Shore2Please

Making me think. I watched the act not the people. I watched the women doing the same thing in different ways. I watched men reacting also in different ways.

It is hard to explain my emotional feelings or the reasons I have them. I never prepared myself to have sex outside our marriage until it happened. Our original swap was private, I didn’t watch him, he didn’t watch me, I quickly removed all thoughts of infidelity until the next morning. My original guilt was thinking how much I enjoyed that first night, a feeling we discussed and was reassured that we did nothing wrong. We don’t swing or swap often, the majority of our extra relationships have been one to one, we have our favorite friends far enough away that we are not together often. The guilt I felt last week was me thinking I had sex with more different people in one week than I had in my entire life before that. I had sex with strangers I just met, I didn’t even have a connection with. I know nothing about them as I am sure they know nothing about me. Possibly the guilt was enjoying too much.

After a week at a house vacation with a large group it’s not only men who watch. I’m not a voyeur normally, I don’t need to watch anyone including my husband have sex but one night we cheered on two women with the men giving oral. I left my shy self behind and laughed and enjoyed with the crowd.

I liked that we stayed in the USA even if Arizona has some crazy laws that are so backwards. A beach vacation is our preference but Arizona is gorgeous too and we got to do some exploring. I will say we were pretty isolated that made me feel safe from peeping eyes and then nervous because we didn’t know everyone there. It ended up a perfect vacation with a little guilt on my mind.

We are on our way to an Arizona party for a real first time hedonistic experience for us. I don’t know what to expect or even how many people will be there. We only know two couples, one is our first and primary swap friends who were invited by people we don’t know. I am not an exhibitionist nor a voyeur making me question why we agreed to something outside our comfort zone. We agreed to an open mind. I know I can always say no, my husband thinks I will attract everyone. I pray others have limits. We did plenty of prep before going.

He would be happy to call you to discuss our sexual life. Neither of us are up for sainthood yet, we aren’t ready for beatification. My feeling is men are excited much easier by visuals, my husband is aroused equally. He isn’t leaving the room if I’m with another woman or if there’s an opportunity for group sex. Do you find most gangbangs, the original post, are more for the men, the women there for the entertainment? I can understand a woman with two men, I have participated, I don’t fully understand wanting a gang.

I chuckle reading that I am married to a great man, I am but not for the reason you give. I give him equal freedom to enjoy the way I do. When visiting our friends he spends the night alone with the wife with all the freedom they want. Unlike many swingers I don’t find great pleasure watching or being watched. We don’t compete for attention or have a need to put on a show. Over the years since meeting our friends I know I have grown in knowing we aren’t cheating or me worrying how he is enjoying other women. Our excitement comes from only seeing these friends a few times a year keeping the anticipation fresh.

The most fortunate part is we enjoy the things we do. Sexually foreplay, cuddling and being next to him is the best part. Multiple times is just not relevant, quality over quantity. I am satisfied when we get time together without being rushed. We aren’t 20 and our bodies have changed , they continue to change along with our sexual needs. His refraction, my lubrication and our frequency has changed. We don’t play with others often by any standard. We have one couple, I call the husband my vacation husband. Maybe because he is like my husband, unrushed, caring , fun, smart with fabulous human qualities is the reason I give him the best I can. The very first time I was with him he kept going even after ejaculating, he kept checking on my pleasures. I cherish that first time and continue to cherish the times we meet.

Pretty sure he did as did the second bf. Fortunately both my husband and our primary friend are able to have multiple ejaculations during a night. Lucky for me he doesn’t want multi every night and I’m grateful for lubes. Give me one great lover over a lineup any day.

Reading all the posts makes me go Ouch My first Gangbang was being with two guys on the same night feeling trampy and sore. I had a date in HS that ended up in his bed while his parents were out for the night. I think we did it three times before I went home. Around midnight my beeper beeped from another guy I dated. No texts back then I had to call him on my bedroom phone. I made up a story to my mother about going to my good friend’s house ending up at the boy’s house. I didn’t even shower from the first guy and the second had no clue what I did before him. I can’t even think what being with a dozen partners would do to me or even think about DNA being left. Give me one great lover for a night and I am happy.

I find gay men are very outgoing and sociable yet never was approached sexually.

We had our first swap on an innocent cruise after going to a nude beach with other couples we met on the cruise. I had no intention to do anything more, no sex was discussed, no swinging, no swapping, the nudity was only because we figured we would never see these people again. I still blame liquor, I wasn’t drunk, that allowed me to agree to sleep with another man.

We enjoy separate rooms for a number of reasons including the freedom of being myself. I was extremely jealous and never wanted to watch my husband, happier to just know he was having fun. It took time to be able to watch and be watched, he knows of my jealous streak which has lessened not disappeared.

Getting pregnant was a genuine concern immediately after our first swap. I knew I was protected, I also know no protection is foolproof. I know that pregnancy with the form we used has led to heartbreak with friends of ours who are not in any outside relationships. Our situation was we kept the option of future children open preventing anything permanent. That first night my main concern was more disease, less pregnancy. When I asked my husband about his night and contraception he was only able to say he guessed she took precautions. We had the most intimate nights and never thought to discuss a prime concern. We had the talk way later along with the what if. Made us think way more. Years later, I still am protected though my husband had a vasectomy, my fear of others and what ifs. What does bother me is I am never asked about contraception, men just expect the woman to deal with it. As I stated, we have discussed and we agree what actions we need to do if something crazy goes wrong.

This isn’t an answer some want to hear, we enjoy being alone in separate rooms. Nobody gets jealous, nobody has to hold back, everyone is free to be themselves. My swing partner lover does things my true lover husband doesn’t do which makes swapping so much fun. I don’t want every sex partner to do the same thing. I also don’t hide what I do with others to the man I’m with for life.