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  1. #1

    Default Dear Deidre: My Hubby asked me to have sex with another man

    MY husband kept pressuring me to have sex with another man and tell him all about it.

    So she finally did, but didn't tell him. She doesn't feel bad. How can he ask her to do this, etc.

    The response:
    DEIDRE SAYS:Your husband may well truly love you but has some sort of emotional damage that stops him appreciating true intimacy and feeling satisfied by having loving sex with you.
    If he watches a lot of pornography, that could further blunt his sexual appetite.

    Full article

    Um yeah. So, evidently swingers don't appreciate true intimacy. This is one of the strangest answers I've seen yet.
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  2. #2

    Default Re: Dear Deidre: My Hubby asked me to have sex with another man

    That's just uninformed stupid advice.
    Having feelings different than what "society trains us" is not a psycological problem.

    This is why so many people keep their feelings hidden and act out on things secretly. The number of bi/curious men is probably 20 times the written statistic. But they sneak around instead of being open about it.

    I get a powerful thrill when my wife is with someone else. Its no different than any other sexual interest. To me its completely detached from "regular life" and has no bearing on us as a couple. Its play world.

    If you could get in everyone's mind and see their sexual interests, the whole world would have to be committed to a nuthouse by some peoples standards.

  3. #3

    Default Re: Dear Deidre: My Hubby asked me to have sex with another man

    I have, for a long time, been cynically amused at the general population's enthusiastic persecution of ANYTHING that is a variation from their norm. Ironically, people don't even feel the need to keep pointing the finger outside of their social group; it seems as the enthusiasm is even stronger to fracture an existing group by pointing out some members' deviation and rejecting them for it.

    It is almost like collectively, humanity has grown bored with all healthy interaction and seeks to break itself. This sort of judgmental "wisdom" just being a single example of it.

    As long as there are holdouts though, there is hope. As long as a few people hold on to the idea that simply treating each other well, without conditions or expectations, has its own reward, there is a chance that people will grow tired of the sickness and move toward more acceptance.

  4. #4

    Default Re: Dear Deidre: My Hubby asked me to have sex with another man

    That's the worst advice I have ever read. I think more telling than the husbands' desire to see her with someone else is her statement that she doesn't think she wants to be married to him anymore. I think she has felt that way a long time...not just since she finally had "uncomplicated sex".

  5. #5

    Default Re: Dear Deidre: My Hubby asked me to have sex with another man

    "Tell your husband that he risks losing you..."

    Uhhh....I thought that was a foregone conclusion. When you're that emotionally detached from your spouse, your relationship is pretty much fucked.
    Fear is a symptom of ignorance. Knowledge is the cure.

  6. #6

    Default Re: Dear Deidre: My Hubby asked me to have sex with another man

    Strange!

  7. #7

    Default Re: Dear Deidre: My Hubby asked me to have sex with another man

    Any couple need to assist?

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