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Authorjoseromer

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  • Content Count

    7
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20 Excellent

About Authorjoseromer

  • Rank
    Just Getting Started
  • Birthday 03/12/1965

Personal Info

  • Relationship Status
    Single male
  • Location
    Espanola new mexico
  • Anniversary
    xx/xx/xxxx
  1. Update. My girlfriend talked to me last night. She said she doesn't want to swing in any way. The fantasy of it is great, but she said she wouldn't feel right actually doing it. I told her everything is fine. If she doesn't want to I support her feelings. The one thing I have learned here is communication is key to everything. Our relationship has grown a lot in such a short time. Our relationship comes first. Every relationship no matter if it's normal or in the lifestyle needs strong communication and trust. As for writing my book on the lifestyle, that is now on hold. I was going to use interviews to gather information but no one has responded. I even posted in here. Anyway, I want to thank everyone for your advice. It has helped my current relationship so much. Maybe soon we will be married. Due to our communication we have never been closer.
  2. I want to thank everyone for your advice. We talked last night a little, she said she would like to be watched while we have sex. But just us no one else. That's why she said that at the dance club. She said if ever anything went further, it would be like a same room soft swap, where there is only kissing and touching. But no oral or penetration...she said that would be for us to do only with each other in the same room. Is there such a thing as that? And will it be hard to find couples that would accept those rules? She wants me to write the book about the lifestyle. But I will do it by interviewing couples in the lifestyle...by phone or email or messages. I think it's a good idea to write it first. That way I can write without adding my personal opinion. Thank you all for being so kind and understanding.
  3. You're right. That ship is long gone. I did take some time to work on myself. I wrote and published three books...kept my mind busy. I even want to write one on the lifestyle but how can I write about something I know nothing about? With my current relationship, she is the exact opposite of my ex. Very outgoing and always positive about everything. One night we were at a nightclub dancing and I said what would you do if this was a swingers club? She said, "strip for you and fuck you in front of everyone." That blew my mind. Since then I haven't brought up the subject. I'm afraid of a repeat of what my ex did, but I realize everyone is different. What would be the best way to bring up the subject? Should it be little questions or a full out discussion?
  4. Thank you for your replies. I have beat myself up about this since the divorce. I blamed myself a lot for starting the ball rolling. I did try to talk to her after the no show, but she would not open up. I did think our relationship was strong, having survived my multiple deployments, some as long as eleven months. I still have the thoughts on having a mfm threesome. I am just afraid to go through it all over again. I will work on my current relationship and hopefully one day it will be strong enough to actually take our first step. But first I will put the advice I have received here to work...rock solid communication and trust. And if her answer is no, at least we will have a solid relationship.
  5. Hello. About two years ago I brought up the fantasy I had of having a threesome. Mmy wife didn't say much but the sex that night was wild, so I thought she would be interested. For a couple of months we would both bring it up during sex but it never left the bedroom. Then one day she was online and asked me if I was serious about a threesome? I said yes, but we have to talk about the details. A couple of weeks later out of the blue she said she would be willing, so we talked about our fears and rules. She said she would look online to see if anyone would be suitable. One night after dinner, she told me she wanted to show me a couple of candidates. After looking we decided on one. She sent him a message and we started messaging him. I could see how excited she was getting. He agreed to come over the next night. My wife was excited. I could see it in her face. My wife is very attractive. One of my biggest fears why I was deployed over the years was her leaving me, but now I was going to have another man join us. My head was swimming also, this felt so unreal. Anyway, the night came, so she sent him a message to see what time he would arrive. He said within the hour. An hour went by then two. She sent another message and no reply. He never showed. I could see the disappointed look on her face. For the next couple of days she looked depressed. I told her we could try again with someone else. She said she didn't want to anymore. To make things short...she was on her computer a lot more, and there were times I would walk into the the room and on a couple of occasions I swear she would pull her shirt down, or would click off, being very suspicious. Then two weeks before Christmas, she said she wanted to leave, no explanation. She refused talk about why. By that New Year's Day, she had moved out to be with her new boyfriend...it devastated me. Now I think back and wonder. Did the threesome thing start something? If it would have happened, would it have helped hold the marriage together by living a fantasy? Or it would have ended that much sooner? Now I am in a relationship with an amazing woman way younger than me and who I feel is out of my league...and I know to keep my thoughts to myself or I might start something and lose her also.
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