situations and sometimes I just get too much into the moment and say the same things you did. Like others said, communication with your husband is vital here. For us, we understand it's a fantasy role play and I limit my outbursts to cuckold role play. I don't say any of those things during foursome or couple play. I think having mutual understanding and clear boundaries can make for better fantasy which leads to better enjoyment for you and your husband.

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As others have said, only communication will make this go well.

 

As a general rule, I think a far more men enjoy for the other guy to be “built up” by you, the wife or girlfriend. But are not so turned on by having themselves being degraded.

 

See the difference? :)

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