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sc3way

Height/weight proportional - yeah right

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I have been looking at all kind of ads and have found tons that look like great people then those 3 little letters are thrown in: HWP. I'm not thin, but I'm not obese either. My hubby loves my breast size and I'm working on losing weight but I'm comfy with who I am. Why is it that no one bothers to see me for my personality instead of just looking at my measurements?

 

Thanks... the wife.

 

BTW: I'm 38F-35-40 and 5"5

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Guest <Chicup>

Because they are looking for someone to have sex with.

 

I know a lot of women with great personalities I wouldn't want to have sex with. If you are happy with who you are thats great, but why should you expect other people to be happy with having sex with you just because you are happy with who you are?

 

There seem to be a lot of couples who don't care about weight and you should look for them, many post in this forum.

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Hi ya sc3way wife. :)

 

My wife is the same height as you and just a tiny bit smaller. Actually a lot smaller in the breasts. But hey, I think she is gorgeous. I pick her up and swing her around like she is my little doll and she squeals with delight. Your personality is the most important thing. Are you kind and fun to be with is what counts. I can picture you in my mind and I think that you would be just an awesome looking lady. Don't get all bummed out over the HWP folks. There are enough really nice folks who do not care about this issue that you shouldn't be bummed. Everybody has different tastes is all. I picture you as stunning. Someone else may not. It is their loss. :D

 

As long as you like yourself and are comfy with that. Then you are able to relax and meet others who can truly appreciate you. It is not necessary that absolutely everyone loves you is it? I didn't think so. You said "Why is it that no one bothers to see me for my personality instead of just looking at my measurements". Well I happen to believe that there are a lot of folks like my wife and I that think that personality is way way more important than measurements. (Let me throw in a disclaimer here - my mother is 5ft 2in and well over 300. I do not find that size very appealing, but there are men who love her.)

 

If you folks are ever planning a trip to Colorado, then give us a shout and we would love to take you to dinner and show you around. :cool:

 

Besides, I'll make you feel really great. That is if you don't mind a bit of drool on ya.

 

FYI: I am 6ft and buff but not a person that is overly concerned with HWP. :D

 

Have a lovely day. Tell hubbs hi from me. I hoped this made sense and helped.

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I hate those ads that state HWP. Too bad for those folks because they are losing out on a LOT of great opportunities. I'm a size 18-20 and very comfortable with who I am. Oh well, I guess if they were looking for a life partner, it's one thing, but aren't we all in this basically for friendship and sex :confused:

 

I've posted on a site specifically for BBW, thinking I would get some response there. It's been 2 months and counting, and not even a nibble.

Their loss, not mine.

 

Keep your chin up my friend. From the posts I've read thus far, I think people here are more "liberal" in their thoughts concerning HWP and BBW. Only time will tell. ;)

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Guest <TommyBoy2>

Large is unhealthy and unattractive to all except a small minority. (Ironic how the *small* minority likes the larger women.)

 

Why are you even asking the question? Figure out who you are. If you are actually large, then find guys who like large women. If you are small but in a large body at the moment, then get thee to the gym.

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whoa killer... Swinging is very rarely a matter of black and white. There is always gray areas when you are dealing with the most subjective decision there is: Who you choose to have sex with. Now, we are HWP swingers because, by and large, we are attracted to people who value fitness like we do. But that is not to say that you have to be the uber-athlete to swing with us. Likewise, there are people who won't swing with us because we're not blond, too young, too short, ect...

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Scuse me Tommy boy..but no reason to be insulting...sometimes a person is in the large ratio due partly to weight, partly due to the fact they are built large... muscle and bone wise. If I lose 2 sizes I will be a 14 and I will prob still weigh in at about 175 or more. I have a large proprtion of muscle underneath the extra weight and am also heavy boned. I have also seen people say they are HWP and no way are they! So the HWP ads make me laugh because I have seen people who claim it and to me are obese!

 

An

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It kills me when people say "they don't know what they are missing". As if extra weight makes you a better lover.

 

I have in fact had sex with heavy women that had terrific personalities and were more than exceptional in bed, but would never seek them out.

 

I like thin women. I have more fun with them sex wise. I ain't missing a thing.

 

To tell someone to go to a gym or go on a diet is just as annoying. People do not generally choose to be heavy. There are genetic factors, metabolic factors, and some people are just large. They can't help it a bit. The gym I go to is full of them.

 

I happen to be just about bald and in my mid 40's. I don't expect everyone to be attracted to me or feel like they are missing out on anything if they turn me down. Maybe they like long haired young guys. That's great.

 

Everyone is not for everyone. There has to be choice involved. Maybe its age, size, color, personality etc. I don't happen to like ego-maniacs that think they are better at anything than everyone else. Some people like that....to each their own.

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Why are you even asking the question? Figure out who you are. If you are actually large, then find guys who like large women. If you are small but in a large body at the moment, then get thee to the gym.Well Tommy Boy it is easy to see why you are just a visitor to this site. Thanks for your very biased opinion. Didn't your mother ever teach you...if you don't have something nice to say then don't say anything at all?

 

I have to agree with AN and Colocpl. My husband and I definitely do not rate a couple on their HWP. As a matter of fact we refuse to even look at profiles that say "killer looks" "body to die for" and all the other self involved hoopla. It is the person inside that we want to know....that makes the difference for us.

 

But I suppose, just to be fair, if you are looking for a one night stand to thrill yourself...perhaps video or whatever and sell on the internet market..well then keep on being biased.

 

And BTW, my husband and I are both HWP....but we wouldn't even give you (tommyboy), based on your comments a second glance.

 

SC3WAY, hang in there, be patient....not all swingers are biased idiots!

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Hey I'm a fat girl..yeah you heard me a FAT GIRL!! And even I have my preferences when it comes to who I play with. I go to the gym 3-4 days a week silly Tommyboy. It is about sex when you get down to it and there is a certain way you must present yourself on screen to catch people's eye. You can't tell my personality from this computer now can you?? Learn to be seductive and just have fun with it and they will cum..If this fat girl can play, then anyone can!!!

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Being a large lady (I'm 300 lbs) it is very hard to feel sexy when you are being called names just because of your weight. I am not a goddess but I am not ugly and have found a chatroom who accepts me for who I am and not what I look like. I have had many offers for sex from both men and women.

 

I think someone made the remark about being clean. I am one of the cleanest people you will find. I know some small people who could use a good bath now and again and they think they are sexy. Fat doesn't mean unhealthy and it sure doesn't mean not sexy. If you don't like it fine, but why should you make rude comments. Would someone like it if I made fun of their small dick?

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Way back sometime last year, this very issue came up. In fact, my wife, if I remember correctly, was the one who started the thread. Being a larger woman herself, this subject is somewhat personal to her.

 

While it's true that not everyone is meant for everyone else, tact is certainly required when turning someone down, whether over the internet or in person. And one of the worst offenses (but one I've seen too many times in ads) is equating extra weight with being dirty. I'll once again state the analogy I've given in here several times -- if one were to refer to racial minorities using negative and pejorative terms in the same vein as those used on larger people (especially women), there'd be hell to pay. Agreed?

 

Personally, we NEVER respond to any ad that uses words or phrases such as "attractive" or "hot looking" to describe themselves. I doubt they'd be interested in us anyway.

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Yep Dan I think that is the right analogy..I find sometimes that people who are truly beautiful really dont want to hear it. They find that being told that they are is embarassing. A lot of people who think they are God's gift to others usually are mostly artifice and in a few years look like hell from overuse and abuse. I will also say that the most awful things I see are the breast anhancements that are huge....give me natural everyday!

 

I really hate the fact people assume you can turn weight on and off. Sorry to say it doesn't work that way... having kids took my figure and I am fighting to get it back even after all these years.

 

An

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I don't need pity. I have a husband who loves me. I just can't stand people who put other people down. I try to teach my children that the world is made up of many different people. I understand that maybe no one but my hubby will every want me and that is fine if it is true. I have tried diets, they don't work. I am destined to be a fat person and so be it. I'll just have to love myself and take the love of my husband and kids.

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Has it occurred to anybody that our beloved TommyBoy is a troll (someone who posts outrageous comments on forums to to work people into a frensy for his own amusement). It certainly has worked! But as insensitive as his comments are, Maggie, please do not give up on trying to lose weight! We love the fact that you love yourself as you are but remember that you have a family that would like to have you around a long time. Medically, staying at your current weight puts you at considerable risk for heart disease, the number one killer of women, not to mention adult onset diabetes. I had a professor once who said "There is a fine line between content with where you are in life and resignation." Of course, this is hardly the place for a lecture in health.

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We don't understand why y'all wasted time replying to TommyBoy at all. It's guys like him that have caused us to establish a "No Single Men" rule in our playing.

 

We think couples who swing, if they do not put their marriages on the line, at least have some risks involved. Single men risk nothing. Therefore, it seems to us, it's unlikely that they will ever really understand what swinging is all about. Why bother with them? Especially if they are like TommyBoy????

 

Alura

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We don't understand why y'all wasted time replying to TommyBoy at all. It's guys like him that have caused us to establish a "No Single Men" rule in our playing.

 

We think couples who swing, if they do not put their marriages on the line, at least have some risks involved. Single men risk nothing. Therefore, it seems to us, it's unlikely that they will ever really understand what swinging is all about. Why bother with them? Especially if they are like TommyBoy????

 

Alura

 

Hey Alura,

 

I agree totally with your post. My responses were not so much an answer to "tommyboy" posts, but were more an effort to let others know that all people are not so shallow. As I said in a prior post...My dander got the best of me.

:rolleyes:

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Weighing in...

 

I am chubby, no doubt about it. Smaller than some, bigger than others. I am not chubby because of a disease or aliens performing experiments on me. I put on weight becuase I like to eat. Open mouth, Enter Twinkie. No mystery there.

 

Now being bigger I don't think it has endowed me with any mythical sexual powers that would cause some one to "miss out" by choosing not to have sex with me. Don't get me wrong, I think I am pretty damn good, but that's INSPITE of the weight not BECAUSE of the wieght.

 

Attraction counts. Everyone has a preference. I don't think someone should get down on the folks who don't want to be with overweight people. I am bisexual but I prefer thinner women. I am a hypocritc, I know. But who cares? It's sex! If you can't be politically incorrect in bed, where can you be?

 

There's my two cents for ya!

 

Siera

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For what it's worth, I am very sexually attracted to fat, large, plump, etc, women. I enjoy sex with such women more than any other body types because women of size, I find, are very passionate. Women with large bodies are a lot of fun exploring also. I am not a large man myself, 6', 180lbs and neither is my wife.

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A few things from my perspective:

 

1) I guess I had undersood "HWP" a little differently than many who've posted here. I didn't see "HWP" as very exclusionary. Certainly it excludes those who are obese, but I saw it as a catchall phrase that included those whose physiques weren't perfect but were 'in the ballpark.'

 

As I used to tell my ex, all a woman needs is a waist. (Her weight fluctuated and she constantly agonized over it.) To me, that's proportion. Measurements don't mean much as long as you have a waist.

 

2) You can be "overweight" and have a sexually satisfying life. In fact, from the amateur videos I've seen, it seems that "overweight" gals seem to be more often multi-orgasmic than "normal" women.

 

From those vids I made one very important observation: Every women in the throes of orgasm is beautiful.

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As a single female new to this lifestyle, I must admit the definition of HWP has escaped me. Isn't it really totally subjective?

 

I've spent most of my life as a slender size 10. But in the last year,because of an illness my metabolism got all out of whack and we are still trying to get it under control. But I have gone up to a size 14 and that has made me self conscious and shy away from ads that insist on HWP people only. I'm not obese, my doctor is not concerned that my weight is at an unhealthy level or anything like that. But when I see those three little letters, HWP, I cringe.

 

But I'd like to offer something that will perhaps help us keep things in perspective. I wonder, would TommyBoy think that Marilyn Monroe was fat? Would he tell her to "get thee to a gym" or would he to jump her if she had the misfortune to show up on his doorstep? Well good ole Marilyn was one of the greatest sex symbols that ever lived and she didn't wear a size 2. She wore a size 14...imagine that.

 

I'd like to make a suggestion, the next time you see an ad demanding a person that is HWP, say to yourself, "HWP...Hot With Personality...yep that's me!" And go for it!

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My wife and I are healthy and fit. I weight lift and jet ski, and she is tall and naturally lean. We are not "perfect". We have a little pudge in the right spots, but are considered "HWP". This is personal preference. Does a larger person have less sex appeal? No. I know some very attractive "heavier" women that are as sexy as hell. By "heavier" I don't mean fat and morbidly obese.

 

On the reverse side of the coin, we are not attracted to rail-thin, skinny "anorexic" people either. My wife wants to be with another woman, and she just so happens to find "HWP" or athletically built women more sexually attractive. After all, isn't sex about finding someone you're sexually attracted to?? The chemistry should be there, and that is indeed a facilitator. We have nothing against "heavyset" people. We just don't find them sexually appealing to us due to our PERSONAL PREFERENCE. We like knowing if someone is "HWP", and we are glad people put it in their ads. It certainly doesn't mean we are looking for fitness models in our quest. Heck, that would make us look out of shape and make us self-conscious! "HWP" just means that you have a build that is "average". You have a little body fat in the right areas, don't have a "six pack" (maybe a four pack), and stay generally active. We are an active couple, so we want our playmate to keep up with us!

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GypsyWind,

 

That has to be one of the best posts of I've seen on this subject :) The comment on it being subjective is totally true. I think we all look at people and decide if they are HWP to US (and that even goes with your "new" definition of HWP.

 

Some will always look at the weight you list with your ad and automatically assume you are overweight or fat without even looking at a picture or meeting you and that is their problem. But don't let those words stop you before you even reply to an ad. Give it a shot and see what happens.

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Had to chime in with my two cents worth. Tommy Boy is more than welcome to his opinion and to sleep with whatever type of person he wishes to but he has NO BUSINESS insulting people. Fat people have taken the place of minorities as the group it is OK to make fun of. For years the same jokes were made with minorities as the butt of the joke and now they have just plugged fat people into the same degrading jokes.

 

It isn't as simple as Tommy Boy would like to think. I was an athelete up until 9 years ago when I broke my neck in a bike accident. After almost a year of therapy I got the use of both my arms and legs back but I had gained almost a hundred pounds. Not much else to do but eat when all you can do is lay down for 6 months. When you say things like that try of how you will make someone feel.

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Big Dawg,

 

Most people that I know swinger and non do not judge people on their size, looks, religion or race. Perhaps, it is because of who we choose to be friends with. (Swing and Non)

 

Certainly there are some that do, but there are so many out there that do not discriminate on the above factors. For most it is a matter of personality which creates and builds the chemistry and an attraction for friendship or companionship. Unfortunately, some are unable to look beyond the physical aspects of the person and see their inner being. Those are the ones that probably miss having some of the greatest friends or companions in their lives.

 

Lori

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Ok...I'm one of those people that use HWP in my ads. I am little...5'4" 115 lbs although my boyfriend's scale says 110..(I think it's rigged)

 

I agree with hotcpl. Everyone has an idea of what they want ...I have great "friends" that are not HWP...I love them...but I wouldn't have sex with them...I have friends with great personalities....but I wouldn't have sex with them. I think I am too thin except in certain areas where I need to burn off an inch or two of fat...Not by dieting but by doing the dreaded exercise. And to a lot of people I would not fit into their idea of a great sex partner...But that's ok with me...My guy loves me thin...I have been overweight...went up to 150 lbs with my second child. It was hell losing it because I love to eat...You choose what you eat and you choose if you want to exercise...I choose not to eat too many of the wrong things because I choose not to exercise. The people in the ads may have a killer body, but an ugly face...Well,they have to look good to me too...Who cares about the body if I don't want to look at their face...I also use the word attractive in describing us...why? Because I want to find attractive people. But that doesn't guarantee any more responses from the beautiful people...And just because I consider us attractive does not mean that you will. I know what I'm attracted too and that's what I look for.

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Coolwetbreeze,

 

Very well said. Everyone does have an idea of their "ideal" mate or partner. The only thing I disagree with tho is that some people due to a medical condition do not have the option of dieting or exercise to control weight. I have a cousin who was the picture of health, beautiful, vibrant and quite frankly very sexy looking. She developed a thyroid condition that caused her to put on a lot of weight. It didn't change her inner personality, but it did change her looks.

 

Had I have only been looking for a certain type of person (physical wise) I would never have considered my husband. I always had the sexual "hots" for macho men types. Ya know the big men, physically fit, muscles bulging from everywhere sort of type. My husband and I had crossed paths for several years due to his business that does private contract work. I had no desire for him physically whatsoever (not that he is unappealing to the eye, just wasn't my type). Our communication with each other was basically business involved. Then one day out of the blue he asked if I cared to join him for breakfast that morning (I was working a 3rd shift at the time, he was there to get his workers started) and it still sends shivers down my spine when I think about it. (borrowing that from TNT I think). Now it is nine years later since our first "date". We have probably known each other for fifteen years.

 

I suppose what I am trying to say here is that sometimes you have to look inside the package to determine what the contents are. I wouldn't trade my husband in for a million bucks, but had I not been able to overlook my personal preferences, I wouldn't have the relationship that I have today.

 

Lori

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The comment on it being subjective is totally true. I think we all look at people and decide if they are HWP to US (and that even goes with your "new" definition of HWP.

 

Some will always look at the weight you list with your ad and automatically assume you are overweight or fat without even looking at a picture or meeting you and that is their problem. But don't let those words stop you before you even reply to an ad. Give it a shot and see what happens.

 

I agree here with the HWP and weight in ads. Hubby and I do shoot models as a sideline to out biz to help them build portfolios. We had a discussion on another BB about weight and such and we checked out the charts.Well the funny thing is when I compare my measurements at 21 to the girls and find the ones who are the same they are invariably a size2-4 whereas I was a size 9 and according to every weight height chart I compared to I was always about 25 lbs over the "ideal weight" for my frame size. So even there weight does not tell what size you are. There are "ideals" and then there is reality. Not every person fits in the average region and the problem is that if you don't people just don't get it! Now I am comfortable with my size but no one we meet is...they see my pic then meet us and we never hear from them but I am very upfront about my size! Yegads! So some people don't listen to you either! I get tired of people who like my face but not my body! Well sorry to say they are inseparable!

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This is a subject that hits home for me. I have been called fat most of my life. Even when I wasn't. I went through high school thinking I was huge. I weighed 183lbs and was 5'9-10 with a 38C chest. I was gorgeous, only do I see that now as I look back. I'm at 198lbs, 48D chest now. People still see me as fat. I'm not exactly "fit" but I do work out and eat healthy.

 

People look at what is on tv and think that its real life. I guess they are so narrow-minded because of the way they were raised or because of fear...or maybe because they are just plain rude.

 

My husband likes bigger women, and so do I. They look more real. :)

 

:mad: SOME PEOPLE WILL NEVER LOOK LIKE BARBIE!! :mad:

 

Personally we never reply to ads that say "hot couple" or "HWP". I stay away from them like the plague. We usually don't reply to ads if they are under 150lbs either. We want people who are more like us. :rolleyes:

 

Either way. I'm comfortable with who I am. If someone else isn't, oh well. There are more people out there. I don't need their hangups. I have plenty of my own to deal with.

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I agree all fit people are not assholes, I am 42 years old walk 4 miles per day and have lost over 40 lbs in the last 4 months. and would like to loose another 20 lbs, not for society but for myself to feel better and so i can live longer for my family. Do I find HWP unsexy? NO, but we do screen them because of size. Size can be intimidating. If you are going to have sex safety is a issue. and you must feel comfortable and when swinging on average do you know people that well? We are new at this and still looking for a couple that is looking for what we are out of this life style. And we both wonder if there is such a couple?

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I am 5 ft 5. and have measurements of 42F/33/42. I am constantly approached by body conscious men because they find me attractive despite not being a size 3. Hey boys, if you want big breasts, and you want them real, you will not find it in a skinny chick. Not to mention, I am fit. I work out at the gym on the elliptical for 45 min, 4 days a week, followed by running on the treadmill for 20 min and doing weights. We were with a couple recently where the man definitely wants fit women; guess what? He absolutely adores me and finds me very beautiful. Guess he doesn't notice the fat. He is crazy about my face, eyes, natural redhair and breasts lol. Not to mention my heart.

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My fiance were just having a convo about this subject last night, he asked what I plan on wearing to the club and I said anything that doesn't make me look bad. His response was that the only thing that makes me look bad are the clothes that I am uncomfortable in. You see I am not fat by any means but I am not thin either. I am very well toned but have a bubble butt and large natural breasts. I have an hourglass figure. 50 years ago I would've been a pin up girl, but now our priorities have changed. No longer are women valued for looking feminine but for looking a-sexual. I personally prefer women to look like women and so do most the people I know. So if you are happy with yourself good for you, if not then you can work on it. As far as the insulting goes its fine to have an opinion, but by no means do you have a right to direct anything hateful towards anybody. Esp. if you are not perfect yourself...

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I am 5 ft 5. and have measurements of 42F/33/42.

 

Are you kidding me?? With those measurements, that's a knockout body which is, pardon my being forward, perfectly built for sex. Who the hell would consider you overweight?

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I can't speak for other men, but I know THIS man has little physical attraction for women who have bodies like 12 year old boys. I wouldn't preclude swinging with such women if the chemistry is right, but for God's sake I like some curvature on women too. Being long time nudists, we've seen countless nude women, every size and shape you can possibly imagine, and I've always found the more full-bodied women very attractive to me, and they also seem more sensual and self confident in their sexuality than many of their thinner counterparts.

 

Perhaps they know something some of the rest of us don't?

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My .02. This whole lifestyle is about personal preference. It's no different then our whole lives. I choose to drive a mini van because it's convenient. It's my preference. I choose to work out and eat healthy because it is good for me and my family. I want to be here to see my children grow and have families that I can spoil. I's my preference to go to the gym and avoid junk food. I actually prefer women with a cpl extra pounds. If they are pretty, have a nice personality and find me desiable, that works for me! The couple extra pounds thing opens up a can of worms I know. My wife is 5'2 and goes between 135 and 140. She's not skinny, but she is sexy as all get out. She has legs and a bum to die for with a real 36D chest and a gorgeous face too. She's certainly not sloppy and carries her weight pretty well and dresses to accentuate and eliminate. When we go to swing parties she never fails to attract the attention of guys and ladies. It's my preference! I had a good idea of what her body would look like when we got married. (23 years next month!) She is constantly battling to keep her weight in check, but I think she does a great job at it. We all need to ignore the assinine comments made by those that think they are "holier than thou".

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Right on FTnPV, it is personel choice and I might add I'm more interested there personallities and politness then, I'm looking for a certain size. And that is hard enough for us right now.

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Maybe some people are shor-tminded enough not to see beyond your looks, but the majority of people arrange to meet people before anything happens just to make sure they actually like them no???

 

yes you can have a 36-26-36 figure but if your attitude sucks then most people wont want to know.

Or be a male model 6pack and everything and have a 3 inch dick!!!

 

I Personally like to actually get to know someone before I do anything at all. looks do help but in the end almost anything can be hidden or just ignored. Have you not heard of dressing up???

 

I admit yes I am overweight but not by choice and I am not that happy with my own figure but if you ask my man he wouldn't swap me for anyone.

 

Remember this, BBW shade in the summer and we heat in the winter... and most of all we make better lovers!

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I'm sure a lot of BBW's hear a lot of insensitive remarks. I've seen a number of them posted here.

 

The question is always, "Why are people so shallow that they won't spend the time to get to know someone who is overweight?" I don't know the answer to that, but it's been my experience that women in general, and particularly BBW's are just as dismissive when given the opportunity to meet a short man. Even Quin, whom I consider to be one of the posters on this board who gives some of the better-thought-out responses, once fell into this trap. In describing Saul of Taursus, who had a myriad of traits "not attractive to women," "short" was one of those traits she listed. (Sorry, Quin, I still think you're super-cool!)

 

Even if a man is well-educated, reasonably suave, well-dressed, broad fairly muscular shoulders, trim waist and buns, and facially attractive, with no spinich between his front teeth, he has a long uphill struggle with the ladies if he's under 5'6" tall. There are a few ladies who don't think that way and, believe me, they are worth the wait.

 

Mr. Alura

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Wow... who would have thought this thread had legs? Quin your post resonate with us, particularly since one of us works in the fitness industry. As we have posted before, we understand where the bitterness comes from- society puts such a stigma of being over weight especially when it comes to our conception of beauty.

 

What we don't understand is the double standard being applied. Specifically, why it is wrong to choose partners by physical attributes and then claim that people with certain physical attributes are better lovers? If you are an overweight individual participating in this lifestyle that some people will not want to swing with you because that is their preference- just like they may not want to swing with people who are too tall or too small, big breasted or not, too well endowed or not, are nice or are mean, ect. In the end "personality" is about the most subjective of all measures since one person's idea of loveable is another's idea of annoying.

 

While we generally avoid the need to justify our attraction to fit people, for the purpose of this thread we'll do it. To us fitness implies a common interest in how we look and feel. Furthermore, it demonstrates a common displine and physicall awareness that comes with persuit of a health lifestyle. That being said, we're not perfect by any means and how people "click" with us goes a long way. Ultimately it is attraction that leads us to play or not- something that is as unique to us.

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5'7" is short? Well, that would depend on how tall you yourself are :) I'm 4' 11 1/2" myself, so 5'7" is tall to me :D .

 

I'm sure that my height is a turn off for some, a turn on for others.

 

If you are happy with who you are, what does it matter what others think of you?

 

Everyone has certain things that turn them off or on and no one should be made to feel bad if they are not turned on by a certain body type and in return, they should not be made to feel bad if their body type is not what turns someone else on.

 

Just be happy with who you are.

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Both men and women carry weight differently. I have a 5'5" frame (not tall by any standard) but if I weigh any less than 140 pounds I look anorexic. The good Lord chose to give me long athletic legs and skipped the waist department. I wear a size 14(tall...just in case anyone runs into a good sale...hehe) and feel very good about it. After my first born I lost weight and wore a size 3. I maybe weighed in at around 100 pounds, if I were wearing some bell bottomed, rain soaked Levi's. When I look back at those pictures I wonder how I ever survived and sex at that time exhausted me. I don't feel that weight has a bearing on your sexuality or attractiveness. It has more to do with the person inside the body.

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I find it so unnecessary to remind people that fat people are less attractive. Like people don't know that "thin is in". A persons attracted to another for many reasons. Roughly 20 percent of the U.S. population is considered obese by some major study I read. Millions of these people are involved in happy relationsips. So many people have married the nicest thing they could find to hang from there arm and end up with a lifetime of pure hell because they didn't look beyond the hunk or fox factor.

 

Im no model type but I have never had a problem attracting nice females. Several of my friends are obese and have lots of love and sex.

 

I guess my point is that anyone with an ounce of reality knows that overweight people are not considered for miss america pagaents, and overweight males arent gonna usually end up with miss america.

 

Two of my best friends involve a lady that is probably one of Gods most seductive, sensous, pleasant persons ever created. She is married to a real man. He has had his face basically burned off though. I have never seen a couple more in love. Now, I give both of them a lot of credit. Neither one let the disfiguration from preventing what turned out to be a marriage made in heaven.

 

I give credit to anyone that loses weight though and I happened to have lost 40 lbs myself in the last 18 months. I feel better and know that I am a bit more noticed by women in my age group.

 

Would I have sex with a profoundly obese woman? Probably not, but I would feel no need to come up with a profound statement along the lines that implies that fat people are less attractive. Maybe I'm sensitive but I think saying things like that is unnecessary and a little mean. John.

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I do believe that many people just don't know how to excercise and eat right according to their mental/physical type. In other words, they are on the wrong weight loss plan and that's why a lot of people don't lose weight.

 

I'm 5'5" in height. Weigh 115 Lbs., and I'm 36C-26-36. I excercise regularly and I'm a strict vegetarian (vegan). I've been told many times that I'm very hot-looking, and people are always asking me why I have sex with "ugly, fat, and old people". My biggest turn-on is personality/attitude. I don't care what a person looks like. I've had sex with "unattractive" people with fantastic personalities, and absolutely gorgeous people with OK personalities. And I have much more fun with the former....Nobody's perfect.

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we were approached (instant message) by a nearby couple. out of habit, i instantly go to the profile, to get the gist of things. there were no pictures, but the rough measurements were just about "barbie and ken."

 

"well," i think to myself, "looks like they did the math on their own." by that i mean look at our profile, and work out if we are HWP or not. just to make sure (and i do this out of habit too), i had them read our profile again, just so there were no misunderstandings.

 

the male assumed that Red was HWP and had a big chest...which is exactly opposite of the truth. she has a small chest and a juicy booty. once i explained this to him, he left and we haven't heard a word from either of them.

 

in retrospect, i think maybe he tried to give us the benefit of the doubt. then again, maybe he was a moron that couldn't do math...i have since modified our profile with the words "slightly overweight" and "we are not Barbie and Ken, they live down the street at Toys R' Us."

 

Truth in advertising.

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I actually haven't read this thread since it came back to life a month or so ago so I finally decided to skim through it. A couple of things caught my eye and reminded me of other things.

 

In regards to being overweight/obese. The standards that is measured on is a comparison of your weight to your height, and does not take into consideration muscle (which weighs more than fat). So there is really no way to judge what a person might look like based on their height and weight with that in mind. Based on that standard Arnold Schwartzenager (sp?) is obese.

 

So given that what do we base our % of the population that is overweight or obese on?

 

In regards to the short guy thing, I'm fairly short myself so a guy would have to be REALLY short to be shorter than me and unless he by more than a couple of inches I don't think I would base any interest in him on that. Reading the posts on short guys tho reminded me of an episode of Sex in the City where Samantha was at a bar and got hit on by this guy sitting next to her. He was nicely dressed, good looking and witty so she agreed to have dinner with him. After she agreed he hopped off his stool and revealed that he was may 5 feet tall (the stool was taller than he was). She went out with him initially because she felt like she had to cuz she had said yes. Then tried to dump him later at a "used boyfriends party". He basically told her "give me one night", so she did (it was Samantha after all and he was offering sex). The story went that he more than made up for his height in other areas... and was one of her longer relationships.

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It has been said many times in this post personal prefence is the key. We all have been implanted at a very young age what type of person you think is attractive rather it be thin, chubby, blonde burnette, strong, smart. But it is amazing to me how many women have fallen into the attractive column to me that don't fit into my normal sterotype. And the reason for that is chemistry personality. My suggestion is don't always let the stats of a person sway you unless you meet that person in person you will never know!

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I have to agree, that's why we decided to start our own Off-premise club, we really enjoy meeting new people. The low pressure of the club socials is a great place to do just that, meet people get to know them a little. As a matter of fact we had met a couple for lunch one day last summer, things really didn't go well (not bad just not well). We decided that we weren't going to pursue a sexual relationship with them. Then we met them at a party/social and things were completely different. We got to know them in a different atmosphere, and now we are planning on getting together as soon as our schedules permit.

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If you are happy that is great. Everyone has a different "taste" in someone the want to have sex with. I might want to have sex with the tall blonde with big tits and round ass. I still go home with and love very much Kat who is 5'5" 125#'s dark brown hair and a hand full of tit to nibble on. Unlike women ...Men have a visual thing going on and if the visual is not there the hard dick is not going to be either. Could lead to a :mad: moment

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This is my first post. So anyway, here is my two cents worth, which is worth just about nothing nowadays.

 

Certainly, everyone is entitled to their own opinions. The many differences of opinions is one of the things that make this world so interesting.

 

Fat, skinny, muscular, athletic, pleasantly plump, thin...you name it. Seems like there is always someone who likes one more than the other. My wife and I are just average....not fat...and not really what you would call skinny. We are not perfect by any means. As a matter of fact, I can't recall anyone that I believe has looked "perfect" during my lifetime. I do know that "fat" people can still be very sexy, and can be very attractive. To each his own is basically what I feel. Maybe I personally don't find a fat person sexy, but maybe my best friend does. I learned a long time ago that you can't please everyone all the time, so why bother. As long as a person is happy with themselves, not much else really matters.

 

My wife and I are just in the initial stages of exploring the realm of swingers. So I apologize if it sounds like I don't know what I am talking about....I probably don't. But I do hope that we learn a lot from reading the posts here, and certainly the variety of opinions...regardless of whether or not we agree with them. I hope this was not too long.

 

By the way...hi to everyone.

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