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Are any among us holding hall passes that are seldom or never actually used?

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"Hall pass" has arisen in a few recent threads. A few questions comes into my mind.

 

- Have any married or in-committed-relationship members of this bulletin board been given a hall pass but for some reason or another never have used it? If so, for what reason?

 

- Are any of us holding a hall pass but have maybe only once or twice used it?

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Yes, we prefer to play together.

 

I've used a hall pass once (and it was great). I'd do it again with someone we both know and trust.

 

My husband has twice, with a couple we knew well.

 

Basically, it's just not an opportunity that comes up often for us, but it's a possibility.

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Mr. Doe has had a hall pass pretty much since we met, but he's never used it. At first, he didn't want to dilute our sexual energy so he fended off all invitations and now I think he just prefers that we play together. Plus, it would get in the way of his gaming. ;)

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Mrs D had a hall pass... She used it and I didn't like it. I have a hall pass, but have not used it. I don't think I can given how I feel about her using it. Actually she has been bugging me to use it, but I'm just not there yet.

 

 

Also should add though...I haven't had to work to hard at "fending off the invitations"....

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In eight years, I think she's used it twice and I've used it once. No regrets for any of the occurrences. Opportunities arose, the other one said "go for it", fun was had, and that was the end of it.

 

It's one of those weird things for me. If I didn't have a hall pass, I would probably want it. Since I have one, the feeling about it is "meh".

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I used to have a hall pass but no longer have it. I still extend a hall pass for Mr. Sunbuckus as long as he tells me who and when but hasn't had the opportunity to use it recently due to the above of not really "fending off invitations."

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We each have a standing hall pass when I am on business travel. I have yet to use mine and he has yet to use his...lack of opportunity being the key reason. I suppose I could find someone to hook up with, but would prefer it to be a chance meeting wherever I am staying at perhaps the hotel bar or something of the like.

 

I did send him along to meet with a single lady once that was a no-show. I think he felt bad about having went afterwards. That's the only time he's put his to use.

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Mr. Sweet's hall pass would require an archaeological dig to examine. He knows it's there, but chooses not to avail himself. When he's on travel, he's usually too busy or too tired to meet someone new, and he won't dip his quill in the company ink. When he's home, he doesn't see the point, and generally prefers to play together anyway.

 

Mine, on the other hand, has a few punches in it--but I haven't earned a free meal yet.

 

=)

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We both have hall passes, but they haven't been used for a loooong time. Time, opportunity, candidates all lacking.

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We have hall passes and would like to use them more. Unfortunately, its hard to have the opportunity. We have both used them twice in the past year.

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It's one of those weird things for me. If I didn't have a hall pass, I would probably want it.

Yea, me too.

 

A greater number of members have reported than I had expected. Now I feel not so alone.

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It's one of those weird things for me. If I didn't have a hall pass, I would probably want it. Since I have one, the feeling about it is "meh".

 

Agreed.

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I have one. I used it once, and while the girl was beautiful and the sex was nice, I couldn't stop thinking about my wife the entire time. I missed her.

 

I don't think I'll ever use it again. It's not for me.

 

What I want is to have couples sex , 3 ways or 4 ways, etc. I want my wife involved somehow, even of she's just watching.

 

Going out alone without her sucks.

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We both have hall passes he has had the chance to use it a couple of times and has used it .I used my hall pass once a long time ago.We enjoy playing together more than playing seperate.

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We both have them. She has used it once, but decided it was far more fun together. When I am traveling she has the kids alone, and that is a handful leaving little time or energy.

 

I travel for work but have had few opportunities. When I am working I don't have much time. When I am finished I am headed home to the family as quickly as possible. I have been to a couple of swinger events, but as a a single male, and we know how that goes. I have had a few opportunities with random bar meetings, but so far the women have all been married and cheating, so I passed, much to their dismay. I guess they figure something is wrong with me since I wont cheat with them. One woman even went off on me cursing me out thinking I was a PI sent to spy on her by her husband. I would have loved to have been a fly on the wall when she got home and confronted him, only to find out he had not sent me.

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Guest freeflyer200

It looks like I will return to traveling for work and only home every two weeks. I plan on getting some on the road. I had hoped to get a hall pass and eventually I think I will. I want to be honest and open about it buy I might not be able to. Honestly, I hate to travel and I don't really want to be away from the wifey as we have a good marriage but she is chronically ill and I am running on a sex deficit already and honestly, I want to have more partners and have some fun. I am feeling the clock running out it's time and this will be my last time to do the things I have always wanted to do.

My wife is a pretty brassy broad and I am sure she will give her consent. I really want her to know I am doing other women. This is a big turn on for me that she would agree to it and then I want to return home for really hot sex. We shall see.

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Both of us have hall passes. There is nothing hotter then when she comes home and says feel my pussy I've just been fucked. I then immediately get hard and take her to the bedroom where I enjoy the cream pie.

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My wife has a hall pass that she may use at any time with respect to one person, who is completely unavailable and never likely to be available. She is really into him, and would love to get in bed with him. For anything else, neither of us have hall passes; anything else, and we are in the know before it happens.

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Guest freeflyer200

I approached my wife and asked for a hall pass but she reacted badly. No three way's either. So, I have decided to find a lover. Not just a FWB. My alienation from my wife is now bad enough that I now want a lover and not just a sex partner. The deal was, I thought I could talk about anything with my wife and it turns out I cannot. I told her I would not push her into this but her reaction was so bad that it that I quit caring about being overly concerned with her feelings. I told her I would not go through with it but it turns out I am lying.

I am proud of myself for having the balls to ask her while sober and not just while having sex while we're both turned on, to be able to have sex with other women. I usually pussied out quickly before.

I have gotten her back to the point that our bond of never divorcing "No matter what" remains. So, the implication is I will just be getting it without her blessing, we won't be talking about it or being open about it now. But she "knows" I'm going to stop being faithful. Now, to be clear, this is all not spoken but remains a kind of wink and nod without really being openly acknowledged. I know this is pretty nebulous territory in mind reading but it's what I think is happening between us now.

Had she agreed to the hall pass, three way, I think I would be sitting here telling you how much more in love with her I was. I really do. I really thought we had the kind of love that was like that but that we just never tested it out. Well, it turns out we don't.

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@freeflyer, You're gambling a lot on the two thin reeds of no divorce ever and thinking you have tacit approval. Plus, you're angry and possibly feeling betrayed. Do you really believe this will end well?

 

Any chance the two of you could see a sex positive marriage counselor, before you do something irrevocable? If not, I'd encourage you to share your feelings with your wife and keep doing so until you find safe ground.

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Yes, yes and yes!!

 

I'm glad I found this thread, I was going to post a new one about this.

 

Wife is pregnant and WE are taking a break. She has told me I can have a hall pass but I need to tell her details after.

I have not taken it once.

 

Also I have friends that have single females, smoking hot, who want to play with me and I get text messages with pics every weekend of what I am missing and who is asking about me. YET I really don't feel the NEED to go. I feel like a total pussy to be honest... it kind of bothers me.

 

I will take one soon but I can't explain the lack of excitement I have for playing alone. I guess I am a team player/ team leader. And when I am a one man team I lose interest. Very strange and I have been internalizing this for almost a month....

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Guest freeflyer200

you could be right! No, I am more prepared for a less rosy landing but I will try to be careful. I am feeling my way along day to day.

@freeflyer, You're gambling a lot on the two thin reeds of no divorce ever and thinking you have tacit approval. Plus, you're angry and possibly feeling betrayed. Do you really believe this will end well?

 

Any chance the two of you could see a sex positive marriage counselor, before you do something irrevocable? If not, I'd encourage you to share your feelings with your wife and keep doing so until you find safe ground.

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Guest freeflyer200

I guess I was so shocked at her reaction that I have been throw off pretty badly. I am working hard to do the sane thing yet I am determined to restore zest to my sex life. I sacrificed my enjoyment for a long long time due to her health issues and I don't want to do it any more. I have little hope on the communication angle but I guess I will see what happens. I probably am in too big a hurry.

@freeflyer, You're gambling a lot on the two thin reeds of no divorce ever and thinking you have tacit approval. Plus, you're angry and possibly feeling betrayed. Do you really believe this will end well?

 

Any chance the two of you could see a sex positive marriage counselor, before you do something irrevocable? If not, I'd encourage you to share your feelings with your wife and keep doing so until you find safe ground.

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So, I have decided to find a lover. Not just a FWB.

 

But she "knows" I'm going to stop being faithful. Now, to be clear, this is all not spoken but remains a kind of wink and nod without really being openly acknowledged.

 

I can sort of see a hall pass arrangement where there is just tacit approval granted while having avoided fully participating in the discussions leading up to that change in your relationship, although I do think it is extremely dangerous ground to be walking.

 

But, what is not clear to me is whether or not she knows you are looking for more than just a sex partner, but instead a lover. Huge difference there.

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Guest freeflyer200

Originally I was only looking for a sex partner. Thats still my preference. I guess I am just angry right now but part of the juice of our relationship was this understanding that there could be some freedom. Fortunately, for most of our marriage, our sex was really good and apparently neither of us needed to get anything outside. Seeing that we have moved in opposite directions sexually has me thinking about a lover. I know that is pure dynamite having had a couple emotional affairs in my first marriage that were wrenching.

I will just have to chill out and let some time pass before I make any big decisions. Thanks for the feedback. I am finding it helpful as I know I 'm not thinking clearly right now.

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freeflyer200, may I be so bold and invite you to indulge the good members of this forum to your story in a separate thread? That way, your story won't get lost within this one.

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Guest freeflyer200

I tried approaching her again last night and it was a second disaster. I have decided to terminate my quest. It does not make sense for us. I can't be that selfish. This will end my thread.

I can sort of see a hall pass arrangement where there is just tacit approval granted while having avoided fully participating in the discussions leading up to that change in your relationship, although I do think it is extremely dangerous ground to be walking.

 

But, what is not clear to me is whether or not she knows you are looking for more than just a sex partner, but instead a lover. Huge difference there.

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We both have implied hall passes, and have had for years, but neither have beed used recently. Our playmates consist of another couple, and a single woman, and pretty much what goes on within that group needs no prior discussion. Although we are both fine with the other branching off, neither of us has done so for some time.

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freeflyer200, may I be so bold and invite you to indulge the good members of this forum to your story in a separate thread? That way, your story won't get lost within this one.

 

That was the most polite redirect I have ever seen. I have been on forums for many many years and I am impressed with the manners of this group every day.

 

Would it be possible for this community to create a utopia somewhere? If so tell me where and when... o wait.. I require being with in 50 mins of the beach at all times... so as long as the commune meets this requirement , sign me up. ;-)

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We both have hall passes as well and both of us have used them from time to time. The last time I used mine was just over a year ago and it was a blast, we both called our SO's and left the phones on speaker so that they could hear us and each other as well, this was preplanned, a long distance 4some.

 

L used hers a few weeks ago while I was out of town she hooked up with some friends in their hot tub.

 

Our only rule is that we need to call and okay it before starting to play.

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Have a hall pass but can not find anyone to share it with

 

I think the best way to use hall passes is to play as a couple, find people you trust and then use hall passes when you are not able to play as a foursome.

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II agree with funcoupledayton and did that until my wifes stroke. I have had a hall pass from the first day we were married. Her stroke destroyed a lot of her memory and caused a lot of confusion in her thinking. For the last twelve years we have been devoted to getting her better in mind and body. We attend socials and have a great time but she does not play.This puts me in a unique position for i am not single but i am not part of a couple that plays.Just wanted to add light to my first reply. All said i think all couples are unique and if the hall pass adds pleasure to both then use it.If it does not add to both and creates problems then do not use it.

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II agree with funcoupledayton and did that until my wifes stroke. I have had a hall pass from the first day we were married. Her stroke destroyed a lot of her memory and caused a lot of confusion in her thinking. For the last twelve years we have been devoted to getting her better in mind and body. We attend socials and have a great time but she does not play.This puts me in a unique position for i am not single but i am not part of a couple that plays.Just wanted to add light to my first reply. All said i think all couples are unique and if the hall pass adds pleasure to both then use it.If it does not add to both and creates problems then do not use it.

 

 

So then, you're not quite a single male as your status states. You're a married man whose wife doesn't play.

 

If your wife is going with you to your meet and greets, people know that she doesn't play. They would certainly know that it's OK for you to play without her and that she knows. That's half the battle right there. If a married man wanted to play with us, the hurdle is knowing that his wife is OK with the situation. I do not want to get shot in the back by a jealous wife. :)

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THANK YOU. Dave and Holly. YOU UNDERSTAND. I did not mention that i am old and not very attractive and that may be the reason or part of it that I have a problem hookng up. I am just a normal married man that has a wife that understands that sometimes I need more than just watching others and would like to participate in physical relationship with a female and ,am not a cheater home wrecker, or not just some piece of tail that would be dissrespecful of my wife. We are part of the lifestyle because it is about sharing and not just for pure sex act. Thanks for listening and contributing.

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I have a hall pass, but I just can't see myself using it.

 

She gave it to me mainly because we've been trying to swing for awhile now and she's always the person out of 4 that isn't into the other male. No problem, I don't bug her about it. But I think she realizes we've passed on a lot of opportunities because she's pretty particular.

 

So she gave me one and said, the next time you find one you like, I don't mind just staying at home and you can go alone.

 

But I can't imagine using it.

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I just answered this post, then I realized I already answered previously, so I edited out the second response - said the same thing - only it was shorter. Getting old sucks.......fortunately memory really is the first thing to go. LOL

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Yes. A few months ago, my husband gave me a free pass with two stipulations. 1. It be another woman. 2. He gets to watch OR I tell him all about it afterwards.

 

I actually would truly love to take him up on his offer (which I think is pretty amazing) but it's a matter of finding a woman to do this with. I have a friend who I think would be open to something but I am still hanging back, thinking about approaching her.

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The BF and I are Open, and essentially both of us have a hall pass. The rule is that we just need to have full disclosure afterwards. No secrets No lies.

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We both have hall passes. We definitely enjoy playing together as a couple both in the same room or separate rooms. However I have a very demanding job, working 70 - 90 hours a week whiih significantly limits my play time and energy for play. There are numerous ladies that I could play with seperately but I have not yet used my hall pass although I know that my wife is 100% cool with me using it.

I enjoy and am pleased that my wife does use hers frequently and not miss out on this in her life....I would feel guilty that my work demands would so short change her if she did not have this hall pass. We enjoy sharing the details of her play. Mrs. funlovin never hides what she is doing, I may not always know in advance of play, but I ultimately always know of the play.

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My wife has a hall pass that she can use when she wants to.. But she has not used it. I have asked a few times if she wants to use it and has declined. She says she fantasizes about doing it and knows who she wants to do it with but never has acted on it. I think I am going to just let it lay where it is and not bring it up agian..

 

What do you guys think?:rolleyes:

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My wife has a hall pass that she can use when she wants to.

 

I believe she does know what she wants. She feels satisfied with the knowledge that the pass was given. But she wants not to use it.

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      When my wife and I first started in the lifestyle, we had some hard rules.  One of which was no solo playing.  Six months and three BBC adventures later, she decided that the “no solo” play rule was nonsense and asked, more like begged, to be able to play alone five miles away. She was off for summer break.  Since I was working 30 miles away and she was home alone all day, I relented.
       
      About a week later, I came home from work and she was waiting for me in stilettos and a flowing summer dress sans underwear.  The dress was a halter type with a slit all the way past her thigh.  She also had the tell-tale twinkle in her eye that she usually gets after she climaxes.  Since she usually wears jeans and t-shirts during the day, I knew something was up.  She had a cocktail already made for me and an appetizer tray.  I was impressed.
       
      She led me to the living room sofa and when she sat down, her dress fell open and I could clearly see her bare pussy and one of her nipples.  Now I knew something great was about to happen.  I asked her how her day went and what was the reason for the seduction.  She then said, “I had a great day!”  Then she proceeded to tell me in detail what happened.
       
      Her BBC friend DJ came by on his tri-wheeled motorcycle to take her for a ride.  She was wearing a very short maroon skirt with a yellow sheer top.  She had a g-string but no bra.  She was not expecting a motorcycle ride.  He handed her a helmet and off they went.  Since she was in a short skirt, her pussy rubbed directly on the seat as they cruised.  The g-string enhanced he friction from the motorcycle vibration on the seat.  She nearly came from the ride itself.   After they returned to the house, she invited DJ in for some refreshments.
       
      Refreshments were quickly consumed and she led him to the bedroom where he helped her remove blouse and skirt.   As she dropped her g-string, her pussy stains were quite evident.  
      My wife is usually not very submissive. But for some reason, she enjoys when DJ dominates her and she tries things with him she never lets me or anybody else do.
       
      DJ is a former football player with a very muscular physique.  His cock is rather short for a black man, only about 5.5 inches long.  The girth of his cock however is unbelievable.  When he is flaccid, the circumference of his cock is close to the size of a Red Bull drink can.  When he is erect, he is almost as round as a beer can.  Since he is so wide, he easily hits her g-spot on every thrust which makes her cum in great quantities.  After he finished cumming in her pussy, they took a short rest to recover and replenish fluids.  As they were laying in each other’s arms, he made my wife get into a kneeling position and open her mouth.  He then grabbed her head and started to push his cock into her mouth which was no easy feat given his size. Unbelievable to her, she actually took most of his cock in her mouth and sucked him until he came down her throat.  Something she refuse to let me do.
       
      Next, he made her lay on her stomach with a pillow under her waist.  He then proceeded to flog her ass, thighs, and cunt lips with a leather flog.  She always said she didn’t care for BDSM activities but here she was, laying on her stomach with a cum load in her pussy, one in her belly, getting her genitals flogged by a stranger.  The more he flogged her cunt, the more she squirmed and moaned until she actually orgasmed.   
       
      She then felt cool coconut oil being rubbed on and in her sphincter.  She told me him was too big but he didn’t listen.  He then grabbed her by the hips and pushed his beer can cock into her ass.   After an initial painful gasp, she finally became accustomed to his cock in her ass and actually started fucking him.  When she grants me the rare opportunity to fuck her ass, she begs me to go fast so I cum quickly and finish.  Given DJ had already cum twice, there was no rushing him.  He pounded her ass for at 10 or more minutes until he came the third time.
       
      As she lay exhausted, DJ dressed and kissed her goodbye.  I came home about an hour later.
       
      As she related her experiences that day she noticed I was visibly aroused and decided it was my turn to have fun.  We went into the bedroom and I started to licking her all over.  While the shower she took after DJ left cleaned out her pussy, it didn't quite get all of his cum out of her ass.  I tasted another man’s cum for the first time in my life.  For some reason, she now enjoys an occasional flogging and ass fucking from me.                         
    • By a. synonymy
      Let me first apologize in advance if this (or something similar) has been covered and discussed extensively already. I'm sure my situation is not entirely new or original, but it is for me, so I'm throwing it out there. If you've got any experience or advice you'd like to drop my/our way, by all means, please do so. I also apologize for the length but the reality is that this deal has some history to it that I think is relevant.
       
      My wife (25) and I (27) have been married for five years, we have a son that just turned two. For several years, we've talked in foreplay about having other partners - but it was just talk for a very long time and nothing more. After the baby was born our sexuality dwindled considerably and until last summer, it seemed like it was going to evaporate into nothing. Well, at some point over the summer we both started seriously (and excitedly) considering the idea of swinging and perused some of the sites regarding it. We put a discreet profile out there, met a couple and after careful consideration, we had them over for dinner and whatever might come. To start off the night, we began fooling around with our own wives but no one ever 'made the move' and it ended up being a nervous and awkward event. They courteously left the next day and nothing happened.
       
      We continued to talk to the couple and decided to reschedule another night, but eventually we started getting cold feet about it and just decided to put the site and our vague and fledgling relationship with them behind us. So we did, but with some strange side effects remained lingering. My feelings about her with another guy are in somewhat flux, but for the most part, if it's the right guy/situation, I'm confident I could deal with it - considering seeing her with another man, as for many guys, is a huge turn on. For me, it's even a bigger turn on than getting it off with another woman. But my feelings are sporadic in this regard, so I can't say for certain how I feel. She, on the other hand, doesn't necessarily want to be with another man anymore. What she does want, from both a sexual and emotional angle, is that I explore having a relationship with another woman, but not strictly sexual. She wants me to have a real girlfriend on the side.
       
      Now I trust my wife on this. She's fully aware of this site and my posting here, as she'll no doubt read it upon me showing it to her (she may even participate). That being said, I want it to be known that she's not looking to split up our relationship or cover for something she's doing on the side. She's genuinely enjoyed talking about the idea, as far as I can tell, of me doing sexual things and emotional things (dating, caring for, commitment) with another woman.
       
      For the average married guy, I suppose this is an easy situation - you get to have sex outside of your marriage at your wife's consent, what could be better than that? And trust me, I see the advantages to it. That being said, I have some serious concerns...
       
      My major concern is who the hell would want something like that? How do I approach it with someone? We've done some extensive research on polyamory and swinging, so we're both comfortable with me having another girl who I have a relationship with, but I just don't even know where to begin to look for such a thing. How do you even breach that subject with someone I like without looking like I'm trying to find a clever way to cheat on your wife? I find people are usually on two sides of the bed with regard to having an emotional/sexual relationship outside of the marriage. Either they want to do it behind their spouse's back and are cheating -or- they simply want to experience the openness of sex outside their marriage like the average swinger. I'm somewhere in between the two and I'm not really familiar with how to handle that at all. To complicate things, we're close to my extended family and they are very religious - if something like this were to happen, it would have to be somewhat discrete? Is a relationship like that possible and enjoyable? Would another person ever consider something of that nature?
       
      Anyways, I've written a lot and I don't want to present an 'epic ton' of nonsense here. I've read this site from time to time and I figured it was a good place to find open and honest people to bring something like this up and get some good advice. Let me know how you would go about looking for another partner like this? How you would present the situation (I'm married but my wife wants me to have a girl friend) to someone? How would you maintain a relationship like this? What are the pitfalls? What should I look out for?
       

       
      Feel free to ask me any questions that might fill in the gaps. Thanks in advance for any responses...
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