So my husband and I have been married for 5 years. It has been pretty rocky. He never wanted monogamy and had never been in a monogamous relationship before me. We married and we’re having so much sex that it didn’t phase him.
Then we had some life troubles and the sex slowed way down. It has put a pretty big damper on our marriage.
The thought of having a non-monogamous relationship has always been an uncomfortable topic for me. My husband isn’t a cheater but her has expressed wanting to be more sexually adventurous. I always took that as an insult to me and our marriage.
Recently, I met a new friend. We got very close, very fast. She’s my best friend. We talk about everything and anything, all day, everyday. We went on a vacation with my side of the family and actually invited her and her husband with. It was the first time we had been around each other’s husbands. Immediately, we picked up on my friends’ husband being very flirtatious. I didn’t make anything out of it because my husband has been the same way.For the last month, we have spent numorous nights at their house and have been talking and getting together a lot. We have grown oddly comfortable with each other for such a short amount of time. There’s been a lot of sexual innuendoes. I finally addressed it in a light and playful manner with my best friend on if they actually wanted to swing. She said she was interested. We king of looking into 4-sums while on FaceTime but eventually started talking about something else.
I’m not sure if it will amount to anything. My husband says he’s conflicted because he has been suggesting this for years and I have been resistant to it and now he feel like because my best friend said she would, now I want to. Which I can’t totally disagree with.
I would be interested in swinging with them now, but can’t envision myself seeking other couples out.
Now I’m not sure about the following:
-my husband love each other but definitely don’t have a rock solid relationship. Lack of sexual excitement is a big problem. I’ve heard that swinging can be great for an already strong marriage, but can it be good for one that’s struggling?
-ive heard you shouldn’t swing with your friends. We are already so open with each other, so I don’t see a problem, but I’ve been warned not to do it. But like I said, I don’t think I would want to do it with random people.
-my husband could be right. I entered an emotionally abusive relationship at 15 and got pregnant shortly have so I have ZERO “adult” experiences. Maybe I am just now being open to this because I want to follow and be adventurous. I’m not sure. I do know that reading the stories and seeing some of the porn has gotten me extremely turned on.
Anyway, sorry that was so long, any advice from experienced swingers would be amazing.