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sportync

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About sportync

  • Rank
    Swingers Board Addict

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  • Location
    eastern north carolina
  • Interests
    art, photography, music
  • Occupation
    former medical technician
  1. In nearly every relationship I've witnessed during my life, one partner has controlled the bedroom activities...and it was almost always the one with the least desire for sexual activity. Almost, but definately not always, it was the woman...after all, it was her body which was going to be penetrated, so it was usually up to her how, when, how often and by whom this would happen. Only in couples who have embraced the lifestyle have I seen the liberty where each partner was free to express their own sexual fantasies and desires with the one they love, and still remain in love and on each other's side, as a couple should be. This takes a tremendous amount of trust, respect, self respect, communication and devotion to the idea that you truely want your mate to enjoy themselves to the fullest extent possible, and you also have a burning desire to share this experience with them... to be part of it, then to re-affirm your love afterwards. This, to me, is the essence of "Swinging". If it doesn't include your mate, then why do you have one? Sportync
  2. Aging, unreconstructed hippies....I like that!! Since tobacco is no longer politically correct, it's become the number one cash-crop in parts of the economically challenged south. But back to your question, as far as pro's, yes, it enhances the senses of touch, taste, sound, mood, etc., and sex involves all of the senses if performed properly. Cons would have to include "cotton-mouth", that dry feeling that you sometimes get that can interfere with certian aspects of sex.
  3. The responses I've read don't really surprise me, coming from the open-minded, trusting and loving people who frequent this site. My wife made me an offer recently that I found rather intriguing. Although she thoroughly enjoys taking me orally during foreplay, she thought that I might enjoy the experience of being deep-throated and swallowed at least once in my life. She has a couple of friends that are somewhat gifted in this particular ability, and she asked me if I would want to have one of them give me a treat, since this is something that she can't do herself. After further discussion, she told me that these girls don't really get any sexual pleasure from the act themselves, it's more of a joy of accomplishment and the ability to do something which other's can't that they enjoy. That pretty much gave me my answer. If both parties aren't really into the sex act, then it's time to change the act or change the partner. Now, my fantasy would be to have my wife sitting on my face while the other girl was working her magic, but my wife doesn't really wish to be involved. So, I can happily do without this particular treat. Now if I knew that the other girl would have a multiple orgasm while performing her magic, I might reconsider. That doesn't seem to be the case, though, so I think I'll pass.
  4. I've heard it said that, "It is an educated mind that can consider an opposing view without necessiarily accepting it." This, I think, holds true in this context. Some people swing every weekend, while others might make it an occasional experience. They both swing, but for different reasons. I feel that a forum such as this one is here so that information may be shared. That said, I don't really see how someone might feel "superior" to someone else just because of the level of their sexual activity. Different strokes, right? This is a place for sharing ideas, experiences and questions. I don't see why anyone should feel less welcome on this board just because they don't go to orgies every weekend. Chances are if someone decides not to swing, you are not going to change their mind on this board, but that's not the reason why it's here. You can help them to understand why you choose to swing. They can accept your views or not, but it's unlikely that you will change their own. You may help them to look at their own particular circumstances in a different light, or see things from a different angle. And that can be a good thing. Sportync
  5. My, this has been a fascinating couple of pages! I will try to refrain from repeating what a lot of people have already said, but there are some thoughts I have that haven't shown up yet. It seems to me that the sexual activity in a lot of marriages is pretty much controlled by the person with the lowest sex drive. That may very well explain why a lot of men tend to stray into affairs...they just aren't getting the stimulation that they feel they should. The sexual activity of most couples is fairly intense during the beginning of a relationship, yet tends to slow down as the years progress. One member of the couple doesn't require as much sexual satisfaction as the other, so the one with the lowest sex drive becomes the one behind the wheel. The other person then starts to feel like they are missing something. "I have pledged faithfulness to my wife, yet I know that when I go home tonight there isn't a snowball's chance in hell of me getting any". They then realize that they have absolutely no control over their own sexuality within the marriage...it's all up to the little woman as to when, where and how they will have sex. They have, by this time, seen their wife naked countless times, and realize that they will never again have the opportunity to see another woman naked and in their arms. The eroticism that was present in their early lovemaking is gone and is replaced by a comfortable feeling of safety and reassurance, but where is the excitement, the eroticism, the fun? This sacred act of love which is only shared with the one you have pledged your heart to becomes little more than scratching an itch or a good sneeze. Gone is the excitement, the nervous energy, the eroticism, the feeling of wonder and discovery, or even the naughtiness that comes from first-time experiences. So, the guy strays, not because he doesn't love his wife anymore, but because he craves the feeling of excitement that used to accompany sexual activity. His wife soon feels that something isn't right. He's not paying her much attention and soon she begins to feel neglected. She catches him in a few lies. Pretty soon, some other guy begins to give her the attention she isn't getting from hubby and before she knows it, this Lothario has gotten her slightly drunk and is banging the hell out of her. This is normal. If you consider normal to be 50% or more of the whole. Just look at how many lawyers are filthy rich because of cheating husbands and wives. This may explain why a lot of people decide to swing. They just want to revive the excitement in their sex-lives. It's been said that you can take the most beautiful, sexy woman in the world and there is one man who will not get excited at the thought of seeing her nude, or climbing into his bed....the guy who's been married to her for the last 7 or 8 years! Not to say that this is right, but it seems to be basic human nature. We tend to want that which we do not have. A lot of those within the swinging community have overcome this basic human weakness with something which they can share together, and many of them say that the best sex is with their own partner after the swing session is over. I know that I will not change the way you feel about swinging and I have no intention of even trying...the choice is entirely yours to make. I just wanted to try to put a few things into some perspective so that maybe you can understand where Ric may be coming from. We control every aspect of our fantasies, but little of our actual lives. But take away our fantasies, and what do we have left that we can control? Just a little food for thought. I wasn't offended by anything you posted, and I hope that I don't offend you, but you two don't just need to talk, you need to listen as well.
  6. The more I think about it, the more I begin to realize that it's not only Western Religion that seems to leave some serious vacant spots, but Western thought in general. Eastern philosophy and even Native American traditions seem to find a happy medium when it comes to man's place in the scheme of things. Man is here to enjoy the blessings and bounty of this beautiful earth of ours. He takes only what he needs, so that resources will remain for future generations and he uses all that he takes, wasting nothing. Western thought seems to go along the lines of "take anything and everything that you can easily make a dollar on, and if you leave a mess for your grandchildren to clean up, well, that's their problem....let them deal with it. The Indians hunted buffalo for countless generations and there were always plenty left for others. Then along came the train and the gun and in a few short years the buffalo were nearly extinct and the prairies were littered with bones of the dead ones that were killed and just left there to rot. The white men saw it as great fun, slaughtering them by the thousands just to see if they could hit the mark. But, believe it, someone got rich selling tickets for buffalo hunts from train cars. Western religion, like most western thought seems to miss the mark. Rather than trying to explain our place in the over-all scheme of things, it seems to me that a lot more energy is spent telling us what we better not do if we want to go to Heaven. Don't wear make-up or short skirts, don't drink alcohol ( or coffee or tea), don't eat meat on Friday, don't dance, don't smoke, don't do any work on Sunday. And we Americans, descended from Puritans, are probably the worst of them all when it comes to our sexual hangups. I dare say there is probably no major developed country on the face of the earth with as many lawyers and psychiatrists as we have. We spend more money on shrinks and lawyers than the gross national product of many countries. All of our major cities now have war-zones that the cops won't even go near after dark. We have major surpluses on crops, yet many American kids go hungry. We have cities full of crack-ho's, junkies and killers, and this is where we raise our children. Over half of the marriages wind up in divorce court, and legal drugs are as big a problem as illegal ones. Of course, the jails are not filled with professors and doctors wives strung out on Valium...they're filled with kids caught smoking marijuana. Seventy-five per cent of the world Cocaine production winds up here and even though we spend billions each year on the "war on drugs", you can easily purchase ANY drug you could want in ANY prison in the country. If they can't keep it out of maximum-security prisons, how in hell do they think they can keep it out of a country with thousands of miles of open borders? The Indians in Peru have been chewing those same leaves for generations and never had a "drug problem". Likewise, Mexicans have been smoking Marijuana for generations and they never seemed to have a "drug problem". Yet look at us. Our prisons are filled with kids who smoked pot and our cities are war-zones because of crack. I think it comes back to the"western"idea of "I want it all, and I want it NOW!!" And people may wonder, "Why would you want to swing?" With all this shit going on all around me, can anyone really blame me for wanting to share a little fun with some friends? I mean, really!
  7. I don't consider myself a "born-again" Christian....rather a "thinking-again" Christian. I've read the Bible (several times) and feel a certian understanding of a lot of it. I've also read the Gita, parts of the Koran and many other books on the subject of spirituality and religion. Also, I've heard a couple of thousand sermons over the years, and I honestly feel that most of western thought on the subject leaves a big vacant spot, especially in the realm of our place in the scheme of things. I don't really "buy" into any one religion, but there are basic truths in all of them. I do believe in God and Jesus, because I've just seen too much of their influence in our lives to dismiss them as false. I believe in the power of prayer and the power of love. Again, I've seen too much first hand to dismiss them as false. I've witnessed miracles personally, so I know them to be real. Man is probably the only species on the planet that is aware of his own mortality, so he created religion to try and explain what might happen after we are gone. But it goes a lot deeper than that. Star Wars put it plainly but pretty clearly. You can choose the dark side of the Force or the Light side, and once you choose, you then have a path to follow...a way to guide you through life. Where swinging or anything else falls into the mix is for each person to figure out for themselves. Life is really all about the choices we make and accepting the consequences of those choises. Sportync
  8. This would definitely fall into the category of questions with many answers. I guess that you must go with your own feelings on this. Many "religious" people can use the Bible to make a case for just about anything... even playing with rattle snakes in church, but If you let the guy up there in the pulpit make your decisions for you, then I don't think that you have an especially close relationship with your God. The Bible says "Love God and love your neighbor". This is the basis for the ten commandments, and if the things you do are done with love as your main measure, then I don't see how they can be offensive to God. He gave us our sex drives, He created all the beautiful people in the world and He made them attractive to us. He gave us enthusiasm and imagination and invested us with a sense of adventure. If we use these gifts to further our joy in His creations as well as the joy of those we love, then I also don't think that He would be displeased with us. I never came across any Biblical reference to God punishing Saul or David for keeping hundreds of wives and concubines, yet he did punish David for his taking of another man's wife. It was done with deceit and trickery and it was stealing, plain and simple. Whenever I make love with my wife or with a group of people, I sincerely believe that I am giving every bit as much if not more than I am taking. If God is displeased with this, I'm sure that he will let me know. I certainly don't need to hear about it from some Bible-thumping hypocrite who feels like he's the only one holding the keys to the kingdom.
  9. As long as it's fresh, I'll eat one. Little lips, big lips, small hood, big hood, it really doesn't matter much to me as long as the lady who owns it wants me there, I'll be more than happy to oblige. I do like nibbling on the inner lips and really love the way they seem to clutch a penis as if to keep it from popping out. Ahhh, I'm gettin' hungry just thinkin' about it!
  10. HMR, that's some tight stuff! I bet you got an "A" in health class when it came to doing the "Kegal"!
  11. I think that the average person (or couple) tends to allow society to dictate a lot of their behavior with arbitrary rules set up long ago to try and deal with social situations as they were 100-150 years ago. Many of these rules are based on myth, religious belief, social concerns or other abstract ideas which really have no place in 21st century America. Yet the taboos they put in place, like the Berlin Wall, are tough to tear down. Society tends to reject change, yet change is constant, even when it goes unrecognized. My wife and I didn't consciously decide to become swingers. One night, she had a friend over and the two of them jumped my bones. I loved it. It was a fantasy of mine that she knew about and she loved me enough to make it a reality. Nothing more of that nature happened for over a decade. We wound up skinny-dipping with a couple we were very close to, and before the month was over, we all wound up in bed together on several occasions. We still hadn't decided to become swingers. We've had several other experiences, all enjoyable and I think we're on a different level of understanding now. We openly communicate our desires to each other and if we discover that we're both turned on to the same idea, we consider pursuing it. We never sat down and said, "Let's become swingers!", but we understand each other much better now than we ever had before and we've got some really great memories to share and hopefully there will be more in the future.
  12. Back to the Jeffersons and the Bunkers...that thought still makes me smile. I can just picture George Jefferson doing Edith from behind while chanting,"Who's yo daddy! Who's yo daddy!" Edith would exclaim, "OOOHHH Archie, you've never done that before! OOOOOOHHHH George, that feels real nice!" Meanwhile Archie would be easing into Weezie and saying," alright, dere, Weezie, I'm going to go nice and slow like, so's I don't hurt youze", and Weezie would reply,"Quit your damn jabberin', and get to it Archie!" I can imagine the Flintstones and the Rubbles, but Fred would probably want to do a threesome with Wilma and Betty while Barney worked the camera. And Barney would probably be cool with that....so would Betty. Bewitched could have had some great possibilities, but I really think that all the relationships on that show were way too screwed up to really make swinging a viable alternative....they just weren't emotionally ready for swinging....they definately needed to work on better communication skills. Ok, Happy days. Ritchie's mom and the Fonzie...Richie's sis Joanie and the Fonzie...Mr. and Mrs. Howard and the Fonzie.....Joanie and Chachai and the Fonzie...oh, and all the babes at the Arnold's and the Fonzie....He's the answer to the often-asked question of "Why do singles want to swing?" And lastly, "Cheers".......well, I really think that they would just lock the doors, open the bottles and let the orgy begin....oh, wait, they were in Boston! They just don't do things like that in Boston, do they?
  13. And can you imagine the Jefferson's and the Bunker's hooking up for a swap??
  14. Remember the Avengers? Steed and Emma Peele definately! Miss Kitty does Dodge City? Definately Jeanie and the Major! Peter Gunn and that hot, busty secretary of his (showing my age) Everybody loves Raymond, but he complains way too much...I think his wife would just get jiggy behind his back with his brother. Frasier and his brother might do a 3-some with the English girl while pop worked the camera. the whole cast of that 70's show with the exception of Red....he'd go ballistic and shoot everybody. The Tellie-Tubbies are probably into tellie-orgies. Ren and Stempy??Now, that's an ugly picture! Austin Powers...mmmmm. do 'ya think?? Sportync
  15. Well, Rose, y'all are still talking and still friends, so why keep worring about something that has already happened? There's absolutely nothing that you can do, now, to prevent what has occured, so make the most of it and enjoy the friendship you have with these folks. They will probably be needing the kind of support you get from friends in the next few months, and if you are pretty comfortable with each other, Joe and Ken might just keep you real busy during the 3rd trimester!! Just think...two horney guys to take care of you for three months....things could be worse, you know. I certianly don't mean to make light of something as important as this is, but hey, another life is coming into the world. That's a good thing! Sportync
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