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HollySwinger

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    3
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About HollySwinger

  • Rank
    Just Getting Started
  • Birthday 04/05/1985

Personal Info

  • Relationship Status
    Couple
  • Location
    Atlanta, GA
  • Anniversary
    xx/xx/xxxx
  1. Hi there, and thanks for the advice and interest. My husband and I went to the house party (I think there were 8 or 9 couples there) and we enjoyed socializing and meeting some new people. My husband and I played with one couple who were new to us, which was fun! But we didn’t play with our former poly bf/gf, and that was disappointing. I know they are trying to make new connections in their new hometown, but I think I deserve a bit more considering what we had for so long...I would’ve been happy with 20 minutes of play at some point during the evening. I tried a few times to show my interest but each time I felt like a puppy dog begging for attention and not a desired, equal partner. Late in the evening when much of the group play was over and people were leaving or going to bed, I said to him, “I’d hoped we could play tonight.” But as he and I were getting started, she came in the room with a new couple and asked me to leave. I didn’t make a fuss, but that felt incredibly disrespectful. I know I’m being needy, and I know that’s not attractive. But I have reasonable needs and I think I’m worth more than what I’m getting. One of our mutual friends who was also at the house party called me after we got home because she saw how we were being treated and she was upset we were not being treated better. I’m just not sure what to do from here.
  2. Thanks, friends. We are supposed to see them this weekend at a LS party they are throwing, and it's making me anxious. This isn't easy.
  3. Hi friendly swingers of the internet! My husband and I are active swingers who go to events, have a good circle of swinger friends, and have been in the LS for a number of years. This is my first time turning to a more anonymous message board because I'm not sure how to talk about this with my swinger friends...at the risk of coming across as high maintenance :/ We were in a pretty intimate poly relationship with another couple for almost two years. Guy and I would spend the night together just the two of us, we all said I love you, got gifts for each other, spent holidays together, go on vacations together, things like that. They were not only great sexual partners, but also became our best friends. Throughout this time, we were all also swinging with other people. A number of issues arose between us, some having to do with jealousy due to outside swinging, but most significantly they moved a few hours away. So the relationship had to change. I still feel invested. But I'm not sure how to make the adjustment from a more intimate, poly relationship to a regular swinger friendship again. Everyone else seems ready to do this, but I guess I'm not. I have plenty of great, fun, light swinger friendships...but it's hard for me to think about having this style of relationship with this particular couple. However, I don't want to be left with nothing! Has anyone on this board dealt with "downgrading" ("reverting"?) a poly relationship back to a light, friendly swinger relationship, one where you can still play, attend parties, have group sex, etc...but not be poly anymore? Or is this just a case of pandora's box...since we went down that path, it's going to be all or nothing? Do I just enjoy the relationship for what it is now? Or do I be the drama queen who calls it quits on something I actually liked, just because it's not the same as what it once was? In the "vanilla" world, when you break up with someone, you don't typically have sex with them again, and again, and again. So what's a swinger (and in this case, poly) girl to do? TL; DR: It's hard for me to swing with my ex-poly bf. Can the "backwards" transition from poly bf/gf to lighthearted swinger friend work?
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