SwingVan69

Thank you for this great post. I was feeling like a freak that the hand holding/PDA thing bothered me so much. I LOVE to flirt but can do it with a slight touch, words and looks. I feel like the handholding/PDA thing borders on Poly. I'm here for the sex, not for another man to "date" me. To me the flirting that people around us can't hear or outwardly see is WAY more exciting. It's like a dirty little secret that we can make hotter with flirting secretly in public and in private it can be very hot.

Thank you for your response! I've been looking all morning to find a couples counselor but no one really focus's on the lifestyle in our area. Just looking to find someone to help both of us communicate a little better. I appreciate everyone's feedback so much

We stopped doing the websites together because I couldn’t keep up. We are on 5 websites and get numerous messages daily. Some nights I’m tired or just want to chill so I don’t want to go over all the people and make decisions so I let him “vet” people first. I’m going to make an effort to get us off so many websites. Thank you so much for your response!

Thank you so much PaDoc!!! I smiled reading your reply knowing I’m not alone and that 15 years later you are going strong ? Thank you for that!

Thank you for your response! Taking too much time off has led to pouting. ?. He says he just wants to go out and be social and it has nothing to do with sex. Which I believe however is it strange I just want some time to hang with the kids and do nothing?

Not even sure where to start my post. My husband and I have been in the lifestyle for over a year now. While we've had some hot times, it has been hotter for my husband. He loves EVERY aspect of the lifestyle. The partying, the going out every weekend, the flirting, the texting, the KIKing, the touching, the sex...all of it. It's not that I don't like it, it's that I don't like all of it all the time. We still have two teenagers at home and I'm still a Mom. So sometime's I don't want to feel like I HAVE to Kik someone or have to be sexy...sometimes I want to be a normal family. I love the sexual aspect of the lifestyle. Sometimes the idea of certain situations turns out to be hotter than the situation but it's still fun. What I'm not a fan of: How some of it makes me feel. I don't like watching him be sensual and loving to another woman. I can watch him fuck one, but not the hand touching, sensual kisses, etc. He says the flirting is the hottest part and maybe I just shouldn't be in the lifestyle since I don't like it. Again, I like it....certain times and places. I was a bigger flirt than him before the lifestyle! My husband is ALL in. We are on multiple websites, have over 15 KIK conversations/groups and we go out a minimum of once a weekend (he'd prefer twice). I get overwhelmed and we "slow down" but it's always a very short time and I feel very guilty about it. He checks the websites, Kik, texts habitually. My husband is much less picky about the people we play with. Since he does the majority of the websites he tells me all the time how often he turns people away because he knows I won't be interested. So out of the couples we talk to and sometimes play with there are really only a handful that I'm really into. I just don't feel like always being the wet blanket and saying no. Our KIK conversations would be much much smaller if we only went off my wants and I feel very guilty about that so I says yes to people that are good not great. I guess I need a point or a question to my post. So here are a few, honestly I just want feedback from others in the Lifestyle. Needing to feel "normal" 1.) If I'm having these feelings am I just not "cut out" for the lifestyle? 2.) How much time does the Lifestyle consume of your everyday life? 3.) How often do you tell your partner no when it comes to other couples? I appreciate any and all feedback.