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Content Count
20 -
Joined
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Days Won
1
harplitt last won the day on February 2 2019
harplitt had the most liked content!
Community Reputation
25 ExcellentAbout harplitt
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Rank
Contributor
- Birthday 08/20/1971
Personal Info
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Relationship Status
Couple
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Location
Pennsylvania
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Swinging Experience
3 years or so.
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Anniversary
xx/xx/xxxx
Swinger Info
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SLS Name
HarpLitt
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Favorite Club(s)
Used to be RolePlay in ACNJ, but closed now. Trying to find a new place.
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That may also have something to do with the 20 years of growth you experienced in between you first foray and your most recent.
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I gotta tell you that your emotions are valid. Your feelings aren't out of line based on what you experienced. That being said, you do not have to feel that way if you don't want to. I'm not saying there's a switch you can flip or anything, but you sound a bit wounded. And if you want to and take steps to do so, you can heal. Step 1: trust your wife. She's been by your side for 30 years. That means something and if she says you make her happy and you say she is your rock, believe here and count yourself lucky. Not every one has that. Continue to trust her and believe her when she tells you how she feels. Step 2: Find yourself a quality counselor you can trust. You deserve to be happy, and a counselor can help you see things in a healthy light. Step 3: Start small and make some changes for a healthier physical you. I'm a stranger and I'm no body shamer. But, what you said seems to indicate that you are not satisfied with how you look and feel physically. Look at your diet. Consult with a doctor to develop a fitness plan. You don't need to look like you did 20 years ago, but you should be able to live your life feeling strong and alert and alive and happy and healthy. Do it for you. Not your wife, not that couple you mentioned, not anybody but you. Step 4: Try to give yourself a break. You come off as a pretty decent guy with a good heart and a great wife. If that other couple did reject you, so be it. It says more about them than you. Maybe it was because of your shape or they weren't feeling the chemistry or who knows what. It doesn't have to matter. You control you, and you control your present. You can't control them or the past. Step 5: Go to Desire Pearl. That place is awesome and we saw every shape and size there - all accepted and appreciated. You got this, bud. You're gonna be just fine.
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At every party, club, or resort we have ever been to, the other people there were wonderfully accepting of our limits. No one gets upset if you don't want to do certain things. It's about having fun, connecting, being comfortable. My wife and I are soft swingers, which for us means we do lots of fun stuff with other people, but not intercourse. And we are always together. We have never felt like we weren't welcome or accepted by people who weren't into what we were into. I can almost guarantee that wherever you end up, the people in the lifestyle will treat you and your wife with respect and you will experience zero pressure.
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I need vacation advice
harplitt replied to Nikniksh's topic in Swinger Clubs, Parties, Resorts, and Cruises
This post might be flagged for directing you to another source, but if you go to this forum, you'll have great info about Desire resorts. We went last year, and this forum truly prepared us for what we were getting into, and made the entire trip that much better: Desire Resorts Forums -
The pool has been shut down since September for a full rebuild. The rooms look good on the website, but I've been tricked by the internet before! Anyone been there in the last couple of years? I've read that improvements have been made in recent years, but that was from somewhat biased sources.
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Looks promising as a less expensive trip than Desire or Hedo. Anyone ever been?
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Hotel Takeovers like a resort?
harplitt replied to harplitt's topic in Swinger Clubs, Parties, Resorts, and Cruises
You made me spit out my coffee! -
Hotel Takeovers like a resort?
harplitt replied to harplitt's topic in Swinger Clubs, Parties, Resorts, and Cruises
Looking at a trip to Vegas in July - so this is very appreciated. Was hoping very much to have an experience a bit better than what others say we'd get at the Green Door, etc. -
Hotel Takeovers like a resort?
harplitt replied to harplitt's topic in Swinger Clubs, Parties, Resorts, and Cruises
Thanks! Appreciate that. But you've gotta give Desire a shot. We loved it. -
Hotel Takeovers like a resort?
harplitt replied to harplitt's topic in Swinger Clubs, Parties, Resorts, and Cruises
Thanks, guys. And if you haven't been to Desire, we highly recommend it! -
If you have a sexy attitude and a friendly disposition, you have nothing to worry about. Chemistry doesn't come about due to bra size. It just happens. We like awesome people. I'm a stranger, but I'm guessing you don't need implants to be happy, so don't get them to make someone else happy.
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- breast size
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Wife's fantasy - Voyeurism. Suggestions?
harplitt replied to SYLVER's topic in Curious About Swinging?
Exactly how we broke in, which then turned into wanting to be watched. Blossomed from there. GoldCoCouple is absolutely right. Go to a club, don't be afraid to watch others. Part of the reason they are there is because they like to be watched. You guys would be doing them a solid - same as they are doing for you by allowing you to watch them. Club is the way to go. Good luck, and have fun. -
Favorite Club Closed! What now?
harplitt replied to harplitt's topic in Swinger Clubs, Parties, Resorts, and Cruises
I was a little coy in my original post. We live right in the middle of all those clubs you mentioned, and avoid them becasue of the possibility of running into people who might know us. I have the kind of high visibility job that means I can't be discovered to be in the lifestyle. I also have a lot of family in Philly, which is why we've always been forced to go to Atlantic City. Just trying to mitigate the risk. We tried Saints and Sinners in AC, but it was dead. Only about 30 people and they were only there to get a peek, not live the lifestyle. We're looking at going back in November to give it one more chance, but Role Play was perfect for us and where we are in the lifestyle. -
We used to love RolePlay in Atlantic City. But they closed last year and though they originally advertised that they'd be relocating, it seems like that isn't going to happen. It was close enough to get there easily, but far enough to be discrete. So where can we go now? Tried Saints and Sinners in AC, but it was kinda dead and empty. Not sure if that was typical or an anomaly. So, within a few hours of Philly (but not in Philly, please), where do you like to go?