Julie and Randie

So John, is what you are saying...don't bullshit?? I have a few suggestions to add: Treat the couples with respect...especially the women! Remember that YOU are the outsider! Perhaps the husband fantasizes about his wife with another man...but she is still his wife! Also, do not EVER even hint that you want to meet her alone. We find this kind of behavior quite an insult. Single males are quite frankly a dime a dozen...so you need to find something that will make you stand out. A sense of humor, honesty, and sensitivity will get you everywhere. I highly recommend having, for lack of a better word, references. If you have met a few couples, and it has gone well, ask them if they might give you a "recommendation" to others...

We definitely have a horror story..although what we learned from it I'm still not sure. Hubby and I met a man (we'll refer to him as "Larry") in a chat room. Larry told us that he had a girlfriend who was interested in swinging. We chatted back and forth for a few weeks. We only had one phone call from them, the only time we ever spoke to "her". Finally, we set a tentative date. We told Larry that we would let him know when we found a babysitter for that night. All week, he sent messages...sometimes 10 a day before we would answer, demanding to know if we had a babysitter yet...and if we didn't answer within a few minutes he would continue to message, saying things like, "Oh well, I had a feeling you two weren't for real", or "Are you going to answer me?"...we lead busy lives, and would try to explain that whenever we would get back on to chat...but he was never satisfied with that. Finally, hubby and I grew tired of his constant demands and temper. We tried as gently as possible to explain that we no longer were interested, that we didn't think that we would suit very well... Well he didn't like that one bit....he grew angry and started making threats about giving our phone number out to everyone on the net...and saying that he would turn us in to social services - allegedly for "swinging with kids in the house"...which of course was preposterous. We had never had an experience, much less with our kids in the house. I tried as politely a possible to explain to him that it was his personality that was turning us off...but he wouldn't hear it. He had it in his head by then that we were playing games with him. A few days later, we started talking to a new couple...and after another few weeks of chatting with them, agreed upon a meeting place and time - near where they lived, which was an hour drive for us. We arrived that night, nervous but eager. They never showed. We learned later that they were friends of Larry's...it was a set up, just to "get back" at us. I guess we did learn not to give out our home phone number after that....but it was a very irritating ordeal. Thank goodness we have since met people who are not as sick and twisted. Larry still messages us from time to time. I wish we could just wash our hands of him once and for all.

I only wish that hubby and I could be more like you! Neither of us really like sex during "that time of the month"...It's messy, feels weird...(too sticky)..and pretty much turns us both off. Okay, OCCASIONALLY we have sex in the shower during my period, but not very often. Of course, I am one of those lucky girls who only has 3 day periods, too. Perhaps if it were a week long or so, we would learn to like it. For us, those thre days of abstinence leads to a regular sex fest once my period is over. I'm interested to see what others think about this.