Jump to content

DWDW2005

Registered
  • Content Count

    10
  • Joined

Community Reputation

15 Good

About DWDW2005

  • Rank
    Contributor

Personal Info

  • Location
    USA
  1. Thanks guys...we really appreciate the help! We ended up sending him an email from both of us last night, and he wrote back defending himself, and of course saying that we took him out of context....an that he was offended that we even thought this way of him, etc etc. We are really glad we posed this question to the board, so we could get a good perspective on things before he responded. Like we said, we are done with him. Thanks!
  2. I really appreciate all the helpful comments. You guys have really put things into perspective. We sent him a letter saying that we won't work with him anymore. In all fairness, we hate to pass judgement, and as such we won't say anything to anyone, in case it may just be a case of miscommunication. But regardless, we will keep our distance in the future. Again...much thanks!
  3. Well, we can't say that...in all fairness...in a lot of the pictures (but certainly not all), Steve does have his face in them. When we said that he was focusing on Mary, we meant her being the one to do solo shots, and most of the camera being focused on her and less on him.
  4. He only made Mary sign one, not Steve (and we're not married). We asked about Steve signing one, and he said not to worry, that all he needed was Mary's signature. We thought that was a bit odd. Wouldn't he need one from both of us?
  5. Yeah...you're definitely on point with that comment. I guess we are just very trusting (Mary more so than Steve! Steve was the first one to start seeing red flags). He was just extremely nice, and seemed to be friends with others at the club as well...so... Who knows, maybe we are being a little too concerned, but yeah just in case we are not dealing with him anymore. Again thanks all for the good advice. Its reassuring to hear that we are not the only ones who feel this way!
  6. Well, to be completely fair, he was sponsored by the club (which is very reputable), and he has the profesisonal website up as well. Yeah we should have asked. Thinking back on we were too trusting. As far as him keeping the pics, we are exhibitionists so that part is ok wih us. Yeah we hear ya. Its all you can expect when you get them for free. But then again, he kept asking us what kind of pics we wanted, and said he would do those as well (never did). No we've never met his wife...she wasn't at the club. We have made the decision to do no more with him. We loved the free pics (they really came out nice), but its just not worth it to get more. We just weren't sure if we should just ignore him from here on in, or say something. Well regardless, we won't do anything else with him anyway, so I guess its a moot point! Thanks for the good advice guys!
  7. That's what we are starting to think too. It was weird of him to 'warn us' so soon, when he had no reason to trust us with that information, since he didn't even really know us yet. Its funny...but the first meeting we had, another couple joined us (we were all meeting in the same place) just as he was leaving...he said he got a bad vibe from them, but they've ended becoming good friends of ours and we honestly don't see where he could have gotten a bad vibe from them...
  8. Hey all! First off, great board. Its nice to have a resource to go to here for those new in the lifestyle. We have a question to ask the board, but need to do so anonymously , as it may be a delicate situation. So while we will try to provide details, we can't get too specific. To describe us, we are a younger couple (in our 20's), who are pretty new to the lifestyle. We are very much in love, and will be getting married this year. To describe our relationship, we are extremely in love, and consider ourselves to be equal in every respect. We fall on the exhibitionist side of the fence, and have decided not to play with others, as we have both decided that we wouldn't be comfortable with sharing each other. (but being watched is totally our thing!). Anyway, here's the short and sweet of our problem. There is this swing club we've been going to, and being a good looking young couple we get a lot of attention there. Well, we meet this professional photographer who is affiliated with the club, and he seems like an extremely nice guy (he also says that he and his wife are not swingers, he just does a lot of photo work in the community). Anyway, we offers to do a free photo shoot with us (he asked us, we didn’t pursue it), as long as we let him use our pics in his portfolio. So of course we think....score! We agree. He seems very trustworthy, and on his initial meetings with us he even gives us the inside dirt on who to avoid in the club, even though some of the people he tells us to avoid are friends and /or associates of his. We tell him we want not only hardcore pics, but regular ones as well....classy, artsy, what have you. But when he does the shoot, he only does the hard core pics, and steers away from the other kind (although we should have pushed for it, but we didn't). It was ok, but he does a lot of shots where the female half of us is featured (we'll call her Mary) and a lot of solo shots of her, and the few solo shots of him (we'll call him Steve) we had to really push for it. So basically the shoot was much more centered on Mary, when we wanted it to be more about us. That didn't make us feel 100% comfortable, as we are both beautiful and we want shots that feature both of us. I mean, granted they were free, but we didn’t ask for the shoot…he offered it and asked what kind of shots we wanted. Anyway, we think everything is all good, the pics come back great, and he starts emailing Mary. Again, its all innocent, but he is almost too nice. Plus he begins to lavish Mary with praise...so hot, gorgeous, huge fan, the object of everyone’s desires, etc etc. At first signing off his emails with Hugs, and eventually up to Love. Again, it seems innocent at first, but as it continues it just seems weird, but Mary (with Steve's knowledge...no big deal) emails back because there is nothing concrete to base our weird feelings on. We feel maybe we were being too suspicious. He then wants to do another free photo shoot (although he has the pics he needs), and when Mary tells him over email that we want the classy, non erotic ones we didn't get before, he steers back towards doing the hardcore stuff. Then, after making comment after comment about how gorgeous Mary is, but never saying anything about Steve (we are both very attractive), Mary comments in an email that she wishes more people made comments on Steve (and yes we understand that females tend to get more attention). Over the next couple of emails, he states that Mary is much more attractive then Steve and that creates an imbalance in the pictures, and that Steve should be happy to bask in Mary’s glory, and to just be happy that he gets to be with her. He also makes reference to him just being a 'prop' in the pictures. Of course we were offended. Its one thing to make a comment about one of us being attractive, as we both get compliments like that. Its quite another to basically compliment one person at the other person’s expense. Now we are aware that most guys are going to look at the female part of the couple, but the fact the he is a PROFESSIONAL photographer, making those comments was over the line we feel. Plus, we feel that neither one of us has to bask in ANYONE’S glory. We have too much self respect for that. We bask in OUR glory…it is not all about one person. That, and the fact that he keeps wanting to do more free photo shoots with us (when he already has a couple hundred pics of us), is just starting to get weird (like too much of a good thing…definitely a red flag). We are starting to think maybe he gives a lot of free photo shoots away to good looking couples, instead of just us as he mentioned, and that maybe he has other intentions. Again…we are both very secure in ourselves, but this just seems very strange. We were offended, plus looking back it sees that he was taking us under his wing (giving us dirt on others) a bit too soon, when he didn’t really even know us at all…for example telling us not to trust couples where they are just into single females or couples, and not single guys, because then they are probably swinging because the guy in the relationship is pushing things forward, not both (if it were both wanting to swing, then I guess single males would be just as welcome, by his logic). Thing is, before we decided that sharing was not for us, that’s the direction we went...single females or couples (Mary is bi). It just seems that he is trying to get on Mary’s good side, develop quick trust, and make it a Mary and him vs Steve sort of deal. So here's the question...are we both overreacting? Like we said, we both consider ourselves to be equal, and most see us that way. And in our pics, we like them to be of both of us, as we feel that being together is one of the most beautiful things in the world, because we are truly in love and we want that portrayed in our pictures. Its just that when we got that last email, about how Steve is ‘less’ then Mary, how he creates an imbalance in the pictures, how much of a fan of Mary’s he is, how Steve is basically a ‘prop’ for her in the pics, and that Steve should be happy with it and just live with it…taken along with everything else is just raising some serious red flags. If we aren't overreacting, what would be the proper response? We are probably just going to ignore him, and not answer any more emails. Or should we write him back and confront him? What does everyone think? Thanks for your help... Mary & Steve
×
×
  • Create New...